mandarin.orange

POI did end up calling Monday and apologized for dropping the ball over the weekend, and we had a good chat. Thanks for the reminders to be patient. I have to remember that similar happened with now-boyfriend and when I met my current roommate as well - in the beginning stages, I had to initiate contact at a time when I thought I'd left the ball in their court. Both situations have worked out fantastic! Sometimes I wonder if reading that (in)famous book "He's Just Not That Into You" has done more harm in my life than good.

Just to clarify, he mentioned being super-busy Mon and Tues, and traveling on Wed...which is why he asked to speak over the weekend - meaning this weekend past, and that was when I didn't hear anything.

Had an admit to my top school...the department sounds great; they are very active in exactly the research I want to do, with loads of opportunities for me to beef up on skills and courses I think would be useful for the later job market. When I initially emailed the POI, he responded enthusiastically, and at great length, in less than an hour! Subsequent emails (about 3 more throughout the whole application/admission process) were equally enthusiastic, complimenting my great record. I am waiting to hear on funding and we mentioned a visit to the campus, and perhaps speaking on the phone in the meantime. I mentioned I could free up some time during weeknights next week, and I received a curt reply that he was pressed for time Mon-Tues, traveling again Wed, and could we speak over the weekend? I responded that Sunday would be fine; just tell me a ballpark time so I could be at home. No reply. And, not a word today. I've gone about my life, errands, exercise, prep for school tomorrow as usual, but always aware of the phone in the background and wondering a little..."hey, WTF?" Is this a sign of things to come? It has me questioning if I should agree to work under this person. I've seen plenty of friends experience bad advisor-advisee situations during my masters, so I've gone into the application process a bit guarded and on the lookout for signs that an advisor would be difficult/aloof/absent/crazy. How can you tell someone won't be a great advisor? Who has seen telling "red flags" in the past, and at what stage - i.e. during the initial correspondence, or visit, or discussing with current students?

No, so long as you followed basic email etiquette, were polite, not unreasonable, etc.

A Mac may be more expensive, but they will LAST. Apple offers Educator's (and students too, I imagine) discounts, and you can get 0% financing...which is how I upgraded mine old PowerBook last year. The old PowerBook, I'd had since my M.S. program 6 years prior, and I used and abused that computer everyday for research purposes (data crunching, writing, drafting illustrations), I used it summers at a state park where I was a grant writer and did map and illustration drafting, and it had all my personal music, photos, and finances. I am an overworked, underpaid HS teacher and definitely found it affordable. My school gave me an Acer less than 2 years ago and it is a P.O.S. for sure...incredibly slow, sporadically picks up wireless, doesn't like certain DVDs, etc.

I got a rejection last week. Strangely, after obsessing so much and checking my status online compulsively since the day I sent it in, the actual notification moment really caught me off-guard when I was preoccupied with other things. It was the most polite, to-the-point email I could imagine. I can't even get some cheap laughs making fun of the grammar. I felt a sudden compulsion to go for a walk down the street. I live within walking distance of a dog bar. I wanted nothing more than to go hang out with some DOGS. Sadly, they are still closed for the winter on weekdays, so I called up and convinced my BF to meet me for pizza with his doggie.

Meh...somehow that seems too much effort (for them). Does anyone else see the "DeVry University" ads scrolling across the bottom when this plays?? Oh, the irony.

Apparently this was a rejection letter: Too bad one of my schools let me know via the polite "thanks, but no thanks" email...leaving me with nothing tangible to rip up.

My other (not so) favorite expression, usually dispensed by the same people spouting the "you will get in, how could they not want you?!?!" drivel: "Wait, WHAT? You didn't? Well...THEIR loss!"

When I did a visiting weekend for my M.S., I didn't imbibe much at the dinner, per se, but heading out to the local dive after with current grad students was definitely encouraged. A prof or two came. I liked the social vibe and tight-knit feeling I got from the current grad school population, and it was one of the reasons I chose the school. May not have been a top tier for my field, but I was mostly happy while there, and therefore, productive. It was the first of many memorable dinners + drinking events - definitely a priority for the department. When it came time to do field research, there were many steak + beer dinners out at the end of a long day in the cold white north. I wonder if to drink or not to drink depends on the discipline. This was for a geology program. A geologist who refuses a drink (esp. beer) is generally regarded as an oddity and someone who is not fun.

Hm, what type of British accent...Cockney?

