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LadyL

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LadyL last won the day on October 11 2010

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  1. Today I had my first experience as a graduate student where knowing more about a topic than a professor in one of my courses led to an academic etiquette quandary. Details obscured to protect egos. Let's call the course "Plant Nutrient Absorption Analysis." My advisor used to teach the course as he is a leading expert in plant analysis, but students felt his version of the course was too hard, so it was given to Professor Bob instead. Today we were covering a type of analysis that was invented by chemists but has been appropriated by many other fields, including plant biologists, geneticists, and physicists. Let's call it Method X. Incidentally, my advisor used to do chemistry work and worked in one of the labs that originally developed Method X, and was in fact an earlier pioneer of the method 25 years ago. Furthermore our lab recently designed a program to help extend the use of Method X into plant imaging data, and this method has become increasing popular in plant imaging in the last 10 years. It clear that the Professor Bob's knowledge of Method X was fairly surface level - he knows what buttons to push in the program to use the method, but not how it works internally. He also presented Method X as if it was only used by biologists interested in nutrient absorption, and mentioned none of the history or the fact that my advisor helped invent the method. Then a classmate asked specifically about Method X for plant imaging. Professor gave a weak, vague answer. I offered a more concrete example, presenting it as a re-frame of what he had said (trying to be respectful and polite). The professor asked more about how we use Method X in plant imaging and I gave a brief explanation. He then replied: "Huh. I'm not familiar with that. I'm not sure how that would actually work. I guess I'd need a more involved explanation." My classmate described his tone as "incredulous" and I think that's the right word for it. He sounded like he didn't believe me that plant imaging uses this method AT ALL. So not only did he not know about my advisor's work (not a big deal on it's own) he didn't even know that the method has been used in plant imaging for over 10 years. This made me a lot more upset that it seemed like it should. I realized that I know more about this method than the professor and he probably finds that unnerving. I decided to treat it as a chance to share my enthusiasm for the method with him and perhaps slip in some education along with it. I approached him after class and mentioned how my advisor was involved with Method X when it was first invented by chemists, and how recent work in our lab includes writing a program to use Method X in plant imaging. He seemed to appreciate my enthusiasm but was still giving me the side eye whenever I mentioned Method X becoming a popular plant imaging analysis method. So after class, I sent him a published article where we used the method coached in "look how cool this is." Here's my question: my advisor has repeatedly expressed interest in how "Plant Nutrient Absorption Analysis" is going. I think he is a little skeptical of the new professor's ability to cover the material. If I tell him about the way Professor Bob covered Method X my advisor will probably go apoplectic because for someone in the same department as you to be totally unaware of probably the biggest achievement of your career is somewhat insulting. But yet I also feel that Prof. Bob, in addition to not knowing the history of the method and my advisor's involvement, did not do a great job of covering the material and that feedback is useful for the department. I know my adviser has some "pull" when it comes to choosing who teaches the course and what it would cover so it is relevant from a departmental perspective. Still with me here? So do I mention this to my advisor, knowing he would *want* to know but that it would also potentially cause departmental conflict? Or do I "protect" Professor Bob from the wrath of my advisor (who is senior to him in the department) and not say anything? My loyalties ultimately lie with my advisor but I'm not sure if this is a "what he doesn't know won't hurt him" exception. Thoughts?
  2. I planned on spending exactly six days waxing rhapsodic about the grand, profound decision I was making and that everyone was hanging on. I figured that would maximize the romance and drama. I was crushed on day four to have my process interrupted with the surprising reminder that it wasn't all about me. I really don't know where you're getting all this from but grad school as soap opera is actually kind of a fun literary style!
  3. First of all, you realize this thread is from last year's admission cycle, correct? Thankfully I am already in graduate school so advice on this matter no longer applies. I see that you are applying this cycle and I remember how stressful the process was. That said I don't think there's any need to imply that I am/was selfish and immature in my actions, or that I didn't put enough thought into it. You're making a bunch of assumptions that reflect more on you than they do on me IMHO. And FWIW I didn't spend "months making a decision" - I got an offer from this program in late March so I had less than a month to think it over, along with 4 other offers. I only put them in the "no" column maybe a few days before I got that email. And I still think they were jerks for changing the deadline at the last minute because it was more convenient for them.
