ed2122 Posted August 13, 2014 Share Posted August 13, 2014 I'm just about to start my first year of my PhD program. Since I was accepted into the program, my now-fiance and I got engaged. We're older than most students in my program (29 - most new grads are 22-25) and we've been together forever so don't want to wait too long to actually get married. We are planning on early June of next year. So in addition to moving (twice - first by myself, then again in a few months when my fiance joins me) and starting a grad program, I will also be wedding planning this year. I'm aware I may be crazy. Luckily my mom will be playing a big part in the planning (she is retired) and funding, so it's not like I have to do it all myself. But it is something on my plate this year that will require my attention. Also, I think it would be super weird to not mention it to people I'm working with closely, especially since I might end up wanting to invite some of them. But I also don't want to start out my grad program by telling everyone right away and risk them thinking I'm not serious, I'm not going to be properly focused, etc. Not like marriage and a wedding is some ridiculous folly but still... perceptions can be weird in academia and I don't think any other students in the program are married. Heck, my secondary advisor (who I'll be working with this year while my primary advisor is on sabbatical) isn't even married himself. When should I mention this to my advisors or others in my program, and what's the best way to do it? I will be dealing with some wedding stuff pretty early in the semester (visiting venues on one weekend, and then trying to secure vendors that must be booked far ahead) and I don't want to seem like I'm hiding things, but at the same time I don't want that to be my first impression. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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