jhefflol Posted January 14, 2015 Share Posted January 14, 2015 Now that some decisions have started coming in (congrats to those who have been admitted!), I thought maybe we should talk about thank you gifts for our recommenders. I know that there are some other threads around GC, but I thought we could talk about field-specific gifts. What do you plan on sending to your recommenders, if anything? I've seen some responses that suggest a personalized card or email is sufficient, others have given gift cards or other material gifts. I was thinking maybe a gift card from Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or a local book store if I were to go the gift card route. Personally, my favorite gift idea I have seen on GC is a mug from whatever university the student decides to attend. However, this raises my next question: When is the appropriate time to give such gifts? After all letters have been submitted? Once the student decides where he or she will be attending? Once all admissions decisions have been received? What do you guys plan to do? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1Q84 Posted January 14, 2015 Share Posted January 14, 2015 I would wait until decisions come out to avoid any instances of "over thanking." I would want whatever gesture I make to be appropriate to the outcome. Not that I appreciate the LOR any less if I don't get in anywhere but a card may suffice in one instance while a bottle of wine may be appropriate for another. (Wine being appropriate for the professors I see that keep a few bottles in their office at all times.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr. Old Bill Posted January 14, 2015 Share Posted January 14, 2015 (edited) I gave one of my recommenders a couple bottles of whiskey. I gave another a nice leather journal with handcrafted paper (not my own handiwork, mind you). A third, I didn't give anything...but primarily because he's now emeritus, and also because I gave him a personal retirement gift last spring. I have a couple other LOR writers who wrote for a few of my applications. One I didn't give anything, but mainly because I have another class with him this semester, and don't want anyone to get the wrong impression. Another wrote three LORs, but he's currently a visiting assistant professor at another SLAC, and we didn't really have the kind of relationship to make a gift feel appropriate. I gave the gifts after all of my letters were officially uploaded. I figure the gifts were for them doing the letter writing and not for my acceptance(s)... ETA: Cross-posted with 1Q84. Edited January 14, 2015 by Wyatt's Torch Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ramus Posted January 14, 2015 Share Posted January 14, 2015 Mmm I gave out thank you cards, but I don't intend to give out gifts. When I applied to MA programs two years ago, two of my three recommenders explicitly stated that I shouldn't give them gifts because LOR writing falls under their 'service' expectations. Between that and the fact that I'd only be able to afford to give out bottles of Yellow Tail, I think I'll stick with 'thank you's. But I agree with 1Q84 that, were you to give out gifts, it'd probably be best to wait until decisions start rolling in. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mikers86 Posted January 14, 2015 Share Posted January 14, 2015 My LOR writers also explicitly stated not to get them gifts. As Ramus stated, it's part of their service. A card is sufficient, though taking them out for a drink at a "nice" establishment isn't outside the realm of possibility. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr. Old Bill Posted January 14, 2015 Share Posted January 14, 2015 My LOR writers also explicitly stated not to get them gifts. As Ramus stated, it's part of their service. A card is sufficient, though taking them out for a drink at a "nice" establishment isn't outside the realm of possibility. I don't necessarily disagree, but...a "gift" shouldn't be an expectation anyhow, should it? I didn't get my two main LOR writers gifts because I felt I had to, but rather because I wanted to. They were -- quite literally -- tokens of my appreciation. It's the same for the folks who took the time to look over my SOP for me last summer. They offered to do it, and I certainly didn't have to give them a gift...but I felt a $5 eCard from Starbucks or Amazon was just a nice little token of appreciation. I know that gift-giving can be seen as quasi-political, which is why I waited until after the various tasks (LOR written or SOP reviewed) were done before I sent a little "thank you" gift. There's literally nothing more I could have gained from those people if I was of a political bent (though anyone who knows me would find such an idea hysterical...I'm probably the least "political" person around). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zanmato4794 Posted January 15, 2015 Share Posted January 15, 2015 (edited) I live about four hours from the school where I did my M.A., and my boyfriend still lives in that area. If I get accepted, I'm basically driving down as soon as I can, putting thank-you cards (filled in with the good news of course) with an amazon gift card in my writers' department mailboxes, and then visiting my boyfriend to tell him in person where we'll be living this fall. Kind of a hell of a drive, but it feels right, I think. Plus I love any excuse to visit the town where I went to grad school. Edit: Not that I planned this out months ago and have been obsessively fantasizing about it ever since or anything. No no no. Nothing like that. Edited January 15, 2015 by zanmato4794 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
