The Interview- It's a further fall when you're almost at the apex..

[CarlieE]

So I know those us who have gotten on the short list, or have scored an invite to the interview stage should be happy. I made got an interview, I'm happy. I'm also FrEaKeD OuT. Here's a list of thoughts that have run through my brain since I got the email:

"I'm a fraud, and now everyone will find out."

"I won't meet their expectations"

"I'm so so so excited, I have to tell EVeRYONE.... but wait, then they'll all want to know if I really do get accepted. What if I still get rejected?"

"What kind of questions are they going to ask?"

"What should I WEAR????"

"Are these pants "business casual"?"

"I need to re-read ALL my theory."

"I need to commit my theoretical framework to memory. Now."

"I don't know nearly enough!!"

"How many spots are we competing for again?"

"What do I WEAR??? I have NOTHING!! I need to go shopping NOW!!"

"What the HELL is Business CASUAL anyway??"

"Remember to smile a lot. No wait, I'll look like an idiot. Don't smile."

Then last night, I was gripped by (more) anxiety and spent the evening meditating in front of a candle and listening to Buddha Bar radio... wishing for a release from desire so my suffering can end.

Any advice? Want to commiserate or share your experience, your comments will be welcome!

[Ameonna]

This is definitely me!! I'm preparing for campus visits, and I'm so deathly afraid that I'll come across as a ditz in person, or that I'll mess up a really important question ("What's your name?" "Um... Ummmm... KRUSKAL WALLIS" "That's a really odd name...") I'm also afraid that I just won't fit in when I arrive there; that I'll somehow be out of the loop or just seem "out of place". By the same token, though, I'm really looking forward to getting a good look at the school, meeting everyone, and taking a close look at what could be my future (hopefully)!!

I can assure you that I have never been as obsessed with my wardrobe as I am right now. Freaking BARBIE doesn't care as much about what she's wearing as much as I do for these visits, haha! I'm guessing business casual (at least for a girl) is khaki/dark pants, a cute (but not overly flashy) shirt or blouse, and flats or nice shoes with small heels. Jewelry should accentuate the outfit, but not overpower it. Makeup should be subtle. At least, that's what I THINK it is... I could be wrong!

[wlkwih2]

I'm scared of a possible phone interview, I'd die before a real one.

[PhDreaming]

Speaking of wardrobe... I've never been a "business casual" person. The only button up shirts I own are flannels and my only pair of solid colored pants that are not jeans are from "21 Men" and are totally form-fitting/stretch. I sound like a total fool but I rock a very specific style. I've never found myself in a situation where my clothes were a problem but how is this going to play out when I visit campuses for interviews?

[radiowires]

Yeah... this is me in a nutshell.

(but really, what should I wear?!)

Edited January 27, 2012 by radiowires

[psychdork]

I'm here to commiserate with you all.

I decided last month that if I got an interview I would only tell a few people, and make them promise to keep it a secret. I really do not want the extra pressure of everyone knowing (even if this pressure is just "all in my head"). However, I didn't realize how hard it is not to say anything to everyone else! Several of my friends posted on facebook today that they have interviews and it is so hard not to post anything, or go tell Prof. So-and-so that I have one (my department is very gossipy so I'm nervous that if I tell something to certain profs, everyone will know everything).

I really need to go buy a new suit, and I really need to start reviewing my POI's research interests. On top of an already crazy semester.

I'm also nervous because part of this interview is a group interview and so I will have to be a little more assertive than I usually am (without going overboard).

Was anyone else surprised with their reaction? I basically checked my phone, saw that I got an email, and then turned off my phone like it was any other email. I even remember telling myself that I should be smiling! It's not that I'm not happy I got it, but I had thought I would be really excited and instead it was almost like I had no reaction. One of my friends said that its probably that it hasn't hit me yet which makes sense given everything recently but it was still weird.

[koolherc]

Then last night, I was gripped by (more) anxiety and spent the evening meditating in front of a candle and listening to Buddha Bar radio... wishing for a release from desire so my suffering can end.

your whole post was excellent but this part was the kicker

[coffeeplease]

"Remember to smile a lot. No wait, I'll look like an idiot. Don't smile."

Ha, I had an interview on Skype and this was me. I worried more than usual because I could see how I looked -- should have minimized that window, in hindsight.

