TakeruK

I made a spreadsheet to directly compare a few factors. Some of it was financial -- I listed the stipend, subtracted off necessary costs that change on location (rent, health insurance, copays) so that I would be able to compare the stipends directly (I figured small differences in e.g. cost of food is not going to be a game changer). I considered how much I liked the courseload/degree format (how many exams? orals?) and time to degree. I also considered research but at this point (down to 3 choices), the research everywhere was good enough that the real deciding factor was how happy I would be at each place. I don't like numerical scores because you can just fudge the weighting factors to get the result you want. On the other hand, if you find yourself fudging the weighting factors to get a certain result, maybe you have already made a choice!

There's no reason not to share -- you can easily replace "elsewhere" in my example with "at University X." I guess I just chose the faster option to type when writing the example

I am not sure if it would apply to MS programs the same way -- I don't have experience to help you, sorry Subject line could be...."Decision timeline inquiry" or something like that? I wouldn't worry about the subject line too much.

If you don't want to appear as if you are leveraging them, then just email to say that you got accepted at XYZ (don't mention the financial offer) and that XYZ wants you to respond in 2 weeks. Then tell them that you will try to ask XYZ for an extension and would like to know what date their school would make decisions by, so that you can ask for an appropriate amount of time. That way, you will avoid sounding like you are trying to leverage them and/or rush them.

In Canada, we don't have the April 15 deadline thing (except for some of the big schools that line up with the US), so this happens a lot. But first, I need to ask/clarify, is this $88k over the entire degree, or $88k/year? If it's per year, then how much is tuition?? Most schools/programs in Canada have tuition in the $5000-$7000 per year range. (Extra note for non-Canadians: typically, Canadian grad school offers don't come with tuition waivers because they generally pay us the money as employment income and then we pay for tuition afterwards). When I applied to MSc programs, I got accepted into one school in mid-January and they gave me 4 weeks, until Feb 15, to decide. However, another school's application deadline was March 1! So what I did was ask the first school to extend the deadline by 3 weeks and told my other school about the dilemma. I submitted my application early and they reviewed it early, and gave me a decision prior to March 1. For your current situation, since you don't have a deadline and you don't have other offers, I think you should just let Carleton know that you are grateful for their offer and you are still waiting for other programs' decisions before you can decide and that you will get back to them. Then you just have to wait and see what the other schools say. Once the other schools give you their offers, you would want to decide which school is your favourite and then leverage the highest offer you have. But you can't do that until you have the offer!! And don't forget that you can still apply for SSHRC in your first two years of your PhD, so even if you didn't get it this time, there's another chance.

In my field, in both Canada and the US, it's common for the department to set fixed funding levels and getting extra funding usually does not mean you keep all of the extra money. For example, at one Canadian school, the three funding levels for MSc programs are: $24k/year (no scholarship), $27k/year (Ontario scholarship), $32k/year (national scholarship). So, the NSERC CGS-M is something like $18k/year, but they will reduce the in-school funding so that your total funding comes out to $32k/year. This is common practice and I believe totally fine because the in-school funding can often be an award that has a needs-based condition. One US example is that the funding is set at $30k/year (+ tuition) no matter what. I have a NSERC PGS-D that is $21k/year CAD so the school just pays for my tuition and the difference between my award and the set funding level. Some students with really really big awards that pay both tuition and stipend can keep the extra pay, however, the tuition is like $40k/year so this is rare. And, wannabe02 is right that you should strategize how/when you apply for SSHRC or NSERC funding. Maybe SSHRC is a little different, but for NSERC, I would recommend that you apply every single year you can (starting in your final year of undergrad). You will find out about your award in April and have until May to decide to accept it. By then, you would know which US school you are attending and you can have their policy on your award in writing. If it turns out that you are better off taking the SSHRC/NSERC in years 2-4 instead of 1-3 (for whatever reason) then decline the SSHRC/NSERC award and reapply (or ask for a deferral). Finally, having Canadian based income is a good thing because as non-residents of America, we do not pay American federal taxes on Canadian income. I do pay California state tax on foreign income though, but that's much less. So, having two-thirds of my income non-taxable is a nice plus.

