HyacinthMacaw

I totally hear you! If it weren't for this site, I would be even more of a nervous wreck! Makes me wonder how I would have fared in the days of dial-up when I would be waiting 10 minutes to refresh the results page. Needless to say, notifications from Penn State and Maryland becoming overdue if the timelines of past years are any guide.

Yes, I can imagine this process is nerve-wracking for boyfriends/girlfriends/spouses as well. Coping with disappointment of such magnitude can be challenging, and it would seem to put loved ones in a familiar bind: Talk them through it with as much empathy as possible or just let them deal with it alone? I always like to err on the side of the former--attempts at compassion rarely make things worse, even if they may not always make them better, either. I think situations like this call for lots of emotional validation. I remember from a clinical psychology course that it was always important for therapists to acknowledge the emotional experience of their clients. Simple things like "You must be feeling awful, I know how important this was for you," or "I would feel upset, too," can really make a difference. Even just a good, long hug can work. If I were in your boyfriend's situation, I would hope to lean on my girlfriend for that kind of emotional support, and I would be sure to reciprocate it when the need arises. Participating in activities together (I like cooking, personally) beforehand and after the fact might help build resilience and accumulate positive emotions. All the best to you, your boyfriend, and everyone else with significant others.

Cool, thanks very much! I just PMed you.

Congrats, that must feel great! Time to reward yourself--you deserve it after working so hard! Heck, I think everyone deserves to reward themselves at this point!

I can't resist http://www.cuteoverload.com and http://www.snuzzy.com. http://icanhascheezburger.com/ is great, too. Hooray for cute animals!

Thanks, I understand now. Those are some great-looking apartments in Boulder--for any price, not to mention for only $772!

I totally hear you--it does raise a red flag. At the same time, he extended the courtesy of calling me to alert me about the interview, and we had a brief conversation about our convergent research interests. The interview itself was simply a prolonged version of that. If I'm lucky enough to receive an offer, I'll be sure to inquire further about the degree of my POI's involvement with his grad students; from what I've heard so far, however, face-to-face time with him will not be a problem. That highlights the importance of ensuring your POI's mentoring style suits you. It's probably a good idea to ask whether our POIs follow an apprenticeship, hands-on model or an independent, laissez-faire model. Of course, even hands-on mentors can't define your research interests for you or identify what you're passionate about, though they may present you with some ideas, a loose agenda, or even unfinished data sets.

Might I ask you to elaborate about Penn State? I was under the impression that the cost of living there is fairly low. Am I mistaken? Thanks!

I won't pretend that I'm at all qualified to answer this question since I haven't completed the interview process and can't speak to my success, but I'm inclined to stress the value of fit, i.e. convergence of specific research interests. If I've published multiple papers that advance crossed categorization theory but have little interest in, say, social dominance theory (or if my experience can't even be construed to have anything to do with the latter), then social dominance theorists aren't going to be as interested in me as someone with less experience but who has promising ideas about social dominance theory. Every grad student and professor with whom I've spoken has said that high compatibility gets you much farther than generic excellence alone. If you have both, that's great, but I think it's fallacious to assume that people can gain admission to competitive programs just because they have published when their publications don't even pique the interest of faculty. So contact your POIs to discuss their current and planned research projects! Then read their work and brainstorm original ways to extend their work/theories meaningfully. And continue working on research that's relevant to what your POIs do. But seriously, please don't beat yourself up if you can't publish; most Ph.D. students are lucky to publish once or twice before they graduate. In all, I really do believe that linking your research experience with your POI's interests will prove far more fruitful than just looking for a magical combination of years in a lab, presentations, publications, etc. You're not applying for tenure; you're seeking a good match!

I heard from my POI only yesterday (Tuesday); he said to expect a phone interview, which is scheduled for tomorrow, conducted by some of his grad students. I believe two other people on the short list will be interviewed in similar fashion. There is space for only one new student in my POI's lab. Given that I heard from my POI so recently, it's quite possible that your POI is still reviewing applications. Case in point: Yale's application was also due December 15th, and not one social psych applicant has heard from them, at least according to the results page and this thread.

I second that! You deserve credit for your initiative. Not sure if there's an emoticon for "You've come so far already; keep the hope alive because you've definitely got the spirit to make it." Maybe this would do:

That I love birds (an ornithophiliac) and secretly can't wait to see the new movie "Rio" about macaws and other tropical birds?

Hello everyone, Just wondering if there are any folks out there who can speak to the veracity/falsity of the idea that someone can be rejected because he or she is too strong of an applicant. Ostensibly the logic is that these applicants will inevitably decline an offer of admission and accept one from a "better" program, but somehow I don't buy it. Maybe it happens to candidates to professional schools (medicine, law, business), but I'm not sure it happens to Ph.D. applicants. What are your thoughts? Thanks! P.S.: Just want to make clear that I myself don't think I'm overqualified--I've been rejected because I'm underqualified, plain and simple.

