BunnyWantsaPhD

I'm not sure what you're seeing that I'm not seeing, but on the results board I only see a bunch of wait listers (including myself), one rejection, and no acceptances. Am I missing something? My guess is that you could be in any of the three categories since today is the first day they've sent out anything (from what I can tell)...

Definitely don't email them or contact them. From what you described, if he said that he was reviewing your application, that's what he meant--your application is still being looked at. It doesn't seem like the missing letter is a big deal because he said if you were admitted you could just submit it later.

It's a bummer that advice from people who have been around the block can be taken in that way, but I definitely understand how one's tone can come off differently than their intentions. I'm only trying to be helpful here. When I was straight outta undergrad (which I'm not sure if you are or not, but I'm not just speaking to you), I would have appreciated the help from others who had done this already. You have to understand that for those of us who have applied, and know what it's like to be rejected, we've gained some perspective about our own worth and when and whether to freak out or not. I stand by what I say--early Feb. is too early to freak out. I don't see how that comes across as bullying or discouraging, as you've implied. I'm not disillusioned or frustrated. I'm happy to be seeking the path I am and I feel more prepared than I did in the past. I'm trying to help calm the anxiety that I think this website is exacerbating through comments like "why haven't they notified us yet?!?!" ....take it as you will, but I'm not trying to be patronizing.

You're right, and I agree even if it doesn't seem like I do. I understand the freaking out bit, because I am worried about not getting in anywhere also. But, what I don't get is people upset over the fact that they haven't heard anything yet--the departments might not be done yet and that's why they haven't gotten to you. They're not trying to be evil. It is also very early to be worried that you haven't received anything yet. There is a distinction between being worried that you're not going to get in anywhere, and being upset over the fact that you haven't heard anything yet. It is relatively early in the process, so I think realizing that will help people calm their nerves. That's all I'm trying to say.

I don't think other people are really being uncivil--they're just trying to give everyone some perspective. If anything, saying something to the degree of "if people want to say the opposite of what I'm saying, they should start a different thread" is uncivil. I tend to agree with the people you seem to be condemning. What I mean is, while I certainly agree that this is a place to share anxieties, it does seem to be a little bit off-base to be so frantic at this point when it really is the beginning of the results season. So, I think it's okay to be anxious while waiting, but it does seem a bit silly to think "why aren't they getting back to us by now?!?!?!"....they aren't getting back to us because they aren't done yet. Usually mid-March is the time to really start having these feelings. Maybe because this is my third round of applications I'm feeling a bit different. Typically gradcafe turns me off because everyone is getting an acceptance and I'm not, but this time around it's turning me off because everyone is freaking out and it's still so early. I'm sure this is coming off as rude, but I do wish people would try to be a bit more rational at this point...

I was trying to exactly what you said--be empathetic (I mentioned how the schools don't really care about our sanity, which I thought was implying that I, too, am going crazy by this process). Also, I thought you were being more literal in your questions in terms of "what does it mean that two people got results and they're both different?!"...I thought you really wanted an answer to that question and the answer is that we don't know what results are out there. While it's obviously okay to "freak out" about waiting to hear results, it also helps to put some things in perspective, which I was trying to help you with. As far as what their letters contained, I'm sure it was some generic "we're happy to have you. we'll notify you soon about funding (or here is the funding information now." or for the waitlister "we'd love to have you, but there's so many great candidates, blah blah)." I mean, there's probably not much different in the letters than what we'd expect them to say. Anyways, just trying to be helpful, not hurtful.

You do realize that not everyone who applies to grad school is on this website, or even if they are they might not post results (some are just lurkers). Not trying to be rude, just trying to get peeps to chill out. And yes, you're right--the schools don't have any respect for sanity. They get the results out when it works for them. Some of them never even send rejection letters. Also, the two people who got responses from Vanderbilt likely don't know anything more than what their letters tell them.

Typically people agree that these are different types of relationships: 1) friends 2) friends with benefits 3) random hookups (meet someone in a bar, etc) 4) casual dating (usually means more than the above by including going on actual dates, being interested in each other for more than sex, but not interested in something long-term/serious) 5) in a relationship (there are stages to this that include dating, but ultimately people are committed and exclusive and expect it to go somewhere). I don't see why this is so complicated to agree upon.

Loric is known to troll on this website. So, he/she was trying to upset people by indirectly calling me a hobag (which is just a ridiculous comment that doesn't deserve a response).

