ANDS!

Most campus's list stipends as being immune from the scourge of FICA. Hell some aren't taxable as personal income either (campus fellowships?).

This no more violates grade confidentiality than posting summary statistics about a classes performance on an exam. As for the seeming uneven grading - is this a quantitative course where a "right" answer is right no matter how you sell it? Because if not, unless your answer is word for word the same as these others theres really no way for you to say "Oh well we should get the exact same grade." I think the advice you've gotten is solid. Your last paragraph threatening the school's name over the behavior of ONE instructor (no I dont count the director in this whose job it is is to manage situations like this) shows your maturity level (or lack thereof). If you feel personally or professionally theatened by your directors comments after the resignation of your instructor, take it up with him or the dean of the college; however, from your comments in this thread he has reason to be wary of overzealous students flying off half-cocked because they believe they have been unjustly slighted.

I think what are you are describing in terms of Chicago is emotional fit. Academic fit is all well and good, but overall fit encompasses much more, and if you didn't "feel" it during your preview week, which I assume included pow-wowing or being introduced to a good number of the faculty, then that is certainly a red flag that should go up. Personally, I would still pick Chicago. Obviously CMU is also crazy well regarded, but Chicagos stock when it comes to their Stats program can not be sneezed at - it is simply one of the places you go if you are wanting a stats PhD. Plus, again, it's Chicago - I don't know if your long term goals are academic, but I should think you'd have a much easier time finding post grad (hell even near final grad) employment/research opportunities in Chitown than in Pittsburgh.

Now this is a situation that would merit a more in depth explanation of why you've decided to travel elsewhere. The person you've spoken with has obviously invested more than the average amount of time in getting to know you and your suitability for their program and working with them, and has connections to people already in your network (which isn't out of the ordinary, but if you're talking multiple connections. . .) I would pow-wow with your current advisors, or whomever is writing your letters and ask them - since they seem to know these professors personally/professionally - what might best be the approach to take with each of these professors.

There's no one at Michigan that's into Stochastic Processes? I find that hard to believe.

If the decision is in there don't use that, but somehow you want to communicate (delicately) that you are considering other offers; asking about a decision date is a nice segue into doing that.

I would double up on classes; ie - still take the course as a refresher for the prelims, but double up on what you would normally take. That's what I intend on doing first two semesters - I've already taken a course seq. at undergraduate level, but will still take their equivalent course (and as you say instructors can vary WILDLY in how they teach the same material) but will be taking other graduate courses since the burden is reduced significantly. However, this will have been like no-gap for me; only you know how confident you are with that 4-year gap (but I mean is it really "4-years" if you've been engaged with the material since then).

One of my peers is heading out there for Mathematics - she said she loved the place. Who wouldn't - Rocky Mountains.

Then yes you absolutely need to tread carefully. Make mention that you have actually been in contact with the First Instructor as a potential advisor, and perhaps inquire if the two have collaborated before; and if so on what. You can even make mention of what a coincidence it is, to take a bit of the "edge" off. I would also ask how long you have to make a decision so that the Second Instructor knows absolutely you are reviewing OTHER options. Make sure you are controlling the conversation so that you aren't backed into a corner.

Wouldn't be unheard of. Especially if the course material isn't. . .too rigorous. What is HCI? Do you not want to take courses from advanced graduate students? I mean its unlikely that they are going to be teaching these courses from their own prepared notes and are probably working off a template.

Wording isn't clear here; did this Second Instructor make mention of the First Instructor?

Wow. Eff that noise. I have a peer who had to deal with the same (during her undergrad). She is still living with him, but she rents a small room as a "study" far away from the home life. IF you like the program, perhaps look into that until you are able to severe ties (she sometimes sleeps there). . . Although I would just take the year off as suggested and apply to a different program; if you've put too much work into the MA - just stick around for another year; it'll be torture, but you'll be better positioned when its time to bolt.

How long has the break been between MA and entering PhD?

Say what?! Sometimes undergraduate courses are the only way to get certain elective requirements. Obviously there will be a cap on how many you can take that qualify, but I can not see a situation where an advisor would frown on such an action especially if it is needed to make the student successful in future graduate work.

Obviously there are going to be cases where the Kobe Bryants (eww) of the applicant world are being sought after and programs are willing to amend graduate packages to secure their attendance. But Sigaba makes a good point that while you have secured a victory in the short term, in the long term that faculty - even if they are totally wanting you there - will still eye you as "that guy who held out for more cash. . .even with an already generous offer" . I'm glad that there are some programs like the above that stick to their guns and say "No this is what our students get - take it or leave it"; especially if the program is already competitive in and of itself.

Perhaps. I am going to go out on a limb here though and suggest that that's most likely NOT happening here. I mean, how socially broken would you have to be to specifically search out that site, and then craft an anonymous profile with ok statistics. You'd have to be, like a Super Villain or something.

The only way one burns bridges with the customary "Thank you for the opportunity but I've decided to go elsewhere. . ." email is if the person you are responding to is pretty petty in the first place. If an applicant had more of a connection that warranted just a "teensy bit extra" in the email, by all means have it; however (at least from the mouths of faculty I've spoken with), applicants run the risk of saying the wrong thing or simply expounding on things they don't need to.

Agreed. Thankfully that's not what I said. . .at all.

LMAO. Summers I rock sweatpants and crappy t-shirts. I mean these aren't fashion runways; so long as you aren't smelling odious and with crazy stains loungewear is fine.

I would pick Chicago. The department is quite large so I would say you would be hard pressed to NOT find an advisor for your particular research interests once you reach that point. From a quick peek-a-boo to UChi's website, there are several faculty interested in Machine Learning, so I don't think you would be left out of the cold. Plus, cmon. . .Chicago! Realistically, your dilemma is "Am I going to be boned come research time. . ."; I would think no. I assume you have until April 15th - shoot an email to the chair and just do a bit of digging: "Thank you for the interview session, however I was hoping you could point me in the direction of any faculty who have X-interest and the current work they are doing with this topic."

Yale. Definitely a tough call, especially since much of Yale's cachet comes from its name (although a top 30 program is nothing to sneeze at). However, that is one crazy small department; you are going to be with these people for the next couple of years - I don't doubt the Bulldogs have a social life, but much easier with a cohort the size that Michigan has. So of course my recommendation is Michigan.

There is no negative tone. It is simply me not shining you on; you asked for opinions, I gave you one which you reject out of hand which lead me to conclude you don't actually want opinions just validation for a decision you have already made. Nature of the beast. I amended my recommendation to be more in line what you were seeking. . .did you not see?

Second not bringing attention to it. If somehow he remembers you simply tell the truth: you got caught up in personal bidness.

Exactly. Perhaps people want to over complicate things because it is a big step in their life, and each action demands some grand gesture. Unless you're an exceptional candidate and the department went out of their way to recruit you (read: did they do anything they didn't do, or wont do again, to another candidate) a simple email suffices. But hey I'm sure someone will come along and tell the OP what they want to hear: personalized hand written cards (perhaps scented) expressing deepest regrets and the hope that this doesn't completely shatter their graduate program.

The clothes you'd normally wear. It's not an interview.