poco_puffs

I have no answers (though I dig ratiocinator's response), but I can certainly say that I have dealt with what seems like a bewildering amount of theory and terminology and the simultaneous experience of never finding an accurate/existant phrase for the idea rattling around in my head. Something of a tangential side-rant: As much as I'm drawn to the lit and the theory, every time I try to dig into Postcolonialism/Globalization there always seems to be some author, some text, some context that I'm missing and I lose my confidence instead of driving forward. It's all THERE, but at the same time it feels very elusive. Even Ania Loomba's "Colonialism/Postcolonialism," which is supposed to be an introductory text as far as I can tell, feels like we're joining a conversation that has been going on for thirty years and no one can really do an efficient job of summing it all up while still doing it justice. Then, THEN, when I feel like I've got some sort of grip on the ideas, I try to stand on my own two critical feet and make some conjectures, but it turns out that some essay I read a week later refutes everything I just said, or someone said the exact thing but twenty years ago and far better than I ever could. Or a professor just gives me a blank stare and has no idea what I'm trying to say-- like my idea is so trite or unfounded that they can't even respond to it verbally. It's challenging, for sure. Gotta love it, though. Right? Btw, I would totally read an essay about geographic existentialism. That sounds legit AND interesting

Sidenote: Is this the policy at most graduate institutions? No part-time jobs on the side?

The Engish PhD program at UO received something like 320 applications for this last round, which was up from something like 180-200 applications the year before (those numbers might be off by a dozen or so). As far as I know, they offered admissions to 20-25 people, with the expectation of an incoming class of 12-13 people. They accept students with interests all over the board, but their "Structured Emphasis" programs offer special certificates/degrees in areas like Medieval Lit, Rhet/Comp, Literature and the Environment etc. Those special programs within the department mean there are more classes, more faculty, and more of an academic community surrounding each of those fields, and they receive a higher proportion of applications from students interested in those areas. An Ivy League school might have a higher "ranking," but the choices of students do often boil down to the fit of the program, its funding, its faculty etc. I spoke to students who were entertaining offers from several other reputable top-10/15 schools. As for the quality of the teachers that Oregon produces, I had heard that several times before I visited the campus. Talking with several grad students and professors within the department, it seems like the program really does place a lot of value on a supportive and engaging program for training future instructors. You'll get a few terms of training before they throw you in front of a class, then lots of time to hone your skills, some workshops and weekly forums to provide ongoing support and community, and eventually opportunities to design and propose your own courses. FWIW, I haven't heard any horror stories of grad students getting overloaded on their teaching responibilities, either. I think it's a program that is very focused on making you an attractive candidate for future hiring.

I saw plenty of acceptances on the results search a few weeks ago, so I know there are some GCers out there who are interested in the program. If you're one of the lucky ones, are you planning on attending the Open House this Thursday/Friday? What's your field? How is this school stacking up against your other acceptances?

My one and only acceptance is to University of Oregon, barring any last minute additions. My field is English literature of the long 19th century, with an emphasis on representations of empire-- especially in relation to regions/ethnicities that don't exactly fit into the colonial mold. My sweet baby pet project at the moment is the evolution of national sympathy/distrust toward the Balkans, as manifested in popular literature and travel writing. Yum!

Read Moby Dick during apps and loved the flipping hell out of it. Currently working through Middlemarch and my short attention span is causing me problems--I find myself reading a chapter twice, because I haven't hit my stride yet. Also working on a random novel I picked up by Frank Herbert of Dune fame; it's called The White Plague and it's crazazy. I *was* reading Madame Bovary, but I've been so mopey and anxious lately that I had to put it down or risk making myself worse. Ditto The Handmaid's Tale being a favorite. Now that I have my first (and possibly only) acceptance, I need to get back on the academic reading horse and start studying again.

I come from a state school whose reputation revolves more around Agriculture and Engineering than English, and at no point during my education did anyone ever ask or suggest that I do an honors/senior thesis for English. I did, however, double major in English and History, and as a capstone of my History degree I had to complete a "seminar paper." In the English department, I just took my required course load + a ton of others and revamped my favorite paper from a relevant class for the writing sample. None of my professors said anything negative about my qualifications going into the process (3.9 GPA, V 720, Q660 AW 5.0 Subject 660) and I even had a lot of compliments on the writing sample, so I was perhaps a little over-confident going into the process. Although I have one acceptance so far, I feel that I am on radio silence with the rest of the schools that I feel are a better fit and offer better prospects. I might be lagging behind the people who completed a senior thesis, who pushed harder for essay awards, who paid the fee to get into that Phi Beta Kappa whatsit organization that I always got the letters for but was TOO DAMN FOOL to chuck up $75 or whatever for it. Coulda woulda shoulda.

I picked English, and I bet you'll get an email in the next day or two.

Got my first notification of ANY sort from Duke today, via form rejection on the website. Why is it a relief, you ask? Because I apparently feel a whole lot better knowing my status than drifting in some foggy limbo of misguided hope. In my head, it seemed like everyone was getting notifications but me. The school email that I'm currently using does not have a junk mail folder, so the complete lack of word from schools made me worry that everything was being directed to the non-existent junk-mail folder and thus into another foggy limbo parallel to the one I was occupying. I resisted the urge to email my school tech support people, though (so proud of myself), and today my irrational fears were blown aside by Duke's little downer. For those of you swimming in acceptances, I congratulate you wholeheartedly. For the others who are a.) swimming in rejections or b.) not swimming in notifications at all, I vote we get some fresh air, eat some good chocolate, stop checking our emails 30k times a day, and get our heads out of this crazy psychological maze.

