0% Confidence of Acceptance

[ekant]

Ekant, I completely feel you. I have been shying away from gradcafe for about 2 weeks due to not being able to handle watching the acceptances go out. Gradcafe is such a wonderful place when you're completing your apps, but when it comes down to the waiting for response portion, it is a killer. Keep the faith as strong as you can, I continually pray to the universe that I will have my moment this year. It has been hard as hell for me. My best friend who was rejected across the board last year got accepted by the first school that reported to him, which I was rejected from, and now I don't have anyone in my corner. While I am happy for him, it depressed me even more than seeing the rejection itself. Do what you have to do to keep your sanity.

I completely feel you as well. That's great for your friend, but that would kill me too. This waiting game is the most miserable experience ever. Trying to keep my sanity over here. Be well and I hope you hear back with some positive news!

I woke up at 5am crying this morning, couldn't go back to sleep. I have an campus visit/interview on Thursday, so that's good, but I am 99 percent certain that it's for a wait list position only, and the cherry on top is I'll be spending the day with people who've already received their acceptance letters for the program. So it will be day of me smiling and saying "Yeah, it's a great program! You should go!" while on the inside I'll be saying "don't go! don't go!"

Now I'm blasting Bob Dylan's "Highway 61 Revisited" album. It's helping. Next step: work on M.A. Comprehensive Exam studying, interview prep (dammit, I'm not going down without a fight!) lesson planning, and resume polishing (ah, Plan until I'm exhausted. Here's hoping burying myself in work is the ticket today. Because the alternative is culring up in bed with TV and depression, and dammit, I refuse to do that. It's not over till it's over, and if I get rejected from everywhere, I know what to do next year. I'll apply to more schools, I'll have a better SoP, and I'll make contact with profs in the programs I'm applying to early in the season. In addition, if I'm not in grad school next year, I'll be a classroom teacher... and honestly, there are worse fates.

Bah that interview situation sounds so grim. However, it's definitely likely that not everyone they accept will take the offer, so you still have a good chance, I think. I know what you mean about wishing them ill fate while acting as if you're excited about their acceptance! Its definitely not over until it's over. I don't have an MA yet, I have two BA's (well, I will in two months... Ive finished both my degrees, I'm just in my last semester trying to complete 6 elective credits). I will feel like rubbish if I don't get accepted anywhere, though... I've worked so hard for four years (in a variety of ways) and it'd be truly a dagger to my confidence if I need to start a collection of rejection letters.

[ComeBackZinc]

You do have people in your corner, lolopixie. It's crazy to me how hard I pull for strangers I've never met before, but I do.

[marlowe]

I know it sucks guys, but hang in there.

Plenty of us have been through one (or more) rounds of across the board rejections. As the philosopher Argent once wrote, 'hold your head up'.

[lolopixie]

I'm glad I got a raise at work...and a nice bonus on this last check because I have been doing some serious retail therapy. I haven't been this way in a really long time, but my fab new guess purse and flats are making me so happy right now. Even though I got them on the cheap at Burlington Coat Factory

[TripWillis]

You do have people in your corner, lolopixie. It's crazy to me how hard I pull for strangers I've never met before, but I do.

This.

[ekant]

This.

Agreed.

[bdon19]

Agreed.

Ditto, again. I was so sure nothing would work out for me, and I'm so thankful that it has, but that doesn't keep me from hoping the intelligent, friendly, encouraging people who got me through the process get good news as well. I really feel so happy when I see people on here receive acceptances. It makes it all worth it.

[marlowe]

Bdon, I didn't realize you had been accepted to Carolina. Any idea to which school you are leaning?

Also, did you hear from Michigan, or is that one of those implicit rejections?

[TripWillis]

Ditto, again. I was so sure nothing would work out for me, and I'm so thankful that it has, but that doesn't keep me from hoping the intelligent, friendly, encouraging people who got me through the process get good news as well. I really feel so happy when I see people on here receive acceptances. It makes it all worth it.

I almost applied to UNC -- would've been another case of great fit, but alas, I had too many top-tiers. CONGRATS!! It's such an awesome school. You have freaking amazing choices now.

