Feel the same?

[Spec]

Hi guys/girls , what do you do to relieve the tension and anxiety? Honestly, this waiting game is killing me! I applied for a PhD in Math to Utah, Mizzou, Pittsburgh and still haven't heard ANYTHING from them. My profile isn't bad at all but I guess problem is funding since I am an international student and I assume fees are higher? I emailed both departments time ago and got NO response. Am I rejected? Am I waitlisted? Why can't they take 5 minutes to answer? we are all busy but isn't paying a fee enough to at least deserve a quick reply? Do they plan to answer 1 minute before April 15 midnight????

I'm checking my e-mail at least 20 times per day not to mention the application status more than 10 times, I'm mentally ill now. I can't sleep, I have been sleeping 3 hours the past days, I can only fall asleep when I have drank enough wine/scotch otherwise I can't. I'm starting to feel weak and extremely exhausted, not to mention grumpy as hell. Man I don't know what do to do, not even ice cream + wine + tv + exercise can calm me. Any advice/suggestions are greatly appreciated! arghhhhhh, thought I'd share this with you since you are the only ones who can understand me.

Edited March 18, 2010 by Spec

[afritz87]

yoga?

Really though, there's no way to make it easier. Have you emailed/called the departments to inquire about your status?

[Spec]

Just emailed them, no reply at all. Wonder what's going on I hate to feel ignored. A short reply such as "you are on the wailist or you are rejected" will do, but no, they prefer to ignore you. Why?

[FoggyAnhinga]

to relieve the tension of waiting, when I'm not going to classes or studying, i watch movies, work out, hang out w/ friends to chat about random topics, play online games, etc.

i've also had several dreams in past few days, where i got acceptance to my top choice EXCEPT it was a dream (though it was SO REALISTIC that it scared me). i was so annoyed i punched my mattress 15 times.

[nycrican2]

Hi guys/girls , what do you do to relieve the tension and anxiety? Honestly, this waiting game is killing me! I applied for a PhD in Math to Utah, Mizzou, Pittsburgh and still haven't heard ANYTHING from them. My profile isn't bad at all but I guess problem is funding since I am an international student and I assume fees are higher? I emailed both departments time ago and got NO response. Am I rejected? Am I waitlisted? Why can't they take 5 minutes to answer? we are all busy but isn't paying a fee enough to at least deserve a quick reply? Do they plan to answer 1 minute before April 15 midnight????

I'm checking my e-mail at least 20 times per day not to mention the application status more than 10 times, I'm mentally ill now. I can't sleep, I have been sleeping 3 hours the past days, I can only fall asleep when I have drank enough wine/scotch otherwise I can't. I'm starting to feel weak and extremely exhausted, not to mention grumpy as hell. Man I don't know what do to do, not even ice cream + wine + tv + exercise can calm me. Any advice/suggestions are greatly appreciated! arghhhhhh, thought I'd share this with you since you are the only ones who can understand me.

I am right there with you on this situation, slowly losing my sanity. I have never had any trouble sleeping before now but lately I am getting 3 to 4 hours of sleep a night and I have been compulsively checking email. I don't drink so it is not an option. Will we ever get through this?

Gee, where is my mama when I need her?

[mag]

i've also had several dreams in past few days, where i got acceptance to my top choice EXCEPT it was a dream (though it was SO REALISTIC that it scared me). i was so annoyed i punched my mattress 15 times.

I hear you. I had a dream so vivid that I even saw the signature on the letter. And recognised the name. And knew what time of day it was when I got the letter. When I woke up I grinned like an idiot for a second before I said "Hang on..." *wails* I went on to have a really, really bad day. The only way it could have been worse was to have got the reject from that school on the same day, LOL.

Well, I haven't got it yet. *fingers crossed*

[Babbling Dweeb]

I am right there with you on this situation, slowly losing my sanity. I have never had any trouble sleeping before now but lately I am getting 3 to 4 hours of sleep a night and I have been compulsively checking email. I don't drink so it is not an option. Will we ever get through this?

