Squawker

I added a section to my CV to explain the coursework I did. I also wrote briefly about a couple of courses in my SOP. When I wrote my statements for this past admissions round, I think I was too modest. I've heard that one reason women are less likely to be hired than men for the same position is that women tend to state their achievements and skills more modestly, whereas men are more confident about it. Not sure how true that is generally, but it definitely describes my approach! Next time I apply for PhD spots I will take a more straightforward approach, and won't bother talking about my weaknesses. No need to draw attention to that. However, hopefully by then, once I've done work on an MA, I won't have many weaknesses to deal with!

I added a section to my CV to explain the coursework I did. I also wrote briefly about a couple of courses in my SOP. When I wrote my statements for this past admissions round, I think I was too modest. I've heard that one reason women are less likely to be hired than men for the same position is that women tend to state their achievements and skills more modestly, whereas men are more confident about it. Not sure how true that is generally, but it definitely describes my approach! Next time I apply for PhD spots I will take a more straightforward approach, and won't bother talking about my weaknesses. No need to draw attention to that. However, hopefully by then, once I've done work on an MA, I won't have many weaknesses to deal with!

I added a section to my CV to explain the coursework I did. I also wrote briefly about a couple of courses in my SOP. When I wrote my statements for this past admissions round, I think I was too modest. I've heard that one reason women are less likely to be hired than men for the same position is that women tend to state their achievements and skills more modestly, whereas men are more confident about it. Not sure how true that is generally, but it definitely describes my approach! Next time I apply for PhD spots I will take a more straightforward approach, and won't bother talking about my weaknesses. No need to draw attention to that. However, hopefully by then, once I've done work on an MA, I won't have many weaknesses to deal with!

I added a section to my CV to explain the coursework I did. I also wrote briefly about a couple of courses in my SOP. When I wrote my statements for this past admissions round, I think I was too modest. I've heard that one reason women are less likely to be hired than men for the same position is that women tend to state their achievements and skills more modestly, whereas men are more confident about it. Not sure how true that is generally, but it definitely describes my approach! Next time I apply for PhD spots I will take a more straightforward approach, and won't bother talking about my weaknesses. No need to draw attention to that. However, hopefully by then, once I've done work on an MA, I won't have many weaknesses to deal with!

I added a section to my CV to explain the coursework I did. I also wrote briefly about a couple of courses in my SOP. When I wrote my statements for this past admissions round, I think I was too modest. I've heard that one reason women are less likely to be hired than men for the same position is that women tend to state their achievements and skills more modestly, whereas men are more confident about it. Not sure how true that is generally, but it definitely describes my approach! Next time I apply for PhD spots I will take a more straightforward approach, and won't bother talking about my weaknesses. No need to draw attention to that. However, hopefully by then, once I've done work on an MA, I won't have many weaknesses to deal with!

I added a section to my CV to explain the coursework I did. I also wrote briefly about a couple of courses in my SOP. When I wrote my statements for this past admissions round, I think I was too modest. I've heard that one reason women are less likely to be hired than men for the same position is that women tend to state their achievements and skills more modestly, whereas men are more confident about it. Not sure how true that is generally, but it definitely describes my approach! Next time I apply for PhD spots I will take a more straightforward approach, and won't bother talking about my weaknesses. No need to draw attention to that. However, hopefully by then, once I've done work on an MA, I won't have many weaknesses to deal with!

I added a section to my CV to explain the coursework I did. I also wrote briefly about a couple of courses in my SOP. When I wrote my statements for this past admissions round, I think I was too modest. I've heard that one reason women are less likely to be hired than men for the same position is that women tend to state their achievements and skills more modestly, whereas men are more confident about it. Not sure how true that is generally, but it definitely describes my approach! Next time I apply for PhD spots I will take a more straightforward approach, and won't bother talking about my weaknesses. No need to draw attention to that. However, hopefully by then, once I've done work on an MA, I won't have many weaknesses to deal with!

I added a section to my CV to explain the coursework I did. I also wrote briefly about a couple of courses in my SOP. When I wrote my statements for this past admissions round, I think I was too modest. I've heard that one reason women are less likely to be hired than men for the same position is that women tend to state their achievements and skills more modestly, whereas men are more confident about it. Not sure how true that is generally, but it definitely describes my approach! Next time I apply for PhD spots I will take a more straightforward approach, and won't bother talking about my weaknesses. No need to draw attention to that. However, hopefully by then, once I've done work on an MA, I won't have many weaknesses to deal with!

