unhappy

I will admit that for what I want to do UCSD is probably the best school in the country-- imaging for neuroscience There is a certain faculty member who left Stanford and helped found Instagram, James Hollan (infographic expert) and many many many notable people in the neuroscience/radiology fields San Diego is the neurotech capital of the country which was recognized by the President and governor (Cal BRAIN initiave), but even after all this, it still doesn't have much clout and I'm sorry but that really matters to me.

In undergrad, I did mediocre....I had very strong semesters and other not so strong. I was undergoing depression. Now I'm in a PhD program at UCSD and quite frankly I'm embarrassed. I really did not want to start school again after undergrad...I honestly need a break. I graduated from an Ivy League and am deep in debt. I am embarrassed to be attending UCSD quite frankly. UCSD ranks number 15 or so in my field ...name and prestige really matters. And I went to an Ivy League school that people don't recognize the name of (hint: it's been consistently ranked 4th in US news after Yale) on the west coast. It annoys me because people know about Stanford but my school was ranked just as high, if not better, yet people on the west coast are unfamiliar with it. My undergrad grades weren't terrible, however, I am going to get straight As in graduate school and quit after I get my masters...it should only take me one year and a quarter. After that I want to go to an Ivy, MIT, Stanford or Berkeley. I honestly won't be happy unless I graduate from a top school. People's ignorance about Columbia annoys me...it's an Ivy League school for Christ's sake. But I remember someone on the west coast saying, "Columbia's the most expensive school? I don't get it..it's not Harvard or anything." I was just too dumbfounded to say anything. And my sibling goes to Harvard and everyone knows about Harvard and it's annoying when I see the reaction when I say my sibling goes to Harvard and people have no reaction about Columbia because they don't realize it's one of the top schools in the country. I love NYC and I wouldn't trade my years there for anything in the world but I'm tired of not being good enough, I know I'm capable.