rising_star

They aren't going to check nor will they care.

If Duke is the better fit, then go to Duke. Simple as that, provided the money is good and you like the potential advisor and lab.

britboi04, it strikes me that you should probably branch out and start to explore some of the more positive sides of where you live. Yes, people have and will always call it a blackhole. But, it doesn't have to be. For a town its size, it has far more cultural and outdoor opportunities than you would find in most other places (trust me, I've lived in both). There are a lot of hidden gems, particularly away from campus, but you have to be willing to explore. And honestly, that will be the case anywhere you live. So, I recommend that if you stay where you are, you make new friends that are from elsewhere and use them to help give you a new perspective on the town. They will want to see and do things that you may not have heard or thought of in the past. And, keep in mind, you could move to a big city and find it just as isolating and difficult to do things as a small town based on transportation, cost, etc.

Will dropping the class cause you to not earn your diploma? If you will still graduate, then it doesn't matter whether you stay in the course or not.

Well, it depends on your career goals. If you want to teach, then you should be a TA in graduate school to gain classroom and curriculum experience. Teaching isn't the most natural thing for most people and being a TA multiple times gives you a chance to get better at it. It also depends on how closely related to your research the RA position is. If you're an urban sociologist interested in race and social stratification, you may not want to be a RA on a historical sociology project, you know? The chance for publications will vary from one project to the next, so it would be something to inquire about before you take the position.

I would look into a UK or UK-style program where all you do at the PhD level is write a dissertation.

I'm debt-averse. So, I'd stay where you are and get the degree there. Why? First, because the work experience and promotion will be invaluable experience that will prepare and qualify you for similar and better positions elsewhere. Second, because degrees in higher education are rarely funded.

Keep in mind that I don't think you should buy any of this until you actually arrive at your university because either 1) you don't want to move it or 2) it may be available through your university/department for free, in which case you could save yourself some money. - Referencing software (check with the university library and the department to see if there are any discounts or if its freely available. Lots of schools have RefWorks or EndNoteWeb for free, the only downside is that you have to be online to use them). - portable hard drive of at least 160GB - flash drive of at least 2GB - calendars, both weekly agenda style and monthly - bookshelf - large binders - file folders - looseleaf notebook paper - a few spiral notebooks (not for classes but for keeping projects organized) - netbook - digital camera of decent quality

Hmmm... that's cool. It must be new because I remember repeatedly being told you couldn't do that. Now, I'll have to track down all of those Amazon.com receipts and figure out which were for courses and which were for research. That could be more trouble than it's worth. P.S. I love how that wording basically makes it so that if you took online courses, the provision doesn't apply to you. Nice touch, IRS.

Yes, it's common. They want to recruit you.

That's interesting that you even get an option. In my program, everyone works .50 time. Most weeks, you don't have to put in the full 20 hours but, depending on the assignment, you may find yourself putting in 45 hours in one week (yes, I actually did this!). It really does depend.

I only wish this were true. The tax folks at three different universities have assured me that it's not. Sorry! To address the question on state residency, it depends on the university. Some will require you to establish in-state residency because it saves them money on the tuition remission. In other states, it's impossible for you to become an in-state resident for tuition purposes even if you change your voter and vehicle registrations and get a new driver's license. So, I'd ask the program what most students do.

@zilch, not necessarily. My mom started her PhD program right after I was born and I never really knew she was in grad school until around the time she was finishing (I was ~8 or 9 then). It probably helped that my dad had a professional full-time job and my mom had a fellowship so she wasn't gone all the time. As far as I was concerned, she dropped us off at school, picked us up and made snacks, went on school trips, etc. And, after my parents got divorced, there were some financial struggles but I associated those more with the divorce than with my mother being in graduate school (plus, my mom got a full-time job her final year of writing to support us). Obviously, it varies from household to household.

I'm not a parent but I thought I'd chime in on what I know people in my program are doing. At least one male PhD student is the primary caregiver for their son, with his wife working ~30 hours/week. This means that she's the primary breadwinner. Another female PhD student has a husband that works part-time and they share childcare responsibilities. Yes, this means that you (the male) may not be the primary breadwinner but, given the flexibility of many graduate schedules, it may be possible to work out an arrangement where you and your partner share childcare and each work part-time (you on a 20hr/wk assistantship, your partner working the equivalent or slightly more hours per week).

I would email the grad secretary and/or DGS and ask if they anticipate additional funding opportunities becoming available in the upcoming months and ask about the feasibility of getting an assistantship in another department or office on campus.

My high school English teachers got a kick out of me being a literature major in college, mostly because I never read the books assigned for class. My first year of college, I had a prof for my first-year writing course tell me that I was incapable of writing at the collegiate level, and should drop out. I did graduate from there, earn a MA, and am now doing well in my PhD program. I plan to send that professor a copy of my diploma once I get my PhD, even though I doubt he will remember me.

Maybe I'm missing something here but is it really inappropriate for someone to leave their spouse for a graduate student? Firled, did you know anything about the state of the marriage that ended? I only ask because at my MA program there is a professor who married his former graduate student. While some may think that the relationship with the grad student led to the dissolution of the marriage, it was actually more complicated than that. The prof's (now ex-)wife was unhappy, moved a few states away, waited for him to get promoted to full professor and receive a salary raise, then promptly filed for divorce. So, I guess my point to Firled and everyone else is that we may not be in the position to pass judgment on what others do.

I would say that you are interested in learning from other academics and working with new people, and that you are fully exploring all of your options to ensure that you choose the right program for you. I would not tell them that you were rejected from the PhD program at your current school (btw, is it common for that to happen? Can you ask your school why you didn't get in?).

The last day for them to notify is probably the first day of fall classes... It is possible to get offers after April 15, even for programs that don't do rolling admissions.

Nope, I've never asked or heard of anyone asking. I paid for the move to my MA program and the cross-country move to my PhD program out of pocket. This may vary by field though since the programs in my field fund all students and give all students the same amount of funding so if one person were to get moving funds, everyone would which is likely to be unaffordable to the program.

I know the spring break at all of my universities (BA, MA, PhD) has not meant that administrators aren't working. I think oldlady and I have had opposite experiences here. My professors do work over Spring Break, though it may not be in terms of reading applications. They also expect me to do work, in addition to doing work of their own. I'll probably take a total of 3 days off, out of the 9 days we have.

ASK THEM! They are the ones that can tell you if funding decisions will come later or separately or whatever. Good luck!

I would be asking questions about what fellowships/scholarships/awards their students have gotten, whether and where there students publish and present, and the time to completion for those students.

You just ask. They understand why you're asking so ask. As always, be polite. And, if you're asking about the younger prof, ask if s/he would take students with him/her if/when s/he leaves the university.

The FAFSA doesn't work the same way in graduate school. If your department is paying you as a TA/RA or has you on fellowship, filing the FAFSA will not affect the amounts you or others in your department receive. It makes you eligible for federal subsidized and unsubsidized loans mostly.