I added a section to my CV to explain the coursework I did. I also wrote briefly about a couple of courses in my SOP. When I wrote my statements for this past admissions round, I think I was too modest. I've heard that one reason women are less likely to be hired than men for the same position is that women tend to state their achievements and skills more modestly, whereas men are more confident about it. Not sure how true that is generally, but it definitely describes my approach! Next time I apply for PhD spots I will take a more straightforward approach, and won't bother talking about my weaknesses. No need to draw attention to that. However, hopefully by then, once I've done work on an MA, I won't have many weaknesses to deal with!

I added a section to my CV to explain the coursework I did. I also wrote briefly about a couple of courses in my SOP. When I wrote my statements for this past admissions round, I think I was too modest. I've heard that one reason women are less likely to be hired than men for the same position is that women tend to state their achievements and skills more modestly, whereas men are more confident about it. Not sure how true that is generally, but it definitely describes my approach! Next time I apply for PhD spots I will take a more straightforward approach, and won't bother talking about my weaknesses. No need to draw attention to that. However, hopefully by then, once I've done work on an MA, I won't have many weaknesses to deal with!

I added a section to my CV to explain the coursework I did. I also wrote briefly about a couple of courses in my SOP. When I wrote my statements for this past admissions round, I think I was too modest. I've heard that one reason women are less likely to be hired than men for the same position is that women tend to state their achievements and skills more modestly, whereas men are more confident about it. Not sure how true that is generally, but it definitely describes my approach! Next time I apply for PhD spots I will take a more straightforward approach, and won't bother talking about my weaknesses. No need to draw attention to that. However, hopefully by then, once I've done work on an MA, I won't have many weaknesses to deal with!

I always start a word document and write the bibliographic info for each source, then under each source just type out full (but not very long, if I can help it) quotations that I think will come in handy. I type out the full quotations to make sure I get the meaning right when I look the notes over later, and also since my university library sucks and there is a huge shortage of books, I normally don't have the luxury of keeping my books around me when I sit down to write the paper. So, by the time I've finished doing my reading for an essay (usually around 4000 words/15 pages?), I tend to have about 50 pages of typed notes. Then I spend a day just reading through them carefully and labeling each passage which whatever paragraph/theme I want to use it in. Then I create a new Word document in which I copy and paste all these quotes into a sort of outline, so I have all my notes sorted by theme. Then I just write the paper with that in front of me.

I developed this method over the course of my first two years of college, and since then I have never received an essay back with less than an excellent grade. Even one time when I realized as I was writing that I had no idea what I was talking about, the well-planned structure and abundance of footnotes it allowed for seems to have saved me and I still pulled off an impressive grade. This method is extremely tedious and inefficient, and I don't really recommend it because by depending on it I've made myself less capable of pulling a decent piece of writing out of my ass. That said, I think it's a really great way to approach long research projects, where you're checking out and returning multiple books at once, and keeping track of everything seems near impossible.

I always start a word document and write the bibliographic info for each source, then under each source just type out full (but not very long, if I can help it) quotations that I think will come in handy. I type out the full quotations to make sure I get the meaning right when I look the notes over later, and also since my university library sucks and there is a huge shortage of books, I normally don't have the luxury of keeping my books around me when I sit down to write the paper. So, by the time I've finished doing my reading for an essay (usually around 4000 words/15 pages?), I tend to have about 50 pages of typed notes. Then I spend a day just reading through them carefully and labeling each passage which whatever paragraph/theme I want to use it in. Then I create a new Word document in which I copy and paste all these quotes into a sort of outline, so I have all my notes sorted by theme. Then I just write the paper with that in front of me.

I developed this method over the course of my first two years of college, and since then I have never received an essay back with less than an excellent grade. Even one time when I realized as I was writing that I had no idea what I was talking about, the well-planned structure and abundance of footnotes it allowed for seems to have saved me and I still pulled off an impressive grade. This method is extremely tedious and inefficient, and I don't really recommend it because by depending on it I've made myself less capable of pulling a decent piece of writing out of my ass. That said, I think it's a really great way to approach long research projects, where you're checking out and returning multiple books at once, and keeping track of everything seems near impossible.

