Regrets and "if only's"

[pinkypink]

Hey everyone,

I'm a recent graduate (I graduated a week ago) and while it has been exciting starting a new chapter of my life, it has also been extremely nerve-wracking for me with all the uncertainty when it comes to getting into graduate school. 

With that being said, it hit me that with a 2.8 GPA, grad school feels a little out of reach as most programs I've researched won't even accept an application without a 3.0 GPA. 

My biggest struggle has been dwelling on my undergrad years and how school wasn't as big as a priority to me as it should've been. I keep beating myself up because I know my potential as a student (I'm totally capable of getting a high GPA) but focused most of my energy on fun or letting negative events in my life prevent me from focusing on my studies. 

Moving forward, I'm doing my best to be proactive and strengthen my applications to the best of my abilities but mentally, I've been hung up on all the things I could've done with my time during my undergrad years, and also been hung up on thinking how if I did things differently, even slightly, to obtain a 3.0, I could have a chance at many of my dream schools. 

I'm posting this because I'm wondering if anyone has felt this way as a fresh college graduate and what they did to focus on moving forward with their education rather than wondering 'what if' and beating yourself up with regret. I am motivated to do better now, but part of me is still stuck on feeling dumb for not trying harder and ending up in a position where many schools are out of reach, and to know if feeling anxious like this is normal as a new graduate. Thanks guys.

Edited May 22, 2018 by pinkypink

[dr. t]

Feeling anxious is definitely a (new?) normal after your undergraduate.

Depending on your particular life circumstances, post-bac is when many people are first confronted with the realization that their past actions limit their future choices, and that there's nothing they can really do about that. You can mitigate your 2.8, but you can't erase it, and there's a very real possibility that you're not (or at least shouldn't) go to graduate school because of it. 

But that's not failure. Or, it's only a failure if you make it one, and the way you make it a failure is if you limit your future to one objective (e.g. graduate school).

[Elephas]

You may find this forum helpful:

 

[SnowAngel3535]

On 5/22/2018 at 1:00 AM, pinkypink said:

Hey everyone,

I'm a recent graduate (I graduated a week ago) and while it has been exciting starting a new chapter of my life, it has also been extremely nerve-wracking for me with all the uncertainty when it comes to getting into graduate school. 

With that being said, it hit me that with a 2.8 GPA, grad school feels a little out of reach as most programs I've researched won't even accept an application without a 3.0 GPA. 

My biggest struggle has been dwelling on my undergrad years and how school wasn't as big as a priority to me as it should've been. I keep beating myself up because I know my potential as a student (I'm totally capable of getting a high GPA) but focused most of my energy on fun or letting negative events in my life prevent me from focusing on my studies. 

Moving forward, I'm doing my best to be proactive and strengthen my applications to the best of my abilities but mentally, I've been hung up on all the things I could've done with my time during my undergrad years, and also been hung up on thinking how if I did things differently, even slightly, to obtain a 3.0, I could have a chance at many of my dream schools. 

I'm posting this because I'm wondering if anyone has felt this way as a fresh college graduate and what they did to focus on moving forward with their education rather than wondering 'what if' and beating yourself up with regret. I am motivated to do better now, but part of me is still stuck on feeling dumb for not trying harder and ending up in a position where many schools are out of reach, and to know if feeling anxious like this is normal as a new graduate. Thanks guys.

I know this may not help you but I have opposite regrets. I did good in school but I focused all of my energy on that and didn't focus on the fun part of college and now that is my biggest regret of my college life. Balance is key. When I start grad school in the fall I will make it my priority to keep on top of my coursework and research but also to make time for fun stuff and socializing with my peers.

[samman1994]

On 5/23/2018 at 1:53 PM, Elephas said:

You may find this forum helpful:

 

I basically second this. I had similar concerns since my GPA was a 3.0 and my GRE scores were basically average, and yet I was looking at above average programs for a PhD in a field that was outside my undergrad major. Lot of similar stories on that thread. 

At the end of the day, it comes down to you. Forget your GPA and all your scores, those don't matter in applying. It doesn't matter if you qualify and to where. What matters mroe is why you're applying.