nz1996 Posted February 21, 2019 Posted February 21, 2019 more than a month ago I had an interview with a professor who told me that I was his best applicant and the interview went really well. At the end of the interview, he asked me if there is anything else I want to say and I told him that I am applying to this university with my partner and I will attend this university only if my partner is accepted there too. As a result, the professor has not sent me any offers yet! a couple of weeks ago I sent him an email and asked him about the status of my application and he did not answer. last week I broke up with my partner? Now I want to tell the professor that I have changed my mind and I do not care if my partner gets accepted at that university or not. Should I do this? how should I announce this to the professor? My partner may not get accepted at that university at all and I guess the professor is not willing to give me an offer unless he finds out that my partner is accepted.
Ternwild Posted February 21, 2019 Posted February 21, 2019 2 minutes ago, nz1996 said: more than a month ago I had an interview with a professor who told me that I was his best applicant and the interview went really well. At the end of the interview, he asked me if there is anything else I want to say and I told him that I am applying to this university with my partner and I will attend this university only if my partner is accepted there too. As a result, the professor has not sent me any offers yet! a couple of weeks ago I sent him an email and asked him about the status of my application and he did not answer. last week I broke up with my partner? Now I want to tell the professor that I have changed my mind and I do not care if my partner gets accepted at that university or not. Should I do this? how should I announce this to the professor? My partner may not get accepted at that university at all and I guess the professor is not willing to give me an offer unless he finds out that my partner is accepted. No you should leave the professor alone and wait to see the results. Nothing you can do. Coming off as begging or flip-floppity will only look bad on you as a candidate. Also, sorry about your breakup. Hopefully it was mutual. nz1996 1
crazycheese8 Posted February 21, 2019 Posted February 21, 2019 I disagree with the comment above, I think you should DEFINITELY update the professor. Think about what you told them: "I absolutely will only attend this program if this other person gets admitted". That is a pretty strong statement and could really hold back an acceptance for you. Here's what I would write: ____________________________________________ Subject: Update to Application Dear Professor X, Thank you again for a wonderful conversation last month, I am still very excited about the Y program! At the end of our interview, I mentioned that I would only be able to attend Z school if my partner were able to attend as well. Due to some personal changes, this is no longer the case. I wanted to update you with this new information in case it is relevant in any way to the admissions process. Best, nz1996 nz1996, LizKay and scthorne 1 2
crazycheese8 Posted February 21, 2019 Posted February 21, 2019 It's also worth mentioning that it may be too late to undo this, and it's possible they may have already admitted their second choice. In the future, I would be really careful about making demands like this! nz1996, historygeek and yagirlhannah 1 2
nz1996 Posted February 21, 2019 Author Posted February 21, 2019 (edited) As I recall the professor finished our interview with this exact sentence:"Thanks for informing me so I found out that you either will come to our school with your partner or none of you will come" Edited February 21, 2019 by nz1996
nz1996 Posted February 21, 2019 Author Posted February 21, 2019 (edited) 48 minutes ago, crazycheese8 said: It's also worth mentioning that it may be too late to undo this, and it's possible they may have already admitted their second choice. In the future, I would be really careful about making demands like this! Yes, it may be already too late but I think there is still a chance. The professor told me that I was his "best applicant"! If I was the kinda careful person, I would have been more careful when choosing a boyfriend :))) Edited February 21, 2019 by nz1996
Ternwild Posted February 21, 2019 Posted February 21, 2019 3 hours ago, crazycheese8 said: It's also worth mentioning that it may be too late to undo this, and it's possible they may have already admitted their second choice. In the future, I would be really careful about making demands like this! This really the point I was trying to make. nz1996 1
crazycheese8 Posted February 21, 2019 Posted February 21, 2019 2 hours ago, nz1996 said: If I was the kinda careful person, I would have been more careful when choosing a boyfriend :))) It's fine to not be so careful choosing a boyfriend Be careful about staking something like a graduate school acceptance on any relationship, let alone one that has the potential to end. If you search these forums, even married couples are advised not to sell their acceptances as a definite package deal. It's super risky. I really do hope you have the ability to undo this! Good luck! nz1996 1
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