[lolopixie]

Thanks for the encouragement. I know I still have 4 schools to report. I'm feeling really good about Miami. Keep the good vibes coming!

[marlowe]

I almost applied to UNC -- would've been another case of great fit, but alas, I had too many top-tiers. CONGRATS!! It's such an awesome school. You have freaking amazing choices now.

Trip, just noticed that 2/3 of my undergraduate honors committee earned their PhDs at SUNY Buffalo. And the third member of the committee earned hers from the Grad Center at CUNY. YOU COULD BE THEM.

[bdon19]

Bdon, I didn't realize you had been accepted to Carolina. Any idea to which school you are leaning?

Also, did you hear from Michigan, or is that one of those implicit rejections?

I haven't yet allowed myself to really pick favorites. I need to do a lot more research and allow the most recent acceptances to sink in before it will really be fair to make a real assessment. I think I'll be able to make all the visit weekends, which should really help. And funding information is still pending from IU. But, at this point, UNC is looking really nice. That being said, UT was one of my top choices from the start. And IU's program is fabulous, too. Getting in doesn't make it any easier, it just gives you different problems to deal with.

And I still haven't heard a word from Michigan, but I'm assuming I'm out. It's been enough time that I've given up.

[spasticlitotes]

Ditto, again. I was so sure nothing would work out for me, and I'm so thankful that it has, but that doesn't keep me from hoping the intelligent, friendly, encouraging people who got me through the process get good news as well. I really feel so happy when I see people on here receive acceptances. It makes it all worth it.

YAY you guys!!!

[TripWillis]

Trip, just noticed that 2/3 of my undergraduate honors committee earned their PhDs at SUNY Buffalo. And the third member of the committee earned hers from the Grad Center at CUNY. YOU COULD BE THEM.

It's looking like the Grad Center at this point and I can't tell you how thrilling that would be. It's a dream program for my interests.

[ekant]

I've only heard great things about the Grad Center. Serious congrats.

[lolopixie]

Yea, grad center is fab. Good for you, Trip!

[Stately Plump]

I love that the "0% Confidence of Acceptence" thread has turned into "let's support each other through this cripplingly difficult time/let's celebrate each other's victories" thread. (Note: not meant as "tough to decipher internet sarcasm"; meant in earnest.)

It's so encouraging to see so many supportive people on here. It makes me really excited to get to know you guys professionally, as we develop into the next community of scholars and intellectuals. So, I guess my point is, yay us

<3 to all

[TripWillis]

I've only heard great things about the Grad Center. Serious congrats.

Yea, grad center is fab. Good for you, Trip!

Thanks guys!!

[wintergirl]

I'm nearly ready to break down in tears, just as many of you have agreed in earlier posts. I keep seeing these threads of schools I applied to and how they've all sent out their first acceptances and wait lists and interview weekends, and I just can't handle it anymore. I need to get off this fucking computer and stop reading about other people's decisions. Congrats to everyone who has gotten in to at least one school! For all those who haven't gotten in anywhere yet: I feel you, I love you even though I don't even know you, and let's stay strong...somehow.

Yep. You nailed exactly how I'm feeling too. Happy for others but feeling like it's a form of sick masochism to even look at these boards without a single acceptance yet. And sending love and strong vibes out to you too! <3

Ekant, I completely feel you. I have been shying away from gradcafe for about 2 weeks due to not being able to handle watching the acceptances go out. Gradcafe is such a wonderful place when you're completing your apps, but when it comes down to the waiting for response portion, it is a killer. Keep the faith as strong as you can, I continually pray to the universe that I will have my moment this year. It has been hard as hell for me. My best friend who was rejected across the board last year got accepted by the first school that reported to him, which I was rejected from, and now I don't have anyone in my corner. While I am happy for him, it depressed me even more than seeing the rejection itself. Do what you have to do to keep your sanity.

Yep. <3 I've been thinking the same thing about when to use these boards ~next time~ (if there is/has to be a next time). Been staying away from GC also since it's been hard to even get out of bed this week. At least my best friend isn't applying this year so she's totally in my corner, but there are others in my MA program who are getting acceptances (not to my schools) and it sucks donkey balls to not want to even show my face around my department lest someone ask me "any news?" and I burst into tears. Hang in there, lolo! Keeping the faith for you. : )

I woke up at 5am crying this morning, couldn't go back to sleep.

