ilyosha

Oh well. Looks like I'm headed elsewhere then. Honestly, I'm just happy to finally get closure, so I really appreciate you guys filling me in. Hopefully JHU won't drag out rejection notices past early next week. Best of luck to everyone still waiting on schools, and everyone making decisions! I can't tell you all how much I've appreciated all of the information and encouragement you guys have provided throughout this process.

Honestly, I am a little confused about what's going on with Hopkins. There were a couple of acceptances posted to the main site yesterday. I'm positive they're genuine, but it would be nice to get some confirmation here in the forums. They also seem to be CP and American subfields, so it may be that they're trickling out by subfield, or it may just be that we're hitting a weekend at the end of the admissions season so people have been slow to claim.

So I am always curious exactly how this type of reasoning is supposed to apply in concrete cases. What is one supposed to make of (a) great subfield faculties in otherwise less well-ranked departments; (b) a strong level of confidence in your own abilities; (c) the fact that very prestigious departments function through the rigorous enforcement of certain norms and practices which can honestly be quite draining to anyone without a very particular type of attitude/character, and which serve little significant intellectual purpose. (I am totally committed to this latter proposition but you might as well just ignore it if you disagree.) I'll just take the three cases I know best: Notre Dame, Brown, Johns Hopkins in political theory. I know that there are some people on here who have been accepted to e.g. Brown and Michigan for theory. Would that person simply be incorrect to choose Brown over Michigan? Let's say (hypothetically) that person's biggest intellectual influence is Bonnie Honig and s/he really wants to go work with her; s/he has confidence that s/he is hard-working, driven and intelligent so can work on publishing consistently as a grad student even if that means overcoming whatever potential gap there may be in training or rigor; and perhaps Providence is a much better move because his/her SO will be significantly more comfortable in Providence. What I guess I am asking is: Would a PhD from Brown perhaps lead to people being condescending to him/her, regardless of the merits of his/her individual candidacy? Or in even worse cases, even after getting a TT job? If so, would it ever be possible to return into the mainstream academic fold? Or would it be feasible to get good jobs in top universities in Canada, UK, Australia, etc? Kinda long, so thanks to anyone who reads this!

Yeah, that's why it's my #1 choice! I think it's basically perfect if you know what you're getting into and you know it's what you want to do more than anything else you could do with your life. But if that's not somebody's thing they would definitely do better to go somewhere else. Also, don't know if I'm a total weirdo, but the more I write about why I love Hopkins the more I fear jinxing myself into rejection.

My feeling is that it's always best to continue with "Professor X" until someone explicitly tells you to address them by their first name. Although I am far more conservative on this than everyone I know, I think it simply never hurts to stay on "Professor" until told otherwise.

^ For convenience I will just quote that here so people don't have to dig it up.

I have felt this way before, and while I think seeking treatment is absolutely the right answer, which you should absolutely follow through on, it can also feel like a very unsatisfactory, cookie-cutter response to your quite legitimate feelings. So I just want to take a moment to respond to the content of what you have written as honestly as I can. One really pivotal philosophical move which it seems like you're making--which is then getting fed into the nature of the responses which you are receiving (e.g. from ArtVandelay)--is to think of the meaning and purpose of your life in terms of efficiency and productiveness. It is at least worth remarking that this way of thinking has only really became dominant with the rise of capitalism, and the sense that our minds and bodies are themselves resources to be maximized. It's precisely the phenomenon which gives way to modern alienation. Just because your efforts have failed to be recognized by a few committees in this very overwhelming and difficult process absolutely does not make any aspect of your life pointless. The problem, it seems, gleaning from your post, is that you have no one to discuss these matters with. And that really is troubling. It seems like you were hoping that getting into a graduate program would deliver you into a community of equals with whom you could discuss these things, which you feel that you currently lack. But I just want to say--I hope that the responses from so many on this board have shown you just how many people there are out there who do care, who are willing to discuss, who do wish you every success. And that is why you would do well to seek treatment, so that you can consult with a professional who can help you manage and organize this aspect of your life, so that you can get back on track. Anyway, I really hope that was helpful, and I'm sorry if it's not. Please PM me any time! I'm genuinely rooting for you.