spectastic

success has a lot more to do with one's emotional intelligence than anything else. an investment banker can be the best math geek out of mit, but he/she's going to hit a ceiling eventually, limiting constraint being the ability to deal with people's emotions, understanding the self, what motivates the self, what motivates others, etc. the CEO doesn't make 270x more than the average employee because he/she has 270x more computing power. These positions are obtained through social interactions. as you may have heard repeatedly, and likely will continue to hear in the future (a lot), it's less about what you know or what you say, but more about who you know and how you say it. 

I appreciate the feedback guys. I agree it's good to have a support group. I'm not particularly close with my cohort (we're co-workers/teammates, but I wouldn't consider them close friends or anything), but I do have other grad students in other labs/departments that I can see myself being buddies with. 
#3 really resonates with me. I feel like the expectation of grad school is for me to dedicate nearly all of my time and effort to it. but I see it differently. Sure, I'll put in my 40-50 hours (that's about my sweet spot too), but I also want to grow in other areas. For one, I've been in the real world, and developing a social circle outside school is an uphill battle. In that regard, being in grad school, having access to all these activities is actually a HUGE perk. In college, I missed out on a lot of opportunities to socialize and network. Now that I have all these resources once again at my disposal, I'm going to use it. It's not going to be my top focus, but I'll definitely try to be more opportunistic about it this time, compared to my last go around.

hobbies, church, student organizations, to name a few

someone should start a different thread....

yea no kidding

i try to do everything electronically now. hard copies are harder to keep track of. especially when the lecturer uses slides, it's helpful to just pull up copies of those slides and write notes in them, instead of wasting effort to copy what they write down.
I use xodo app to edit pdf files, and i think evernote is popular for actual note taking.
most tablets support this kind of stuff. not as precise as paper, but I still like it better than paper.

someone should start a different thread....

i cuddle with my cat. i think it's starting to get serious between us.
 
seriously though. my problem is not being proactive going out and meeting people. last year, I was talking to girls, getting phone numbers, etc. but these are shallow relationships.. and I'm much less interested in that now that research and school has me by the balls.
I've got cycling friends, but boy:girl ratio sucks for me. thought about going to church again. that's a good way to meet people right?

These things don't matter. 
A GPA that low will be hard to overcome, but I would look at MA programs as a stepping stone.
But the most important question: why do you want a PhD?

Chernobyl 

people in general are basics. they go to work in a job they hate, buy things they don't need, in order to afford nice things, so that they can impress people they don't like, and post that shit on social media to make their lives seem awesome. no wonder so many of them are on antidepressants. this is as much true for people in academia as anywhere else. a lot of people stumble into a phd without a real incentive to really be there. I kid you not some of them want to spend 5 years of their lives and opportunity cost from a real job just to have a "PhD" on their resume. interesting people are everywhere though. you just have to look harder. 

I interpret 9-5 as a steady work schedule (it could also be 9/80, or 4/10, or some kind of 40 hours/week give or take) where you show up for a period of time, work, and go home to enjoy your free time (which i likey much), while in grad school that number is definitely north of 40h/wk (with much higher standard deviation, which I guess is what is referred to as "freedom"), and that salary is waaayyy south. that said, having autonomy in the workplace (which I agree is a huge perk of grad school) and having a 9-5 aren't mutually exclusive. some of the most successful companies with some of the happiest employees have 9-5 schedules, and part of their strategy is to allow some kind of freedom for their employees to do whatever they want work related during some of their work schedule. 3M is a great example in that they allocated 10-20% of their employees' schedule to think about ideas that are completely unrelated to their current projects. This was how the post it note was developed.
Here's the thing.. at least in my field, you need to be there in person to communicate with your team, and anything worth accomplishing is most effectively accomplished through teams or groups, not through individuals. so unless the job can be done completely individually, most jobs will require you to show up when others do.
Also, not everything that's interesting to work on is necessarily worth working on. the people paying you money expect to see a return on their investment. that goes for academia too. in that regard, you will never have true autonomy to work on what you want, and expect to be compensated for it. 

I interpret 9-5 as a steady work schedule (it could also be 9/80, or 4/10, or some kind of 40 hours/week give or take) where you show up for a period of time, work, and go home to enjoy your free time (which i likey much), while in grad school that number is definitely north of 40h/wk (with much higher standard deviation, which I guess is what is referred to as "freedom"), and that salary is waaayyy south. that said, having autonomy in the workplace (which I agree is a huge perk of grad school) and having a 9-5 aren't mutually exclusive. some of the most successful companies with some of the happiest employees have 9-5 schedules, and part of their strategy is to allow some kind of freedom for their employees to do whatever they want work related during some of their work schedule. 3M is a great example in that they allocated 10-20% of their employees' schedule to think about ideas that are completely unrelated to their current projects. This was how the post it note was developed.
Here's the thing.. at least in my field, you need to be there in person to communicate with your team, and anything worth accomplishing is most effectively accomplished through teams or groups, not through individuals. so unless the job can be done completely individually, most jobs will require you to show up when others do.
Also, not everything that's interesting to work on is necessarily worth working on. the people paying you money expect to see a return on their investment. that goes for academia too. in that regard, you will never have true autonomy to work on what you want, and expect to be compensated for it. 

