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What happens to the people who don't get in?


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As I search the forum I come across all sorts of old conversations. Forum archeology. I see stuff from damn near antiquity... or the 2010 season.

Whatever happens to those folks who stuck around for a year and got denied from everywhere?
Why did they stop at 55 posts? 
They were so highly praised.  Where did they go wrong?
Are they okay?

Occasionally I stumble on an old thread and up-vote the folks. We may have never simultaneously shared G.C. but I feel they are my brothers and sisters in arms.

I love you, past rejects; I hope you've found your future. 

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This is hauntingly beautiful and kind of poetic. Kudos, Bowties.

Thank you. I started coming here without an account maybe a year and a half ago. and I find myself missing certain faces this year. Faces that I know didn't get in.

Sometimes I'll look up past topics and follow them till the end - they're little stories. Some have happy endings, a few have sad endings.

It's a wonderful surprise when you follow someone who was denied one year and comes back the next and gets into their dream program. 

Is it possible that we'll all live happily ever after?

This probably reads like a teen girl diary. :-P

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Nah, it just reads as humanist. Very cool, actually.

 

I do enjoy that some people from past application seasons have stuck around and put in their .02 every once in a while; it's nice that people still care even after their own personal stake in the matter is withdrawn. I would like to hear the stories of those who were rejected as well... What did you move on to? Did you apply again? Did you find a job? Are you happy?

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Nah, it just reads as humanist. Very cool, actually.

 

I do enjoy that some people from past application seasons have stuck around and put in their .02 every once in a while; it's nice that people still care even after their own personal stake in the matter is withdrawn. I would like to hear the stories of those who were rejected as well... What did you move on to? Did you apply again? Did you find a job? Are you happy?

I wonder if it hurts... looking back and watching us fresh-faced folks all giddy on our apps.  Will multiple app years callous the regular student?

I also appreciate the folks who stuck around. They make it a much more virbrant and helpful discourse community.

 

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I struck out last year and had great success this year! So my story (at least the admissions part) ends happily. Like you, I always wonder what happened to some users, or even which school they ended up choosing!

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Thank you. I started coming here without an account maybe a year and a half ago. and I find myself missing certain faces this year. Faces that I know didn't get in.

Sometimes I'll look up past topics and follow them till the end - they're little stories. Some have happy endings, a few have sad endings.

It's a wonderful surprise when you follow someone who was denied one year and comes back the next and gets into their dream program.

Is it possible that we'll all live happily ever after?

This probably reads like a teen girl diary. :-P

oh, I think it's very beautiful!!!!

Poetic and romantic. I also read the former threads. Maybe they allied to MAs or decide to work first.

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Nah, it just reads as humanist. Very cool, actually.

I do enjoy that some people from past application seasons have stuck around and put in their .02 every once in a while; it's nice that people still care even after their own personal stake in the matter is withdrawn. I would like to hear the stories of those who were rejected as well... What did you move on to? Did you apply again? Did you find a job? Are you happy?

Haha, that's what I am asking myself everyday now. I don't think I would get into a phd program this year. I think I experienced 2 weeks of depression, and a couple of ppl here pmed me and tried to cheer me up or give advices. It really helped.

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I don't think I'll get into a PhD program this year, either. That's fine with me; I'm young, and taking a couple years to get an MA, work, or spend time with my family doesn't seem like the end of the world. I'm trying as hard as I can to be happy and keep my world together regardless of this season's outcomes.

 

It is entirely possible that I will become one of the people this thread is reaching out to, and hopefully that ends happily for me. I actually don't doubt that it will. Today just feels good.

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This is sweet. I've been on gradcafe the last few years. I'm a longtime lurker that pops on now and again. I'm on my third round of PhD applications, and it's still unclear if it will work out for me this year. But I can't complain about the last two years and the life I've led outside of the PhD program I hoped I'd be in-- I'm a librarian! Rejection or not, life just keeps on keepin on. :)

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I can speak as one voice of experience.  I didn't apply to a PhD program after I got my M.A. in 1996 because I was horribly burned-out (I should have taken a year off between B.A. and M.A.). It took me years to get my love of literature and writing back. Life goes on, and it can be fulfilling and enriching and it can be awful and humiliating.  In fact, it will probably be a combination of all those things. After my M.A., I swept shrimp legs out of a restaurant carpet and asked people if they wanted fries with their burgers, but I also have had the opportunity to travel around the country, and perform fulfilling work, both financially and intellectually--after I opened myself up to all the possibilities the world has to offer. May be a cliche, but life will go on--it's a personal choice whether to just survive and beat yourself up over a perceived failure or inadequacy or you can find a way to live and thrive. The key is to be open to the consideration of changing your personal paradigm and not getting stuck like a puppy-dog in a window pining over this one thing, no matter how important it seems to you now. Or, you can also chose to have faith in your present paradigm, re-evaluate, retrench and try again next year:-) Either way, time is going to pass. Use that time wisely--even if it means you need to grieve.

 

ETA--just don't let youself get stuck--do what you can to keep moving forward.  Momentum is important after a big loss.

Edited by honeychurch
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I can speak as one voice of experience.  I didn't apply to a PhD program after I got my M.A. in 1996 because I was horribly burned-out (I should have taken a year off between B.A. and M.A.). It took me years to get my love of literature and writing back. Life goes on, and it can be fulfilling and enriching and it can be awful and humiliating.  In fact, it will probably be a combination of all those things. After my M.A., I swept shrimp legs out of a restaurant carpet and asked people if they wanted fries with their burgers, but I also have had the opportunity to travel around the country, and perform fulfilling work, both financially and intellectually--after I opened myself up to all the possibilities the world has to offer. May be a cliche, but life will go on--it's a personal choice whether to just survive and beat yourself up over a perceived failure or inadequacy or you can find a way to live and thrive. The key is to be open to the consideration of changing your personal paradigm and not getting stuck like a puppy-dog in a window pining over this one thing, no matter how important it seems to you now. Or, you can also chose to have faith in your present paradigm, re-evaluate, retrench and try again next year:-) Either way, time is going to pass. Use that time wisely--even if it means you need to grieve.

 

ETA--just don't let youself get stuck--do what you can to keep moving forward.  Momentum is important after a big loss.

Wow.

I really like your outlook and appreciate your advice.

I'm glad (is that the right word) to see you're applying again this year. Waitlisted or not. Best of luck.

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