In Physics, usually this means you are admitted or they plan to admit you very shortly. Some schools do not notify you of acceptance before the visit because: 1. They might not have figured out funding yet but they want to book your flights and set up the visit dates without waiting to figure that out, or, 2. They just want to meet you and vet you (i.e. make sure you are actually a good fit and not a terrible person). So this is a great news. In Physics programs, this visit is more about them convincing you to join them, not really a competitive interview stage. I would say that the usual case is that you have to do something really terrible to not get accepted. But of course, you can't assume anything until you get official notice. It would be very wise to act professional and make sure you represent your best self! Even if you are basically sure to get in, you want your future colleagues' first impression of you to be your best self

I think asking to pay for your own hotel room is a perfectly reasonable request. It's okay to not be comfortable sharing a room with a stranger. I was able to avoid this situation at all of my school visits without any out of pocket expenses (at some schools, I asked to be reimbursed for gas+hotel room instead of a flight+hotel [less money], at others, I stayed in a room at another student's home or I stayed at a friend's place [friend was already student in the same program]) I have no problem with sharing rooms in general (I do this all the time at conferences to save grant money even though my advisor would be fine with me having my own room), but only if I get to pick my roommate. In fact, I like sharing rooms with a friend (especially one from another school) at conferences/meetings because usually one of us will know a group of people going out that night and you'll have something to do. However, for a prospective student visit, at least in the programs I went to, the days are long, often going from 8am to late (including the social events) so you just use the room for sleeping. And you would already have spent all day with your roommate and other students, so there's not much left to gain from the roommate interaction. And, personally, I would be so worn out of socializing and talking to people that I would really just like a quiet room to myself at the end of the night, instead of having to deal with sharing a small space with a stranger and worrying about morning schedules etc. But maybe that's just me!!

Agree with rising_star times infinity on this!!

I think this statement expresses the intent of my original post better than the way I wrote it. Also, sorry that my original post was not very practical for your programs!

My wife was very involved with the decision from start to end. We talked about going on to a PhD together and decided that's the best path forwards for both of us, as a family, and that all the sacrifices we will be making will be worth it for us. (Note: In Canada, it's typical to do a 2 year fully funded Masters after your bachelors and the real "commitment" to grad school/academia happens when you decide to do a PhD--and Masters are required for PhD admission). So, from the very start, even though I would be the student, we felt that the decision was completely equal between us. So, I first made a list of schools that I thought would be good fits and my wife made a list of schools in places that she would like to live (and would have good work opportunities). We talked about each of the items on our list and the school/city only survived if we both liked it enough to give it a chance (i.e. good fit and good place to live). We ended up with 8 schools. Only one of the schools required an interview (Skype) and during the interview they asked me what factors are important to me when applying to their school/selecting a school and I was honest. I told them that this decision is only 50% mine and I am choosing places based on the program as well as how much we would enjoy living there. I mentioned both academic and personal reasons (in a geographic area we liked, a city with culture that we liked, close to family, stipend vs cost of living etc.) They seemed very happy with it (and I got in, yay!). After the schools made their decisions, we decided that I would only visit my top 3 choices. Two of them were far enough away that my wife could not take time off to visit so I visited and took lots of pictures etc. I told all the schools that we were making the decision 50/50. The schools were very helpful and they made sure to set me up to meet with other students in the same situation as me. One concern I had was whether the school would sponsor me for the J-1 international student visa so that my wife can work (the standard F-1 visa does not allow spouses to work). Two of the schools cared about this issue and had me talk to married international and American students to find out how their spouses found work etc. I also mentioned that we probably wanted to start a family near the end of grad school and they were very receptive to that as well. They set me up to meet with current graduate student parents and told me about what the school does in terms of financial and leave support. For one school, it was close enough (driving distance) that my wife and I were able to visit together. We asked if she could come along and the school was very happy to have her there. Originally they set us up to stay at another married grad student's home but we were not comfortable with that so we asked to stay in a hotel room. We basically asked what the limit on reimbursement would be (because we were not flying, they would be saving a lot of money) and we found a way to stay in a cheap hotel and pay for gas under that limit. We asked them for approval of this plan and they went with it. During the visit, the school assigned a desk for my wife to work at and also gave her suggestions on what to see in town while I talked with the professors. They included her in all of the social events and meals. In summary, maybe it's just my field, but my experience is that every encounter we had was very supportive of married graduate student and everyone understood that this was a decision we made together and that if they were trying to "recruit" me, then they need to demonstrate why their school and city were appealing to both my wife and I. I was always upfront about my priorities and asked for my wife to be included wherever possible and it worked out really well. Finally, when it was decision time, the two of us ranked the top 3 choices in order we liked them and it turned out be exactly the same order. The plan was that we would discuss the options until we had a decision we both were satisfied with but that worked out really well PS My wife (then-girlfriend) also visited Canadian grad schools with me when I was applying to MSc programs and they were equally welcoming and also paid for expenses that did not cost them any more because she was there (e.g. hotel room since they would pay for mine anyways).