I was trying to play Oblivion, but found it much less addicting/distracting than Fallout 3. I also cut my 4 movie a day habit down to two or three episodes of various shows a day streaming on Netflix or Hulu (Farscape, Skins, Lost...). I need to spend more time outside, and exercising, and eating better. On the plus side, my house cleaning has gone through the roof and I've made my way through a couple of the classics (Middlemarch right now!) and some early Russian history. Efforts to craft result in visits to the craft store, and a growing pile of supplies, but very few finished products. I'm going absolutely batty.

I was also curious about that lonely, lonely admit listed on Results Search. I haven't heard anything from any of my schools yet, and Vanderbilt was definitely near the top of my list.

Plenty of anxiety/depression for me. At the moment, I know I could find something else to work with if I don't get in-- but I can also imagine the mind-games I'd play with myself with a lap full of rejection letters. I haven't heard ANYTHING yet. Here's the kicker: If I get accepted and move somewhere, I'm not sure if my live-in boyfriend of 4 years wil be coming across the country with me. I figure it at somewhere around 50/50 right now. If I get rejected everywhere, we'll probably move to a new city together and start looking for some real work. Even though I know in my heart that this is my dream, the emotions that I have all wrapped up in the idea of moving away from family, friends, my hometown and my boyfriend almost have me more scared of the acceptances than the rejections. And then the logic trumps the fear for a day or two, and I go back to reality and optimism for a while.

Just a note: The Victorian Studies website at Indiana is giving a weird error message at the moment. I emailed some tech people and got a very lovely response from Andrew Miller, the director of the Victorian Studies program who said that the website would be down for a few weeks for an overhaul and if anyone had any questions about site content or the program they should email him directly. On one hand, I'm happy to know that they're constantly working to improve their websites, and that the VS program is obviously getting time and attention. I'm also worried, though, that an "overhaul" will take some of the personality away from the website. I remember there being some formatting problems where pictures and text columns didn't line up exactly right, but that was such an inconsequential problem sitting next to the overall strenght of the website. It wasn't as polished or professional looking as some websites, but the personality of the backgrounds and extra touches was half of the appeal.

I can't even begin to fathom the time it took to polish fit paragraphs in 15 or 20 or even 30 statements of purpose. Or the money it cost to send out test scores. I probably considered 25 or 30 schools at the very beginning of research, but ended up planning for 8 and dropping 1 at the last minute for the grand total of 7 complete applications. I feel pretty confident about the fit at each of those, and I'm hoping for at least 2 acceptances so that I have something of a choice when the time comes.

The wide range of interests within their Victorian specialty is what made Indiana SO appealing to me. Their website for the Victorian Studies program seemed so... well, warm? Like if I got in to the program, there'd be a nice little place for my particular interests alongside everyone elses research. Even though the rest of the Indiana site was a little stark and/or confusing in most places, the page for the Victorian stuff was a strong selling point for me. Just felt a little more lived-in, you know?

I'm feeling particularly noobish today, and I'm coming to the (hopefully correct) realization that "Indiana" means the one at Bloomington and not some other Indiana city? I'm a West Coast girl, and my knowledge of the Midwest is lacking, to say the least. So, if that IS the case, I'm applying to Indiana for Victorian Studies, with an emphasis on imperialism/Postcolonial Theory, gender, and professionalism.

Besides my Lit Theory and Criticism class, which unfortunately has not stuck in my mind that well, my classes in Colonial and Postcolonial literature were the only ones that EVER dipped into theory. Even then, we rarely read more than a page-long excerpt from a given theorist, and it was hard to get a feel for it all. This thread has been great for reading suggestions, but I get the feeling that some of these anthologies will be a hefty little investment.

Well, knowing that two Victorianists got in already makes me feel a little less hopeful about Duke opening its arms to me. All congratulations due, though. It's a wonderful program and you both sound like you deserve it!

Ditto on "Fame" for the first post-acceptance freak-out dance. However, "Damn It Feels Good to Be A Gangsta" will be playing during my slow motion montage where I'm walking through the airport, arriving for visitation weekends, and slow-bounce walking through my new campus.

Why thank you I'm really based more in Victorian literature, but I saw a commercial for "Raisin Brahms" about giving kids enough servings of the arts everyday, and I thought I could use some theory cereal in the morning. Start the day off right, you know?

Music to my ears. UIUC is the first of my schools to show up on the results page, but the empty mailbox dampened the excitement.

(Speaking of my application) "Yes. Okay. Mm-hmm. Sure. Hey Dr. Awesome-Pants, check out this application. It seems pretty solid." "Huh? It's okay I guess. Really, though, what about this other application, Dr. Amazing-Sauce. I think it is far superior" "You are correct, Dr. Awesome-Pants. I wipe my bottom with this inferior example of an application! Ptew Ptew (spitting)" Then I get rejected, and I never hear that someone actually liked my application at any point in the process.

During and since applications I have been working my way through Moby Dick, Madame Bovary, and now Middlemarch. The "M' connection is coincedence.

I received an e-mail on January 8th confirming that my application was complete. (I'm applying for an M.A.)