Jump to content

Wine, Wait, and Whine


kris10mb

Recommended Posts

On 1/30/2017 at 3:57 AM, Beals said:

same timeline for me... I'm expecting Feb 12 at the earliest.  You'd think this means I would be able to freaking CHILL until at least early Feb, but ---- ALAS!!!! There is no chill in sight!!!

 

Several of the programs I applied won't get back til Feb/March but I am still checking all of their websites a few times a week anyways.  Anxiety is a funny/but not fun thing. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

3 hours ago, waitnhope said:

The waiting game is really hard. We just have to remain confident in our abilities! Honestly, I hope I hear an acceptance before a rejection. So far, I haven't heard either. Good luck everyone!

 

I read this a while ago at work, thanks for being so positive!!  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I've been really struggling the past week or so. I got rejected from my top two choices and my best guess is that I've been waitlisted at my "safety" school. It's been rough but I'm trying to stay positive. However, now that I've reached this low, I find that my anxiety level has dropped significantly. I'm actually going a normal amount of time between checking emails and have actually been productive in my work. 

This seems like a super depressing post, but as I'm learning to deal with the rejections, I'm finding peace. Hope that the rest of you find a calm place within yourselves - hopefully through good news, but if not, then in spite of the bad. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

14 minutes ago, kris10mb said:

I've been really struggling the past week or so. I got rejected from my top two choices and my best guess is that I've been waitlisted at my "safety" school. It's been rough but I'm trying to stay positive. However, now that I've reached this low, I find that my anxiety level has dropped significantly. I'm actually going a normal amount of time between checking emails and have actually been productive in my work. 

This seems like a super depressing post, but as I'm learning to deal with the rejections, I'm finding peace. Hope that the rest of you find a calm place within yourselves - hopefully through good news, but if not, then in spite of the bad. 

I'm really sorry about your top two choices. Coping with bad news is definitely challenging, but it's admirable that you've been able to find peace and look at the positive side of things.

I see that you've applied to 4 different schools, so I'm hoping that you hear good news from the last one.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

@csot - Thanks for the good vibes. I've resigned myself to taking another year off between my M.A. and Ph.D...it's not ideal, but it is what it is. I'm not a big believer in religion or a higher power but I do think that the universe unfolds as it should. It just wasn't meant to be for me this time around. But I have to believe that there is something bigger and better waiting for me and I just can't see it yet. 

Next time around I'll try and cast a wider net than just four schools but as I paid for all of the applications/sending of GRE scores myself, I just couldn't afford to apply to more schools this time around on an adjunct salary. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

52 minutes ago, kris10mb said:

@csot - Thanks for the good vibes. I've resigned myself to taking another year off between my M.A. and Ph.D...it's not ideal, but it is what it is. I'm not a big believer in religion or a higher power but I do think that the universe unfolds as it should. It just wasn't meant to be for me this time around. But I have to believe that there is something bigger and better waiting for me and I just can't see it yet. 

Next time around I'll try and cast a wider net than just four schools but as I paid for all of the applications/sending of GRE scores myself, I just couldn't afford to apply to more schools this time around on an adjunct salary. 

 

I feel you on the pain of applying for school money-wise - I applied for 8 programs total plus the GRE and it added up so quickly and painfully. 4 Does seem a bit low, so hopefully if nothing works this year (I bet something will, though!) go ahead and cast a wider net as you said. You have more time to explore your interests and develop you application as well which is always beneficial!  Good luck!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

3 hours ago, kris10mb said:

@csot - Thanks for the good vibes. I've resigned myself to taking another year off between my M.A. and Ph.D...it's not ideal, but it is what it is. I'm not a big believer in religion or a higher power but I do think that the universe unfolds as it should. It just wasn't meant to be for me this time around. But I have to believe that there is something bigger and better waiting for me and I just can't see it yet. 

Next time around I'll try and cast a wider net than just four schools but as I paid for all of the applications/sending of GRE scores myself, I just couldn't afford to apply to more schools this time around on an adjunct salary. 

I applied to four schools last year. Rejected by two, and waitlisted at two (including one that I considered sort of a "safety"-- as much as any programs can be considered a safety in this process). Ultimately, I didn't get off either wait list.