When I was considering UK schools, I also found that there were not really many less-competitive awards. In fact, this is kind of true for every international student -- the only awards for non-citizens are usually the super competitive awards for the very top applicants. And there is a weird age limit too...24 or something, doesn't leave much room for non-traditional students or those who did a Masters first (as is the norm in Canada). But like the US, some UK schools have internal awards that you are automatically considered for when you apply to their program. They are still competitive in the sense that they are usually University-wide fellowships (where perhaps each department has some quota to award) so you would still need to be one of the top international students applying to their program, but at least it's one level of competition down Fulbright, Rhodes, etc.

It's possible for international students to volunteer in labs in the US but you need to be part of some kind of academic program or an exchange program. This is what I meant by "secure a position first". For example, are you in a University in your home country now and does that University have exchange programs with schools in the US? Or could you find specific research programs for international students at US schools? This will be something you will have to do a lot of research and digging to find the positions. In addition to finding programs yourself, you could try contacting some professors that might be able to take on volunteers. However, it's pretty tough to just contact professors out of the blue and expect them to take you on--you need to have some connection. Can a professor at your home university introduce you, for example? But if you do find a professor that is willing to help you, then perhaps they will know about exchange programs in their state or university that you can apply for. But hermes is right--this is going to be really hard and if your goal is grad school in the US, there are other ways to gain research experience where the visa issue isn't such an issue.

I would not recommend the plan on "accepting and then transferring". But it depends on your program. If you are in a research based PhD program, this is not a good idea at all and it will be very hard to apply to new PhD programs when you are already in a PhD program. I think you need to ask for an extension until the end of March (or whenever you think you need). If the school wants you, they will give you the extension. The school is not going to withdraw their offer simply because you asked for an extension, so if the school says no, you still have the offer. However, sometimes schools do "bully" students into accepting early and you don't really want to go to that kind of school, to be honest. Finally, if you have no other options (they will withdraw their offer if you don't accept in 2 weeks and they won't give you an extension) then one option would be to accept their offer and then rescind that acceptance later if you like the new school more. But this can really hurt you in the long run because it's not a good action to take (but I guess if you have no choice then you have no choice). But before you do this, try everything else first and let all the schools know of your situation!

Now you're starting to scare me too!! I am a meat eater (but not exclusively meat) and I am really adventurous with food. My wife is not a vegetarian but she just doesn't like the taste of red meat (she will eat some ground beef in burger or taco/burrito form, sometimes eat chicken and likes fish/seafood). Cooking is my role and our arrangement is that I rarely cook meat at home (maybe 1 or 2 times per week). We find other sources of protein and although I get slightly more "say" in meal planning since I'm doing the cooking, we definitely work together to make sure our meals are something we would both like! I satisfy my "red meat" desires when we go out or I get free food at school. Also, we save a ton of money on groceries by buying less meat, and I definitely think it's healthier to eat much less meat now that I did when I was younger. So I feel like this is a win-win arrangement that everyone is happy with. Since it sounds like you are the main cook, maybe this will work out too? As for children, we are not there yet but we both think that we won't raise our children to be pro- or anti-vegetarian. We plan to expose our children to a lot of varied food choices so that hopefully they will develop a wide palette. Then, when they are older, they can make decisions for themselves what they like. Most vegetarians I know that have only eaten as a vegetarian from childhood tell me that they cannot stomach meat and will get really sick after eating meat. Other vegetarians tell me that not eating meat limited their exposure to certain spices and flavourings traditionally used on meat dishes so that they are less adventurous/used to different foods (especially from different cultures that have more meat dishes). I don't know if this is just the people I know or if many vegetarian eaters feel this way. I talked to people who decided to be vegetarian later in life as well as those who were raised vegetarian. I grew up in a very vegetarian/vegan part of Canada where it's more common to be a 20-something vegetarian than a 20-something meat eater, so I think I did meet a variety of people, but who knows. Since my wife and I do not have any moral convictions for or against eating meat, we would want to give our children exposure to as many different foods as possible, so that they are not limited by biology (i.e. getting sick after eating meat) later on in life when they do decide what they want to eat. But if vegetarianism is a central part of one or both parents' core values, then I can understand why this approach would not be appealing. But just giving my thoughts.

