hadunc

Thanks, I really appreciate your taking the time to give me advice! As for meds, with anxiety it's considered better by the majority of doctors to take an anti-depressant rather than regular anxiety meds, as almost all of them are in the benzodiazepine family and are highly addictive (xanax, klonopin, etc.) I do take klonopin regularly right now which has been a huge help, by my doc said it's not a long term option as the effectiveness will eventually wear out and it might make the anxiety worse in the long run. However, when I was on Effexor (anti-depressant) I rarely ever had panic attacks. The only reason I stopped taking it is because it's a new drug and the long term effects really aren't known (that and I was in good place and able to deal with the occasional anxiety). I haven't heard of Kavinace, I'll have to look into that and the valerian root. I know I need to eat better and exercise more, but at the moment I'm flat broke and don't really have the resources to do either. I'm starting a temp job soon so I should be able to buy healthier food and join the YMCA once that gets going. In the meantime I go for walks, though that's hard sometimes with the bad weather in Chicago. My teaching assistantship at the school that's currently my top choice would definitely involve real teaching, specifically a freshman comp class with a max of 24 students. They also make you take a pedagogy class simultaneously that's supposed to offer support, plus a week-long orientation before the semester starts, so I guess I won't be totally unprepared. I would be teaching one class a semester and taking 3 courses. That doesn't seem too bad compared to some other offers I've heard about. But that's if I choose to attend that school, I haven't gotten the details on my other offer yet. I know the best thing I can do *if* I do start to panic in class is exactly what you said, but I know I need to stop thinking about it. I'm psyching myself out. As for the LDR thing, I will have access to skype/web cam and I will have a car. My fiance is still within driving distance so we will probably be able to visit each other twice a month. I'm just hoping that grad school will keep me busy enough not to think about the separation or the anxiety too much! Again, thanks for the advice!

I'm really glad to see a thread about mental health on this forum, as it's something that I'm fairly concerned about. I too have a history of anxiety and depression that started in high school but became a serious problem in college. I've been off meds for about a year and a half now, which was great, until I started having panic attacks again right around the time that I finished submitting my grad apps this year. At first I thought they were the result of being afraid of not getting accepted, but after two acceptances and one wait list and no negative feedback yet I am still struggling with the anxiety. I think panic disorder is especially hard to deal with because the anxiety can come seemingly out of nowhere, with no clear triggers. So I'm thinking it's time to go back on meds and stay on them through my first semester while continuing with therapy. To add to the stress, if I accept either offer I'll also be moving to a new city without my fiance for the time being, who has been my main support for the past few years, and leaving behind a great circle of friends. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't afraid of having a breakdown during the first semester. I'm particularly nervous about teaching, and possibly having a panic attack while teaching... If anyone else struggles with panic attacks and generalized anxiety and has any tips for getting through the first semester, they would be much appreciated!

I don't know much about the UC system, but if California decides to tax and regulate marijuana this year those budget woes my not be such an issue after all!

I can't understand how a school could come up with a wait list before they decide on acceptances....seems like if you are going to create a list of second choices, you should already have your first choices lined up, right? If the person wait listed wants to claim it, I'd love to hear if you got the same bizarre "deal" offered to you regarding the MA program.

Yup, I made MAJOR changes to my application the second time around. In fact, I completely changed my intended subfield. I wrote an entirely new writing sample independently, then presented at a conference. But my first application was really terrible, so I needed to make those changes! For me I think it was worth retaking the GRE, only because my scores weren't stellar last year (640V), and I'm almost certain it immediately cut me out of the running at a couple of the schools I applied to (to be fair I also reached pretty high the first time). Retaking the subject test was sooo not worth it though, because it was very different from the first test. I actually did worse the second time, and my first score was not impressive at all. Thank god only two schools asked for it! I think it's probably wise to make at least some changes to your application if it's not successful the first time, unless your problem was mostly due to fit, or otherwise try get something published or present at a conference.