people in general are basics. they go to work in a job they hate, buy things they don't need, in order to afford nice things, so that they can impress people they don't like, and post that shit on social media to make their lives seem awesome. no wonder so many of them are on antidepressants. this is as much true for people in academia as anywhere else. a lot of people stumble into a phd without a real incentive to really be there. I kid you not some of them want to spend 5 years of their lives and opportunity cost from a real job just to have a "PhD" on their resume. interesting people are everywhere though. you just have to look harder. 

these type of stuff are highly dependent upon the program, group, field of study, etc. but..
1. relatively little politics and few red tape: when I worked in industry, it was absurd the amount of work we had to go through to justify simple company expenditures. In academia, I sometimes have to ask for my adviser's approval, and it's done. If I need to make modifications to one of the instruments I'm using, I don't have to setup a meeting and consult with 5 different safety, maintenance, operation managers approvals and take a fucking week to get it done. I can do it right now because I'm a level headed individual who understand the risks of the chemicals that I'm working with better than anyone else who can help me. Having that freedom is awesome, and something that only really happens in academia
2. being around like minded people. I used to work around conservative, close minded people in east texas, where new ideas are rejected because it's easy to do so, and thinking about new ideas is apparently too much mental gymnastics for them to handle. When I ask people why we're doing things a certain way, it pisses me off on the inside to hear "because that's the way it's always been done." It's like they're just showing up for a paycheck and couldn't care less about what their work. I don't want to be in that environment. Part of what excites me about research is I get to do new things. And if it works, I'm the man.
Those are two main things that I enjoy.
 
I'd like to say flexible hours too, but right now, I'm spread pretty thin.. I also really like the city I live in, but that won't be true for a lot of other grad schools, which might be located in the middle of nowhere.

oh hell yea

Did one of those Sunday night. All-nighters for homework are the most discouraging experiences for me, but I think most people will resort to it at some point. I'm sorry

all i saw was "busty"
 

yea, leggings are probably bad idea. if you want guys like me to take you seriously, definitely dress conservatively. otherwise, we'll be like "oh hi there.. how ar- beeewwwwbs"

we all have a type. I figured out I interact better with athletes, outdoors people, and I like to talk/learn about practical social issues. I also learned that I don't like interacting with the party hard balls to the wall people, who talk and complain about random shit all the time, not to say they're bad, but it's just not the type of environment that I thrive in. you have a type too. from what I've gathered, you're not being very selective on who you want to be your friend. you're just kind of spilling seeds everywhere, hoping something would grow. I think you should think about who you are, and the types of people you want to hang out with. it's like a lot of things in life, if it's too easy to get, nobody will want it. In my department, there are only a few people that I feel like I can be real with. I'm not exactly a socialite who's a hub of connections, but I'm perfectly ok with having a few people that I can really rely on. that's just my take on this.

we all have a type. I figured out I interact better with athletes, outdoors people, and I like to talk/learn about practical social issues. I also learned that I don't like interacting with the party hard balls to the wall people, who talk and complain about random shit all the time, not to say they're bad, but it's just not the type of environment that I thrive in. you have a type too. from what I've gathered, you're not being very selective on who you want to be your friend. you're just kind of spilling seeds everywhere, hoping something would grow. I think you should think about who you are, and the types of people you want to hang out with. it's like a lot of things in life, if it's too easy to get, nobody will want it. In my department, there are only a few people that I feel like I can be real with. I'm not exactly a socialite who's a hub of connections, but I'm perfectly ok with having a few people that I can really rely on. that's just my take on this.

yea, leggings are probably bad idea. if you want guys like me to take you seriously, definitely dress conservatively. otherwise, we'll be like "oh hi there.. how ar- beeewwwwbs"

all i saw was "busty"
 

I'm that far yet, but if thousandhardships makes a valid point in worrying about whether you will get a good recommendation from your current research adviser. And it sounds like you feel victimized by the department, and your head is not in the right place to be productive with them any longer. Best course of action is to leave that environment. don't fight it. it might be a good idea to take some long weekends or sick days to meet/skype with potential research advisers from other schools and get some face time, to show commitment, and to have honest, unfiltered conversations (do try to keep them positive though). This is what I did when I was SOL, and would not be where I am had I not done so. If they like you, they can pull strings to get you in. 

I'm that far yet, but if thousandhardships makes a valid point in worrying about whether you will get a good recommendation from your current research adviser. And it sounds like you feel victimized by the department, and your head is not in the right place to be productive with them any longer. Best course of action is to leave that environment. don't fight it. it might be a good idea to take some long weekends or sick days to meet/skype with potential research advisers from other schools and get some face time, to show commitment, and to have honest, unfiltered conversations (do try to keep them positive though). This is what I did when I was SOL, and would not be where I am had I not done so. If they like you, they can pull strings to get you in.