I'm not in Math/Stats but the most difficult adjustment I had to make was nothing related to the discipline at all! But maybe this does not apply if you are in a course-based graduate program. For me, the hardest thing was adjusting the way I manage my time and expectations. As an undergraduate student, my main priority was my coursework -- I worked on problem sets until I felt I understood the material completely and studied for tests aiming for top grades. I'd say I probably spent 60 hours per week on coursework. However, as a graduate student, all of this changes! My main priority is now research and classes are just a necessity. I had to learn how to stop working on problem sets and stop studying when I started reaching diminishing returns. I no longer try to get every question right on homework sets or understand every bit of every lecture. Often, I know I can get 90% instead of say, 80%, if I spent another couple of hours on it, but I can also be another couple of hours closer to a paper if I worked on research instead. That is, I think the hardest adjustment to make, for me, was the ability to turn in coursework that I knew was not my very best. Fortunately, we did get a lot of support with the adjustment. The professors talked to us about their expectations and made it clear that if we didn't get a few Bs here and there, then we were trying too hard on classes. We just have to prioritize what is important to us and our future career goals, which is normally research but the occasional essential class might be worth the extra effort.

The general "play nice" rule/agreement (to use the term Eigen used in another post) between many (but not all) graduate programs is that they all agreed to give applicants the same deadline of April 15. This is also known as the "CGS Resolution". But not all programs are part of this agreement and being on the agreement does not legally require the school to do anything. There are some reasons they might want a fast answer. Perhaps they want to know if you are interested so that if you turn them down, they can offer the fellowship to someone else. Perhaps they are not part of this agreement at all. Perhaps they are "playing dirty" and trying to bully you into making a decision. It's hard to tell sometimes. But you have to make the best decision for yourself. From my point of view, you have two main options: 1. Take no risk with funding but a huge risk with fit. Accept this offer within 9 days and don't interview anywhere else. Sure, the funding will be secure but you might not find this program to be a good fit for you and/or another program might have been better for you (or give you a better offer, even). 2. Take a small risk with funding and no risk with fit. Ask for an extension until you hear back from more schools. There is a chance that this particular fellowship will go away but they might just be trying to gauge initial interest (i.e. maybe they figure all the students that chose them as #1 would accept right away). After all, you are a top choice for them if they are offering you admission and a fellowship--they would want you to come, and they know that taking away funding is a good way to drive you elsewhere. In my opinion, I would go with option #2 because fit is so important to success in grad school. I also think that most schools will realise that unless an applicant already knows they want to go to that school, they are going to ask for an extension. Also, I think asking for option #2 and seeing the school's response will tell you a bit about the school's motives (i.e. whether or not they are trying to bully you / play dirty). And if you know that they are trying to bully you, then perhaps it's not such a loss that you lose a chance to go there. To ask for an extension, I would be concise and provide a definite timeframe. For example, start with thanking them for their offer and that you appreciate the opportunity presented to you. Let them know that grad school is a big decision and commitment to you and unfortunately you will not be able to make the decision within 9 days because you want to visit their school (if you haven't yet) and/or other schools. Then ask them if they would consider allowing you to decide by X date, where X is the amount of time you think it will take to hear back from other schools. In order to find out X, you can use the Results Search here to figure out approximate timeframes. ***You can also email the other schools directly and let them know that you have an offer from School A and they are asking for an early decision and you will be asking School A for an extension. So perhaps you could find out what this school's expected decision date is so that you can request an appropriate extension*** (However, this action might be very inappropriate for your field! In my field, this is common and accepted practice, and usually students will even use other schools' financial offers to negoiate a better one. But check with people in your field for field-specific norms). Finding out X might be tough and there might be a delay in hearing back from other schools. Luckily you have 9 days! I'd start emailing early and then send the request for extension at least one day prior to the deadline. But that's just how I would do it!

Your nationality doesn't affect your insurance rate. However, if your husband is American, does that mean you can apply for American permanent residency? Usually that means you are no longer considered an international student, which is a good thing for admissions. Usually non-Americans cost more in tuition so they admit fewer international students. You might also qualify for American grants!

You need to secure the position first, then worry about visa after. You should first seek/apply for all the positions you qualify for. When you get one, the school's International Office will work with you and your supervisor to ensure you are on the right visa. Good luck!

Indeed, this is something you should seek help for! At my school, you can also go to the Graduate Office if you don't feel like discussing the details with your advisor (or don't know how to tell your advisor).

In my field, theses are usually just all of your papers you published in grad school put together in thesis format, with some filler text in between. I agree you should document everything, especially methods, because you will have to write these up as papers and it will be a lot easier when you can just build a paper outline by combining all these chunks of writing that you wrote along the way. Yes, you should keep a database of all your papers you've read (or know about). I recommend software to make your life easier. I really like Mendeley (free, works on Linux, Mac and Windows) but Papers and others are good too. Starting now, before you have a huge database, is ideal! I use Google Calendar to keep my life organized. I find that the flexibility of academia/grad school is a double-edged sword. So, I schedule time for specific projects / work / classes and try to ensure I stay on task for that project during that time. I keep a 8 to 5 schedule because I like routine, with small exceptions for doctors or extra work for deadlines. Some people don't like doing this because rigid/structured time blocks "ruins" the flexibility of an academic schedule, but I think of flexibility as the freedom to decide when to place my rigid/structured time blocks But do whatever works for you!!

