EricaMarie

"Well this just means you can get a real job and become a productive member of society." <------my parents, I'm sure.

"Well this just means you can get a real job and become a productive member of society." <------my parents, I'm sure.

Hi Folks,

Congrats to y'all who have been accepted, and commiserations to y'all who are still waiting for one, just one acceptance. That being said, please please please, be respectful that there are some really deserving scholars who are desperate for one admission and are still waiting whilst others have one or more options to chose from. Please do not be mad at this post, I am merely trying to protect friends and colleagues who are feeling raw.

Kind regards,
The Rest

Reading the result board posts (specifically for English) has officially become serial lobotomy. Does anyone think the next six years of any person's life should be reduced to an apostrophe? Is pernicious (not to mention banal) wit an appropriate response to the time, psychic energy, and financial expense required of the application process? It's troubling that PhD applicants can find no better use of their intellect than to impugn themselves, their prospective institutions, future careers, and presumed depth of understanding with so much bland brain matter. Sadly, no amount of good grammar can season it to taste.

This is a stressful time. Please remember, the eyes of more futures than your own look over those posts with alternating hope and pause. Own acceptance, rejection, and the creamy anxiety in between with a little class.

I hope you don't mind, but this made me LOL for the first time in days, so I'm gonna steal it for my signature.

This is slightly off-topic, I know, but for the sake of not sounding ignorant should the topic arise again--

What exactly is queer history?

"Well this just means you can get a real job and become a productive member of society." <------my parents, I'm sure.

"Well this just means you can get a real job and become a productive member of society." <------my parents, I'm sure.

"Just one school with funding, just one school with funding." That's been my mantra for the past two months. Now that we're probably going to be hearing back relatively soon from a number of schools, I'm getting so anxious it's not even funny.

I'd like it to begin for me now, please!!!

Unfortunately, you said it in a snarky tone of voice. StrangeLight didn't. It's all well and good that you're a third time applicant--really, I hope you get in somewhere--but for those of us who haven't done this before, it's kind of second nature to worry. It just is. And you telling us "i told you so" just kind of makes you come off as a b**ch. Just saying.

On a similar point, some of us don't have people in our lives that we can talk to about our neuroses, so we come here instead. This is where I can say I go to let off some steam and find others who understand exactly what I'm going through. Telling us "newbies" to just log off is to not take into account the possibility that we need to be here, if for no other reason than solidarity.

Thank you old timers for your advice, but telling us "I told you so" isn't helping.

Unfortunately, you said it in a snarky tone of voice. StrangeLight didn't. It's all well and good that you're a third time applicant--really, I hope you get in somewhere--but for those of us who haven't done this before, it's kind of second nature to worry. It just is. And you telling us "i told you so" just kind of makes you come off as a b**ch. Just saying.

On a similar point, some of us don't have people in our lives that we can talk to about our neuroses, so we come here instead. This is where I can say I go to let off some steam and find others who understand exactly what I'm going through. Telling us "newbies" to just log off is to not take into account the possibility that we need to be here, if for no other reason than solidarity.

Thank you old timers for your advice, but telling us "I told you so" isn't helping.

I, like other who read signatures, am aware that tickle has gotten into a masters program. While I may not have been clear about it, my comment was more in hopes that she gets into a Ph.D. program. I was unclear, which I'll apologize for.


Not everyone appreciates the use of foul language. I use it like a sailor because, hey, that's how I grew up. However, I know that some people do not appreciate it. However if you'd prefer that I say that tickle was being a solid bitch in another thread about this, then fine. I'll say that. She was being a bitch about it. And if you really want to play this game, go fuck yourself. Better?


And where are those people going to go when they get rejected? Here, for a little bit of sympathy. I've seen that so far. I've also seen that this is where people go to hang out to help forget about the waiting. And honestly? If they're here, it's less time they spend refreshing their emails. I also highly doubt that those of us applying this cycle are assuming that, just because we don't get a rejection email within a few days of one email, doesn't mean we won't be rejected. We're not stupid. We simply have hope.


I never said it wasn't worth taking. Honestly, I was all for taking your original advice of logging off. I never said it was bad advice. I said tickle was being a bitch about giving that advice. Which, in turn, makes us less likely to listen to her. Because she's being snarky, which isn't helping. And the people who have lived this experience do have a lot of good advice, but they aren't me, are they? They have no idea what my life is like, so they shouldn't judge me for being here as often as I am. It's one thing to say "hey, relax, you'll get the emails when you get them. if you hang out here for three months, you'll be unproductive." That's giving us a reason to log off--find something more productive to do to forget about the waiting, and we can't control when or if we get stuff. It's quite another to say "Nobody listened when I said to relax...Nobody listens to me at all and I'm a third time applicant." Bitch bitch bitch, whine whine whine. "Oh nobody listens to me!!" pout pout pout. Seriously? It makes her sound like a whineass. No wonder nobody listens to her.

