tinymica

I'm sorry about your rejections! Sushi and a movie sounds super nice. My favorite "don't be sad" movies are Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone and The Grand Budapest Hotel. Anybody else have some good rejection-movie recs?

Have you checked out the extensive spreadsheet discussing financial packages? It considers programs' past financial offers against the COL in the programs' areas. Edit: I believe the spreadsheet is pinned in the LRC main topic.

@brownjournal we're in this together, my friend

No, my last name begins with a C! So I'm very confused

Okay, where's my Brown rejection? I"m ready to join the rejection club

I don't want to clog up the thread with my fretting, so last post on this. Thank you to @MichelleObama @merry night wanderer @jm6394 @caffeinated applicant and @Wimsey for your offers of sympathy and your thoughts. I really appreciate everyone chatting with me about this and I have a lot to think about. While I'm glad to know I'm not alone in the career vs. relationship club, it makes me really sad to see how common a position it is for those of us pursuing academic paths. For me that just reinforces how lonely an environment it can be.

Thank you so much for your insightful reply. My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 2 years. We've been talking for a while about moving in together, but nothing so serious as marriage. I do love him and I'm very attached to him, but I don't feel comfortable calling him my life partner at this point in our relationship. I don't know that, if I had never applied to school and if I were planning to stay here for the next 50 years, we would stay together. It would be very painful to have to end things, but I know I would live. And rationally, I know he's not the only person in the world. I don't think I would never love again. But I don't want anyone else. I don't want to even look at anyone else. This person feels like...he's almost a part of me. He's such a good person, partner, and friend. This is the happiest, most fulfilling relationship I've ever had. I feel like I would be throwing it away if I ended it. I'm crying just thinking about it, but when I read this paragraph over again it seems obvious what I should do. As far as programs, it would be a significant dip. Like, 13 to 35. I feel I have to consider that. Thank you for your thoughts and thank you for sharing your own experience. I'm so, so sorry you're in such a difficult position. It must be frustrating to watch the goings-on in this forum from a heart-wrenching place. I wish you the very best moving forward.

I considered doing the same! I ended up applying to a lot of schools on the east coast because I suddenly felt that I was limiting myself by wanting to stay in California and by applying only to middle-tier schools. I personally don't put much value into prestige and I initially wanted to avoid it, but I was encouraged to think about how much a degree from a prestigious program is worth down the line. Most, if not all, of us want a TT job after graduation and we are all aware of how scarce those opportunities are. That's why I feel I couldn't refuse an offer from a big-name program, though a big name doesn't mean success to me. I would honestly be happy with my one acceptance so far (UW), but I feel like that program doesn't stand up to others I've applied to (UVA, Brown, UPenn).

Thank you for taking the time to reply; I am so appreciative of this community! My boyfriend is willing to move with me, but only if I stay on the west coast (we're from California, specifically the LA area). I don't blame him at all for not wanting to move cross-country. When I asked him to consider it, I did so without expecting or demanding anything. We've made a plan that if I stay in the west, we'll be long-distance until he's 1) saved enough to make the move and 2) found a job in the area. I don't think I'd be able to maintain a long-distance relationship for the entire length of the program. You ask some very good question about happiness and I have to say I don't know the answer right now. I love my boyfriend and I love the work I'll get to do when I start school. I don't know how to measure them at the moment. I have to say, I'm so happy that your partner is able to move with you and support you! Having someone like that in your life is such a blessing! Thank you for your well wishes.

Sorry if this is too personal, I just want to vent quickly... I'm feeling very conflicted. At the moment, I'm in a 1a/1r/1w/4p situation. Honestly, I'm not upset about it. I'm pleased with the offer I did receive and I wasn't very attached to the school that rejected me or the school that waitlisted me. Like everyone else I've been in a state of constant anxiety, swinging between fear and excitement. I can't stop thinking about Brown (my top choice), but I don't know how to process my feelings about it. It would be amazing if I did get an offer from them, which I absolutely don't expect because they're so prestigious and I'm really not up to that caliber, but I almost....don't want to go? And that's crazy, right? Because it's Brown. Part of me gets so excited about the opportunities waiting there. But another part of me is stuck on the massive change to my personal life that that would bring: I would have to end my relationship, which I really don't want to do. And actually, that would be the case if I chose to go to any of the 4 schools I'm waiting for. All those programs would objectively be better than the one I was accepted into; I feel that if I got a really good offer from any of them I wouldn't be able to refuse. So that makes me feel like I almost don't want any more offers. And that's even crazier. Of course, I don't know anything yet and I'm just stuck in this spiral of speculation. Anyway, time to go for a walk and not think about this for a while.