I'll share mine, but please note that I really don't think it was my numbers that got me accepted, so I don't know that this info will be helpful for you. SUNY Buffalo especially seems to go much more by writing sample, SOP and research interests when they consider applications. That said, GRE scores were 690V, 610Q, 4.0 GPA in my major and 3.9 overall, did my undergrad at a very small and unknown liberal arts college in the midwest.

Yes and no. Some schools prefer students with MAs, some prefer BAs. A lot of people with BAs apply directly to PhDs, and many apply to a mix of both. But BAs certainly aren't "supposed" to only apply to MA programs.

Rogers Park is affordable if you're comparing it to the rest of the north side, but from what I hear from my friends who live in nearby neighborhoods, safety is still an issue there, especially at night. But then again, we all live in neighborhoods where we feel comfortable walking around at 2am, so the crime problem may be exaggerated. Bottom line, if you're ok with paying a lot of money for tuition and cost of living in Chicago, it's a good program, but it unfortunately comes with a high price tag.

I have no idea how many people they're offering this to, it might just be me. But if they are composing a wait list before even making decisions, who knows? My email came straight from the DGS. And yes, I would have to reapply for the PhD. So yeah, I really have no idea why they are even offering this to me, except for maybe they think I want to go there badly enough to pay at least partially for the MA. Like I said on the results board, no thanks!

Also, I don't know how many they're admitting but they supposedly had a "large number of applications for very few openings."

I didn't get much info at all, and I have a feeling they are being intentionally vague. I'm not sure this bargaining process is completely kosher. I ran the offer by one of my LOR writers, and she told me that this is not protocol and is potentially unethical. This is what I think is going on, after giving it some thought. Since I'm a re-applicant, they probably figure that I really want to attend their program. They also know that last year when I was on the wait list I was pretty desperate. I think they're basically trying to get me into their department at the cheapest price possible. They're essentially giving me two options: make a gamble by staying on the wait list, or take their consolation prize that may or may not have some funding attached, the catch being that to find out if there's funding, I have to take my name off of the wait list. Needless to say I'm not very happy about the way they are handling the situation. I kind of expected better from Loyola, especially since they were so nice last year.

I've also heard good things about their program. Grad students and faculty seem to be very happy with the school. However, from what the email that I got said I think the MAs will only be partially funded and they are only offering them to a couple of students. Personally, I wouldn't want to pay anything for an MA regardless of the school, but that's just me. Also, Loyola's funding even for PhDs is pretty low and living in Chicago is very expensive. If you do an unfunded or partially funded MA there you should probably expect to end up significantly in debt.

When did you receive that email? I was accepted but I don't think I ever got one! Weird.

Someone on the results board posted that there were 11 funded spots available this year, so if that info is accurate they may very well still have some admits to hand out.

I've seen this site too and have wondered the same thing. I think they're data might be somewhat outdated, but I can't say for sure. If anyone knows how reliable this site is I'd love to know.

LUC is a great program and everyone who goes there seems to love it, and they were very friendly and helpful when I was waitlisted (and eventually rejected) last year. I was just a little put off by the bargaining strategy they seem to be trying to use this time around. I emailed back asking for more details, I'll update everyone if I get any helpful info.

I have to disagree with you that applying to more than 8 schools signifies that an applicant doesn't know what they're doing. I personally applied to 11 schools, each of which I could have seen myself at for one reason or another. The reality is that applying to less than 8 schools might be risky in this economic climate. I applied to 7 last year and was rejected across the board. So please don't assume that just because someone applied to quite a few programs it means that they aren't serious about their work. Also, how are you distinguishing between the serious applicants and the ones who have "'I don't really know what I want to be when I grow up' etched all over their lists"? Without knowing their subfield and the numerous other factors that lead a person to choose to apply to a school, how can you judge? I get angry when people are snarky about the prestige of certain programs on the results page, but I think your anger is a bit misdirected here. Also, I have no idea who on earth would consider a top 25 school a "safety." UNC-Chapel Hill is an excellent program, and not easy to get into from what I understand. If that's where you hope to end up, I wish you the best of luck!