The 310 is definitely for the new scoring system. It would be wayyyy too easy to get a 310 combined score on the old system--schools would look silly for having such a low minimum bar set. Place usually explicitly state that they're talking about the new scorings system. Also, Duke has a minimum combined score.... I believe.

You're silly. You can totally have a casual relationship and call it dating without it being just a hookup or looking for something more serious. I've been hanging out with a guy for about a month now, but he knows that I'll probably be moving in a few months so we know it's not going to be more serious. That doesn't mean that we're not going to continue to hang out and it doesn't mean that I'm sleeping around with random people. There are shades of grey here...

I agree with Gnome here. I guess whether or not dating sucks depends on what you're looking for. If you're looking for a serious relationship, then yeah, the beginning parts aren't so great. But, if you're looking to just hang out with someone--get dinner, drink some wine, etc etc, then it can be quite fun. That's not saying there aren't ups and downs, but generally yes I do like dating. Relationships, at this point in my life, give me the heebie jeebies. I don't want to have to plan my life around someone else. No gracias.

Thanks!

This is the craziest thread. I'm trying to convince myself not to respond, but after reading all of the posts (well, actually I slowed down around page 12, because, come on) it's hard not to. It's really hard to not come across as condescending on this thread, but the OP really needs a reality check. If you really think EVERY day about how to get a man/ the fact that you hate being alone, I think you're in for a rude awakening once you get married. YOUR HUSBAND IS NOT GOING TO COMPLETE YOU. YOU WILL STILL FEEL LONELY SOMETIMES. That's why those 1950s housewives started the feminist revolution! They were bored out of their minds and felt trapped! They didn't feel intellectually stimulated or appreciated. If that's your end goal (to be a housewife), which is fine, I highly encourage you to read some history books on feminism first--just so you can get some perspective, not to deter you from being a wife/mother. You just seem to idealize the 50s when they actually weren't so ideal. To reiterate what others have said--if you are not happy by yourself, then you need to make it your priority to figure out how to be happy by yourself. You're in your early 20s--go get a job, travel, have fun, date casually, learn about the world and yourself a little bit more before you settle down with someone else. It sounds like you don't even know much about yourself. I understand the end-goal of wanting a marriage/children, but that will (possibly) eventually be the rest of your life. So, until then, make sure you live your life to the fullest. You do realize that once you have kids you're life is full of taking care of them, right? I mean you have to live your life around a baby's schedule--that means it's harder to get a decent night's sleep, it's harder to travel, it's harder to freaking go to the mall when you want because you have to lug around a baby. Don't get me wrong, I want kids, but I'm fully aware of what that means--it doesn't seem like you are... Also in my experience (I've finished my MA), everyone who was in a relationship as a grad student in my cohort would tell me that they were jealous that I was single. They had to make decisions about jobs, moving, etc, heck even about when to eat dinner, based on their partner. Whereas I got to do whatever I want whenever I want. Even if they hadn't said anything, I would not be jealous that they are married. Grad school took up so much of my time that at the end of the day I didn't want to have to work around someone else's schedule. I just wanted to relax and do whatever I wanted to do. It's worth considering the benefits of being single--that's all I'm trying to say here. One girl that I knew sounded exactly like you do and you know what? SHE HATED GRAD SCHOOL. All she would talk about was how she wanted to drop out and find a husband. Whenever she went to a party she'd be mad that she didn't meet her future husband. She was crazy desperate and no man wanted to go near her. She did wind up finishing her master's and even got a fully-funded PhD offer. In between accepting the PhD offer, she met a guy online and chose to drop out of school and get married. I'm not saying that she made the wrong choice by dropping out, but I will say that I think she made the wrong choice by going to grad school at all in the first place. You can meet men anywhere! Grad school, jobs, the mall, parties--you don't need to get a degree if you don't TRULY want it. You said it yourself--you want to be a 1950s housewife. So, maybe you need to move to the South and get a job till you find a man. (Man is it hard not to be rude here, but I swear I'm being serious with my advice). Btw, I'm almost 28 and will (hopefully) be starting a PhD program next year. I love where I am in my life. I'm independent, single, well-travelled, casually dating, and about to start a PhD, which has been my dream all my life (which is something that you need to think about--a lot of people on this website have wanted to be in grad school for a long time, and for good reasons. So, when you talk about how it is basically a place to find a husband or how it is your second choice to being a stay at home mom, that's the equivalent of us saying that school didn't work out so I guess we'll get married. See how bad of an attitude that is to have going into a marriage?). I've actually said since I was 19 or so that I didn't even want to get married till I was 35 because I wanted to be my own person first. Now, I also thought I'd be done with my PhD by the time I was 28, so life doesn't work out how you plan it (though looks like I will be ready for a husband around 35 after my PhD just like I though). But, I wouldn't change a thing! Based on your posts, (and I know people have already said this, but I spent time reading this thread damnit so I am going to write it anyway!) I think you would do yourself a great service by NOT thinking about finding a man. Instead, hang out with some friends, travel, and read some books (on feminism, please--I know that's snarky, but seriously, do it). If you have no intention of doing any of these things, no intention of truly trying to be happy on your own and learning about yourself, then I really don't think that grad school is going to be a great choice for you. If you really think that anyone who is nearing age 30 or older is not happy if they are not married/having kids, then it's pretty clear that you would prefer that over this career path. Like others have said, I really don't think you understand graduate school or what the good reasons are behind going to graduate school. Personally, I would want to date someone who IS in their 30s and with a graduate degree, not the opposite. Okay, I'm basically repeating what others have said. This thread made my head hurt. I feel like writing a book about it.

