Nicole Gilbert

With this logic, you would certainly have little diversity of backgrounds, experiences and ways of thinking in academia. Academic communities are already too homogenous and eliminating the perspectives of those who hold more than their academic persuits isn't only not good for academics, it isn't good for acaedemia. I believe interdisciplinary thinking is already far too rare. I'm puzzled by those who believe knowledge, and the process of acquiring knowledge, can be nurtured in a vacuum. Entirely compartmentalizing your career from any other part of your life; living entirely in one area while denying others, eliminating exposure to experiences that may contribute to or inform your academic knowledge, is so isolationist that it doesn't logically ring true for me. Perhaps in hard science disciplines maintaining a finite focus yields results. In education, and many humanities disciplines, cross-pollination of ideas, activity in your mind and social-emotional development are part of what engages our intellect. Anyway, that is my experience as an educator. I also know from supporting learners that each student tackles and engages with education in different ways; each person is at a certain place in their own development. If your method is working for you now, you'll continue with it. If it does reach a point of deminishing returns you will feel that and succumb to it or change your process. In general, your method isn't one that best supports learning, productivity or mental health for the vast majority.

I am very excited to meet my Advisor-to-be next week. We are getting together for coffee and I'll have a chance to ask questions about the program before I formally make my decision. I have a few specific questions but I want to be thorough. I just wanted to put this out there, especially to current doc students: What questions did you ask that gave you a clear picture about the program, they dynamics of the department, expectations regarding the advisor/advisee relationship? What questions do you wish you had asked but didn't? It is difficult to think about what I really want to know because I don't know what I don't know. Any thoughts?

I'm in! I could simply not be more grateful and excited. My writing sample was focused on my research interests and they were well received. I simply could not be more grateful for the opportunity, the support and comradery from this site. Thank you, Sierra918!

I'm ecstatic to add to this thread! I teach high school. I was in my class with one of my students during my planning period and preparing for the world's most ridiculous meeting when the email came. I couldn't even comprehend it at first--I was shaking and freaking out. I took a deep breath and read it out loud, leapt up and down and freaked my student out, pulled myself together and smiled all the way through the meeting. I am so proud and so excited!

Okay, so I spoke too soon, friends. I was waiting for my formal rejection because I was not invited to the recruitment weekend. Today I got a very personal email from my POI informing me that I was accepted! I am completely over the moon. Thank you for all the support and encouragement! I'm getting a Ph.D.!

Friends, I want to thank you. I am planning on applying to several programs next cycle; my son will finish his BA next year and will also be applying to grad school. I'll have more room to move and I'm sure I'll land in the right program. I still have not officially received the rejection. The page still says "Decision Pending" and they say that we will know next week. Since there was already a recruitment weekend and acceptance letters have gone out, I'm not sure why they haven't officially sent the rejections. I don't want to indulge myself in any false hope--the jig is up--and I really am trying to just move on. About the personal statement: I spoke with my POI before applying and she is a the coolest, most approachable person. We had a great conversation and she gave me a lot of advice about my application, specifically my CV and personal statement. She was encouraging and seemed impressed with my professional background and publications. She was interested in my specific research and said I sounded like a good fit for her. She also said most people make the mistake of not being personal and said that the faculty really wants to have a sense of who candidates are and what genuinely motivates them. It's an educational theory Ph.D. so similarly to many social science disciplines personal background is regarded as pretty relevant. I am interested in researching achievement and opportunity gaps within specific populations. Mine is a story about how I was disenfranchised in the education system, and how I was ultimately able to transcend my limitations through education. I became an educator for reasons that are exemplified by my personal experience; I am becoming a researcher/teacher educator for reasons that are attached to my personal activism. Now I am really wondering where the balance is in what to share and not share. Anyway, I could beat the living hell out of this dead horse--and have. I know that what you all say is right on the money. It is a weird process, you never know what is going to tip the admissions committee toward or away from you. I am confident that there were many impressive candidates. It just didn't go my way this time. Perhaps when I am a tenured professor someday and mentoring grad students this experience will give me more compassion for their process. For now, I am going to take these wine bottles out to the recycle bin, get myself cleaned up and focus on giving my students what they need for the rest of this year while I come up with a solid plan for next year's employment and applications. Thanks for the community support and kindness. Good luck to each of you on your journies.

I'm completely devastated tonight. I know it is stupid but I applied to only one program this year. I selected the one I loved and put all my energy into it. I was in no position to do otherwise--I'm a school teacher and I could not move. I'm helping my son get through university and I can't move. The other programs in the area simply do not offer what I am looking for. Anyway, I applied. I put my brain, my heart and my soul into it. I have watched the boards and have seen that there was a recruitment weekend that I was not invited to; acceptance letters have been sent out and those who are fortunate enough to do so are making their decisions. I'm not among them. I have a weird background. I dropped out of high school, raised a child as a single parent, and worked hard through welfare reform to go to night school for my BA. I completed at the top of my class and went on to get a MA. Again, I graduated at the top of my class with a 4.0. I am a published author of creative non-fiction and of a textbook chapter for the American Counseling Association's book on social justice counseling practices. I have provided several teacher education professional learning seminars. I have been an educator in some of the poorest, most difficult schools for five years. I have great recommendations and nothing but exceptional evaluations...Yadah, yadah...I have my shit together. Anyway, here I am, 38, and I have weathered the storm. I didn't make the cut and I am struggling with these long-held insecurities that I am not good enough. I work at one of the hardest, most violent schools in the country and I dread returning next year. I had so hoped that I was good enough and could move on. I believe that my wierdo experience would make me an asset to a grad program. Apparently the admissions committee didn't agree. Here is my stupid question that you don't have an answer to either: How do I get through this and how do I plan my future? Does my impoverished an unconventional past make me less viable a candidate? Does the academy only love to study and romanticize the poor so long as they don't have to include us in the conversation? Is there a place for me? Should I drink more wine? Oh Lord! Maybe I just need some company tonight. Rough time, friends. Rough times, indeed.

I've heard nothing. I bought each of my recommenders a bottle of wine as a thank you gift. If I get in, I'll send them; if I don't, I'll drink them.

I'm reviving this thread for folks applying for Fall 2016 admissions. I'm still waiting and straight-up freaking out.

I completely feel you on all of it. I teach English in a priority Title One in Atlanta. It is an extremely difficult environment, and I am constantly exposed to so much hardship and tragedy. There are so many behavior issues and ridiculous loads of paperwork to justify all of our lessons, our data, parent contact, etc. It is overwhelming on my best of days. I love teaching and I love my students; I still believe in this work but I am burnt out at this point. If the actually teaching were even 50% of the job I could probably hang for another year. I am so afraid I won't get in and I'll be back here next year. I just can't. I am so ready to work on change on a systemic level. Good luck getting into your dream school!

Yeah, I am stress shopping, too. I like to tell myself that I am buying clothes because it is necessary--I'm going into a new phase of life with grad school, etc. Complete justification.

I am absolutely losing my mind right now. I know that all we can do is sit with this feeling but I feel like I am preemptively depressed about the rejection I might have to face. I don't know why I do this to myself. I know I have a competitive application but I have always had a bit of imposters syndrome. I'm a high school teacher and I am trying so hard to just focus on my kids and the work. I'm telling you, friends, if I were not trying to teach these children I would be loaded up on anxiety meds. Their decision cannot come quickly enough. Unless it is a rejection. Lord, I need to distract myself!

An absurd amount of cheese. Oh, and whiskey. We'll get through this.