This year I applied to 12 schools. I cast a much wider net and when I allowed myself to disregard geography (I'd been looking right around New England exclusively last year... well, and Cornell). So far I have 2 acceptances, 1 rejection, and still waiting on 9 schools. I didn't change much in my application-- very slight edits to my SOP and writing sample and one different LOR because I couldn't get in touch with a retired professor. Both of the acceptances I have so far (Wisconsin-Madison and Minnesota) are much better fits and in general higher ranked programs than what I applied to last year. My point is this: I was absolutely devastated last year when I ended up with 4 rejections; now I am incredibly grateful that those schools didn't work out because I'm going to end up in a much better spot for me. 

I think there's something to be said for trusting that things unfold as they should. Sending you positive vibes for the rest of this season, and if it doesn't work out as you'd first hoped, don't give up. Be kind to yourself and try not to be discouraged. This process can be incredibly arbitrary and you'll end up where you're meant to be. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

After finally finishing my conclusion and intro to my thesis and sending it to my advisor (I topped 200 pages!) I decided to finally read something non poverty related.  Naturally I chose the one book that would give anyone applying to grad school pause.  Has anyone else read Inside Graduate Admissions: Merit, Diversity, and Faculty Gatekeeping?  I made it 1/4 of the way through the book tonight and her findings reflect the confusion I've watched on this board.  No one knows what these committees are looking for because it isn't consistent, none of them are the same...idk after seeing the discussion on here today I thought I'd share/suggest others looking for insight. The only thing she suggests helps are good GRE's even though they aren't a good predictor of success.  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

In my country, wine comes by VERY hard. Illegal, actually. Bad hombre country. Beer is even harder. You get piss-warm beer for an arm and a leg. So it's whine wait whine for us. The pain never dulls. The wait is hard. Life is a torture. Existence hurts. </whine>

Link to comment
Share on other sites

7 hours ago, montanem said:

After finally finishing my conclusion and intro to my thesis and sending it to my advisor (I topped 200 pages!) I decided to finally read something non poverty related.  Naturally I chose the one book that would give anyone applying to grad school pause.  Has anyone else read Inside Graduate Admissions: Merit, Diversity, and Faculty Gatekeeping?  I made it 1/4 of the way through the book tonight and her findings reflect the confusion I've watched on this board.  No one knows what these committees are looking for because it isn't consistent, none of them are the same...idk after seeing the discussion on here today I thought I'd share/suggest others looking for insight. The only thing she suggests helps are good GRE's even though they aren't a good predictor of success.  

That sounds interesting-- I'll have to look into it. It can be unnerving to think about the nature of this process, but it really helps me not to take the rejections (as) personally. Of course it feels validating to get an acceptance, but a rejection doesn't say much about an applicant. Easier said than done to internalize this, but it helps to be reminded. Thanks!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

@csot I hope so too!  I am now at 5 no's and 1 maybe and so I'm starting to get scared that I just threw away a bunch of money applying to programs...my advisor was sure I'd get in somewhere but I am having serious anxiety now especially with some people having heard from some programs I applied to (Davis, Boulder, PennState...).  I know I've said no news isn't bad news but right now the not knowing makes me worry that I'm not getting in. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

21 hours ago, c11m07 said:

I applied to four schools last year. Rejected by two, and waitlisted at two (including one that I considered sort of a "safety"-- as much as any programs can be considered a safety in this process). Ultimately, I didn't get off either wait list.

This year I applied to 12 schools. I cast a much wider net and when I allowed myself to disregard geography (I'd been looking right around New England exclusively last year... well, and Cornell). So far I have 2 acceptances, 1 rejection, and still waiting on 9 schools. I didn't change much in my application-- very slight edits to my SOP and writing sample and one different LOR because I couldn't get in touch with a retired professor. Both of the acceptances I have so far (Wisconsin-Madison and Minnesota) are much better fits and in general higher ranked programs than what I applied to last year. My point is this: I was absolutely devastated last year when I ended up with 4 rejections; now I am incredibly grateful that those schools didn't work out because I'm going to end up in a much better spot for me. 