Here's hoping burying myself in work is the ticket today. Because the alternative is culring up in bed with TV and depression, and dammit, I refuse to do that. It's not over till it's over, and if I get rejected from everywhere, I know what to do next year. I'll apply to more schools, I'll have a better SoP, and I'll make contact with profs in the programs I'm applying to early in the season.

Yep! Hats off to your positivism. (I've fallen into the tv/depression trap myself...) I'm also already starting to think about how to do things differently next year. Can't believe I'm even considering applying again, to be honest. This process has gutted me.

Keeping the faith for you guys and any other lurkers out there who are also feeling like crap right now. Things WILL work out eventually. Stay strong! Keep yourself happy with the little things--new purse/shoes, music, Plan B planning, lots of tv and Ben & Jerry's... whatever it takes. We'll get through it. <3

[cquin]

lolo and bespeckled, I'm rooting for you too!

[wintergirl]

Thanks, cquin. : ) And hey! Brandeis--that's new and AWESOME. Congrats!!!

[veniente]

it sucks donkey balls to not want to even show my face around my department lest someone ask me "any news?" and I burst into tears.

This.

Pulling for you bespeckled. I'm sure that your acceptance will be coming any time soon!

[TripWillis]

Okay, so you know how we were talking about how our family and friends always say something like, "Oh, well I'm SURE you'll get in. You love to read and you're a great student! I don't know why you're so worried!"? You know, because they have no idea about the whole 300 apps for 10 funded spots deal, split up further by subfocus?

I wanted to let everyone know that once you do actually get in, none of them appreciate what a feat it is. "Oh, well we're not surprised! Congratulations! Is that a good school?" ARGH. It doesn't matter if it's a good school! I got in! Stop it, Dad! Just because the only good school you've ever heard of is Oxford doesn't give you the right to downplay my accomplishments! I HATE YOU. I'M GOING TO MY ROOM TO LISTEN TO LINKIN PARK AND I'M NEVER SPEAKING TO YOU AGAIN. THEN I AM GOING TO ORANGE JULIUS AND HOT TOPIC TO HANG OUT WITH MY FRIENDZ!!

whoa what happened? Sudden flashback.

[Stately Plump]

Okay, so you know how we were talking about how our family and friends always say something like, "Oh, well I'm SURE you'll get in. You love to read and you're a great student! I don't know why you're so worried!"? You know, because they have no idea about the whole 300 apps for 10 funded spots deal, split up further by subfocus?

I wanted to let everyone know that once you do actually get in, none of them appreciate what a feat it is. "Oh, well we're not surprised! Congratulations! Is that a good school?" ARGH. It doesn't matter if it's a good school! I got in! Stop it, Dad! Just because the only good school you've ever heard of is Oxford doesn't give you the right to downplay my accomplishments! I HATE YOU. I'M GOING TO MY ROOM TO LISTEN TO LINKIN PARK AND I'M NEVER SPEAKING TO YOU AGAIN. THEN I AM GOING TO ORANGE JULIUS AND HOT TOPIC TO HANG OUT WITH MY FRIENDZ!!

whoa what happened? Sudden flashback.

I love the, "Oh, wow, that's a good school!" comment. What they don't realize is that every single school we're applying to has an acceptance rate of--at the MOST--10%. TEN PERCENT! LITERALLY, BROWN, HARVARD, PRINCETON, YALE, AND COLUMBIA WERE THE ONLY UNDERGRAD SCHOOLS WITH A SIMILAR ACCEPTANCE RATE!!!

My point is, to be accepted into a PhD program is similar (actually, often more competive) than being accepted into Harvard, Princeton, Yale, etc. So tell your parents, "I got accepted into _____ PhD program, which is more competitive than Harvard." That should help them understand

[jma310]

GAH I know. Or worse, when you tell someone you didn't get into "X" university, which is normally thought of as a middling sort of school, but just happens to have a top graduate department in English, they think you're a moron.