Application regrets?

[JennyFieldsOriginal]

This was my first time doing graduate applications and after I sent everything a sinking feeling of regret is coming over me.

I don't know if I should have added a safety school that was more "safe" than the two that I have.

For some context: I basically let my most trusted professor write me a list of places to apply to. He gave me 15 and I picked 12. He's familiar with admissions committees and knows my work well, and I gave him the scoop on my test scores and grades. I'm torn between my faith in this person to steer me on the right path and my constant panic that I'm not going to get in ANYWHERE and I'm going to have to do this again.

I keep thinking that my other two letter writers who also know me very well obviously saw where I applied, and I think at least the one would have said something to me if I had applied to all the wrong places. But I guess it's awkward to tell someone "yeah you should aim lower...way lower...still lower...getting warmer".

Is anyone else in this position? Would someone have said something to me? The thing that gets to me is that people applied and got across the board rejects and obviously had professors in their corner writing for them that thought they'd get in.

Apologies for the whining/asking unanswerable questions. I think a little uncertainty and regret is just a part of the process, but any wisdom would be much appreciated.

[katalytik]

This was my first time doing graduate applications and after I sent everything a sinking feeling of regret is coming over me.

I don't know if I should have added a safety school that was more "safe" than the two that I have.

For some context: I basically let my most trusted professor write me a list of places to apply to. He gave me 15 and I picked 12. He's familiar with admissions committees and knows my work well, and I gave him the scoop on my test scores and grades. I'm torn between my faith in this person to steer me on the right path and my constant panic that I'm not going to get in ANYWHERE and I'm going to have to do this again.

I keep thinking that my other two letter writers who also know me very well obviously saw where I applied, and I think at least the one would have said something to me if I had applied to all the wrong places. But I guess it's awkward to tell someone "yeah you should aim lower...way lower...still lower...getting warmer".

Is anyone else in this position? Would someone have said something to me? The thing that gets to me is that people applied and got across the board rejects and obviously had professors in their corner writing for them that thought they'd get in.

Apologies for the whining/asking unanswerable questions. I think a little uncertainty and regret is just a part of the process, but any wisdom would be much appreciated.

I am not sure I am in the same situation, but I do know a person who boasted about how his LOR would carry the weight to get me into any school. I was not sure how, but I was excited and felt I should trust him. Over time, I realized it is all hot air. We need to depend on ourselves a lot more.......no one will care about your apps more than you. having said that, maybe there are other schools where you can still apply? i am working on my last one and the deadline is Jan 15.

[melusine]

take this from someone who's spent the past term basically polling every prof that would give me the time of day about what my chances were, *really*..

the answer, especially from my recommenders, was pretty unanimous: writing rec letters to undergrads is an annoying/tedious process. it also amounts to a professional in your field laying their name down for your sake. (if you turn out to be a fiasco in your future school, they're partially to blame and their reputation would suffer).. to sum up> THEY WOULD NOT DO IT IF THEY DIDN'T BELIEVE YOU HAD (at least) A DECENT SHOT AT ACCEPTANCE.

hope that's as reassuring to you as it was to me. (a mild reassurance, i'll give you that, but desperate times... )

[johndiligent]

My application regrets:

1. I wish I'd gotten everything underway a little sooner. I wasn't bad in terms of timeline but I wish I'd done more in depth research like contacting faculty sooner so that I wasn't still striking schools off the list in late October.

2. I wish I would have applied to more schools.

3. I wish I'd seriously investigated application fee waivers.

4. I wish I had asked more senior scholars in the discipline for advice on where to go.

[Kinkster]

I should have applied to more schools. I am scared of getting rejected everywhere and having to wait another year to try again...

[JennyFieldsOriginal]

All that makes a lot of sense and I appreciate the perspective.

I hadn't really thought as much as I should have about the fact that my professors are attaching their names to my application.

Of course I could still talk all day about things I wish I would have done differently.

Anyway, hopefully in a few months we will all have success stories and this weird chapter will be all over.