I used to work in food service and hated it when people would ask for "extra" ranch dressing, mayo, whatever (in quotations because their food came with neither, as they were paying for neither), because it involved digging the gigantic bucket of dressing out of the walk-in fridge and sticking my entire [gloved] hand down in there to reach the stuff with the scoop. Inevitably those who demanded free portions of dressing would then stand around whining about how "she's really taking her time in there" and about how we should really just have free portions of dressing sitting out ready for people to take.

I won't miss living far away from my family and many of my friends. I'm moving closer to home this time.

The ideal man for women like us owns his own very successful business and can move around! Perhaps he is even an artist and we get cool free art to hang in our homes. Since he works out of his studio at home, he can do things like bake fresh bread during the day and answer the door for plumbers and electricians.

Ultimately I'd rather be with someone less ambitious than I am because I wouldn't feel quite as much pressure about staying home to raise children. I'd love to have a husband whose career isn't so demanding that he can't spend any time helping out and having fun around the house. If things go swimmingly with my current boyfriend, that is the kind of lifestyle we can look forward to. My father had a high-paying job, but it required him to spend much of his time on business trips and he was not around very much. I'd rather not raise kids with someone who is only around half the time. I'm fine with doing my part around the house, but I'm not okay with being a full-time academic and a housewife at the same time.

It sounds like you should explain to him exactly what your reservations are about him attending the slave-wage program. Tell him bluntly that you don't think it's the best offer, and that you will not be able to come see him very often. I am in a somewhat similar situation to you in that my SO wants to move with me, essentially following me as I am quite a bit more ambitious than he is. On the one hand, this is great because it gives me the freedom to decide where I - and by extension we - are going to live. Also, it's nice to be with someone who knows how to relax and who makes me stop thinking about productivity for a short while. On the other hand, this freedom makes me feel responsible for the both of us, to the point where I become responsible for both of our futures and he can relinquish his own responsibilities, dumping them on me (along with all the housework). If he fails to find work where I go, then he can use me as a convenient excuse to explain to his family why he is unemployed and broke. I am worried that I will end up having to cover our expenses in the event that he can't find a job, as he hasn't even started looking at anything yet. I also don't want him to resent me for making him waste years of his life following me around aimlessly, if things don't end up working out. On a different note, I am worried about what my parents will think. He does not quite live up to the standards my family (and I myself) have set for me, but I am happy to forgo those traditional standards if he a least tries to rectify the situation.

For all these reasons, I am forcing myself to be blunt with him. I know that I would advise a friend in the same situation to break up with the guy, but I know that I would regret doing so myself. So I am instead telling him exactly what my expectations are for next year, and that in reality he should probably focus more on getting his own career on track instead of trying to live with me. I doubt either of us will be happy if, living together, I am insanely busy and he is unemployed. At least that way if we do break up, he will have a more stable life to fall back on. If your boyfriend wouldn't be happy attending the slave-wage program if you weren't living nearby, then I would personally discourage him from attending.

Sorry to usurp your thread with whining about my boyfriend, but I find that a few of my friends share similar problems in being with men who are less motivated to do well for themselves than they are. Often our anxieties seem to be rooted in very similar frustrations!

This time is the best, I think. All the pros of being able to say "yeah, I'll be going to grad school at X University next year" without the con of having to work. I will have one month off this summer, during which I plan to spend every moment drunk.

This time is the best, I think. All the pros of being able to say "yeah, I'll be going to grad school at X University next year" without the con of having to work. I will have one month off this summer, during which I plan to spend every moment drunk.

This time is the best, I think. All the pros of being able to say "yeah, I'll be going to grad school at X University next year" without the con of having to work. I will have one month off this summer, during which I plan to spend every moment drunk.

Really? Does that mean that I can be a "black person" without being black? Because I've really always wanted to become the singer from the 5th Dimension but my pastiness and lack of soul is hindering my progress a bit.

