gooniesneversaydie

It's like you all know me. I tried to tell a supervisor (who worked at a university of all places) what constituted medieval literature, and I was like, "Oh, you know, Chaucer and such." And her response was, "what's that?" *face palm* My favorite response when I tell people what I study, though, is: *crickets* "oh...um, why?" Um! Because it's AWESOME! Arthuriana is life!

Out of reactions, but solidarity! Sugary, sweet solidarity.

Thank you!!

Another day of silence. Another day of cheesecake. (For those keeping up at home, I'm now on cheesecake number 3! * The Count's voice* Yes 3! 3 Cheesecakes! Ah ah ah! 10 rejections. Count them 10! Ah ah aaaaaaahhhhhhhhh ?)

I have a special place in my heart for Americanists (one of my undergrad mentors is one), so hop on the nerd bandwagon!

Spoke to two friends last night lamenting about the current situation. Neither understands the world of academia, but were supportive nonetheless. However, when I explained that one possible reason for rejection is that another medievalist was chosen over me, one friend shouts, "Wait! God! There are more of you??? Who the f**k studies that?? Who else chooses to study medieval sh*t??" Then, my other eloquent friend shouts, "Nerds, that's who! You should start a nerd school, so the rest of the nerds can attend nerd school!" And there we have it, friends. The origin story of how I started my very own "medieval nerd school." All are welcome.

Don't apologize at all, we all feel the same fears on an almost cosmic level. These are tough decisions to work through and we must be brutally honest with ourselves with how far we're willing/able to go. However, I wouldn't tell anyone that all hope is lost. Some of my previous professors have gone so far as to tell me not to get a Phd (not because of my own aptitude, but because of the job market) and some have said go for it, but only if it's fully funded. There are alternatives, however, and I'm in the process of becoming familiar with them myself right now, because I firmly believe in having a plan B, C, and D. You could possibly teach at a community college or a private secondary school (depending on the state), work in publishing, do grant writing for non-profits, or get a post doc (again, those are competitive too). I had a professor who taught at 3 different community colleges as an adjunct, and while that might not be great or realistic for everyone, it's something. I hope you have a strong network you can lean on during these stressful times (you definitely have us!) and gain further insight to help give you some clarity.

I hope we hear something from BU tomorrow. I'll be staring at my phone from dawn to dusk. My partner is from southern Louisiana and I'm temped to ask him how much he knows about voodoo. If I need to drive to Boston to get my hands on a stuffed BU mascot to pray/sacrifice to, I'll do it. Desperate times, ya'll.

One of my cats went on a massive puke parade this morning, and as I looked down at a large expelled hairball, I could not help but identify with the hairball. Same, hairball. Same. Tomorrow is going to be an anxiety filled dumpster fire.

I met Betsy Wheeler last year at their welcome weekend for admits and she was an absolute hoot. Lovely and very warm. We went out to eat one night (on Oregon's dime) and I had a blast.

Too true. I've also had profs (some of the most brilliant people I've ever met) say that they had to try several times. One of my Shakespeare profs from the community college I attended said she applied during a "banger" year for a humanities PhD (late 80s/early 90s, I believe) and couldn't get in anywhere. She decided not to reapply, but was able to secure a tenured-ish position at the community college with her MA and seems to be quite happy. She was the first to warn me that the stereotypical professorship (tenure, office, on-campus courses, etc) is rapidly disappearing. So much has been replaced with adjuncts and online courses. However, I refuse to give up the dream regardless of what the reality may be, because for me, there really is nothing else.

Looking over the past years' info, it seems that they make phone calls on Mondays to those accepted and send out rejections the following Friday. So, hopefully Monday, since it's the last this month? I'm actually terrified to hear back from this one. I'd almost *almost* prefer the limbo to getting a 9th rejection, especially from this school.

If it makes you happy, then yes! If it doesn't, maybe stick a candle in the muffin? Or wrap whatever's left in a box and open it like a present. "Oh! A half eaten bacon muffin!? I shouldn't have!"

So happy for you! You better treat yo'self to something for these outstanding accomplishments!!

No, I definitely wouldn't worry! The profs I've spoken to have said that finding a TT position is so competitive no matter what. Also, that it depends on the type of university. One prof said that high-ranked, research intensive universities will give preference to those who come from a top 10/top 20, whereas teaching universities may not. However, I have also been told that it's the relationships built between you and your diss. director/committee. And that their letters of rec, the networking they help you do, and their work/reputation in the field, is what is extremely important.

I can definitely sympathize with the mental strain of doing this again next year. My first cycle (last year) was a mess, so I'm terrified of making the wrong choices again this time. And my only choice is ranked at 57, so that makes me nervous, even though I know it's not the end all.

So for those of us who have one acceptance (I think @spikeseagulls @jm6394 @tinymica that I see today) - what is everyone thinking at this point in time? Take the acceptance and run should no more come? Or try again next cycle? I know it's premature to assume, but at least for me, I really don't think I'll be getting in elsewhere. My one small hope still exists with BU, but Penn and Rutgers? Fuggedaboutit.

Pants are definitely fitting tighter from all the stress eating.

I had a dream that I was accepted to BU last night. It was such a realistic dream, and when I woke up, I felt disappointment as if I've been rejected. I can't even have a break during sleep anymore. Oh cruel Fate, when wilt thou weary be? When satisfied with tormenting me? What have I e're design'd, but thou hast crost? All that I wisht to gain by Thee, I've lost.

Out of reactions, but let me just say, thank God for ya'll and this forum. I love being a sad sack amongst other sad sacks! Bless you Gradcafe community. Bless you.

One of my cats' name is Coraline The book and movie are both legit.

I'll be with you all in spirit as I drown my sorrows in buffalo wings and fried pickles. And you best believe I'll be getting that cheesecake tomorrow when I go grocery shopping. As for a movie - I LOVE Coraline. Stop motion makes my heart happy. 10/10. Also, I second HP&TSS.

Yep. Rejection from Brown. This one definitely hurts the most. Curse words. So many curse words. Welp. Guess I'll be buying yet another cheesecake. God dammit.

Amen! I can NOT wait for February to be over. Everyone said January was neverending, but good lord in heaven is this dragging. This leap year malarkey is for the birds.

Do you know, (since we've been discussing relationships) my first rejection of the season was from a school that I really, really wanted to attend, and when I received the rejection email, it truly felt as if I had been dumped. Many of the same emotions surfaced and I found the similarities rather odd. So, I went to Target and bought an entire cheesecake and binged shitty reality TV (Vanderpump Rules, fyi) and cried my heart out for about a week. It was awful but cathartic in a cliche way. So, if going for a walk, run, making something creative, or focusing on school/jobs doesn't work for distracting oneself from the shit show that is waiting/deciding, I highly recommend cheesecake, Vanderpump Rules, and crying.