Edited January 7, 2010 by JennyFieldsOriginal

[JohnBom]

So far, I have no regrets. I researched the heck out off all the schools I applied to and I am confident they are all great matches to my interest. I have very low chances of being accepted, but I would hate myself if I didn't try to reach for the stars. Another reason why I didn't apply to any safeties is because I love my job. It's within the field and I don't mind staying.

[alexis]

THEY WOULD NOT DO IT IF THEY DIDN'T BELIEVE YOU HAD (at least) A DECENT SHOT AT ACCEPTANCE.

Ditto. My strongest LOR writer (who maybe tends to divulge a little too much information to me about other students, but I selfishly don't mind) told me that one of my peers--who is also applying to similar PhD programs as me--had a list of schools that the professor thought was way out of this student's league. She (the professor) told the student straight up, "send me a more realistic list." The student had some top programs on there, and the professor wouldn't write her an LOR without some more medium/lower schools on there. I know she was ultimately trying to help the student out and be realistic, but that must have stung. My point is, though, most professors will probably be honest with you. If you are following your professor's advice about programs, and the other LOR writers don't disagree, this is a VERY GOOD SIGN. We all are panicking that we aren't going to get in anywhere, but I think you (OP) have really good chances based on your description and the number of programs you're applying to.

[rising_star]

My PhD application LOR writers thought I aimed a bit too low... But I'm happy with where I ended up.

[UnlikelyGrad]

My PhD application LOR writers thought I aimed a bit too low... But I'm happy with where I ended up.

Ditto.

[Deleted]

I should have applied to more schools. I am scared of getting rejected everywhere and having to wait another year to try again...

Same for me. More than the wait, what would bother me is to ask the LoR to write letters again

[gazelle]

I still feel pretty good about one, but the other one the more I think about it the more I think I could've made it better; after I submitted it more information came out from the school about how to really make it strong and I hit most of their points, but even a few key changes to a few key sentences could've made my SoP that much stronger. Also just in general I think I'm a weak applicant for one of my schools. *sigh*

[BCHistory]

I would have liked to apply to two more schools. With both of them, I somehow simply overlooked the programs, and I have no idea how I missed them. Oh well.

Also, I am concerned with one of my three LOR writers, and if I could do the whole thing over again, maybe I would consider switching to another professor. But the more that I think about it, the latter professor, while he may have known me better, was out of my field, and for other reasons which I won't get into, could be a liability had he written for me. I agree with the posters above that unless these professors are irrationally malicious (which I seriously doubt they are), they are not likely to risk their reputations writing letters for grad school candidates who are obviously unqualified for the work.

[grad_wannabe]

I had two trusted professors tugging me in two different directions - one told me over and over again that I should only be applying to east coast schools ("you need to get out of California, see something different, meet different people!").

The other fell all over himself to get me a meeting with a department head at a school outside Los Angeles. He actually called me over the holidays to say, "Did you apply to X school yet? You didn't? Why not? They're perfect for you! Here's what I'm going to do for you..." So at that point, I felt like i HAD to apply to his school.

And then I felt shitty telling the first professor, "Hey, I know you said not to apply to schools here, but so-n-so was really pushing this one program, and ... I think I'm going to apply. I hope that's okay with you... " I felt like I was taking his advice and throwing it in his face.

Felt weirdly torn and angsty about it for awhile, but I'm trying to reassure myself that this is MY life, not theirs to play with, and I shouldn't worry about offending anyone with my choices.

[sew8d]

I had two trusted professors tugging me in two different directions

Me too! Mine I think was more based on their different focus in the Spanish field - one does peninsular literature, the other does Latin American, specifically Mexican.

But it was funny to meet with both and hear one guy trash the suggestions of the other... but more disconcerting.

I also regret not applying to a couple more and turning things in sooner - I had everything pretty much ready, but I couldn't just hit send... It was all there by deadlines, but you know.

[coyabean]

All that makes a lot of sense and I appreciate the perspective.

I hadn't really thought as much as I should have about the fact that my professors are attaching their names to my application.

Of course I could still talk all day about things I wish I would have done differently.

Anyway, hopefully in a few months we will all have success stories and this weird chapter will be all over.