Hi Muffinlit, I was the one who posted that result. I got an email from Pamela Caughie saying that while they are still making decisions on admits, they apparently already put me on the wait list. They are doing things differently this year--last year I applied and was notified via mail sometime in March. Essentially she emailed me to ask if I'd like to be taken off of the PhD wait list in exchange for an admit to their *possibly* funded MA program. Seemed kind of strange to me. I get the idea that they are overwhelmed with applicants and are trying to eliminate as many people from the PhD pool as possible. I will more than likely be turning down their offer but I'm holding off until I go to another school's recruitment week.

Did you apply to the English or the Literature department? I feel like I'm the last person still waiting on Duke, and it's getting very frustrating. I wish they'd just post my rejection, since interviews are at the end of this month and I didn't get an invite.

Chrissy88, I come from a very similar background: small, virtually unknown Midwestern liberal arts college where most English majors pursue careers as k-12 teachers or professional writers. I don't know of anyone from my graduating class attempting to pursue a PhD in Lit. My profs were as helpful as possible but I ultimately had to navigate the application process on my own and subsequently learned quite a bit. I would be happy to share advice/insight as I know how harrowing this process usually is, and having been through it twice now I might be of some help. PM me if you're interested in talking!

No, I'm actually what they call an "on-call nanny" for a work options program, which means that employees of companies enrolled in this program have access to emergency daycare if their usual arrangements fall through or their child gets sick or something. It cuts down on employee sick days. It's basically a temp job to bide my time until I figure out if I'm going to be moving away to another city or not. Usually permanent nanny jobs require at least a one-year commitment.

Did anyone else notice this post? University Of Faggotry Race Relations, PhD (F10) Rejected via Postal Service on 15 Feb 2010 A 15 Feb 2010 Told in an email that I was "accepted not for my scholastic achievement, research or other valid qualifications, but because we desperately need a hermaphrodite eskimo in the department to satiate the gods of diversity." It feels good to know others think I'm not smart enough to get through things without help from affirmative action. Yikes!!

YES, this is a major addiction for me! So much so that my fiance worries about me sometimes lol. And now that I have an acceptance at a school in another city that's only made it worse! Other than browsing Craigslist, I've been catching up on Lost starting with season one which has consumed a LOT of my time. I've also been reading a lot, spending lots of time with friends, and of course checking this website and the status of my apps obsessively. You'd think having an acceptance would make this process easier, but I'm probably even more antsy now! Fortunately I recently found a temp job as a nanny that should decrease the amount of time I have to waste.

I applied last year and all I got was a status change on my app (not even an email telling me to check it, I just happened to log in) followed a couple weeks later by an official rejection letter. I'm not really sure why I decided to reapply this year since I've never really felt good vibes from their department, other than the fact that going there would mean not having to relocate to a new city. But from what other posters have said about their funding issues, even if I were to be accepted this time around I think I'll be turning it down.

I've been following this discussion and I thought I'd throw my 2 cents in. I think there are probably many of us who share this frustration that you're voicing. But I think it may have more to do with the philosophies of individual institutions than with the field as a whole. It also has to do with what your particular research interests are. For instance, my interests are interdisciplinary in nature. I will have to pull from many disciplines and methodologies, and I find that very exciting. To a certain degree we are bound by the "established approaches/methodologies/knowledge," but that's pretty much the nature of any kind of intellectual inquiry; I always say, you have to learn the rules before you can learn how to break them. I guess what I'm trying to say is that you are only as constrained as you want to be. There are without a doubt a growing number of institutions that embrace and encourage interdisciplinary work and aren't so set on pigeon-holing their students into narrow sub-fields. In fact, I think the market is going to demand that we all become more generalized in our interests in the future, but that's just my opinion. It seems to me the tides are turning, but I could be wrong. I hope I'm not!