What if I don't like my Advisor?!

[kittyk]

I think I can work with almost anyone in the world, regardless of my personal feelings about them, but I've just been wondering - what if I don't like my advisor?! I started thinking about this because the supervisor I have been assigned seems very aloof, and I'm wondering whether this will affect me negatively once I start grad school.

 

I've only corresponded with him via email throughout the application process, and every email he starts with "Dear FirstName LastName", and then he gives very terse, to-the-point answers and always directs me to someone else for further queries. He exchanges absolutely no niceties, such as I have experienced with my other POIs. In addition, he has ignored 2 requests I made to speak with him via telephone or Skype - once before applying and once after being accepted and told he's my Supervisor. I'm really hoping he's not this 'standoffish' when I actually get there.

 

Has anyone ever worked with a professor like this, and how did that affect your research? Any advice on not letting his personality/behavior affect my academic performance?

[bsharpe269]

Honestly, in acedmia people can be pretty awkward... so he may just be shy/sort of awkward and not comfortable wtih skyping. I wouldn't worry too much about it until you get there and meet him. Also, switching advisors may be an option once you are there.

[soylatte5]

maybe give him benefit of the doubt, but if you meet him and he's still like that, ask yourself if this is the type of person you can truly work with. 

 

personally, his behavior would be red flags to me and i would immediately seek out a different primary advisor. maybe he's an expert that can advise in certain regards but he can simply be on your committee rather than your primary advisor. sure, words can be misinterpreted vibes you get from someone since you can't see/hear the emotions expressed in their words but the exchanges I had with POIs clearly indicated that they were very kind, interested in working with me and willing to answer any questions before i had decided even though i didn't speak with them live. personalities don't change so if you don't immediately hit it off with someone, it's a clear sign that you shouldn't work with them because you're not going to have much fun while doing it. not sure if you're doing a masters or phd but, regardless, having a healthy/good relationship with an advisor is key to success in your career. my master's advisor had and continues to support me in many ways (especially with my rec letter which was likely solid because we genuinely liked each other). i've also developed a great network because of him. 

 

if you're ok with dealing with certain personality types, do as you like. just my 2 cents, good luck!

[Tall Chai Latte]

Like others pointed out, it's better to meet him in person before you guard yourself up. Some people are very terse in email communication, but once met in person and research becomes the conversation topic, they can light up and talk non-stop. I have a PI on my committee who's like that. He rarely responds to myself but gave me a lot of helpful advice during my committee meeting. You never know. 

[rising_star]

My advisor can be like that via email. He was definitely like that when I was trying to decide where to go. It's worked out okay, in part because I'd met him in person before so I knew there was a difference between his email and in-person communication styles. In person, my advisor is awesome. Via email? Not so much. So now, I don't try to handle anything important via email. It works much better this way.

 

If you really can't work with the person, then you should meet with other potential advisors once you arrive and settle in (i.e., not before October). You should view the meeting as an interview from both sides. You're trying to see if their personality, advising style, subject expertise, mentorship approach, etc. will work for you and they're trying to see similar things about you.

[kittyk]

Thanks for sharing your thoughts guys! I really hope he's just awkward via email and that he turns out to be great in person, but my gut tells me otherwise and I'm usually good at reading people. His responses have tempered my excitement about grad school a bit. I had pictured having a great relationship with my advisor, going to conferences and networking with this person guiding me through it all.

I'll wait until I get there to decide what I want to do, but I definitely will have to switch advisors if he's like that in person. The problem is I'm an international student and I won't get there until 2 weeks before classes start. Would I be able to switch advisors that late. I'm doing a 2 year Masters, and I won't be able to deal with that for 2 years. Is it possible to get a new advisor at the start of my second year?

I'm hopeful that it won't have to get to this, but I'd like to know my options ahead of time.

[bsharpe269]

Thanks for sharing your thoughts guys! I really hope he's just awkward via email and that he turns out to be great in person, but my gut tells me otherwise and I'm usually good at reading people. His responses have tempered my excitement about grad school a bit. I had pictured having a great relationship with my advisor, going to conferences and networking with this person guiding me through it all.

I'll wait until I get there to decide what I want to do, but I definitely will have to switch advisors if he's like that in person. The problem is I'm an international student and I won't get there until 2 weeks before classes start. Would I be able to switch advisors that late. I'm doing a 2 year Masters, and I won't be able to deal with that for 2 years. Is it possible to get a new advisor at the start of my second year?

I'm hopeful that it won't have to get to this, but I'd like to know my options ahead of time.

 

This probably depends on the school but you should be able to switch in your first semester. I don't see why it would be a huge problem until you start your thesis.