Take this with a grain of salt because it is all secondhand as I am in the same boat as you BUT every person I met during my fellowship last year said this. Academia is insular to the point of inbreeding. They trust the opinion of their peers more than any test or GPA because they understand all of the variables in those measurements. Consider it like peer review in publishing -- you are not legitimate until an established scholar cosigns you. By writing you a letter this is what is happening.

I still find it hard to process, too. I come from working for ten years where I've never had anyone care enough to vouch for me. LOL I watched people get promoted based on family and friends. I never imagined I'd be in such a circle so I'm pessimistic to the point of paranoia. But I've had no fewer than FOUR active scholars pull me aside and basically say, "look, XYZ CHOSE you. that matters. do your part but believe s/he is doing theirs, too."

So, maybe that helps?

[JerryLandis]

I wish I had applied to at least one more program, which I overlooked. Other than that, I don't think there was too much more I could have done aside from finishing my thesis weeks in advance to use as a writing sample for my earlier deadlines, instead of submitting a crappier sample. In any case, although I'll be very upset if I don't get into any PhD programs, when I do reapply at least I will have basic materials ready to go, instead of starting from scratch again like I did this time.

[Pamphilia]

1. I wish that I had looked more rigorously into fee waivers.

2. I wish that I had visited schools and talked to faculty in person prior to applying, rather than just emailing. I think I am weird and annoying, but apparently I interview very well and generally make a good first impression. Who knew??? Anyway, since most English programs don't do interviews, I wish that I had a chance to establish my sparkling personality in person.

3. I wish that I were applying during better economic times--for example, a year when Penn English was accepting more than 5 of 680 applicants.

[expressionista]

For two of my four applications, I really don't feel like I personalized my personal statement enough towards those specific schools. They were the first two that I wrote, and I just wasn't thinking about it enough. On the plus side, I'm applying to professional masters' programs where fit isn't quite as big of a deal as for like a PhD or research-based degree.

I also think my portfolio is way too short. I made it 10 pages because one of the schools I applied to had a 12 page limit, but then all of the other ones I've seen from people online are like 30-40 pages! I just really feel like 10 pages is enough, like if I added more, it would just be more of the same kind of stuff (plus I didn't include fillers like divider pages, blank front and back pages, etc. like I've seen a lot of people doing). Anyway, it stresses me out.

[gazelle]

Another regret with the school I don't feel too good about--they wanted a detailed quantitative resume with descriptions of all quantitative courses I took, course overviews, and quantitative methods applied. The site said they wanted to know "...as much as possible...". Well, being a chemical engineering major, my quantitative resume was ten pages long. I waffled back and forth on whether to send it or not or cut it down dramatically, but at the end of the day I sent it since it did indeed say "...as much as possible..." and it's a quant-heavy program. I feel like I could've made it three pages, and just wrote something at the end summarizing the use of many of the same/extensive quantitative methods throughout my courses. Ugh.

[solairne]

I wish I had applied to the MA program in Romance Linguistics as a backup. I'm very happy with my candidacy, but I'm getting a little bit anxious that it was a bad idea to apply to only PhD programs straight out of my BA.

In all honesty, however, I'm really pretty happy with everything I did. I've been planning it out methodically since February 2009. I think the wait is just driving me to pick apart every little thing. All in all, I'm happy with what I did.

[Tall Chai Latte]

My PhD application LOR writers thought I aimed a bit too low... But I'm happy with where I ended up.

Love your House quotes!

[Timothy Vallier]

Very specifically. I wish I would have applied to NYU GSAS instead of NYU Steinhardt. I guess I overlooked (even after visiting) that one was more geared towards my interests than the other. Also, GSAS offers full fellowship to all who are admitted. Needless to say, I am embarrassed.

[SuddenlyParanoid]

I feel like I applied to enough schools, 13 total, but I wished I had applied to a broader spread rankings wise. I applied to 9 of the top 10, and then 4 of 11-20. Wish I had added a safeties instead of more reaches.

[jacib]

I sent in half of my BA thesis as my writing sample.... and lately I've been wondering if I sent in the wrong half, or if religion programs should have gotten this half, and the sociology programs the other half.