Ahhh that spells rejection for me. I've heard nothing but crickets from them. A waitlist isn't anything to sneeze at! There's still hope!

Oh wow, that's super impressive! It sounds like you were going through a really rough time under all your commitments; I don't blame you for stepping back. And yessss I can't tell you how many times I came into class all happy with my at-home translation and just had my reality shattered lol. But that's part of the fun! I love learning new ways to translate or otherwise say things in English. I don't miss my grammar nut of a professor, though! He always made my class translate linearly, as in word-by-word, which is frustrating since your verb and your subject are often separated by like 4 lines of poetry! I think that the closeness of the classics circle fosters great relationships. Some of my closest friends are the ones I met in the classics department and I've only ever encountered one classics major that I couldn't stand! And because everyone's interests are so varied, I learned a lot from my peers.

Oh yay, I love this classics club! I truly wish I had enough time to declare the major, but I'm grateful for the time I got to spend studying. Though I don't know how I would fit my interest in classics into my current research interests, I definitely can't abandon my love for Latin poetry and I want to take some more Latin in grad school. Your research sounds so interesting and I would love to read it further down the line! That topic needs more attention for sure.

Oh, if my Latin professor had gotten to me even a quarter earlier than she did, I would've been a double-major for sure. My classics department in undergrad was extremely small (3 professors, maybe 9 students?) so I love meeting other classics nerds!

Oh, I love Bones! I can never get into the last couple of seasons, but I rewatch anyway. Also I just noticed that you did your BA in classics as well as English; that’s so cool! I almost did the same, but I would’ve had to stay longer than 4 years so I ended up declaring a minor in classics. It was so much fun!

Thanks for the recommendation! I hate/love reality tv so I’ll check it out. I don’t understand how people dealt with this in the past. They must’ve been stronger than I am lol

I don't work today, so I'm basically spending all day biting my nails and trying not to check my email every 5 seconds. Seeing that some have already received acceptances from UVA and Brown just makes me think I must be rejected, but it isn't over till it's over I suppose. If anyone is looking for a distraction, I just started watching Next in Fashion on Netflix (knowing nothing about fashion) and it's keeping my brain in check for now!

Thank you for sharing your experience! I have spoken to current grad students at most of the programs I applied to, but I will be sure to ask about community when I do visit.

Also, I’ve been thinking lately about possible difficulties in establishing a solid community wherever it is that I go. For most of us, this fall will bring a massive move, some even cross-country. I’ve heard that some programs can be very isolated or antisocial, which to me is a con because much of the work we’ll be doing is stressful and lonely to begin with. Am I wrong to worry about this? Does anyone have experience with this? Personally, I’ve made a big move before and I was lucky to establish a great social circle, but I was an undergrad in an exchange program. This feels fundamentally different.

Thank you so much for posting these updates! I literally woke up this morning thinking “BROWN” and scrabbling to check my email. I fully expect to get rejected, but I just want to know for sure already!

Hey, that’s great! I just finished up my undergrad at UCR last year. People like to be rude about the area and the school (in the context of the whole UC system) but the faculty is wonderful and so is the community. I considered going back there for their grad program just because of that, but ultimately decided to move on. If you do choose them, I think you’ll have a blast!

Thank you so much! I'm very happy and excited to visit campus in March. I'd love to hear more about your experience there and get some tips about Seattle-living! I'll likely be PM'ing you in the near future.

Hi everyone! I came onto this topic months and months ago asking for advice about applications and I just wanted to say thank you so everyone who helped me out! I'm happy to say I've gotten an offer from UW. Rejected from Cornell (this was expected) and waitlisted at UC Davis. Still waiting on some more schools (which sucks) but it's really nice to know this community is here and we're all relatively in the same "waiting" boat

Hello! I'm planning to apply this December to a number of doctoral programs in English literature. I took the GRE last year and, while I didn't completely bomb it, I wasn't happy with my scores. I've already signed up for a re-take and even a prep course, but a friend of mine told me the GRE is just a formality at this point and I should cancel it in order to focus my attention on the more important components of my applications (WS, PS, LOC). To those of you who've been through the applications/admissions ringer, what do you think? Thank you very much for any responses ?

Hello, thank you for your reply! Thanks also for giving me some more places to look into! I've heard great things about the University of Indiana!