A cautionary tale

[studentaffairsgrad]

Just wanted to throw this out there for people who are contemplating who to get to write their LORs...

I got three people to write my LORs who, while they didn't have extremely prestigious titles, knew me very well both inside and outside the classroom. The letters were amazing, lengthy, and spoke well of my skills and me as a person. I feel like they were a big reason I got accepted into my top choice.

I had a friend applying to the same programs as I. Instead of choosing people who knew her work well, she picked people who knew little of her, but had more impressive titles (for example, instead of getting her supervisor who knew her well to write an LOR, she got her supervisor's boss to do it, b/c she felt that would look better.)

The guy was a complete moron. She was constantly in his office reminding him to do it. When he finally wrote it, he only wrote her 2 short paragraphs, and the worst part is...he referred to her as "he" instead of "she" all throughout the letter. She ended up catching it, thank goodness, and made him re-write the letter. The other 2 people she picked wrote crappy recs too, b/c they barely knew her. It was like pulling teeth for her to get them to get their letters in. She didn't get into the programs she wanted.

I would say to pick people who know you very well, and if you ask someone and sense that they are less than enthusiastic about it, screw them and get someone else. Their lack of enthusiasm will show through in the LOR.

[MoJingly]

Good advice!

I will also add that, as prejudice as it might sound, it is really important to get your letters from somebody with a PhD/MD/JD... this comes straight from the head of my department who reads about 920847573 applications every year.

Edited May 26, 2011 by MoJingly

[Neuronista]

I would say to pick people who know you very well, and if you ask someone and sense that they are less than enthusiastic about it, screw them and get someone else. Their lack of enthusiasm will show through in the LOR.

Thank you for the advice!

But what if someone knows me very well but is not so enthusiastic about writing a letter for me?

This is my current supervisor. I am now working as an RA in his lab and he was also my undergrad project advisor. So he does know me very well (+ he is the department chair). However, like your friend, I had to constantly remind him to write the letter, and one was even sent 1 day after the deadline. Therefore, I found someone else to write the letters for the rest of schools I applied to. This other person was my MS program director, who does not know me very well, but was very welcoming. I don't know how good/accurate his letter was, though (he sent it directly through the application website).

Now some programs asked me why hasn't my current supervisor written a letter. What should I do in such a situation?

I'm applying again for Fall 2012, and I'm trying to figure out what to do about this.

Any advice?

[emmm]

I think you really need to make an effort to get the letter from your supervisor -- unless he/she really does not like you (in which case, why are you still in that lab?). Otherwise, it will look very odd and send up red flags. These are busy people. One of my recommenders has been incredibly supportive, and even asked me to send her regular reminder emails. She still sent in most letters right at the deadline and one a week late (it was still accepted, however, as grad adcoms realize how busy profs are). When it looked as though she wouldn't get around to that last letter, I was philosophical about it. She'd already done a lot for me, so even if that ball had been dropped, I really didn't have much to complain about. Perhaps your supervisor is just overwhelmed with work. It doesn't make your situation any easier, but it may not be due to him/her not being supportive of your grad school goals.

[BlueRose]

Now some programs asked me why hasn't my current supervisor written a letter. What should I do in such a situation?

I'm applying again for Fall 2012, and I'm trying to figure out what to do about this.

Many schools will allow you to name an extra letter-writer. You can put both your supervisor and the reliable backup, so even if your supervisor never gets off his/her behind, you've still got the required number (and it's obvious that you weren't avoiding your supervisor, they were just lazy).

[studentaffairsgrad]

Thank you for the advice!

But what if someone knows me very well but is not so enthusiastic about writing a letter for me?

This is my current supervisor. I am now working as an RA in his lab and he was also my undergrad project advisor. So he does know me very well (+ he is the department chair). However, like your friend, I had to constantly remind him to write the letter, and one was even sent 1 day after the deadline. Therefore, I found someone else to write the letters for the rest of schools I applied to. This other person was my MS program director, who does not know me very well, but was very welcoming. I don't know how good/accurate his letter was, though (he sent it directly through the application website).

Now some programs asked me why hasn't my current supervisor written a letter. What should I do in such a situation?

I'm applying again for Fall 2012, and I'm trying to figure out what to do about this.

Any advice?

That is an interesting situation..I've been thinking about this for the last 30 mins, and here is my suggestion.

