Emailing POI to ask why you were rejected

[finalcountdown]

I've been told admission process can be as complex, random, biased, unpredictable as possible. But when you feel you had a good interaction with your POI, your proposed research is the topic of interest around the world and the 'fit' also fits, the rejection just doesn't seem right. This school is your first choice and you can't help but ask why. If only to know the areas of improvement. So, I'm debating whether it's wise to email my POI and ask how I could've made my application better. Would this reflect negatively on me?

[CogEdPsych11]

I've been told admission process can be as complex, random, biased, unpredictable as possible. But when you feel you had a good interaction with your POI, your proposed research is the topic of interest around the world and the 'fit' also fits, the rejection just doesn't seem right. This school is your first choice and you can't help but ask why. If only to know the areas of improvement. So, I'm debating whether it's wise to email my POI and ask how I could've made my application better. Would this reflect negatively on me?

I don't see anything wrong at all with emailing your POI. As long as you're sincerely asking for ways to improve your application, rather than suggesting they should reconsider, I actually think it's a good thing to do.

[qbtacoma]

I would say something like:

Hello Dr. X,

I just got notice that I haven't been offered a space this year, and while I'm disappointed I understand that there are many factors that go into the decision-making process. May I ask if there is anything I can do to make my application more competitive for next year?

Just be polite and I'm sure no one will take offense.

[Mind_Left_Body]

You might want to wait a few more months.....to let things calm down a bit with the admissions crunch. Just my $0.02.

[DrPepper-olic]

At the risk of sounding like a total mom, I want to stress etiquette. I work for and with professors. I've been through one round of grad school. I certainly think that we, as students, must be our biggest advocates. I also know that professors want us to acknowledge the effort they put into helping us out, when it's really not in their job description.

I would definitely wait a month or two to email. If you email immediately after being rejected you will probably come across as entitled, emotional, or impatient. Since this is your perfect fit, you don't want to burn bridges with your POI. After all, you may decide to reapply next year or to apply to a post doc there.

After a few months, this news will have soaked in, and you will have had some time to reflect, to figure things out, and to return to your "normal" self. (Read: Admissions time is to grad students what that potion was to Dr. Jekyll.) At that point, you should email your POI to thank him/her for corresponding with you before the admissions process. Express your gratitude for his/her time spent informing you about the department's particulars. Be gracious. Then you could add that you were disappointed not to have been admitted and that you are curious about ways that you could make yourself a better applicant in the future.

It's better to err on the side of deferential if you want to keep this contact open for future possibilities (like a post doc).

Love, mom. <3

[RestorationJunkie]

There's a thread about this in the Lit/Rhet/Comp subforum that might interest you:

[LJK]

At the risk of sounding like a total mom, I want to stress etiquette. I work for and with professors. I've been through one round of grad school. I certainly think that we, as students, must be our biggest advocates. I also know that professors want us to acknowledge the effort they put into helping us out, when it's really not in their job description.

I would definitely wait a month or two to email. If you email immediately after being rejected you will probably come across as entitled, emotional, or impatient. Since this is your perfect fit, you don't want to burn bridges with your POI. After all, you may decide to reapply next year or to apply to a post doc there.

After a few months, this news will have soaked in, and you will have had some time to reflect, to figure things out, and to return to your "normal" self. (Read: Admissions time is to grad students what that potion was to Dr. Jekyll.) At that point, you should email your POI to thank him/her for corresponding with you before the admissions process. Express your gratitude for his/her time spent informing you about the department's particulars. Be gracious. Then you could add that you were disappointed not to have been admitted and that you are curious about ways that you could make yourself a better applicant in the future.

It's better to err on the side of deferential if you want to keep this contact open for future possibilities (like a post doc).

Love, mom. <3

I concur with most of what DrPepper-olic said but as long as you are capable of being respectful and gracious now, I don't see why you would need to wait. You want to give yourself as much time as possible to deal with any perceived holes in your application. Make 5 non-crazy people (non current grad applicants) read anything you decide to send to make sure that you are coming through with the tone you intend and you should be fine.

[repatriate]

This came up last year here:

The responses are mixed in with other discussion, but some of them include:

Generally speaking, I don't think it can hurt you to ask and the usefulness of the response (if any) will depend greatly on the POI you are writing to.

I agree with the advice to wait. If you email now, you may come off as impatient (why aren't you willing to wait until the current admissions cycle is over and all of your results are in to find out if the question is even necessary to ask?) and annoy people who are currently working hard to sort through and recruit from the non-rejected applicants (and assume they are done with the rejected ones). Once April 15th passes and the admissions cycle is largely over, that is probably the best time to email.

[Strangefox]

You might want to wait a few more months.....to let things calm down a bit with the admissions crunch. Just my $0.02.

In a few months a POI might forget details about application. There is nothing wrong in doing it right now, I believe. I did that right after I was rejected from a program I liked and my POI sent me a great long reply almost immediately.

[Strangefox]

There are some people here who say you should wait so I want to reiterate (though it is my humble opinion, of course ).

If you wait - they might just forget details of your app and why you were rejected. They remember them now, they have just been discussing your app with ad comms. But in a few month they will have to rack their brains thinking why oh why this guy was rejected

There is nothing bad in being sad and impatient. Waiting for results is stressful, rejections are painful, they must understand that.

Just make sure you sound polite and show that you are not angry with your POI, just curious why you were rejected. Sound professional, but not to curt, emotional but not hysterical

And it will be fine.

I did that - it was great. I showed my POI how much I appriciate their help in the application process and thought I am sad I am able to move on. We exchanged a couple of letters and now I know that if I meet that person at a conference there will be no uneasiness between us.