I think it's a great program, at least for my specific interests in intergroup relations. I applied even though my POI informed me beforehand that she was unlikely to accept new students during this application cycle. In hindsight I regret that move; I was foolish enough to think that I could somehow slip in. I didn't have outside funding, either. I won't be surprised to be rejected. Best of luck to everyone.

[Hanging up the phone after my phone interview]: "You know the feeling you might get before a first date, and you're all excited and amped up with giddy anticipation, and you're certain this has got to be the person with whom you want to spend the rest of your life, and then you meet this person and you're like, 'Is this all you've got?'" "You mean, you're feeling totally deflated?" "Yeah, like I'm wondering 'Why the heck was I getting all excited in the first place?'" "Looks can be deceiving!" "What a disappointment!" "Makes me regret ever inviting him to interview in the first place. Leaves a terrible aftertaste. Pfft! Ack! Ugh!" "What's the most excoriating thing we can say to him when we reject him?" "'Find a speech therapist, boy!'" "Or 'Your children will by pumping gas for my children.'" "Or this: 'You'll never be worthy of life or love!'" "I love this!" [Diabolical laughter continues] Has anyone else felt extremely concerned that they built up adcoms' expectations, only to disappoint adcoms during interviews?

SocialPsychErin, I hear you--I've lost more than a thousand dollars in application fees and have little to show for it save for a receding hairline and 30 extra pounds. Didn't know I would turn out like my father so soon.

I'm also still waiting to hear from Maryland. Let's hope they contact us with good news any day now.

I hear you--I tried to make sure my recommenders were comfortable beforehand with submitting letters to 19 schools. Still, I think I spent a lot of "capital," as it were, eroding my relationship with my recommenders (3 out of 4 of them had already written their recommendations for a master's program to which I had previously applied, so I don't believe this affected the overall quality). I did vet all programs for fit, and though some programs are better fits than others, all programs have faculty doing work that converges with my research interests. (I'm interested in prejudice broadly speaking but I'm also interested in benevolent sexism/benevolent stereotypes and contact theory more specifically). Also, I thought that applying to a range of programs would offer me an array of choices if I were fortunate enough to receive offers from a few of them. And of course, Ph.D. programs are extraordinarily competitive! I didn't want to later regret not applying to more schools that were good fits. Indeed, research fit was my only criterion when selection which schools to apply to--I didn't consider location, cost of living, etc. (Thought it would be wise to consider those things when weighing offers.)

Hey folks, I applied to 19 Ph.D. programs and expect to receive rejection letters from many more of them than I would like. How about we brainstorm a few ways of channeling our frustrations and using our rejection letters as our artistic medium? Here's my list: -Giving rejection letters to my pet bird Jerry to shred to his little heart's content -Shredding them to a pulp, forming paper mache, then molding into an enlarged middle finger with an appropriate caption, then sending finger to admissions office that spurned you -Good for fishwrap -Light them on fire, let them slowly burn -Exercise in denial: white-out your name, put in someone else's -Those cute little umbrellas that you get with drinks -Exercise in denial #2: Cut out each individual letter, rearrange them so that the letter reads that you've been accepted -Mobius strips (they have only one side....whoa) -A highly ineffective method of birth control -Forward to Santa -Hole-punched paper confetti -Nothing; just laugh at how programs actually spent money on mailing you a rejection letter when they could have just emailed you That's all for now. Good luck to everyone!

And then they make paper boats out of our applications and send them out to float on the San Antonio River! Come to think of it, for every rejection letter I get I would like to do something like that.

Just stumbled upon this news that the late Jack Brehm of Kansas gave $2.2 million to the psych department to improve undergraduate and graduate training, especially in social psych. http://www.news.ku.edu/2010/september/7/brehm.shtml Anyone know of other programs in healthy financial shape? (Though of course, a professor who lands a lucrative grant will be able to recruit new grad students even if the university at large cuts back.)

Thanks for the info! When I emailed Diane Mackie, she said that she hoped to take a new student this year, but that this was "completely dependent on the sorry state of the UC's funding". I guess the cuts have been more severe than anyone really anticipated. Which is sad, really, because UCSB has a great department and its productivity will likely decline with less money to fund grad new grad students.

I also applied to Penn State, and I haven't heard from them yet. Let's keep our fingers crossed!

Light my college diploma on fire Homer Simpson style! Woo-hoo!

I'm not applying to CUNY, but I've had the same thing happen to me at several schools. I emailed POIs twice last year to ask them if they were accepting new students, but I never received even an acknowledgment from them. As a result, I had to apply (and pay hundreds of dollars in application fees) even though I was never certain that POIs were taking students. A quick "No, I can't take another student" would have saved everyone a lot of trouble.