Since your current supervisor knows you very well and has good credentials, it might be worth a second shot in asking him to write your LORs for 2012 (at least for the programs who make you re-apply). For all we know, last time you asked him he could have been super busy at that time, or dealing with personal issues. I think you need to gauge his interest. I would suggest doing this by sitting down with him, bringing up how you are applying again, and saying something to the effect of, " I was wondering if you would feel comfortable in writing a great letter of rec for me, or if you might suggest some people that would be able to do so." Even if you know darn well who you should ask, this will give him an easy out if his is less than enthusiastic about doing it. That way he doesn't feel obligated to say yes. If he wants to, he will say sure, if not, he will suggest other people.

If he does say he will do it, and you feel good about it, perhaps having the summer which is more quiet at a university, will give him ample time to do it. Also, if your recs are due Dec. 1, tell him they are due Nov 1 (that is what I did) so you don't have to worry about missing the deadline. I know he knows you well, but I gave a folder to my LOR writer's with info about each program I was applying to, so they could tailor letters specifically. This will make less work for them having to look stuff up online, and will show you are organized. (You may have done this last time, but thought I would add that to be sure).

If he doesn't end up wanting to do it again...I'm not sure what I would say to the inquiring programs. My best thought would be something like, "I know that current supervisor's are very frequently used in writing LORs, so I decided to think more outside the box and use people who could give you different perspectives of me than you would normally see." Maybe someone else has advice on what you could say?

[Neuronista]

She still sent in most letters right at the deadline and one a week late (it was still accepted, however, as grad adcoms realize how busy profs are). When it looked as though she wouldn't get around to that last letter, I was philosophical about it. She'd already done a lot for me, so even if that ball had been dropped, I really didn't have much to complain about. Perhaps your supervisor is just overwhelmed with work. It doesn't make your situation any easier, but it may not be due to him/her not being supportive of your grad school goals.

That does make me feel better. Thanks

And it's good to know that adcoms do accept letters after deadlines. I thought that they may perceive this as being irresponsible (esp the student, for not following up on his/her LOR's)

[Neuronista]

That is an interesting situation..I've been thinking about this for the last 30 mins, and here is my suggestion.

Thanks for you time and effort!

Since your current supervisor knows you very well and has good credentials, it might be worth a second shot in asking him to write your LORs for 2012 (at least for the programs who make you re-apply). For all we know, last time you asked him he could have been super busy at that time, or dealing with personal issues. I think you need to gauge his interest. I would suggest doing this by sitting down with him, bringing up how you are applying again, and saying something to the effect of, " I was wondering if you would feel comfortable in writing a great letter of rec for me, or if you might suggest some people that would be able to do so." Even if you know darn well who you should ask, this will give him an easy out if his is less than enthusiastic about doing it. That way he doesn't feel obligated to say yes. If he wants to, he will say sure, if not, he will suggest other people.

If he does say he will do it, and you feel good about it, perhaps having the summer which is more quiet at a university, will give him ample time to do it. Also, if your recs are due Dec. 1, tell him they are due Nov 1 (that is what I did) so you don't have to worry about missing the deadline. I know he knows you well, but I gave a folder to my LOR writer's with info about each program I was applying to, so they could tailor letters specifically. This will make less work for them having to look stuff up online, and will show you are organized. (You may have done this last time, but thought I would add that to be sure).

If he doesn't end up wanting to do it again...I'm not sure what I would say to the inquiring programs. My best thought would be something like, "I know that current supervisor's are very frequently used in writing LORs, so I decided to think more outside the box and use people who could give you different perspectives of me than you would normally see." Maybe someone else has advice on what you could say?

Really great advice. I'll give it a try. Maybe next week when all undergrad tests are over and grades are submitted. Then he'll be much less busy than he is now and we might have more free time to discuss.

[lasgirl]

Good advice!

I will also add that, as prejudice as it might sound, it is really important to get your letters from somebody with a PhD/MD/JD... this comes straight from the head of my department who reads about 920847573 applications every year.

My undergrad thesis adviser was a PhD candidate at my school, who also worked there and taught study abroad programs (which is how I initially met him), and didn't get his PhD until after I'd already heard back from all my schools. And I got into one of my top choices with full funding. Just saying, it's not always make it or break it!