Application anxiety

[EvelynD]

Hey guys! 

A couple of months ago I decided I was going to go for a PhD in the states (I'm from the Netherlands). I did a lot of research on this forum and elswhere, contacted universities etc, and everything was looking great. Then I got hired at my new fulltime job (which I decided to quit after 2 months because of three horrible managers) at started working fulltime, putting my PhD plans on the shelve a bit. But since I read that september would be a good moment to 'get real' and start writing and preparing, I'm getting back in the application saddle this weekend and start picking up where I left.

However, I am feeling quite scared! I have to plan my Toefl and GRE, mail my professors for letters of reccomendation, create a coherent timeline so I know when to turn in things, contact schools again, ect, and I feel really nervous thinking about all this. I don't even know why, I like these kind of challenges but at this moment I feel a slight panic creeping in. I think it might be because I remember my application for a semester in Mexico, and all the things went that wrong initially. For example, a thought that is going through my mind right now is 'what if I come across something on the schools' application page that I cannot provide them with?'

I think it will be a good idea to go to the library tomorrow and print all the information I have collected, and in fact writing this down kinda calms me down. But can someone reassure me that these pinic-like feelings are normal, and that most people experience this? Good thing I only have cherries in my fridge right now, stress eating here I come!
 

[rising_star]

Why would you need to contact schools a second time? Is there information you didn't get the first time that you now want/need in order to apply?

In general, a timeline isn't that hard. Work backwards from your earliest deadline and take it from there. Make sure you put ample time into writing, rewriting, editing, and revising your statement of purpose and writing sample because those are some of the most crucial parts of your application. And, as an international student, investigate now whether you'll need an outside agency to verify/credential (I can't think of the exact word) your college transcript so you can get that done early on.

[EvelynD]

Well I contacted four different possible poi's in May, and two in particular asked me to keep in touch during the application process. I don't know how literal I should take this, because in The Netherlands this literally mean you'd have to keep in touch. Next to that I need to check of my grades have to be converted, kinda like you said! 

I think my main fear is that during the application process I will find things on the uni's website that I can't provide them with, like a transcript of my pets tax payments from 1998 or something like that (finding out that I lack something making me unable to apply) 

 

 

[fuzzylogician]

Yeah, this is normal. You are definitely not the first to worry about his or her application or to find the whole thing a bit overwhelming. I find that a good way to get over anxiety is to do things. Knowledge is power, and getting stuff done is better than worrying about what might happen and not knowing. So one thing you can (and should) do is start collecting the information that you need.

If you don't know where you're applying, the first step is to figure that out. If you have at least a partial list of schools already, great! Go on each of their websites and start collecting the requirements they each need. You'll discover that they aren't that different from one another, but there are also details that are worth being aware of. For example, they will each ask for a TOEFL score, but may have a different minimum. They will want a SOP, but the length might be different. Same for the writing sample. They will want LORs. Some will say exactly three, some may say at least two, or give you the option of having a fourth and fifth. So you want to think about who you can ask for letters. Schools will also want transcripts; some may want two copies, some may want an official copy now, some may be fine with a scan for now and will only want an official one if/when you accept an offer from them. Collect that information so you can order the transcripts. I don't think it's common for programs to ask for transcripts from well-known European schools to be validated, but you would want to know now if that were a requirement anywhere. Some may ask for an additional one-off essay or document: a personal history statement, a diversity statement, a list of courses in your major, etc. This is a lot to take in, so create a spreadsheet or list, whatever works for you, to keep track of everything. 

Deadlines will be somewhere between early December to late January. Look up holidays in the US to know when you might expect people to be away, in case you have questions. Roughly in September, schools will open their application software for the new cycle. Mid-Sepetmber/October might therefore be a good time to create profiles for yourself on each relevant application (caution: if you start too soon, in some cases you may still be looking at last year's application! so watch out for that). Give yourself time to figure out any kinks, so you're not stuck with a problem at the last minute. Click through the entire thing to see what the application requires; sometimes you'll see it's slightly different from what's on the website, or there might be essay questions for you to fill out. Also keep in mind that some applications will let you send letter prompts to letter writers as soon as you add them to the system, but some (annoyingly!) only send the prompt after you submit on your end, so you'll need to take that into account and work on those applications earlier to leave your recommenders enough time. I know that this is a lot, but removing (or minimizing) the unknowns will help, I promise. It's always more stressful to sit and worry than to do something. 

 

[EvelynD]

Thank you for your extensive reply! This week I have tried to tackly my nerves by gathering all the application information in a new notebook, and it made me feel a lot better! I'm collecting the same information from all the schools I want to apply at to see if something sticks out that needs extra attention, and I'm trying to understand how the funding at the different schools work. This is the most difficult aspect for me to understand because some schools aren't really concrete in how students are funded (or I don't understand how it works). I aim to collect all the questions that I have for each school and sends those to their administration people, hopefully I'll get some answers soon! 