  4. I am in my first year of grad school after working in a lab for 3 years after undergrad. In my last lab, I ran myself into the ground trying to be a superstar. I was pretty successful at it - I helped us avoid getting the funding pulled on a multi million dollar grant whose progress had stalled. In order to do so I collected an unbelievable amount of data under ridiculous time constraints. The PI in the lab actually tried to promote me directly from Research Assistant to Research Associate because of my work but associates have to have a graduate degree and I only had a BA. The problem was that my personal life suffered terribly because I had no energy for anything but my job, and my long term relationship almost ended in part because of that. I also spent the last year in the job burnt out, disengaged, and coasting on my own previous success. I am very, very wary of making the same mistakes again. I would rather have a slightly slower career trajectory and a life, than be a superstar with no friends or boyfriend and a neglected cat who hates me. Right now I get enough work done to please my advisor and maintain progress in my program, but I basically keep my work week to about 35-40 hours. This will inevitably increase next semester when I add a TA position on to my current responsibilities but my plan is to never work more than an average of 45-50 hours a week. It's just not worth the personal cost to me. However, many of my classmates are pulling 60+ hour weeks, coming in to the lab weekends and evenings, etc. It makes me feel guilty that I come in at 10 and pretty much stop working once 5-5:30 rolls around. My advisor lets me set my own pace and deadlines so as long as I am super productive during the week I don't have to stay late or work weekends and holidays unless I want to or think it's necessary. My feeling is that there is *always* more you could be doing, and you have to draw the line somewhere, because trying to do it all is a recipe for burn out. Most of the time I think I am smart for having this approach, and less likely to burn out and end up another ABD, but sometimes I have my doubts and think I'm just a slacker. Anyone else worry about this sort of thing?
  5. Heh, no, but for weeks afterward my boyfriend and I used "inappropriate" at every opportunity - "This grocery list is inappropriate! That shirt is an inappropriate color to go with that sweater! INAPPROPRIATE!!!!1!!1!"
  6. The program in question was a neuroscience program. I don't think the problem has to do with any particular trait of psychologists. I didn't receive this sort of treatment from any of the 14 other programs I applied to, which were a mix of psychology and neuroscience programs. With a little more time in academia, you will probably be as sick of the "Biologists/engineers are all socially inept/aspergers cases" generalization as I am of "psychologists always over analyze everything."
  7. An update to my OP: Short version: The department's reaction to my request had high predictive value for their general attitude. After I was accepted, I was told that they abode by the April 15th deadline common at most schools. Two days before the deadline I got an email from the same administrator who'd called my request inappropriate, basically demanding an immediate answer from me and threatening to revoke my offer completely if I didn't respond in 24 hours. I immediately declined and thanked my lucky stars I had other, better offers. So, in my limited experience, a department that takes this sort of request badly may not be a good environment to spend 5 years in. It may even be a good litmus test for the tone of the department.
  8. PM me if you want info on the lab. I think we are looking to take a student at some point in the future. I am familiar with imposter syndrome but I don't feel like I am actually unintelligent - just that I am out of my element and therefore challenged differently than I expected. Even in the hard classes I took in undergrad I mastered the material with enough practice. But the definition of "enough practice" then versus now is quite different! I can see that it will take months for some of this to absorb and that's an unfamiliar timeline for me. But I'm glad to hear this sounds normal to others.
  9. For the first time in my life I am genuinely overwhelmed by the content of the field I've chosen. I went from a standard neuroimaging lab to a highly interdisciplinary one that incorporates machine learning, computer science, multivariate statistics, and cognitive psychology. My understanding of machine learning is sub-101, computer science is maybe 200 level, multivariate stats maybe 300 level, and cog. psych is the only one where I feel I think at the graduate level. I am really flummoxed at how I am going to get up to speed on all these disciplines enough to integrate them. I am reading two books over winter break that my adviser suggested as background material, and probably 60% of the content just flies over my head. I am definitely learning *something* from the books but I feel like my understanding is woefully over simplified. I can't take classes in any of these areas until my second year as I have to fulfill requirement classes that are only offered next semester, so that isn't an immediate option. Basically, it is mentally painful to be struggling so much just for basic comprehension. At the same time, I like that it is rigorous and that I can't BS my way through anything. I also think that almost any student who would join my lab would have deficient understanding of at least one of our influencing fields, simply because there is no way to master knowledge of all of them unless you quadruple majored in undergrad and did a masters, which I haven't done. My question is: has anyone else started out this confused and eventually had an "a ha!" moment where it clicked and made sense? Is it normal to feel totally in over your head? Other students in my program have said that the work my lab does is confusing to them and they don't feel smart enough to understand it. Part of me enjoys that challenge and part of me feels like a total masochist for doing this.
  10. Yep, worked in a lab in my sub-field (neuroimaging).
  11. I think the content of your response was actually called for in the situation, though the tone was inappropriate. It is frankly insane for them to send you a rejection in September.