queennight Posted January 15, 2015 Share Posted January 15, 2015 Mmm I gave out thank you cards, but I don't intend to give out gifts. When I applied to MA programs two years ago, two of my three recommenders explicitly stated that I shouldn't give them gifts because LOR writing falls under their 'service' expectations. Between that and the fact that I'd only be able to afford to give out bottles of Yellow Tail, I think I'll stick with 'thank you's. But I agree with 1Q84 that, were you to give out gifts, it'd probably be best to wait until decisions start rolling in. But ... $20 wine ... Ramus and 1Q84 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hreaðemus Posted January 15, 2015 Share Posted January 15, 2015 *pokes nose timidly into conversation* Um... so I love gifts... but this thread is making me nervous. Whether it is proper and professional or not, I absolutely adore my letter writers on a personal as well as professional level, and give them (small) gifts all the time. (I get gifts back, as well - does that make it less weird?) I have a background in visual arts, so I am painting something for each of them to show my appreciation for their help with grad apps in particular. I am especially geekily proud of my most favorite mentor's gift - I painted an imitation page from a medieval manuscript based on an old joke about sea turtles and bioluminescent algae (hard to explain). It has a border of silly animals, and the same short goofy poem written in Latin on one side and Old English on the other... I haven't given it to her yet, but it makes me laugh every time I look at it. I think gifts are awesome, and while I may be a person who errs on the side of over-thanking, I suspect we all like to feel special and appreciated, and I show my appreciation whenever I can. Hopefully they all understand and don't mind! I've never had anyone object, so I think it's ok... zanmato4794 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xolo Posted January 15, 2015 Share Posted January 15, 2015 I'm not sure I can top the esoteric and positive nature of the previous post. When I thanked my mentor for writing me an LOR she admonished me to not celebrate until an acceptance is had. Previously, I had made a video of an indigenous interviewee speaking about their language, which I showed my mentor. There was a bottle of wine in the background, but well on-camera. After viewing the video, she commented "I see a bottle of wine in the background. Wow, great, let's drink the wine. Bring the wine right over and we'll drink it." So I know what to get her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr. Old Bill Posted January 15, 2015 Share Posted January 15, 2015 I think gifts are awesome, and while I may be a person who errs on the side of over-thanking, I suspect we all like to feel special and appreciated, and I show my appreciation whenever I can. Hopefully they all understand and don't mind! I've never had anyone object, so I think it's ok... THIS. To a T. I'm much the same way. I thank and show appreciation a lot. It's just in my nature. I often worry, however, that people will occasionally interpret it as obsequiousness or assume that I have an ulterior motive...and given that "ulterior motive" is probably at the top of the list of Traits Wyatt's Torch HatesTM, I always try to make it clear that it's just thankfulness and appreciation pure and simple. wetheplants 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ramus Posted January 15, 2015 Share Posted January 15, 2015 I often worry, however, that people will occasionally interpret it as obsequiousness or assume that I have an ulterior motive...and given that "ulterior motive" is probably at the top of the list of Traits Wyatt's Torch HatesTM, I always try to make it clear that it's just thankfulness and appreciation pure and simple. While I'm not discounting the possibility that some professors might understand student gifts this way, my guess is that most of them that ask you not to get gifts do so because they're uncomfortable with students spending money on them. They realize that the majority of both grads and undergrads aren't exactly swimming in excess cash, and the thought of those students spending what little they have on a gift makes those professors feel guilty. Now, I seriously doubt any professor is going to object if you attach, for example, a small value ($5-10) Starbucks gift card, to your thank you note. But, personally, I'd avoid spending much more than that on a gift. *pokes nose timidly into conversation* Um... so I love gifts... but this thread is making me nervous. I think your plan to give your mentor a painting is a great idea. And, in general, if you're naturally inclined to give gifts, and especially if you normally make gifts, I think in most cases you can go ahead and do it. The only thing I might add is that it's not bad practice not to get something to a LOR writer. If you want to get a little something, I think that's fine; if not, that's fine, too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
__________________________ Posted March 20, 2015 Share Posted March 20, 2015 Bumping this thread because I'm in the process of making my decision official and still haven't figured out appropriate gifts for the people who helped me most through this process and I feel kind of bad about that. So I'm curious if people have already done this or are about to. Right now I'm thinking of getting a book for my letter writer/UG major advisor (maybe a book by someone at the university I'll be attending? Or maybe just something of general interest I think she'd enjoy based on our conversations and work together? This woman has been a lifeline for me and I can't think of any possible way of repaying her for the intellectual, emotional, and material gifts she has given to me over the past few years), maybe a bottle of wine for my letter writer/UG minor advisor. I also want to get something for my third letter writer (who works in a very different field than me, but was a wonderful professor even as she cautioned me about why getting a Ph.D. is not a good idea) and for another professor who didn't write me a LOR but did provide me with some really helpful feedback for making my writing sample the best it could be. FWIW, letter writer #3 does Victorian lit and the professor who helped with WS is a classicist. I will of course accompany each gift with a nice card/note informing them of my official decision and thanking them for their help. Now that April is fast approaching and many people have already started making their official decisions, what are y'all doing for this? Any advice is welcome. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lyonessrampant Posted March 20, 2015 Share Posted March 20, 2015 Maybe something from the school you will be attending? Coffee mug or bookmark or something small? Dr. Old Bill and __________________________ 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr. Old Bill Posted March 20, 2015 Share Posted March 20, 2015 Maybe something from the school you will be attending? Coffee mug or bookmark or something small? I think that's a delightful idea! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
__________________________ Posted March 20, 2015 Share Posted March 20, 2015 Maybe something from the school you will be attending? Coffee mug or bookmark or something small? Yeah, that is a nice idea. As usual, I've probably been overthinking it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
empress-marmot Posted March 20, 2015 Share Posted March 20, 2015 Maybe something from the school you will be attending? Coffee mug or bookmark or something small? I read something like that before, and I think it's an absolutely charming idea. Every professor needs a new coffee/tea mug. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kurayamino Posted March 20, 2015 Share Posted March 20, 2015 I ended up getting personalized bookplate rubber stamps for my LOR's and two other professors who were invaluable during the process. I went through this vendor on Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/AsspocketProductions?section_id=5720267&ref=shopsection_leftnav_1who was very quick and the products were of a high quality and also affordable. I am not associated with this seller either so no conflict of interest, I promise! 1Q84, hypervodka and __________________________ 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1Q84 Posted March 21, 2015 Share Posted March 21, 2015 Maybe something from the school you will be attending? Coffee mug or bookmark or something small? Hmmm I'm always paranoid I'll offend a professor with this kind of gift (along the lines of accidentally getting a Yalie alum Princeton merch). I figure I can't offend with alcohol, although I'm not sure if my third recommender drinks... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
__________________________ Posted March 21, 2015 Share Posted March 21, 2015 I ended up getting personalized bookplate rubber stamps for my LOR's and two other professors who were invaluable during the process. I went through this vendor on Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/AsspocketProductions?section_id=5720267&ref=shopsection_leftnav_1who was very quick and the products were of a high quality and also affordable. I am not associated with this seller either so no conflict of interest, I promise! This is wonderful! Thanks for sharing! Hmmm I'm always paranoid I'll offend a professor with this kind of gift (along the lines of accidentally getting a Yalie alum Princeton merch). I figure I can't offend with alcohol, although I'm not sure if my third recommender drinks... This has occurred to me too, oddly enough. Maybe for different reasons -- I think I'm paranoid that such a gift at my weirdo little SLAC would come off as a little generic, but I'm most likely way overthinking it. I figure booze always is appropriate -- maybe I've been in the midwest too long though. It's too cold out here to not drink. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greenmt Posted March 21, 2015 Share Posted March 21, 2015 How about something related to their scholarly interest, but in a different medium? An Anonymous 4 CD for a medievalist, for example, or a print of a Winslow Homer painting for a 19th C Americanist? __________________________ 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wetheplants Posted March 23, 2015 Share Posted March 23, 2015 Now that some decisions have started coming in (congrats to those who have been admitted!), I thought maybe we should talk about thank you gifts for our recommenders. I know that there are some other threads around GC, but I thought we could talk about field-specific gifts. What do you plan on sending to your recommenders, if anything? I've seen some responses that suggest a personalized card or email is sufficient, others have given gift cards or other material gifts. I was thinking maybe a gift card from Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or a local book store if I were to go the gift card route. Personally, my favorite gift idea I have seen on GC is a mug from whatever university the student decides to attend. However, this raises my next question: When is the appropriate time to give such gifts? After all letters have been submitted? Once the student decides where he or she will be attending? Once all admissions decisions have been received? What do you guys plan to do? I did Cheryl's cookies - we've recieved them as gifts before and they're very good! Sign up for their emails, they send LOOOTS of sale codes. Nice cookies and won't break the bank either! =] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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