space-cat

If I were you, I'd probably call the Graduate School directly and try to at least get my application fee refunded. I've heard of this happening in similar circumstances, and it certainly seems appropriate here since they failed to actually review your application. It's the principle of the thing, and the GS should have some record of this department failing to do a proper admissions review. If it happened to you, who knows how many other applicants got screwed? As far as the job offer goes, I say take it! You've been so excited about it in your other posts, and it'd be a shame to turn down a great opportunity over something your POI had no part in. Actually, your POI is probably just as ticked off about the situation as you are...

Related to funding, you might also ask if everyone is content with their support and/or receives basically the same funding package, or if there's a lot of competition for a few choice funding opportunities. This can make a HUGE difference in the atmosphere: I've seen a few departments where all the students are fighting over funding, and they are not happy places to be. One graduate of such a program actually told me, "you're always hoping someone leaves, so you can get their funding"

Yes. Absolutely. I also suggest "Getting Accepted Anywhere is an Honor (Even if You Haven't Heard of the School or the Name Won't Impress Your Friends)." I got in to UMN, which happens to have an excellent program for my field. My parents' response was, "That's nice. When do you hear back from Harvard?" I also think I need to make a bourbon restocking trip. I'm down to my last lucky flask full of Maker's Mark...

That really is the best possible response. Your prof wins!

This just happened to a (ridiculously qualified) friend of mine earlier today. I went with "That doesn't make a damn bit of sense" and "I have bourbon in my desk." I honestly don't know what I'd want to hear if/when this happens to me. I'm a talker, so I'd probably just want someone to nod sympathetically while I whine and cry for an hour. And yeah, I hate all that "that just means it wasn't meant to happen" bullshit, too. Uh, thanks. Mind telling me what is meant to happen?

Love. It.

Survey response: PUT MY ADMISSIONS DECISION ONLINE, YOU BASTARDS.

This just makes me imagine someone gasping and throwing a cocktail in the ad com's face. Actually, that might be pretty satisfying...

Personally, I've only heard of this tactic working towards the end of the application cycle, and usually only if you're already in touch with your POI. At that point, it's easier to say something like, "Dream School is my first choice, but unfortunately I must decide whether to accept an offer from Second Place U within the next two weeks" without sounding like a jerk. If you haven't already, it couldn't hurt to respond to your POI and emphasize how enthusiastic you are about this program, and that you would definitely attend if accepted (if that's true, of course!).

I think I may actually try to flat out ignore the results board until the end of February. I've been controlling my nerves pretty well, but my heart skipped a beat this morning when I saw an acceptance posted for my top choice school...and then realized it was for a totally different subfield/degree. I cannot become a crazy person. I have too much shit to do this month. Anyone with me?

black metal

I'm going to give you the same pep talk I gave myself this morning: It will happen when it happens, and not before. If you wake up every morning saying, "this is the day!" or looking for signs of your imminent success or failure, then all you're really doing is setting yourself up for disappointment when you don't meet your own arbitrary deadlines. You cannot spend every day between today and April 15th doing this to yourself. That is crazy, and you will be miserable. Hope for responses, but don't let the presence or absence of a response dictate your day. Acknowledge your anxiety, but don't obsess over it and make it worse. Think positively, but realize that this decision is out of your hands.

Same here. I heard back from one school almost a month ago, but the more time passes, the more it feels like that one was my "freebie," or something. Time to get this show on the road!

Thank you; your consideration of our program application fee is a great compliment to us.

Interesting to read everyone's thoughts on this one. I've actually heard that, in my field at least, ad coms are less enthusiastic about admitting candidates in their early twenties because they tend to be unfocused, take too long to finish their degrees, and don't have a lot of life experience to draw on. We were all encouraged to take a few years off before even thinking about applying. Of course, I'm in anthropology, where "life experience" is considered more relevant to research ability than it might be in, say, computer science or engineering. On the other hand, a friend of mine is applying to med school at 30, and has gotten a whole lot of backlash about her age.

My husband is a pyrotechnician. I fully intend to blow up my rejection letters

Jax and Pink - I've seen that happen from the other side. I worked in the admission office of a highly ranked liberal arts college, and I remember a few situations where a student applied once, was rejected, but kept in touch like you've suggested. The dean(s) they had spoken with ended up fighting pretty hard for their acceptance the second time around, and it was almost always successful. Obviously, college isn't grad school, but the clincher seemed to be that they had credible, "real time" evidence that this candidate could work hard and make a dramatic improvement over a short period of time, which I would think would be just as valuable for grad ad coms. Anybody can bullshit a decent SOP, but they've seen your success and sacrifice firsthand, you know? If nothing else, you've guaranteed that they'll be looking for your application by name and will read it with interest.