I am sorry to throw some more flame on the fire but this thread starts with an understandable request and turns it into a selfish and accusatory demand. As someone who is waiting for financial aid decisions from a number of schools I can say that there are a large number of reasons people wait for all this information to be finalized. A lot of them are financial. Predatory and juvenile? What makes you think that people who want more money per month from their schools do it because they are hungry for cash? If money was the main concern PhD seems like the wrong choice to begin with. Could it be possible that some people really need the extra 200 dollars to survive? Who are you to judge the motivations and circumstances of diverse applicants that you know absolutely nothing about. PhD application is tough and the decision is one that is going to affect you for a significant portion of your life. Do you want people to rush their admission decisions or to not try improving their aid package because YOU are on a waitlist? This is infuriatingly obtuse and makes me wonder if you would be pondering on the same issue when you were the one 'sitting on' admits. From the entitled attitude on your posts I highly doubt that you would be as considerate as you demand everyone else to be. This is a nasty way to let off steam in this frustrating times.

If there are really people who know exactly where they want to go and have all the financial issues sorted out but are using their admits to milk departments of their budgets although they don't need the extra money, shame on them. But your plea won't affect those guys. It will just end up frustrating people like me with a couple of acceptances but very little information on financial aid at all. We respect and want to be part of the departments we apply to and at least deserve the right to make a good decision after we receive all the relevant information. We don't need the impatient harassment of self-indulgent applicants.

I remember moving to the Northeast and being accepted into a fancy prep school for high school. I was terrified, assuming everyone would laugh at me for being a moronic country bumpkin, so I was very diligent about my summer reading and assignments. When I arrived in the fall, it turned out that I was one of only about 3 people in the entire class who actually did the summer reading, let alone the accompanying assignment. I realized that everyone at my fancy new school was just as much of a bumpkin as I was, and they were worse off for being so complacent, expecting success without doing any work. My early success in those classes gave me a huge boost of confidence, to which I think it's fair to attribute the academic success I've had in the past 8 years. Before then I was an average student, but I think it just took a bit of a challenge to make me realize I could be better. I think that going into a program with a bit of fear is likely to produce more success than going into it thinking it will be a breeze. Approaching each new thing you do as a unique challenge is probably the best way to gain from these experiences.

I used to work in food service and hated it when people would ask for "extra" ranch dressing, mayo, whatever (in quotations because their food came with neither, as they were paying for neither), because it involved digging the gigantic bucket of dressing out of the walk-in fridge and sticking my entire [gloved] hand down in there to reach the stuff with the scoop. Inevitably those who demanded free portions of dressing would then stand around whining about how "she's really taking her time in there" and about how we should really just have free portions of dressing sitting out ready for people to take.

I won't miss living far away from my family and many of my friends. I'm moving closer to home this time.

Being in a long distance relationship is actually a lot easier when you are swamped with work. You won't be bored and wondering what he's up to all the time, and you won't be thinking "I wish Johnny were here right now" the way you would be if you were having a fabulous time traveling or living a more relaxed lifestyle.

Skype is really amazing, and makes being apart much easier. Decide on a regular time that will be good for you to talk, with the understanding that social events with real people should sometimes take priority. Also, try not to spend lots of time talking on Skype, because it gets dull pretty quickly and being visibly bored or running out of things to say during a call can be hurtful and aggravating to the person on the other line. Folding laundry or eating something while on the line is fine, but keeping Skype open when you're doing something else that requires mental energy is a bad idea. I dated a guy who didn't understand why I got annoyed that he would play an online game during our conversations. Being on Skype can sometimes feel like having the other person in the room with you, but don't try to make it a replacement for real human presence. Keep the conversations reasonably brief and enjoyable.

For most people, the key to having a long distance relationship that doesn't fizzle out is to have plans for being together in the not-too-distant future. If your boyfriend is planning to stay in Charlotte indefinitely and you are just now starting a PhD program in Indiana, then the absence of any light at the end of the tunnel may weigh quite heavily on your relationship. But, of course, all relationships are different and I fully understand that some people are capable of putting their ideal love lives on hold for extended periods. Just remember, some people stay virgins well into their 20s (or indeed much longer), and there are lots of people who don't date anyone (or have any romantic/sexual experiences) for years at a time. Being in a long distance relationship can be frustrating, but if you were able to handle being a virgin and possibly not having a single boyfriend throughout puberty and adolescence, you can handle not being able to see your boyfriend every day.

Lastly, don't underestimate the importance of handwritten letters and snailmail correspondence!

This thread is very sad.