ct1993 Posted February 19, 2015 Posted February 19, 2015 I recently received my first and (most likely) only acceptance for a PhD program. Unfortunately, after reviewing the funding off and my own finances (private student loans), I realized there is no way that I can afford to attend. I appealed the funding offer, but the deptartment said there is nothing they can do to help me. My question is how to go about turning down the offer. My POI that I interviewed with has been really enthusiastic and supportive throughout the application process and already has a project planned for me. How do I go about turning down the offer without hurting their feelings? Every time I try to right the email, I end with something really generic like "I'm sorry to inform you that I cannot afford to attend your program. Better luck with other graduate students," and I feel like they deserve a bit more than that. Does anybody have an advice or woud you be willing to help me get started?
MathCat Posted February 19, 2015 Posted February 19, 2015 I wouldn't include something like "Better luck with other graduate students." It might sound like you think too highly of yourself (they are missing out on something great by you not attending). Others might give different advice, but I would say that I can't attend for financial reasons. It is a completely legitimate reason. Maybe they don't really care, but there is a small and nonzero chance that somebody might want you enough to change the offer. I think honesty is better for everyone in this process. neongolden, Vene, Taeyers and 1 other 4
AuntyOwl Posted February 19, 2015 Posted February 19, 2015 I agree with MathCat. You should be open and honest with your POI and explain that, even though you would love to work with him/her, you are having a hard time finding a way of meeting your budget responsibilities with the offer the department made. I would not close the door just yet. I do not know your field of research, but in the sciences, if you are joining a particular project, the PI might have a way of taking an extra money from the grant for that project to complement the department fellowship. Scarecrow24 1
geographyrocks Posted February 19, 2015 Posted February 19, 2015 I concur with the previous posts. Simply say: I would love to attend, but I can not support myself on the financial package that was offered.
TakeruK Posted February 19, 2015 Posted February 19, 2015 The above advice is good. Another opinion though is that you should not be specific at all when you turn them down. There's a chance that someone will view your reason as whiny and/or ungrateful. Instead, save this important feedback for the exit survey you'll get from the University once you officially decline their offer. However, it does sound like you have a good relationship with this POI and being honest and sincere (without sounding ungrateful) should work too. Igotnothin, dr. t, kaykaykay and 1 other 1 3
MathCat Posted February 19, 2015 Posted February 19, 2015 The above advice is good. Another opinion though is that you should not be specific at all when you turn them down. There's a chance that someone will view your reason as whiny and/or ungrateful. Instead, save this important feedback for the exit survey you'll get from the University once you officially decline their offer. However, it does sound like you have a good relationship with this POI and being honest and sincere (without sounding ungrateful) should work too. I think the problem with this approach is that you aren't giving them a chance to fix it. You definitely have to be careful about how you phrase it, though. nugget, doyleowl, kaykaykay and 1 other 4
nugget Posted February 20, 2015 Posted February 20, 2015 (edited) I think the problem with this approach is that you aren't giving them a chance to fix it. You definitely have to be careful about how you phrase it, though. I agree with Mathcat. If the OP is having difficulty making ends meet on that budget, chances are a lot of people who receive the same offer on their waitlist will be in the same position. It is important for them to receive that kind of feedback from students. Perhaps this will encourage them to try harder to find more funding in the future. After all, you do need to eat and you can't sleep in your car at night in order to attend their program. There is nothing wrong with being honest about the situation in a professional and respectful way. Edited February 20, 2015 by jenste
ct1993 Posted February 20, 2015 Author Posted February 20, 2015 I wouldn't include something like "Better luck with other graduate students." It might sound like you think too highly of yourself (they are missing out on something great by you not attending). Others might give different advice, but I would say that I can't attend for financial reasons. It is a completely legitimate reason. Maybe they don't really care, but there is a small and nonzero chance that somebody might want you enough to change the offer. I think honesty is better for everyone in this process. Thank you for your response. I wasn't going to literally say "Better luck with other graduate students", but something to that effect, I just have no idea how to word it. Also, I think I exhausted the list of possible funding source, so I doubt there will be some kind of white knight situation at the last minute.
ct1993 Posted February 20, 2015 Author Posted February 20, 2015 I think the problem with this approach is that you aren't giving them a chance to fix it. You definitely have to be careful about how you phrase it, though. I've tried everything I can think of. I did the appeal process through the department, and didn't get anywhere. Though the project is in engineering, my POI made it clear that they don't have any funding that they could use to support me and I have had very limited success with outside sources. The department's final offer was a TA position for $19,800 per year, but I have $600 per month in loan payments for $7,200 per year. I applied for and won a $1,500 per year scholarship from the university's alumni association, but that still means trying to live on $14,100 per year in an area with fairly high living costs. I've come to realize that unless they can make an exceptionally generous offer, it just not going to work, so I'm just looking for some help declining the offer as respectfully as possible.