[fuzzylogician]

I'm glad to hear that you are feeling better! What kinds of questions do you have about funding?

[Almaqah Thwn]

4 hours ago, EvelynD said:

Thank you for your extensive reply! This week I have tried to tackly my nerves by gathering all the application information in a new notebook, and it made me feel a lot better! I'm collecting the same information from all the schools I want to apply at to see if something sticks out that needs extra attention, and I'm trying to understand how the funding at the different schools work. This is the most difficult aspect for me to understand because some schools aren't really concrete in how students are funded (or I don't understand how it works). I aim to collect all the questions that I have for each school and sends those to their administration people, hopefully I'll get some answers soon! 

Yeah, schools will do that. A good way to get a ballpark estimate is to check the grad school results from previous years. People will often mention how much funding they got when they were admitted and generally it stays relatively the same (Although, it can change). I got into two MA programs- one at Brandeis in NEJS and one at Cornell in Archaeology. When I met with the professor at Brandeis, he mentioned funding but did not give me too much details on his own, so I tried to estimate from the grad school results, but it still ended up being more expensive than I expected by like $40,000. For Cornell, I had no clue and had to ask the professor outright what the funding situation was and she was more than happy to help, as assistantships were not on their page anywhere (albeit external funding for archaeological work was).

 

It's also funny how the Ivy League school ended up being cheaper by like $60,000 than Brandeis. That just goes to show that one should not assume a program is necessarily cheaper or more expensive based on reputation. 

 

My suggestion would be to scour the program pages for anything you can find and if you can't find it, email the professor and formulate your response in such a way that  shows you read the program's website (E. G. "I was wondering about... but couldn't find anything on the website"). From my past experiences, professors generally treat students as though they have not read thoroughly the website (I'm assuming they get a lot of generic emails out of the blue or just have a lot of the same things to say that their website does, but I've never actually asked one about it) and when I showed that I had taken the time to read the webpage, the professors seemed to have respected that. 

Also: really important for your sanity: as tempting as it may be to look at student's CVs in the programs in which you are interested, look at them only as much as necessary to formulate your own CV. It's really easy to obssess over whether or not you are skilled or qualified or have good enough research interests to get into a specific program when you start comparing yourself to students who are already in those programs. Furthermore, the insanely qualified students tend to stick in your head as the gold standard by which all grad students are accepted, and not the one who is more like you. So, keep yourself from that, it'll drive you nuts and just impair your ability to focus on things on which you actually need to be focusing. 

Edited August 22, 2016 by Almaqah Thwn

[EvelynD]

22 hours ago, fuzzylogician said:

I'm glad to hear that you are feeling better! What kinds of questions do you have about funding?

I don't always understand what different options there are for funding and where to find this information. For example, this is a link to the 'awards and fuding' page of the U of Colorado's sociology graduate studies page: http://www.colorado.edu/sociology/students/graduate-students/awards-funding. It states that there are sources for funding from within the university, but you have to apply yourself for all the different scholarships. I thought that if a uni accepts you, they make a financial offer (that is what I've been reading on this forum). But if I look at a page like this it seems that you have to apply for the PhD, ánd apply for scholarships at the same time. Is that correct, or am I mistaken? 

Its not like I don't want to do this, but it feels a bit overwhelming to have to arrange the application and then the funding separately.   

 

[fuzzylogician]

Yes, usually PhD students receive a stipend that covers tuition and living expenses, plus some benefits (crucially, health insurance, which can be very expensive in the US if not fully covered by your employer and is different than in Europe so is worth reading up on in general). Here is what I found on the website you linked to: 

Most students receive financial support by working as teaching assistants. In general, this funding covers tuition and a portion of the cost of health insurance and includes a monthly stipend. As teaching assistants, students are responsible for a variety of duties including grading papers and exams, helping to design assignments, holding office hours, and leading recitation sections. More advanced students can receive funding as research assistants or graduate part-time instructors.The Graduate Teacher Program supports graduate students in teaching endeavors by offering college teacher training, supporting research skill development, and providing career preparation opportunities. The Office of Financial Aid also offers financial support for graduate students. 

So my understanding is that if you are admitted, there will be funding for you. Working as a TA or instructor is generally the most time-consuming, so if you can receive some kind of competitive fellowship or be selected to work as an RA, that is usually better for your productivity. (And instructors of record will generally be paid more than TAs.) The scholarships you linked to are partly ones you apply to in later years as a student and some are external (competitive) ones. They may help with funding your dissertation research, or sometimes you can use them to stay at your program an extra year, which can be helpful in some cases. You aren't required to apply for them, but you should probably try because it's worth the effort. But I don't believe that you need to get something like that or you won't be funded. 

[EvelynD]

THank you so much! I was switching between the sociology and anthropology pages (I also haven't decided yet which one I'll go for) and at the anthro page I found similar information. It seems that I might just be freaking out a bit, probably because you want to have everything under control and know all the information at the same time, instead of letting yourself 'grow into' this process. Nah, for now I'm just gonna blame being an international student