Lack of LOR's..on the verge of a serious anxiety attack!

[butterfingers2010]

Just as the title implies, I am quickly burning through my options for LOR's. I already have 2 lined up, but for some of the schools I am applying to I need 3. I have already asked all the professors whom I feel know me well enough to write. One agreed to do so, but the others I never even heard back from. After a couple weeks of not hearing back I followed up with voice mails, and so far..no response. I don't understand why I can't even get a yes/no response. Is that so much to ask for? I know it's not because I am a bad student...on the contrary I have a 3.8 gpa and earned A's from all the professors in question. I seemed to have a good rapport with all of them, so I am really confused as to why they can't even respond to my messages.

I have been out of school for almost 2 years so now I am leaning more toward professional references in my field. I already have one from my boss, and just recently asked an old co-worker if she would write one. This particular co-worker just graduated from the same program I am applying to so I am hoping that gives her letter at least a little more credibility than if I had just asked any co-worker, but I know I am grabbing at straws at this point. I work full time and this is what I have been doing for the last 2 years...I really can't think of any other realms of my life from which I could possibly get an LOR. The problem is that I can see her being a little flaky and/or not having the time. She enthusiastically agreed to review my SOP a month ago, and haven't heard back about that yet, so that doesn't give me much confidence that she could get my letter together for me.

I know that people lead busy lives and sometimes it takes awhile to respond to emails, phone calls, etc. but I'm starting to feel a bit jaded and frustrated. I honestly can't think of any other quality LOR possibilities at this point, but I don't want a lack of LOR's to blow my chances. Three of the schools I am applying to only require 2 or no letters, but even one of my "safety" school requires three letters! I already have one strike against me, which is doing badly on the GRE, and now this. I am starting to think that I should just give up on the whole idea of grad school, or only apply to the schools that only ask for 2 letters. I like to be in control of things, and it really bothers me that this seems to be out of my control and potentially ruining my chances of grad school. Maybe I am prematurely anxious, but I am feeling super uptight about this right now. I honestly don't know what I did to deserve this predicament. I did everything I was supposed to...I got a degree, did extremely well in school, have lots of work experience in my field, and plan on submitting killer SOP's. I know I bombed the GRE and I was a fairly quiet student, but nobody is perfect and I just want a better future for myself.

Advice? Encouragement? Anything? I can't be the only one who has been through this... : (.

[ktel]

Are you able to pop into the professor's offices? I know SO many absent-minded professors who really do better in face-to-face interaction. Otherwise it wouldn't hurt to send another e-mail to all the professors in questions. When did you send your first e-mail? Keep in mind that summers are a busy time for professors because they are travelling a lot to conferences, and then September is also busy because school is starting.

Do you have another boss? Or is your workplace small? I would use your co-worker as a last resort.

Keep annoying people until they give you an answer. It isn't unreasonable to expect a yes or no answer.

[Eigen]

As I mentioned in the other thread, I would strongly recommend using your co-worker only if you can find nothing else.

I also second Ktel's advice of dropping into the professors offices- I know my PI gets 50-75 e-mails every day, and while he often means to get around to responding to something later, it gets buried very quickly and he forgets about it.

[Kitkat]

I am in a similar situation, where I have two good recs all lined up, but the third one I still have to get, so I understand how frustrated you are, albiet mine is for a different reason. My department is really small, and most of my classes have been for one reason or another for the most part with two of the professors. So while other professors know me because they might have had one class with me, the problem has mainly been the fact that they have had only class with me. I am wondering what people think about asking profs you have only had one class that you have done well with or if I should ask someone like the head of the department who knows me and the work I have done with my research and what classes I have been taking, or if I should try one of the professors that I had one class with that I did well with first?

[butterfingers2010]

Well just for an update..I was finally able to secure a third LOR. What I did was send out e-mails to all the psych profs who I had for class who I thought might remember me reasonably well, and two responded. One kind of flaked out, which is fine because I don't need 4 LOR's anyway. The other requested that I write my own LOR and submit it to him to edit and send out, which is pretty much a dream come true for any grad school applicant. Keep trying KitKat. I was surprised that this professor agreed to write my letter, considering, as you mentioned, I only had one class with him, and on top of that he is a super busy person (probably why he asked me to write my own). Just think of all your possibilities and keep trying until you get a "yes" answer. I would definitely go the professor route first, since grad school seems to prefer that over work references, etc. Good luck!