TakeruK Posted February 20, 2015 Posted February 20, 2015 I think the problem with this approach is that you aren't giving them a chance to fix it. You definitely have to be careful about how you phrase it, though. Right -- I was writing my response from the point of view that the OP already tried to ask for more and it was not possible. I thought the OP was asking for a case where they already know they will decline the offer and just want to say why. Definitely don't take my approach if you are still trying to get them to increase the offer!
BiochemMom Posted February 20, 2015 Posted February 20, 2015 I'd go with something like-- Dr X, Thank you for how communicative you've been with me throughout this admissions process. I am very excited about your project and the prospect of attending (university). I was happy to receive an acceptance into the program; however, due to financial reasons, I do not believe I will be able to accept the offer. I just wanted to let you know that I appreciate all you've done and I'm disappointed we won't we be able to work together on (project). Thanks again, Ct1993 Or something similar The other thing you can try--see if you can defer your admissions for a year, work full time, throw every spare cent at your loans, and renegotiate payment terms if they're not paid off by July of next year. (Can I go back in time and yell, "nooooo don't do it!!!" before you got private loans instead of federal?)
agafia Posted February 20, 2015 Posted February 20, 2015 You may be able to defer your undergraduate student loans while attending graduate school. Have you called your lender to see if this is possible? If so, you do not have to pay back your student loans until after you finish your graduate degree. You can always make payments while attending if you have the money to do so. terralily and Taeyers 2
geographyrocks Posted February 20, 2015 Posted February 20, 2015 (edited) I've tried everything I can think of. I did the appeal process through the department, and didn't get anywhere. Though the project is in engineering, my POI made it clear that they don't have any funding that they could use to support me and I have had very limited success with outside sources. The department's final offer was a TA position for $19,800 per year, but I have $600 per month in loan payments for $7,200 per year. I applied for and won a $1,500 per year scholarship from the university's alumni association, but that still means trying to live on $14,100 per year in an area with fairly high living costs. I've come to realize that unless they can make an exceptionally generous offer, it just not going to work, so I'm just looking for some help declining the offer as respectfully as possible. Are you paying on private loans? Federal loans automatically defer during graduate school. Edit: never mind. You specified that in the original post. Private loans are terrible! Edited February 20, 2015 by geographyrocks
nugget Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 (edited) Another option to consider is deferring for a year to work and put all your money towards the loan, if one year is enough time to pay it off. You might also consider getting a part time weekend job to make payments, if you could sustain that sort of workload while in grad school. Or do both suggestions and defer for a year, pay as much as possible and make smaller payments while in school through weekend employment. However the interest would accumulate considerably with smaller payments, so this might not be feasible. If you refuse the offer, remember that you got in once so you can do it again after your loan is paid off. Edited February 22, 2015 by jenste
Igotnothin Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 Congrats on the acceptance. Personal finances are very important but in this case I would strongly recommend reconsidering your decision. When I read the title of your thread and your original post I was thinking it was a scenario where you would have to pay your own way (i.e. no TA or RA, have to pay tuition). But you've got a $21,300 per year offer on the table. That's a pretty normal stipend for a PhD program. At the absolute highest you might get $30k per year. If you had multiple offers by all means I would compare the stipends and factor that in to your decision. But with one offer, $21,300 really isn't too bad, and I don't think it's so low that you should skip grad school altogether or even wait a year to reapply. I say go for it. Even if it's not quite enough to live on, you can take a small loan no problem, and pay it back once you have your PhD-level job.
Taeyers Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 But you've got a $21,300 per year offer on the table. That's a pretty normal stipend for a PhD program. At the absolute highest you might get $30k per year. Not only that, but the $30k stipends I've heard of are either from extremely selective programs or in areas where the cost of living is astronomical. We get $26k, and that's pretty good. I don't know that I would have skipped out on grad school for a year just for the chance to get a few thousand more. I don't know what field you're applying in (you say the project is in engineering, but that wording implies that you're elsewhere), but what if the stipends you're offered next year are about the same? The opportunity cost of waiting, and the direct costs of applying and interviewing again, might outweigh that chunk of change. On the other hand, if this is compounded by you not being that excited about the program in general, or maybe having the opportunity to significantly or entirely pay down the loan in a year, ignore the above. Are you paying on private loans? Federal loans automatically defer during graduate school. Edit: never mind. You specified that in the original post. Private loans are terrible! I have private loans (federal were not an option at the time) and they are also deferred for grad school.