Gee, where is my mama when I need her?

love it! I calmed down just before March 10th and then I got hyper again. I'm finally calming down a little bit, but still checking my email when I see that there is one unread message. My productivity sucks...watching tv, reading...I find myself daydreaming about the "what ifs".

Hopefully the wait will be over sooner than later for all of us!

[martizzle]

dude, i feel your pain all the word I have received so far hasn't been so good. the only relative good news is that after being rejected by a PhD program, I was asked if I 'would like to be considered for a Masters program.' Now someone on gradcafe said that in his department (slightly off from mine), that meant you were getting in. After emailing that I would like to be considered for the Masters program, I got an email saying: 'I will have your app reviewed by the ad comm.' Now, I'm scared...might even crap my pants

and i applied to like 12 schools...no word from six yet, bad word from 5 and a half (lol)....why do they make us wait? lack of courtesy

[Jennifer]

I'm so glad other people have dreamed about all of this! I had a really vivid dream about getting the letter from my 1st choice and the envelope said congratulations on it and everything. There was also something about me being a finalist for a full scholarship (i applied after the deadline ON PURPOSE) so i knew it was a dream when I woke up, i almost felt like laughing.

[Think_Positive]

I couldn't agree more! For most of February I couldn't eat, because I was making myself so sick to my stomach.... Fortunately(?) I've gotten so many rejections now that most of the suspense is over, and that's settled down. It's just a matter of waiting it out for one more school. But it's the only thing I can think of and everything from sleep to school work to my social life is put off or only gets a fraction of my attention as my thoughts are focused on "Maybe I should go check it now".

And in the same vein, I hate email. While I had to wait for a few snail mail responses, and cursed at those schools for using such a slow delivery method... I am pretty sure the last school replies by email. And for snail mail while I may accomplish nothing all morning until the mail came, once it came for the day I knew that was all there was and could have some semblance of a life for the rest of the day. With email, there's no reprieve. I see stories on this forum of people getting emails at 10 pm, at 6 am, on Sundays.... Now I can't get a moments rest. As much as I hated the delay of mail, the spontaneity of email is making my life even harder.

[HFSteph]

Ugh. I hate this waiting game. I mean I do have one acceptance - so that is a definite relief. It is my 2nd choice school - so not too shabby. I just haven't heard from my first school and am tired of waiting. I just would like to know where I will be in August so I can start planning and making arrangements (housing, moving my horse or finding someone to lease him, moving in general, loans, etc, etc.).

Hang in there. I am imagining it will all be over soon in the next couple months.

[Jennifer]

i got my first answer today via email...well via my non-stop website checking and then later came an email that said the exact same thing...'due to the competitive nature of our applicant pool, we can not offer you admission at this time'

i am SO INCREDIBLY relieved to know how this feels. it doesn't feel great but it doesn't feel like i want to jump off a building either. and that's okay because that's life.

tomorrow is another day, i will wake up and watch mindless tv while I drink coffee and my stomach will flip when I hear the mailman and maybe something will come.

i'm starting to slowly consider what i'll do if it's a NO across the board. I have a lot to think about because getting my master's was the next step, how I wanted to start a career in education and/or writing.

but it feels good, having a weight off my shoulders now. i feel MORE optimistic if that makes sense. my parents (whom i live with again at 25, ugh!) want to know what i'll do, if i have a plan, if i have options but as long as i'm feeling this way, i can't let that pressure get to me. "que sera sera, whatever will be...will be, the future's not ours to see" RIGHT?

.....................................................this could all change tomorrow if "dream school" says no and i wake up from all of this.

[ootg]

I was just chatting about this waiting and not knowing with my boss over lunch. At least he has been sympathetic, and he knows that I've been putting in good work. So, I feel that I may be able to work myself into a more permanent position if things don't work out on the grad school front.