I'm not saying she's not intelligent, and I'm not saying that she doesn't have solid points. But she has a really shitty way of getting those points across.


Like I said, I never said she was stupid. Nor did I tell anyone not to listen to her. All I said was that her advice comes across as snarky, and doesn't help anybody, least of all herself if she wants to be heard.


You're damn right I call her a bitch for saying "I told you so." Nobody likes a know-it-all, and most people really despise people who say "I told you so." We don't need to be told "I told you so." Like I said, it doesn't help anybody, and it makes her come across as a know-it-all, pompous, self-righteous bitch.


Like I said originally, your advice was good. It came off as hard, but kind. You didn't come across as a dick trying to make the rest of us feel like shit for wanting a place to talk. You didn't say "well nobody listens to me, so I told you so." I'm not advocating a lack of advice. I'm advocating advice that isn't snarky or bitchy in tone.

You wanna help us? Then help us. Tell us it's a good idea to get off the computer and go outside. Tell us it'd be better for our mental health if we block this website, because otherwise we're all going to become neurotic (although if we all did that, there'd be no point to some of the subforums here). Tell us to go read a book for fun, or walk the dog (if we have one, as I do). Tell us that, at this point, there is nothing we can do but wait, and obsessing about it won't make decisions get to us any faster.

Tell us that, if we must be here, avoid the threads that force us to compare ourselves so that we feel inadequate.

But if you want to help? Don't tell us "I told you so."

I, like other who read signatures, am aware that tickle has gotten into a masters program. While I may not have been clear about it, my comment was more in hopes that she gets into a Ph.D. program. I was unclear, which I'll apologize for.


Not everyone appreciates the use of foul language. I use it like a sailor because, hey, that's how I grew up. However, I know that some people do not appreciate it. However if you'd prefer that I say that tickle was being a solid bitch in another thread about this, then fine. I'll say that. She was being a bitch about it. And if you really want to play this game, go fuck yourself. Better?


And where are those people going to go when they get rejected? Here, for a little bit of sympathy. I've seen that so far. I've also seen that this is where people go to hang out to help forget about the waiting. And honestly? If they're here, it's less time they spend refreshing their emails. I also highly doubt that those of us applying this cycle are assuming that, just because we don't get a rejection email within a few days of one email, doesn't mean we won't be rejected. We're not stupid. We simply have hope.


I never said it wasn't worth taking. Honestly, I was all for taking your original advice of logging off. I never said it was bad advice. I said tickle was being a bitch about giving that advice. Which, in turn, makes us less likely to listen to her. Because she's being snarky, which isn't helping. And the people who have lived this experience do have a lot of good advice, but they aren't me, are they? They have no idea what my life is like, so they shouldn't judge me for being here as often as I am. It's one thing to say "hey, relax, you'll get the emails when you get them. if you hang out here for three months, you'll be unproductive." That's giving us a reason to log off--find something more productive to do to forget about the waiting, and we can't control when or if we get stuff. It's quite another to say "Nobody listened when I said to relax...Nobody listens to me at all and I'm a third time applicant." Bitch bitch bitch, whine whine whine. "Oh nobody listens to me!!" pout pout pout. Seriously? It makes her sound like a whineass. No wonder nobody listens to her.

I'm not saying she's not intelligent, and I'm not saying that she doesn't have solid points. But she has a really shitty way of getting those points across.


Like I said, I never said she was stupid. Nor did I tell anyone not to listen to her. All I said was that her advice comes across as snarky, and doesn't help anybody, least of all herself if she wants to be heard.


You're damn right I call her a bitch for saying "I told you so." Nobody likes a know-it-all, and most people really despise people who say "I told you so." We don't need to be told "I told you so." Like I said, it doesn't help anybody, and it makes her come across as a know-it-all, pompous, self-righteous bitch.


Like I said originally, your advice was good. It came off as hard, but kind. You didn't come across as a dick trying to make the rest of us feel like shit for wanting a place to talk. You didn't say "well nobody listens to me, so I told you so." I'm not advocating a lack of advice. I'm advocating advice that isn't snarky or bitchy in tone.

You wanna help us? Then help us. Tell us it's a good idea to get off the computer and go outside. Tell us it'd be better for our mental health if we block this website, because otherwise we're all going to become neurotic (although if we all did that, there'd be no point to some of the subforums here). Tell us to go read a book for fun, or walk the dog (if we have one, as I do). Tell us that, at this point, there is nothing we can do but wait, and obsessing about it won't make decisions get to us any faster.