nugget Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 (edited) I would have to disagree with the above comments. If you cannot get the interest waived during grad school, 4-5 years of interest for a private loan could take you into a considerable amount of debt, perhaps even into the 6 figure range, depending on your amount owed. I would hate for you to ruin your credit rating or potentially file for bankruptcy after grad school if your debt load becomes too difficult to manage, or to be paying off your loan for the next 20 years. Not to mention, if you have any plans to have a family sometime in the future, carrying a heavy debt load could greatly decrease your quality of living and disposable income in the future. You know what you can handle and are best to determine your priorities in life - school vs. debt. Having a PhD does not guarantee financial stability, nor does it guarantee you a job in your field, and financial considerations are important to consider when making this decision, as well as your future goals Edited February 22, 2015 by jenste
Taeyers Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 (edited) I would have to disagree with the above comments. If you cannot get the interest waived during grad school, 4-5 years of interest for a private loan could take you into a considerable amount of debt, perhaps even into the 6 figure range, depending on your amount owed. I would hate for you to ruin your credit rating or potentially file for bankruptcy after grad school if your debt load becomes too difficult to manage, or to be paying off your loan for the next 20 years. Not to mention, if you have any plans to have a family sometime in the future, carrying a heavy debt load could greatly decrease your quality of living and disposable income in the future. You know what you can handle and are best to determine your priorities in life - school vs. debt. Having a PhD does not guarantee financial stability, nor does it guarantee you a job in your field, and financial considerations are important to consider when making this decision, as well as your future goals Well, to be fair, there's a whole lot of room between having to make large payments on loans and completely ignoring them. I pay the interest on my loans every month and put a decent chunk toward the principal, but if I didn't have the money to do that for a month or two, it's absolutely not a big deal because I'm not obligated to pay. To say that deferring loan payments is a slippery slope to a 6-figure debt, ruined credit/bankruptcy, and difficulty starting a family is a bit extreme [ETA: not that it's not sometimes true, you're right, but it's up to the loan holder to act appropriately to avoid these pitfalls, and many do]. Those could be arguments against any loan deferment ever, but I think all of us who have loans can agree that it's generally a good thing for exactly the flexibility I mentioned above. Anyway, I was only mentioning it because the assumption that private loans don't defer is not necessarily true and I thought that OP could use that information. The rest of the advice operates on the premise that OP has already weighed whether or not a PhD is a good idea and decided to pursue it because it is. Like I mentioned before, all that advice should be taken with a big grain of salt if the financial aspect is not the only potential reason to turn down the offer. Edited February 22, 2015 by Taeyers
TakeruK Posted February 23, 2015 Posted February 23, 2015 But you've got a $21,300 per year offer on the table. That's a pretty normal stipend for a PhD program. At the absolute highest you might get $30k per year. If you had multiple offers by all means I would compare the stipends and factor that in to your decision. But with one offer, $21,300 really isn't too bad, and I don't think it's so low that you should skip grad school altogether or even wait a year to reapply. I say go for it. Even if it's not quite enough to live on, you can take a small loan no problem, and pay it back once you have your PhD-level job. I don't really agree, but this might be a field dependent thing? $30k/year is the standard for my field I think. We had some visiting students ask about the stipend here and mention that most programs in our field are actually offering more now (our stipend last increased to $30k/year in 2013). But the number doesn't really matter. The actual thing that matter is whether or not the stipend is enough. Most schools in my field usually offer a stipend that is enough to cover all basic living expenses plus another $3000 or so per year. I would say that in my field, if you are looking at an offer that is not at least this much, I would strongly advise you to reconsider the offer and only take it if you think there is some other benefit that outweighs a below-average financial offer.
rising_star Posted February 23, 2015 Posted February 23, 2015 Every time I see you post those numbers, TakeruK (and this goes for Eigen too, btw), I think that I'm in the wrong field. Stipends approaching $30K are unheard of in my field. The highest I know of right now is in the low-20s, and that's in a place with a fairly high cost of living. At any rate, you turn down an offer for financial reasons the same way you turn down any other offer. You just tell them that you're going to decline and you do it politely. If someone inquires for more information, then you could say that the stipend wasn't going to be sufficient for you. I actually did tell a school that once and they basically said that they already knew that but were hoping I'd find a way to make it work.
GeoDUDE! Posted February 23, 2015 Posted February 23, 2015 For what its worth, I had a 35k a year offer in a town where living alone would have been 600 a month. Its definitely possible to get that type of offer in my field if you apply to a private school in an area where there is a low cost of living. I think its wise to be weary of your debt. You should contact your loan officers to see if you can defer your loans. Goodluck.
ct1993 Posted February 25, 2015 Author Posted February 25, 2015 Thank you to everyone who answered. I think Biochem Mom's response was most along the lines of what I was looking for. Although the stipend was reasonable for my field (physics), I have decided not to attend because I really can't take on any more debt right now.
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