Thanks for this, Viking! For all the time we spend imagining what ridiculously high expectations ad coms must have for us and our apps, it's nice to have a reminder that they probably spend just as much time questioning their own worth

My husband likes to say "low expectations are the key to happiness." I'm a second timer. Last year, my application season concluded with a "consolation prize" (i.e. acceptance to the unfunded and crazy expensive MA program instead of the PhD) in mid-April. Cruel, really. At that point, I was so drained that I couldn't even muster the energy to be angry. I think I left work early, downed three glass of scotch (I'm classy that way), and then went to bed for about a week. Good times. This year, I'm trying to be more...mature? sporting? zen?...about the whole process. As soon as I submitted my last application, I started formulating a detailed "plan B," in case history repeated itself. Doing that, instead of compulsively researching the places I might move to for grad school, has really helped me keep things in perspective. When I do receive a rejection (I applied to 8 schools, so I'm gonna get at least one), I intend to keep the ranting to a minimum and just treat it like a really expensive lottery. It sucks to lose, but I know damn well what the odds are and I played anyway. *shrug*

I'm all about the phone call for an admit. Like newms said, if you see that number pop up on your cell (and yes, I do have a cheat sheet with the area codes for the schools I applied to...don't judge me), you know it's going to be good news. Ideally, that phone call is followed by a detailed email, so you don't have to worry about actually retaining any information while you're listening to your future adviser tell you how awesome you are Rejections? Email all the way, and I don't need any more than "Dear Applicant, Sorry. Best of luck elsewhere!" Nothing stings quite like waiting until April, thinking you might still have a shot, when they already rejected you a month ago (but it took two weeks for the letter to be personalized and typed up..then it sat on an admin's desk for another week...then it had to work its way through snail mail...).

So nice to see there are others hanging out with me in this boat! For what it's worth, two of my LOR writers reminded me that it's getting very common for people to need 2-3 tries to get a good offer for a PhD program. I applied last year, at which time I had been out in the "real world" for about a year and a half. 3 rejections and 1 consolation prize, and of course I was crushed for about a week. In retrospect, I was relying too heavily on my academic background to get me in ("but, but, I'm a really good student!"), and didn't use my SOP to talk about what I can and will do in the future, not that I really knew beyond a few general subject areas. I was also really shocked by the sudden surge of applications from people with a lot more work/academic experience, since anthropology is one of those fields where you generally enter a PhD program with just a BA. This year, I actually stumbled in to a great potential research topic while sitting in a work-related seminar. I decided to pitch that in my SOP, drawing on my professional experience, training, and connections as "fieldwork" to back it up. I actually work in a pseudo-academic field that is very closely related to my future area of study. Do not ask me why it took so long for me to connect the two. I think I was just so emotionally attached to my original research interests from undergrad that I completely missed what was right in front of my face. Lesson learned: flexibility is necessary in academia. In any case, I turned in my last app right before Christmas, and got my first offer the first week of January. All told, I spent less than two weeks in "what if they STILL don't like me?" purgatory, even though I'm still waiting on the 7 other schools I applied to. MILES ahead of last year. So, yes, going back a second time made a HUGE difference in the quality of my application. Best of luck to all of you!! Sounds like we're all on much firmer ground this time around, and thank god for that.

Word. It helps to remind myself that blowing stuff off because I'll be a grad student in another state in seven months isn't fair to my coworkers...

Thank you all for cracking me up! On a bad day: "How cute! Someone taught their labradoodle to use our application system!" On a less bad day: "Did she really just name check Kant in her SOP? -5." On a more reasonable day: "Well, she's not the flashiest applicant...but her work is solid, interesting, and easy to fund, she'll get through the program on time, and she won't embarrass us at a national conference. We could use more people like that."

Personal favorite, from during my undergrad: Relative: "So what is it you study again?" Me: "Anthropology. Cultural anthropology." Relative: "Well I know I wouldn't want to spend my life digging up dinosaurs, but if that's what makes you happy..." (dramatic shrug) Me: *facepalm* This is why I'm not that close to most of my family...