I think there's something to be said for trusting that things unfold as they should. Sending you positive vibes for the rest of this season, and if it doesn't work out as you'd first hoped, don't give up. Be kind to yourself and try not to be discouraged. This process can be incredibly arbitrary and you'll end up where you're meant to be. 

 

It was good to hear about your experience, and I'm sure @kris10mb will agree that it is helpful! It is hard when we don't know exactly what will happen, but as @c11m07 said, whatever happens its for a reason! Let's stay positive through our woeful distress :unsure:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 2/7/2017 at 4:39 PM, kris10mb said:

I've been really struggling the past week or so. I got rejected from my top two choices and my best guess is that I've been waitlisted at my "safety" school. It's been rough but I'm trying to stay positive. However, now that I've reached this low, I find that my anxiety level has dropped significantly. I'm actually going a normal amount of time between checking emails and have actually been productive in my work. 

This seems like a super depressing post, but as I'm learning to deal with the rejections, I'm finding peace. Hope that the rest of you find a calm place within yourselves - hopefully through good news, but if not, then in spite of the bad. 

I feel this!! I was just rejected from my top pick which I felt super confident about because my POI and I met in person previously and she said she wanted to work with me... My first response was a wait list from my other top pick. My last two apps are both out of my league I'm fairly certain so I'm coming to terms with my disappointment and that I will have to apply again next year. I feel like I can just focus on writing my thesis now. Best of luck to you!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 2/8/2017 at 8:03 PM, csot said:

I told my sister to order Chinese food because we didn't have anything to eat at home, and (I kid you not) this was my fortune. :lol: 

image.jpeg

Ah, what a nail biter!! Please update us on whether the cookie told the truth!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I have been remarkably zen the last week or two, but not knowing about Stanford is getting to me. I see two acceptances by phone Jan 30th/31st (when they don't usually notify by phone), 11 rejections Feb 2nd/3rd, two waitlists Feb 6th/7th... and I've heard nothing. They usually send their notifications out all at once in previous years anyway. I was thinking maybe I'm on an unofficial waitlist, but there's an official waitlist, so that seems unlikely. And then I start to get my hopes up because there were only two admits and they were by phone rather than their usual email... but I can't imagine they'd be sitting on a batch of acceptances since rejections went out 10 days ago. (And I've obsessively checked all of my spam, promotion, etc. folders, so I know it didn't slip by me.) I know it's pure conjecture, but any thoughts on this?

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 hours ago, c11m07 said:

I have been remarkably zen the last week or two, but not knowing about Stanford is getting to me. I see two acceptances by phone Jan 30th/31st (when they don't usually notify by phone), 11 rejections Feb 2nd/3rd, two waitlists Feb 6th/7th... and I've heard nothing. They usually send their notifications out all at once in previous years anyway. I was thinking maybe I'm on an unofficial waitlist, but there's an official waitlist, so that seems unlikely. And then I start to get my hopes up because there were only two admits and they were by phone rather than their usual email... but I can't imagine they'd be sitting on a batch of acceptances since rejections went out 10 days ago. (And I've obsessively checked all of my spam, promotion, etc. folders, so I know it didn't slip by me.) I know it's pure conjecture, but any thoughts on this?

 

This is a strange circumstance!  I suppose it's possible that they did a wack of rejections and were sorting through the remainder, but I agree it's unlikely that they'd contact people on an official waitlist before contacting the admits.  Maybe wait a few more days and then send an email?

 

Personally, I am regretting only applying to 5 programs.  Why didn't I hedge my bets more!?!?

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

9 minutes ago, songofgallifrey said:

agh i have been thinking the same thing! it seemed like a good number at the time, but now i'm doubting myself.

hindsight and all that.

But, hey! I see you have an acceptance!  Congrats!!! 1 is really all you need, though more are, of course, always welcome. I haven't officially heard back from anywhere but 2 of the programs admitted other students so I'm assuming the silence = rejection. Blaaaahhhhhh. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

This website uses cookies to ensure you get the best experience on our website. See our Privacy Policy and Terms of Use