Building a Relationship with Professors

[vonSeckendorff]

Hey all, I'm a junior at a large state school; I transferred from a community college, and this is my second quarter at my current school. I never really went to office hours back at CC, and my first quarter here, it was the same way. You see, I'm a pretty shy person; plus I always found it more efficient to just use that time to study on my own. Now that I realize I need three LoRs for my grad school applications, I'm beginning to panic. Ideally, I would like to apply this fall, but I'm worried that it's a little late to start building relationships with my professors (at least the ones I think would make good LoR writers.)

 

This quarter is almost half over (week four of a ten-week course), and I didn't really go to office hours much. I'm going to change that, but how should I establish a relationship with my professor in a way that will get me solid LoRs? I know it sounds disingenuous--I guess, yeah, I have ulterior motives--but hey, requirements are requirements, and I need those letters. :\ Also, six weeks might not be a whole lot of time, so should I try to continue the relationship after the quarter is over to maybe increase my chances of getting a good letter? If so, how should I go about doing that? (This professor in particular is in the field that I want to go into; plus the class he's teaching is on related material, so I think he would make an great LoR.)

 

So basically, in a limited amount of time, how do I schmooze my way to solid LoRs with professors I'm not doing research with? And even if time weren't as much of a constraint (I suppose I could always apply fall after graduation), how do I schmooze anyways? I'm not the most social of people; so my schmoozing needs help regardless.

 

Thanks for any suggestions or comments! I'm quite the n00b, so thanks for bearing with me.

 

 

[Ciarrai300]

Do you have the same professor for multiple classes? Are you strong academically?  Going to office hours can be helpful but you're better off being noticed in class for your thoughtful input and your strong academics.  Granted if your prof. has no idea who you are that's a problem.  Going to office hours just to chat isn't going to make a great impression so be sure when you go you've brought something you want to discuss.  If the professor is in your field maybe go see them saying you'd like their advice about grad school.  Ask them whether they feel you're a strong candidate and what you should be doing to be a stronger one.  Then take action on their advice. If they see you're serious about your field and willing to work hard I'm sure they'd be happy to write you a recommendation.

[Human_]

Well you still have this semester + your senior year left, so there's still time. Actually, I have 3 strong recommendations that all came from relationships I built my senior year, so it's definitely doable. Is there any type of optional thesis for your major? If a thesis requires you to get an advisor and possibly a second reader, then there are two people right there that will be able to write good LoR's for you. Plus, completing a substantial research project will definitely help your chances anyway. The next best option is to try to get involved with research that fits your interest. Other than that, you could start going to office hours for classes that are relevant to your desired field of study, and have conversations about whatever interests you. Just be sure you do well in class and show enthusiasm for the material.

[vonSeckendorff]

Thanks for the replies you guys!

 

Do you have the same professor for multiple classes? Are you strong academically?  Going to office hours can be helpful but you're better off being noticed in class for your thoughtful input and your strong academics.  Granted if your prof. has no idea who you are that's a problem.  Going to office hours just to chat isn't going to make a great impression so be sure when you go you've brought something you want to discuss.  If the professor is in your field maybe go see them saying you'd like their advice about grad school.  Ask them whether they feel you're a strong candidate and what you should be doing to be a stronger one.  Then take action on their advice. If they see you're serious about your field and willing to work hard I'm sure they'd be happy to write you a recommendation.

I think I'm pretty strong academically, I'm just not much of a talker. But I guess I'll just have to work on that if I want those letters, huh?

 

Well you still have this semester + your senior year left, so there's still time. Actually, I have 3 strong recommendations that all came from relationships I built my senior year, so it's definitely doable. Is there any type of optional thesis for your major? If a thesis requires you to get an advisor and possibly a second reader, then there are two people right there that will be able to write good LoR's for you. Plus, completing a substantial research project will definitely help your chances anyway. The next best option is to try to get involved with research that fits your interest. Other than that, you could start going to office hours for classes that are relevant to your desired field of study, and have conversations about whatever interests you. Just be sure you do well in class and show enthusiasm for the material.