Also, sometimes I nod when someone is talking to me as a sign that I understand/agree/am listening. At one point during the interview, I thought to myself, "OH GOD, I MUST LOOK LIKE A BOBBLEHEAD!"

Fun times.

[CarlieE]

Thanks everyone! I'm glad I'm not in this predicament by myself and good luck to all!!

[jerzygrl]

Speaking of wardrobe... I've never been a "business casual" person. The only button up shirts I own are flannels and my only pair of solid colored pants that are not jeans are from "21 Men" and are totally form-fitting/stretch. I sound like a total fool but I rock a very specific style. I've never found myself in a situation where my clothes were a problem but how is this going to play out when I visit campuses for interviews?

I've been thinking about this one a lot as I have also been seriously wondering what I should wear!!! So I decided that if you can rock a very specific look that speaks to people about who you are then you should absolutely wear it. If, on the other hand, you are like me and just try to blend into the crowd I think business casual is best. This means I will be going shopping.... I only own two types of shoes: street shoes and hooker heels, neither of which screams business casual.

And what about the weekend long "events"? Does anyone think it is possible to wear a comfortable pair of jeans with a nice shirt one day? I can be more myself if I feel comfortable in my clothes. I am concerned that if I am wearing something I wouldn't normally wear I will feel uncomfortable and not leave the impression I want to leave with the adcom. (why I think one should wear what they feel comfortable in if it speaks to their personality)

[Ameonna]

I'm in the middle of the process as I speak (er, type)! What I can say from my experience so far is HAVE A LOT OF QUESTIONS!! Not only does it show that you're interested in the school, but it allows you to get a realistic perspective of what life as a grad student be like. I am being asked fairly consistently if I have questions, and I have been doing my best to be prepared for that. There's certainly a lot to ask about. I found this thread in particular very helpful for questions to ask at campus visits/interviews: As for what to wear, I honestly still don't know for sure, but I think the trick is to strike a balance between feeling comfortable and looking put-together... if that makes any sense.

What's really nice is that despite all my worrying and obsessive preparation, the potential advisor I met with really made me feel relaxed and comfortable talking with him, and I genuinely enjoyed our conversation; it didn't feel like an interview or anything, just two researchers talking. I think that's a really good sign.

[coonskee]

Speaking of wardrobe... I've never been a "business casual" person. The only button up shirts I own are flannels and my only pair of solid colored pants that are not jeans are from "21 Men" and are totally form-fitting/stretch. I sound like a total fool but I rock a very specific style. I've never found myself in a situation where my clothes were a problem but how is this going to play out when I visit campuses for interviews?

I think that you should invest in a suit or at least slacks etc, to be honest. You can totally put an "edgy" spin on the business casual, but I think it's important to look sharp/formal/professional first, and yourself second in these scenarios. If you look too 'different' (if you will), people might not think you care as much, if that makes sense?

[CarlieE]

So.... how do you feel about tattoos? I have two visible ones - not huge, but not small - on both my wrists. I have never hidden them and I frankly don't intend to. I will dress pleasantly in "business casual": grey flat front slacks, white collared blouse and wine colored, distressed velvet blazer. I'm still deciding on the shoes... My arms will be covered to the wrist by my blazer, but I'm sure that sometime during the weekend long interview trip my wrists will be exposed.

Granted, I'm in cultural anthropology AND the region I'm studying has traditional tattoos - AND in fact, I did get those tattoos done there in the traditional method during my last two trips to the region. So my tats may attest to my commitment to my field...

However, I'm not there now. And I'm going to assume I'll be judged by "American" standards (whatever those are). Anyway, I know where I stand when it comes to my tats... Any thoughts from anyone else?

btw - I spoke to the POI at the uni I am going to interview at and I feel so so so so much better about it now. I'm just going to be myself and try to get my theory and knowledge into a coherent package that I can deliver succinctly. ie I am going to rehearse some of my answers to questions I think I'll be hit with.

[coonskee]

I have a tattoo on my wrist as well. It circles the wrist, though, so most people never even notice it - they assume it's a bracelet - but I wore a watch to my interviews just in case. Only one person noticed the tatt over the course of the weekend, and she was a fellow applicant

Plus, you're not in finance, you're going to grad school... I don't think tatts are as big a deal (especially if they're nerdy ones!). The only reason I wore the watch was, basically, just in case I got a crazy tradtional interviewer... I figured that the rest of me was dressed up and prepared enough, though, that a bit of ink wouldn't matter. *shrug*