I'm sure this has been addressed before, but anyone have any advice on how to make sure the department has received all of your materials? The websites say that they have received everything, but I just got a call from a department that said I was missing materials. So, now I'm worried that the other application websites are faulty as well...I applied to like 10 places, so I hate to call each one and bother them. Ugh.

you should win an award for the most appropriate gif ever...seriously, it made my day

I second the above advice. Also, you can check out other MA theses online if you want to see what a range of introductions can look like. Mine happened to be approximately 20 pages for an approximately 140 page thesis.

While I agree with ComeBackZinc that it is kind of early to start thinking about these things, I would also add that there are some things that you can do that will help you figure out your interests more while also preparing yourself for grad school/the application process. The one piece of advice that I wish I was given was to take classes with people who specialize in my area of interest. For example, I study Victorian literature and knew that I wanted to in grad school. Turns out that my undergrad institution is known for this specialization, and I had no idea till I graduated. I just happened to take a class with the leading expert in this specialization, and had I known how significant that was, I would have tried to do better in his class and get a letter of recommendation from him. Maybe other people know to do this, but I had no idea. The other thing you can do is to to try to write papers on a specific topic of interest in your various classes. For example, if you're interested in gender studies, you could always write from a feminist theory lens so that you're "trying out" these ideas and building a knowledge base from which to draw. The more you work in a speciality, the more likely you are going to be able to have a strong writing sample that demonstrates you know what is going on in that field. Given your varying interests, it's important to take varying classes and speak to your professors/advisors about your options. If you want to combine French/English literature you could always go to grad school for comparative literature. Most likely in graduate school you'll get the opportunity to teach composition classes, even if you're not in a comp/rhet program (most English MA programs will have you do this). So, getting an MA is also something to think about--it will help you figure out what you want to do for the PhD and give you teaching experiences to see if it is really something you want to pursue anyway. To reiterate what ComeBackZinc was getting at: the job market for humanities PhDs is horrendous. If there is anything else, LITERALLY ANYTHING ELSE, you can see yourself doing then do it. If you spend enough time on this website, you'll find that many people talk about getting a tenure-track job is basically the same as winning the lottery. Maybe it's not that extreme, but it certainly feels like it.

Thanks for the advice! Would you mind looking at my statement? Also, thanks for the hilarious emoticon idea. If all else fails, I will have to go that route...even though you said not to ; )

I'm willing to help! ....anything to help me procrastinate ; )

Understandable. No worries...well, there were lots of worries for a few minutes, but thank god for the internetz!

WOAH WOAH woah. You just freaked me out. The application for the PhD in English at U of Michigan is due on December 15th--so it hasn't passed yet. Am I reading the website wrong?

I'm including my abstract from my thesis so that the readers know where it fits in the larger context of the thesis itself. I also really like my abstract, so that's why I'm putting it there too. I don't see why it would be a bad thing...

question: should I mention my 8 semesters of teaching experience? Just writing out that I've taught that long seems like it should be significant enough to mention, but since it's on my CV I didn't know if I really needed to talk about it...

I'm glad I'm not the only one who feel this way! At least Thanksgiving will hopefully make us so full that we'll forget there is anything else going on in the world (if only it were more than one day!).