I didn't know undergraduate theses had the option of having a second reader, haha! If my school allows it, that would be perfect! Thanks for the suggestion and for the words of encouragement! By the way, I'm assuming that you applied to grad school after your senior year then?

[Sarah Bee]

I had gotten two LoRs from my professors but then someone suggested that I should get one letter from my departmental head too. He taught me for one semester in 2008 and since there were around 85 students in my class, he couldn't recall me individually. And, like you, I too found it hard to initiate a conversation with him (particularly because I was about to ask for a personal favour and though profs are habitual to writing letters, it was an awkward moment for me). Nonetheless, I went to him twice to ask for an LoR but the professor was very busy and didn't pay heed.

So one day, I wrote a draft myself and used pointers and humbly asked him to write me an LoR along those lines and to my surprise actually wrote me a great one. 

I wouldn't recommend you or anyone doing the same but point is that you have to muster up the courage to talk to professors and establish a good rapport with them because in this particular context, end justifies the means.

[bsharpe269]

I doubt that when you read research articles in your field you understand 100% of what is discuessed?

 

Generally when I go to speak to my professors, i dont do it for class questions. I can usually find that information from the book. I generally go because I read an interesting article and want the opinion of a professor or I have trouble understanding one so I go for clarification. I also doubt you understand all of the research that your professors are publishing. There should at least be a few professors at the school whose research interests you and you have been following (if not atively helping with). Do you not ever have questions about their personal publications?

 

I am generally a shy person too but without help from professors, I dont think I would understand all of the major articles that are being published in my field nearly as well as I do with their help.

[Human_]

By the way, I'm assuming that you applied to grad school after your senior year then?

 

Yes. I didn't even realize that I wanted to go to grad school until late in my senior year.

[Dedi]

My advice to you is to not think about the motive of getting recommendation letters. In my opinion, it can make professor-student relations seem a bit forced and not genuine. I am a shy student myself, and sometimes I can feel my heart pounding in anxiety before I go to a professor's office (or it could be the three flights of steps...), but once I go there and start chatting the anxiety goes away. I regularly send my professors articles of interest to discuss, especially if they're new and relevant to the topic we are on. I also go to office hours to discuss certain matters (whether they are academic or not). You need to be comfortable with your professors and let the relationship go where it wants to go. Don't feel rushed; you have almost a year to establish something with a few of your professors.

As long as you do well in class, I don't see why the professor would be reluctant to talk with you. However, I come from a private liberal arts college, so my view might be different from what the large university subculture is like.

Edited February 23, 2014 by Dedi

[seeingeyeduck]

I think professors appreciate it when you have genuine questions about the material. As long as you build the relationship on that basis instead of just trying to be friendly for the sake of being friendly, it will be perfectly professional.

Your motives are fine - they're there to support you and they know that they will be asked to write letters for some students. Making an effort is still appreciated - they certainly find it more meaningful to write letters for a student that comes to office hours than one that shows up once just to ask for a letter. I don't think it takes long to establish a good working relationship as long as you can converse about the research or course material.

[victorydance]

First of all, why don't you wait another year before going to grad school? For one, depending on what programs you are applying to, grad school is a large commitment. It's good that you are interested in pursuing further education and are preparing for that, but there really isn't any rush either.

 

I entered my senior year with a total of zero potential LORs. In fact, two of them were secured largely on the back of my final semester (although I knew them before hand, I didn't work one on one with them until that last semester). So relationships can be cultivated quickly, but I feel you need to follow the following steps for success:

 

1) You need to target three profs. This is a mixture of asking around who is friendly, personable, and willing to cater to undergrads. More importantly however, you need to find three profs where you have some kind of research interest in common, and get in their classes.

 

2) You need to go to office hours almost every week. And when I say go into their office hours, this means go in prepared. 