I wholeheartedly disagree re. Charlotte, having lived here since 2004. From day 1, it has struck me as THE least biker/pedestrian-friendly place I have ever lived. I moved from Cincinnati, where I lived close to the University, was an avid cyclist on their many rails-to-trails paths, and had gone for bouts of several months at a time without a car. Once in NC, my bike gathered dust, I eventually donated it, and have moved on to other sports and activities. Motorists here are not used to sharing the road and tend to buzz or run off cyclists with nary a care; some are outright aggressive. A couple close friends have witnessed horrible accidents to one of their group during triathelon training rides. There is ONE light rail, and it doesn't even service the university area. It's primary use seems to be to shuttle Panthers fans uptown for game day. To get anywhere by bus, you must inevitably go to the transit station uptown first (a high crime area...a friend of mine was mugged at gunpoint two years ago). There is no direct line from the southeast-southwest part of town; you must go through uptown. A bus services the airport, but this is generally not used except by food court employees. I tried it once and was the only person with luggage on board. Everybody drives. This is the proud home of NASCAR, after all!

This depends on the rigor of your program, and your advisor's expectations. Try to source that out as much as possible from current grad students and your possible-advisor during visits and interviews. Ask lots of questions. For my part, if I could not answer "yes" to the two questions above, I would not be interested in such a program. I dropped one program once I read that PhDs were required to fully prepare 2 completely different research project proposals, present them, and have a committee decide which one to focus on for the next 3 years. That, to me, just seems an extraneous amount of prep work for something that gets dropped. Quality of life and balance are both important.

You will DEFINITELY have this demographic in class, so take everything you read with a grain of salt. Also, if there are more lax TAs around who simply tell the answers to kids, let them out of lab 1-2 hours early, etc. that word gets around and your students are already coming into lab with a chip on their shoulder. The first time I taught lab sections, I was surprised by how juvenile and downright mean some of the comments could be (e.g. "she SUCKED.") Some took a little decompression to actually see they had a point, and think of how I could change things (e.g. "she seemed bored to be here"). Note that 6 years later, I still remember them word-for-word. Developing good teaching demeanor, and learning not to take these things personally, are both skills that can take years to learn. I know people into their 3rd, 4th, 5th year as professional lecturers and tenure-track profs who still dread their evaluations b/c of the snide comments from the above-mentioned demographic. I am in my 6th year teaching HS and finally began getting consistent positive feedback from peers, admin and the kids by about year 4. If you actively try to improve each time around, things get better. It DOES help to actively circulate during labs, esp. if you don't want word-for-word similarity between partners and group members, and strive to get them to think for themselves.

Schools may have a page/field at the end where you are allowed to write a supplement. The prompt is pretty open-ended, like "tell us anything you feel will enhance your application or has not been covered," blah blah. I've only heard of being used to (positively and briefly) explain any resume gaps or GPA lapses, but I wonder if there you could attach your PS. For one of my schools, I had to write a Personal History Statement in addition to the SOP (many of the UC schools require this). What is it you are wanting to include beyond the usual academic background, life/career-shaping experiences, relevant experience, future goals that the SOP covers? Why do you need/want it to be long?

I found both of these extremely helpful: http://www-personal.umich.edu/~mooreks/sop.html http://unlikelygrad.wordpress.com/2009/12/31/a-winning-sop/ Their own SOPs were for very different disciplines (I see you are in Classics), but in the first site, I think she has great advice that would apply to just about anyone writing an SOP.

I spent $325. For those hitting 4 figures, I am very curious to know...WHY? Why 10 schools? Why 12? What precluded you from narrowing it down to, say, 3 or 4? Genuinely curious about this.

I think it would be great, and inspiring. Of course, I will be non-traditional myself (32 upon starting in the fall). I would probably gravitate toward you...many of the close friends I've made in my current city tend to be older. Now, one poster had mentioned the 20-something "complaining of the privileged" - I remember that well from my M.S. program and was fully immersed and a part of it. Lots of interdating and gossip went on among the students in their 20s. Many of them could take one offhand comment from their advisor or a student SO deeply personally and not just ignore it or brush it off...amusing that the same crowd often considers taking time away from grad studies for work, jobs or having kids as "distractors." There were also plenty of older graduate students (and undergrads!) at the time...sadly, I don't remember getting to know them extensively, but they were quite focused, doing amazing work, had less angsty/complicated relationships with their advisors, and often some of the best teachers and TAs. I look forward to being part of that crowd!

I applied to only 2 schools. More than that seemed a bit unfocused and extraneous (my college search was like this). I had planned on only applying to the one, but drummed up some great correspondence with a potential advisor at a second who would be (at least on paper) amazing to work with. I'm 32 and would be relocating to the west coast (from the southeast), so all the planets - advisor match, funding, research, program, quality of life - need to to align for me to commit the next 4 years to a PhD. I'm at a point where living like a student again for 4 years and losing (or delaying) key income-building, home-buying years in my 30s would not be undertaken lightly. Glad to have found this thread and other likeminded folks. Upon joining this site, I was a bit surprised with the tendency here to make "checklist" signatures with lists of schools applied, acceptances, rejections. Some have upward of a dozen schools listed! If nothing else, I made my search very focused because I didn't want to spend $700-900 in app fees!

Control freak