Doing favours for your advisor

[Dal PhDer]

Ok...so the topic of this thread is much more interesting and sultry sounding than it actually is.

I have recently been asked by my supervisor to house-sit for him for two weeks. He asked me today to begin house sitting for him on Thursday. He has asked me before and I have managed to have another commitment then...but I remembered what it entails. He expects me to move in, take care of his two cats, water the plants and he'll give me $50/week for groceries.

Now...I don't mind house sitting, but I have my own cat and my own place (closer to campus than his), I don't have a car- so getting anywhere requires busing...and I don't really want to have the responsibility of something going wrong in his house! With my luck there will be a flash flood that sweeps away half his house.

Have other students been asked to do these kinds of favours (e.g., babysitting, house sitting) by their advisors? Did you feel that you had to say yes to them? Have you said no? Can I just say, "nah...no thanks" or should I have a decent reason why I don't want too? Could I pretend that he sent the email to the wrong email address and I never got it? haha

PS: If you would rather talk about other 'favours' your advisor has asked for, you can....

[ktel]

What an awkward situation. I will firstly say I think he is severely underpaying you. I don't know if its comparable for cats, but it's easily $40/day to put my dog in a kennel somewhere. I used to house sit for a friend of mine and watch their dog (who was rather high maintenance), and they would pay me at least $100/week and their house was very conveniently located. I probably would have done it for much less. Given the fact that this is not convenient for you exacerbates the low pay problem.

Can you just use your cat as an excuse? Claim it's feral or something and can't be with other cats or left alone all night. I always need a pretty good excuse if I'm going to say no to someone, especially someone like your supervisor.

[Vader Was Framed]

Is there a per diem for alcohol?

[Eigen]

My understanding is that there's a good chance your advisor is seeing this as a win-win situation. He gets someone he trusts to look after his house, cats and plants, and you get some extra cash.

If it's inconvenient for you to do so, I'd just be up front about it. And having your own pets and no car is certainly a decent reason, imo. They may have never run across this before, however- everyone I know that's been asked has jumped at the chance to get a bit of extra cash.

That said, I have done favors for my advisor, and have asked him to do some for me as well. How you respond completely depends on the relationship you have with them.

[TakeruK]

When my wife and I moved into town, our car broke down (but we arrived a few days before our lease began). My advisor helped us by doing some driving around for us on the first day (we did the moving, but he drove us to our broken down car and let us load it up with our boxes, and drove us to our new place. He hasn't asked for any real favours but I probably would do them if it wasn't a big inconvenience -- grad students do favours for each other all the time, so if it's something I would do for a friend, I would likely do for him too. I did invite my advisor (and former advisors) to my wedding -- the ones that were in town did attend! I know other people who have helped their advisor paint e.g. the garage.

I probably wouldn't house-sit for my advisor though. Personally, I would feel it would be too much responsibility to watch over a house for 2 whole weeks! Also, in your case, your own cat would have to be not only displaced, but also share with 2 other cats!! When I had to be away with a cat, I just asked a friend to come by and check in every other day or so. Just checking in once a day is one thing but completely moving in for two weeks is another!

I think you have good enough reasons (no car, your own cat, further commute) that you can politely turn down the offer without offending any reasonable person. You could offer to drop by once a day to check on his cats, instead, if that's not too inconvenient.

[Dal PhDer]

I guess I jumped the gun a bit and never thought that he might be thinking it's a win/win situation!

I went with ktel's suggestion about not wanting to leave my cat alone for that long- hey if he doesn't want to leave his alone, why should I leave my cute little terror alone?! I did offer to go out every other day to check in on them and the house...I think that's a nice offer, and makes me feel not so guilty about saying no.

I had contemplated answering: "Is it ok if my boyfriend stays too? He just got out of jail and we haven't seen eachother for 4 months and he really needs a place to stay" ...I figured that would get a no right away! haha

I think it might just be a bit of my wilty personality that I hate saying no without a really good reason, especially to my boss.

[ktel]

I liked reading all the responses to this. My perspective is very different, I think, because I really have no personal relationship with my supervisor. I see him very infrequently for very short meetings. I'm only doing a Master's, so I'm here for a short time, but I did decide to do a PhD this forum has certainly opened my eyes to what a student-advisor relationship could be. Although I think I could've had that if I had gone with another prof.

[fuzzylogician]

I've house-sat for our DGS once - she's not my direct advisor but still someone with power over me. I didn't get paid but I got to stay in her REALLY nice house for a couple of weeks and I liked the arrangement. It didn't involve much more than turning lights on and off, picking up the mail, watering the plants and taking out the garbage. I had to turn her down the next time because it didn't fit my schedule - no hard feelings on either side. I guess it really depends on your relationship with your advisor. I wouldn't feel bad about saying no to my advisor if it didn't work out, I assume that they would only ask me because they think I'm a trustworthy person so they would believe me if I just said that I can't this time (and any of these reasons would be accepted with no questions asked, I believe - don't feel comfortable, going out of town, have people visiting, have my own cat, etc).

[rising_star]

If you add it all up, I've house or pet-sat for 3/4 members of my committee. One was a long-term housesitting gig wheere I actually paid money to help cover the mortgage and bills. Another was a few days of dogsitting. And a third was 2 weeks of dogsitting. The first one is the only one where I didn't get paid.

[Dal PhDer]

I liked reading all the responses to this. My perspective is very different, I think, because I really have no personal relationship with my supervisor. I see him very infrequently for very short meetings. I'm only doing a Master's, so I'm here for a short time, but I did decide to do a PhD this forum has certainly opened my eyes to what a student-advisor relationship could be. Although I think I could've had that if I had gone with another prof.

Mmm...I think I am kind of in your boat. I think my relationship with my advisor is mostly what makes me feel uncomfortable about this. in the 4 years I have known him (through my MA and PhD) I've been to his house once for a lab function. I just wouldn't feel comfortable in that home, and being there for a long period.

I think it's really nice to see the wide range of student/advisor relationships on here! I really allows one to get a great perspective.

Edit: I always run out of thank you points before I even begin the day!

Edited August 14, 2012 by Dal PhDer

[lewin]

I looked after my advisor's cat for five months while he was on sabbatical. He emailed our whole lab and I volunteered. Pay hadn't been discussed up front, but he ended up giving me a gift card for a significant amount as a thank you.

This is just a shot in the dark, but in other threads you've mentioned behaviours by your advisor that led me to believe he might be a bit (unintentionally?) sexist. There's research that young female professors do a disproportionate amount of service and committee work because of stereotypes that women are supposed to be more communal and interdependent. It might be worth some thinking about whether other (male) students in your lab are also asked for personal favours. I can't see how house sitting would take away from your research time--so it might not be that big a deal--but just raising the possibility.