Tell us that, if we must be here, avoid the threads that force us to compare ourselves so that we feel inadequate.

But if you want to help? Don't tell us "I told you so."

Unfortunately, you said it in a snarky tone of voice. StrangeLight didn't. It's all well and good that you're a third time applicant--really, I hope you get in somewhere--but for those of us who haven't done this before, it's kind of second nature to worry. It just is. And you telling us "i told you so" just kind of makes you come off as a b**ch. Just saying.

On a similar point, some of us don't have people in our lives that we can talk to about our neuroses, so we come here instead. This is where I can say I go to let off some steam and find others who understand exactly what I'm going through. Telling us "newbies" to just log off is to not take into account the possibility that we need to be here, if for no other reason than solidarity.

Thank you old timers for your advice, but telling us "I told you so" isn't helping.

Unfortunately, you said it in a snarky tone of voice. StrangeLight didn't. It's all well and good that you're a third time applicant--really, I hope you get in somewhere--but for those of us who haven't done this before, it's kind of second nature to worry. It just is. And you telling us "i told you so" just kind of makes you come off as a b**ch. Just saying.

On a similar point, some of us don't have people in our lives that we can talk to about our neuroses, so we come here instead. This is where I can say I go to let off some steam and find others who understand exactly what I'm going through. Telling us "newbies" to just log off is to not take into account the possibility that we need to be here, if for no other reason than solidarity.

Thank you old timers for your advice, but telling us "I told you so" isn't helping.

Quite. I can only hope it's good news. My mantra has been "just one acceptance with funding." I applied to 8 schools--that's not asking too much, is it?

Right this second, I refuse to have a Plan B. For me, having a Plan B means I'm planning to fail at Plan A, and if I'm already thinking I'm going to fail, why would I bother trying?

That view may change in the next span of time, but as it stands now, its Plan A or bust.

Right this second, I refuse to have a Plan B. For me, having a Plan B means I'm planning to fail at Plan A, and if I'm already thinking I'm going to fail, why would I bother trying?

That view may change in the next span of time, but as it stands now, its Plan A or bust.

Right this second, I refuse to have a Plan B. For me, having a Plan B means I'm planning to fail at Plan A, and if I'm already thinking I'm going to fail, why would I bother trying?

That view may change in the next span of time, but as it stands now, its Plan A or bust.

Mine is really simple. It's my name.

My avatar is Stitch banging his head against a wall, because that's what I've been doing since mid-November.

Right this second, I refuse to have a Plan B. For me, having a Plan B means I'm planning to fail at Plan A, and if I'm already thinking I'm going to fail, why would I bother trying?

That view may change in the next span of time, but as it stands now, its Plan A or bust.

I totally disagree with you, LadyL. you treat your acceptance as property, as if its something you own that you can do whatever you'd like with. the reality is that, by sitting on an offer that you know you will reject, you are making life worse for a number of people on the waitlist. so, sure, it's your "right" not to inform the school of your decision just like its my "right" not to be kind to strangers, not to donate to charity, or to throw food and goods away instead of donating them, etc.

the note you received is definitely a little terse, but i think you should consider the positions of others (the department, students on the waitlist) on not just your own fancy in this situation.

I've decided to start working out again. If nothing else, bitching about how much I hate it will make the time go faster....I hope....and make it so that my winter depression doesn't overtake me, especially during this waiting period....

This sucks.

I don't want to scare anybody here, but Columbia's status form states that my application is complete and at the department. I submitted my application on December 13th though, so I don't know if that has anything to do with the fact that the department has my application.



And I tend to agree with gradwoes. Honestly, this is a thread about status updates. We are all very aware that, since many applications were due on December 15th, the schools would have a backlog around the holidays, especially since most places have been on vacation. There's no need to be snarky about something that we are all worried about, and to be honest, it's kind of rude that you would say such a thing when we are all concerned about whether we are going to get into a program or not.

We are allowed to worry. It's not nice to be rude about it.

I don't want to scare anybody here, but Columbia's status form states that my application is complete and at the department. I submitted my application on December 13th though, so I don't know if that has anything to do with the fact that the department has my application.



And I tend to agree with gradwoes. Honestly, this is a thread about status updates. We are all very aware that, since many applications were due on December 15th, the schools would have a backlog around the holidays, especially since most places have been on vacation. There's no need to be snarky about something that we are all worried about, and to be honest, it's kind of rude that you would say such a thing when we are all concerned about whether we are going to get into a program or not.

We are allowed to worry. It's not nice to be rude about it.