PsychedOutHopeful

Thanks guys. Just kind of going through ideas and figured I’d get honest answers here, ha.

I appreciate your thoughtful answer. This is actually my third cycle so I’m pretty familiar and am working at a lab related to my area of interest. And I have had several acceptances in the past, just not to my top choices and have made conscious decisions to reject offers. And being a military spouse means I am actually v aware of timing and PCS-ing, but it’s great you’re aware of the challenges that military families face in creating and maintaining a career. In regards to the rest, I appreciate your perspective, and you have a lot of valid points for sure. And actually the literature shows a large variation in PTSD recovery time. Especially for point trauma. But I’ll keep all that in mind! Thanks!

*TRIGGER WARNING- this is about trauma including suicide* It's intense. Don't read it if that will be upsetting for you. Hi guys. I am considering my persona statement/ essay. The work I want to do is increasing provider training/ patient accessibility to evidence based practices for trauma/ PTSD. Specifically focused on the military, but really everyone. And this is what I've wanted to do for years/ ever. I'm also interested in the meaning people make from trauma and how some people thrive while others struggle for years. A month ago, I was driving on the highway late at night with my family in the car (they were fortunately asleep) and a man ran into the highway from a rest stop and literally jumped in front of my car, committing suicide. Unfortunately, there was nothing I could have done. I was going 65 mph (the speed limit), it was raining, and very dark. Despite braking and swerving, I was unable to do anything to save this man's life. He wanted to die, and made sure that would be the outcome. Fortunately, I was able to save my family (my young child was in the car), and I am the only one in my family who actually witnessed it. I developed Acute Stress and subsequently, as I've passed the one month mark, PTSD. I have a wonderful trauma therapist and have made a lot of progress. The meaning I have made from this had truly reinforced my desire to do the work that I described above. I was lucky. Lucky to live, and lucky to find a trauma specialist who is able to provide me with evidence based therapy. But not everyone is so lucky. I am at the point where I can talk about it without becoming overly emotional, and imagine I will be more so by interview time. I was not a religious person, but truly feel that it is my calling or purpose to do this work. To help other people survive their traumas, and to increase research around trauma related EBP, and increase provider training. I am a social worker who previously worked inpatient psychiatry and in and emergency department... with trauma and helping people to NOT kill themselves (or others). I'm also a military spouse who understands deployment stress and trauma stemming from service on many levels. And now I'm a trauma survivor (hopefully, thriver) who in my core understands trauma and the value of EBP. What I'm wondering is if you guys think I can share any of that info in my essay. It's a bit outside my comfort zone. I'm not a general oversharer. But I guess there's a part of me that is like this crazy thing happened. It has shaken me to my core, yes, but also underscored and strengthened my desire to do this research in hopes of making a difference for even one trauma survivor. I feel that in my soul. I had actually been accepted to a PsyD program for Fall 2020, and I was all set to go... despite some reservations about my ability to do the research I wanted. But after this, I feel like I NEED to do reapply to PhD programs, and become a researcher. So what do you guys think? Is there a way to discuss this without being too overshare-y? Too intense? Please be honest. Thanks!

I haven’t seen any posts about civilian acceptances. I think it’s totally fine to reach out at this point- I’m not going to be able to call today, but I’m in the same boat as you! Please let me know if they give you any insight! I’ve seen a lot of people who reach out to programs a week after interviews.

SAME SAME SAME

I have no helpful advice, but YOU ARE SUCH A ROCKSTAR ❤️❤️ Doing the work to get into grad school is hard. Doing the work with kids is v hard. Doing the work as a single parent is beyond impressive. Congrats x a million.

For the posters about getting accepted to USUHS mil track— CONGRATS!!!!!! So excited for you!!! Did they happen to give any insight into civilian notifications? Dying over here.

Congrats!! That’s good to know

Oops, exceeded my reaction quota for the day!! But thanks to both of you. It is such a surreal experience. Also how bizarre are interviews? you’re put in a high stress environment with multiple people who are applying for the same spot... but you might like them and be like oh wow they have worked so hard too, but you’re also like PICK ME, but also trying to be so laid back and polite and low key FREAKING OUT (or is that just me ?). The whole thing is just weird and exhausting on so many levels.

Ha that’s perfect. I hope you get some good news soon!!!!

I get this completely. Like because I truly feel like I have done all I can, and worked and tried as hard as possible, I will be that much more crushed if stuff doesn’t pan out.

That’s kind of what I’m trying to prep for mentally. Like focusing on odds against me so I’m not completely crushed. But oh my gosh this is insane. If I wake up at night, I’m like TODAY COULD BE THE DAY ? oof.

I am so stressed waiting to hear back from my interview at my top choice. I LOVED it and feel like it went really well, but also know there were multiple applicants from labs at the school. I keep playing everything out in my head and I don’t think I could refresh my email more frequently! How have you guys coped with the interim? What’s been helpful for you all? Or am I just doomed to full on anxiety until I hear back?

I love you. Haha congrats ❤️❤️❤️ That’s great ?

Ah thanks, I’m trying to think about it like that. But I am reading into EVERYTHING and maybe day of is a good thing! Bc then you don’t have extra time to read into things like me ? good luck!