psychdork

Voodoo doll

Wet dog

Strike out

Together again

Quarter horse

Last year I didn't want everyone knowing that I was applying, so I only told a few people (including my parents). Now, I never told my parents that I was keeping it quiet (not like they would listen if I did) but since I never got any questions about it from other family/friends I just figured they never told anyone. So around mid-March last year, I'm sitting at a family party and the following conversation occurs: Cousin (loudly): "So I hear you are moving to Pennsylvania!?!". Me: No...where did you hear that? Cousin: "My dad said that you are moving there, he heard it from your dad." Me: "What? I'm not moving to Pennsylvania. Why would he say that?" Cousin: "He said you're going there for grad school." Me: "You mean because I applied to Penn State? I just applied that's all! I applied to a lot of schools all over the country." Cousin: "Oh, well my dad is telling everyone you are going there." Me: *sigh* Aunt (laughing): "You know how he always gets everything confused!" That was fun to work out.

I can relate on the "what's wrong with me?" part. I won't go into specifics, but there isn't any part of my application that has a glaring flaw. Now, I would most likely never get into a school like Harvard, but I'm definitely qualified (and competitive) for many other excellent schools and yet this is my fourth round. This past year I did the same thing as you (while continuing to work in my field), and I'm hoping that maybe that will finally work. Hopefully it will for both of us!

Winter break

I do my best to remain anonymous on here, but given that my situation is somewhat unusual, it is possible that someone from my current institution could figure it out. I know a few people who check GC and so I'm careful to remain vague about specifics. I've been a member of the forums for several years now and as far as I know, only two people actually know who I am (and that's because I chose to reveal my identity). As some posters can attest, I'm more personal in PM's but even then I'm still cautious. One of my profs found out through another student that I check the results board on here. At first he kind of scoffed at the idea, but then later in the semester started warming up to the idea, to the point of asking me if my remaining schools had been mentioned yet.

High maintenance

risk taker

power play

spit take

the secret

golf clubs

wall shelf

water gun

electric guitar

cup holder

new roots

green grass

It's completely normal. I've found that dealing with this is like being on an emotional rollercoaster. One minute I feel like I could get acceptances to most - if not all - of my programs. The next minute it's another round of flat out rejections. The best advice I can give you (besides not looking at your submitted applications) is to do your best to distract yourself from this. Take up a hobby, take an exercise/dance class, play video games, whatever works for you. It's hard, believe me I know. But most programs won't even begin contacting applicants for interviews until January, so we basically have a month to wait before we will hear anything. I'm telling myself I can't even start wondering/worrying about this until the winter semester starts at my university. I don't want to be obsessing about this over break when I can be doing something fun and relaxing. I'll start once I'm busy with the new semester. Now that's not to say I won't think about this, because believe me I will, but I won't let myself obsess about the what-ifs. If you can't figure out a distraction, one thing I did last year was to confront my fear and figure out what I would do if the worst case scenario (flat out rejections) happened. If you have a plan, then it isn't as scary. And to be perfectly honest, not getting in anywhere sucks, but it isn't the end. If you want to talk about it PM me.

Mailed my last two applications Wednesday (both paper apps), so all of my applications are now in. And all of my LORs are in as of yesterday (first deadline was today so that stressed me out a bit!). I'm pretty sure all schools have received my transcripts & GRE scores, so one more check (and probably a double-check lol) sometime this week and then I will do my best to forget about this for the next month or two. Easier said than done, but I'm going to do my best.

sad eyes

end scene