 

2a) The first office hours should be introducing yourself, and asking questions about the required essays. Say that you want to get started early and ask what they are looking for. This is an easy way of showing them quickly that you are a committed and dedicated student. (Pretty much every prof loves to see dedicated students and these types of students always get preferential treatment).

 

2b) The next step is to start going into their office hours every week asking about the readings...something you didn't understand, something you liked, what other papers do they know that are on similar subjects/use similar methods? You can also supplement these visits by asking what research they do, what they are currently working on ect. This pegs into their mind that they you are interested. 

 

2c) DO WELL ON EVERY ASSIGNMENT AND PARTICIPATE IN CLASS. You should be getting As in all the classes your potential letter writers are teaching (if they are the ones marking the papers even better). You should be asking intelligent questions in class. You don't need to 'that guy' that is always talking, but you need to be active.

 

2d) After you continue to do these things, the most important part is now: try to get into some kind of situation where you are working one on one with all three of them. There are plenty of avenues to take. If you have done the above really well, ask them if you can do research for them as an RA over the summer or whenever. Many schools have courses where you can do an independent research and reading class (basically a class where you go one on one and he assigns readings, you talk about them with each other, and you write a paper). Obviously the easiest one is a honours thesis, this is an automatic letter. These things are not expected however, you need to ask them...and if you have done the things above well, then they will probably accept.

 

2e) Work your ass off whenever you are given the opportunity to work one on one with a prof in some capacity.

 

Follow these steps and by the end of your senior year you will have great letters. You don't have to be brilliant, nor the most social person in the world (I sure as hell am not), you just need to be: dedicated, interested, and willing to ask about opportunities.

 

Lastly, you don't need to be an ass kisser. Stroking their egos once in a while is fine, saying hi when you see them on campus, being kind and polite, ect. is plenty enough.

[Guest Gnome Chomsky]

I'll give a few thoughts: 

 

1. If you are shy, a good way to sort of "force" a professor to notice you is to try to get some kind of job in a lab. If you demonstrate a strong work ethic and do good research, it won't matter if you don't talk much. Lots of people on here recommend 2 of your 3 letters coming from professors you worked with in lab, not who you took a class with. The typical, "Jean Doe took my XXX class in Spring 2014. She was a very engaged student. She received an A and wrote a good paper on YYY," isn't really a strong letter of rec. 

 

2. Office hours can be tricky. It can be a good or bad idea. Going to office hours because you need additional help and have a lot of questions doesn't really demonstrate that you're a strong student. Also, going to office hours just to talk about random things can become a little awkward. The best thing to do would probably be to get very high grades in class so that the professor takes notice of you, and then go to his/her office from time to time to discuss things related to the class. This shows a desire to go above and beyond. 

 

3. It can be hard to get noticed if you're just an average or slightly above average student. It really depends on the layout of the class. I got all 3 of my letters from professors who I took classes with. Fortunately for me, I'm a very talkative person and hard to go unnoticed. I also always got the highest grades on tests. I have kind of a "love him or hate him" personality. Very arrogant and I say innappropriate things. This rubbed some professors the wrong way and intrigued others. The professors I did get letters from really seemed to like it. I became drinking buddies with all 3 of my letter writers. I guess what I'm trying to say is, if you're not a vocal person, your test/homework scores need to be pretty damn good for them to take notice of you. 

[toriec]

This option might not work for everyone, but here's what I'm doing. I have on very solid reference from a prof I do research with, but I wasn't sure who to choose for the other one. I thought about all my professors and decided on one who is very well-respected in her field and whose classes I've done well in. I went to her office hours and talked to her about grad school. I asked her for advice on how to choose referees and she actually offered to be mine! Of course, that's what I was hoping for, but I didn't want to be so obvious. She said that one of her referees back in the day was a professor whose class she did really well in but who she didn't really know much better than that, and that she'd say whatever I wanted her to in the reference letter. She also said she's done this with other students who have very strong academics but who aren't the loudest in class.