  12. Not getting into grad school seems like the end of the world. But it can truly be a blessing in disguise, as I've learned. It took me three rounds to get in but now I am in a program that's a great fit, and am glad about how things worked out. Here are some reasons why not getting in was a good thing for me: 1. I got to work in my field and gain professional experience. I got exposure to how the field actually works - grants, publications, department politics - which is a huge advantage going into a graduate program. 2. I came in with hands on skills. Because it had been my job to analyze data, I already knew the basic methods, and was able to jump right into a project in my new lab. If I had come straight from undergrad it would have set me back 1, maybe 2 semesters in terms of productivity because I would have had to learn from the ground up. 3. Working gave me confidence in myself as a professional in the field. Because my job required self motivation and self management, I know I can successfully work independently. I can set my own goals and be confident in my level of productivity. Some students seem to be constantly questioning whether they're doing too much/not enough, but I know from my experience what the expected pace of my work is in the field and am able to follow that. 4. This is a big one - because I worked instead of doing an MA, I don't have student loans from prior graduate work AND I was able to save money. This means that I am in a much less financially precarious place than my peers. I have enough savings that as long as I live moderately I don't have to worry about having money for food or bills. I won't graduate with any debt. I can't emphasize how huge this is, considering one of the main stresses my classmates complain about is money. 5. Having experience with raises and promotions gave me the confidence to negotiate my financial package. I was able to get a slightly higher stipend than is usually offered, which allowed me to afford a decent apartment in a good area. Unlike students who are living in on campus graduate housing, I don't have the stress of having limits on the number of visitors I can have or RAs giving me a hard time. This also helps with my stress level. 6. My experience also helps me feel more comfortable navigating the relationship with my adviser. I know that I wouldn't have been accepted into the lab if they didn't like me or think I was capable. Other students seem to second guess themselves a lot and get paranoid about their advisers not liking them. Having worked for professors in the field before, I know not to read into things like short emails (they're busy!). I really feel that had I been accepted straight from undergrad I would not have had these numerous advantages. Now, going straight to grad school is certainly do-able, it just means a sharper learning curve and being pretty broke. Plenty of people take that route and are successful, but there are many paths to success, and I am happy with mine.
  13. I need some advice on how to not come off as/feel like a jerk. Basically the majority of the other first years in my program are fresh from MA programs, are living in the area/on their own for the first time, and are heavily in debt from undergrad and their MAs. Our first year stipend is lower than it will be in the later 4 years so there is much moaning and gnashing of teeth over money. The thing is, because I didn't get into grad school until my third round of apps, I had three years working in the field after undergrad, during which I squirreled away a respectable nest egg. Also, I don't have student loan debt, and I live with my boyfriend who makes over twice what I do at his job and chips in a little extra towards bills. And I also negotiated a slightly higher stipend with my adviser because he really wanted me to join his lab. So while I am far from rolling in dough, I am not in nearly as tight a bind as most of my cohort. Everyone is very frank about their financial situation and I did admit to having a slightly higher stipend because the topic of how to get extra funding came up, but I didn't mention the other factors. I also did a LOT of research on the rental market before moving, and was able to score a great deal on an apartment. Whereas a few of my classmates are paying out the a$$ to live in the graduate dorms, which are run like a dungeon (limits on visitors, power hungry RAs, etc.) and are in a fairly sketchy neighborhood. So that is added stress for them financially and logistically that I also don't have to deal with. There are also some discrepancies in life experience that leave me feeling somehow much older than these students, mostly in a "man I am old for my age" sad kind of way. I'm already jaded about aspects of the field they don't even know much about yet, like the grant and journal review process. And I am far less hung up on insecure worry like "does my adviser like me" than they are for whatever reason. In my previous lab my job required me to be extremely self reliant and self managing so I am very comfortable working independently with minimal feedback, which others don't seem to be. I feel like all of this makes it hard for me to relate and join in the typical griping and lamenting that goes on. I presume that if I keep my mouth shut and don't wave around my organic groceries/brag about my spacious apartment/etc. while everyone else is eating ramen/complaining about the nazi RAs/etc., they won't hate me, right? I hope if I focus on common experiences (classes we're in together, what professors are crazy, etc.) it will allow me to get along with everyone without sticking out too much. It's a very social department but I worry about somehow alienating myself because of my different circumstances.
  14. This. $700+ a month for on campus housing is insane. I've lived in three of the most expensive states for rent in the country (MA, RI and now NJ) and only in Boston did I pay that much (for my half towards a 2 bdrm apartment with a roommate). I know people who've lived with roommates in NYC for less than that. Unless there are serious extenuating circumstances I would definitely look into housing alternatives.
  15. I don't know much about Umass' program. If it is reasonably comparable to Suffolk (class size, professor access, etc.) I would choose that to minimize debt. However I did go to Suffolk for undergrad and enjoyed my experience. The small class size and involved advisers were key to my success there. A coworker of mine did an MA in public policy there and was working at the state house at the time; my understanding is that the ties to the state house and local businesses are good. May not be as important to you if you don't plan on staying in the area long.
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