[VioletAyame]

I was concerned with this too (not for any particular reason, everybody seemed very nice. It's just that I usually don't trust first impression and also think that I might change my focus later on), so I always made sure to ask around (both faculty and current students) how easy or hard it is to switch advisor. Most programs don't require me to settle on a formal advisor until the end of my first year; the formal process (paperwork) to change advisor is pretty much the same; but there's a clear difference in the department culture on how or if it should be done, how common it is and if anyone should get offended by it. It's an important factor for me and I finally decided to go somewhere where it's not a big deal to do this and your old advisor can still be on your committee without any issue.

[kittyk]

I was concerned with this too (not for any particular reason, everybody seemed very nice. It's just that I usually don't trust first impression and also think that I might change my focus later on), so I always made sure to ask around (both faculty and current students) how easy or hard it is to switch advisor. Most programs don't require me to settle on a formal advisor until the end of my first year; the formal process (paperwork) to change advisor is pretty much the same; but there's a clear difference in the department culture on how or if it should be done, how common it is and if anyone should get offended by it. It's an important factor for me and I finally decided to go somewhere where it's not a big deal to do this and your old advisor can still be on your committee without any issue.

I was wondering about the advisor getting offended if I asked for a change and how that could turn out, especially if I'll be working with him afterwards. It could probably get a bit awkward.

[VioletAyame]

I was wondering about the advisor getting offended if I asked for a change and how that could turn out, especially if I'll be working with him afterwards. It could probably get a bit awkward.

Check with his current advisees as well as other students in the program. Talk to the DGS. I find that even if your POI is a bit standoffish, if the overall enviroment is supportive and switching is to a degree normall, it wouldn't be a huge problem.

[kittyk]

Check with his current advisees as well as other students in the program. Talk to the DGS. I find that even if your POI is a bit standoffish, if the overall enviroment is supportive and switching is to a degree normall, it wouldn't be a huge problem.

I'll definitely be checking with current students to hear their thoughts on my advisor as well as the overall program.

[juilletmercredi]

One of my advisors is also really terse over email, but is really awesome in person.  A lot of academics really just are that awkward in electronic communications.  Others have so many competing demands on their time that they just dash off emails semi-thoughtlessly (I think my advisor falls into the latter camp).  My other advisor wrote an email to me the other day and sent the email mid-sentence, so it just stopped in the middle of a sentence, lol.

 

So I agree with the advice to wait until you get there.  However, I know people who have worked with relatively standoffish professors with varying levels of success.  It really depends on your working style and your own personality.  If you need a good personal relationship with your advisor to succeed, you may be unhappy.  If you can work past your advisor's weird personality issues and keep the relationship strictly professional, then you may be able to deal with it - especially if the advisor is very prolific.  A lot of that also has to do with the field and how much time you have to spend in their presence, and how finicky they are about work you do with/for them.

[themmases]

I personally wouldn't try to switch unless I were losing sleep over my relationship with them, or they were holding me back in some way. You really can't know that based on not liking how someone writes their emails. Also, whatever you do as a job after your masters degree, you won't be able to just switch bosses and you will be expected to communicate with people above you in whatever way they prefer, whether it's your favorite or not. Lots of people don't like the phone or Skype, and it's really none of your business why. If you strongly prefer it, insist on it with people who need something from you. That's pretty much how it works.

 

PIs send weird emails-- it's just what they do. Mine sends me stream of consciousness emails about stuff she wants me to do, in clusters of 3-4, in the middle of the night, on weekends and on her own vacations. Another one sends me emails with smiley faces warning me when her academic days are, and she'll be showing up in my office unannounced wanting me to Photoshop arrows onto defective child hearts. It can be very difficult to read tone in these emails, even when you've known someone for a long time and especially when you've never actually met them. Also, many people remain pretty formal in email until they do meet the person they're writing to. Not getting worked up about these emails-- or at least finding a way to respond to them that calms you down, rather than having you re-plan the next 2 years of your life-- is a life skill you might as well develop now.

[Munashi]

You have good advice here.  Meet them in person and then decide.  Some people just come off rudely in text.  My undergrad advisor was like that - lovely in person, very terse-sounding over email for whatever reason.

 

That said, I would put my feelers out and check with other students about how common/"easy" it is to change primary advisors in your program.  Also ask if there are political ramifications - in some programs it is easily doable, but still extremely frowned upon.  You could also speak with your advisor's current students and find out from them how they find his mentoring style, etc.

[geographyrocks]

Have you tried Googling him?  My advisor is fairly terse in email, but so am I.  Email says nothing about a person.  So I Googled him and I also spoke to a former student.  It turns out that my new advisor is completely awesome!  I found all sorts of cool stuff. 

[kittyk]

Well, I have googled him, but I haven't found much, except some of the research he has done. I also searched for him on ratemyprofessor.com, but he's not there.

 

Luckily, I've been able to speak with one of his current students. She mentioned that he's a bit 'strict', not sure exactly what that means, but she says he has an open door policy and she feels comfortable talking to him. So, for now, I'm not as concerned as I was before. I will be asking her lots more questions when next we talk.