sgaw10

Haha, I am the infamous complainer! Thank you for the words though. I'm grappling with some guilt but also with wanting to assert my autonomy. Hope the new program works out well for you.

My mom and I don't get along. She told me a couple weeks ago that she spontaneously booked a trip to my new city. Never even asked me. This is the first week of grad school for me, and I'm already incredibly busy. Even after I insisted I did not want money, she demands that I make time for her to give me some after she criticized how my salary will not go very far. She also feels that my new school is lesser than my undergrad institution and does not hesitate to express that. She doesn't understand what I'm doing, which is fine, but she doesn't try understanding. My mom lashed out at me via text a couple months ago because she thought I misread and actually had to take more money from my family for tuition, which is not true. Unrelated but strange to mention is that she has a crude Twitter account with tens of thousands of followers, where I suspect she may be cheating on my dad in some sort of virtual relationship. My parents are trying to guilt me into hanging out with her, but this is something I really don't want to do. I'm not sure how I should go about it. I don't understand why it's my responsibility to entertain her on a whim. /endrant

Well, this it. First day of grad school starts tomorrow. Excited!

Quarters are so much better because you can take so many more classes. And yeah, in undergrad I liked not having any homework to do over breaks. Plus if you hate a topic in class, it does not drag on like it would in a semester. Oh well. I think it's mostly nostalgia for undergrad overall for me, though.

Confirmed my first rotation with a PI I truly admire. Had orientation today and feeling confident. Transitioning from quarter system to semester system will likely be rough at first. Otherwise I'm excited to begin!

Moved into my new apartment yesterday. I am homesick for my precious city for sure, but I'm proud of myself for driving so much stuff stuff five hours all by myself. And I have central AC for the first time in four years. Such a luxury!

Moving day in 9 days now. Trying to turn my relocation depression into excitement. Truthfully I am excited to be a grad student now, but it's hard to leave all of this behind. But I also haven't packed anything yet 😫

Yep. I'm moving from a city with one of if not THE best public transit systems in the country, and it's saddening.

I'm moving in less than a month now to start graduate school. As excited as I am, I'm also experiencing some relocation depression. The neighborhood and city as a whole from my undergrad mean the world to me, and it's so painful to let it go. It's the first place I've ever felt at home. And it feels strange moving from a huge city to a smaller one.

My school is on the quarter system.

Finished my last ever assignment of undergrad. Feels strange.

Thanks. I think I'm just gonna give up on it 😕

Yeah, frustrating to say the least. I replied that she clearly does not understand after I told her repeatedly how she doesn't need to worry about me financially, and I have nothing to pay the university. I'm only viewed as a potential dent to my family's wallet. I'm so excited to be completely financially independent.

I feel the same. Hoping to make the move all by myself.

My mom is giving me such a hard time. I try to cut her some slack because my parents don't have college degrees and thus know nothing about academia. But I have clearly explained to her multiple times that my PhD program provides a stipend, health insurance, and tuition remission, and that a PhD is not related to becoming a medical doctor (i.e. can get a doctorate in any field, from philosophy, to economics, to chemistry, etc). Yet she insists on "figuring things out" for me and thinks I don't know what I'm doing. She only cares about financial logistics, never once having asked me what my interests are, and fitting her ideal mold (overheard a few years ago that she just wants me to marry a rich doctor). Then she has a popular Twitter account where she interacts with creepy male followers who apparently know about me, because she tweeted she was "upset" that she would no longer be in the city where I currently live and has to tolerate my next location. She then says that my next school is "not as good" as my current school yet uses undergraduate rankings as support. She rarely ever comes to visit and would never willingly interact with a black person or ride public transportation despite putting these cities in her bio. And it feels as if she is taking credit for my hard work. Dont get me wrong -- I'm thankful for my parents' financial support. But this is insulting. This is her most recent text she sent me yesterday. Maybe I'm being a bit overly sensitive, but this sort of thing has been going on for years. So frustrating.