Oh yeah, grr taxes The only government I've every owed taxes to so far has been the United States! Despite how much Americans claim that Canadians get taxed a lot, for young people earning $20k-$30k per year, you actually pay more in taxes as an American than a Canadian (their tax credit system is a lot different/strange). On the bright side, make sure you claim your educational expenses as Canadian tax credit. Even if you get a tuition waiver, you will file it in Canada as getting paid $X (tuition amount) on top of your stipend but it's not taxable since it's income meant to support graduate education. You can also claim the standard educational amounts ($400/month living expenses as full time student, $80/month[i think] for books/supplies etc.). You need to get a TL-11A, which you can find online and ask your school to fill out that form with the dollar amounts of your tuition+fees as well as the number of months you were enrolled. So, while I am sad to be paying an extra $2000-$3000 to the US government in taxes, I am hoping that I'll get most of it back when I return to Canada and claim my educational tax credits! (Note: educational tax credits get used up before Canada considers Foreign Paid Tax credit so if you don't go back to Canada right away, you might not get full use of your educational tax credits).

Our food budget varied a bit in the last few years due to changes depending on how much money we had and how much time we had. For the first couple years of living together, we lived in a very low cost of living area and I had a lot more time (I'm the main cook) so I cooked all our meals and we ate out maybe once or twice per month. Since we had the extra money, we would buy nicer foods at the grocery store (and since we weren't eating out) we would spend about $80/week, so maybe $350-$400 per month on food for two people. Cooking your own food makes the money go a lot further -- even something nicer like a seafood pasta dish can cost as little as $15 per recipe (maybe works out to..$3-$4 per meal) instead of $15-$20 per plate at a restaurant! Then we moved to a higher cost of living and our income decreased (foreign work authorization requirement meant only single income for a little while) and we were able to drop down to around $200 per month for two people ($40-$50 per week) by buying lower quality food. Although we would be more tempted to order pizza more often etc. (luckily 2 pizzas costs like $15 and lasts for 6-8 meals total so it's not budget breaking) because we got tired of the same food all the time. Now, we both have steady incomes and can afford to spend more on food. We budget food and other grocery supplies (e.g. toothpaste etc.) together, so I don't know exactly how much we spend on food alone...probably close to $450-$500 per month for two people including eating out. I think $37/week for one person is very realistic if you cook all of your meals (maybe eat out once in awhile). We were in a high cost of living area and was able to manage two people on $37/week by cooking a lot so it's definitely do-able. However, one big thing I learned about budgeting wisely in the last 5 years (and this goes for all budgets, not just food) is that if you restrict yourself too much, you will actually end up spending more money overall because the temptation to splurge once in awhile is really hard to overcome and it's easy to undo months of budgeting with splurges. It's much better to spend a little more (e.g. buying seafood or other groceries you particularly like) and cook your own food than splurge on a nice meal out. Of course, maybe you have better willpower than we do!

This happens. I would say that it's a good thing this is happening at the MA thesis level, which does not matter at all if you plan on a PhD (that's what it sounds like). I think the new plan for your MA thesis sounds a lot better. You say that you don't even like this topic so why does it matter if your MA thesis includes biofeedback or not? At this point, I would just make your main goal be "do the minimum work necessary to finish the thesis and get out". In my field, Masters research does not have to be original research and usually, these theses are just like what your department head advised you to do--Masters theses are often a "future PhD study proposal", but you are not bound to it for your PhD. I would sit down with your thesis chair, talk to them about these suggested changes and make a new plan for now until April. I think it's better to have a well-done, less ambitious project for a Masters thesis than it is to have a poorly done but very ambitious project. April is only 2 full months away, so I think scaling back / reducing the scope of your MA thesis is a good idea. Or, in other words, a literature review/proposal is something that you know if you put the time in, it will get completed. New complicated research can be something that you pour months in but get nothing out if something goes wrong (often something out of your control). With only 2 months left, I'd play it safe and make my thesis focus on something I know that effort/time in = product out.

Keep it short and polite and be very appreciative of all the time and effort they put into helping you. Do not go into reasons why you picked another school, unless they ask (and even if they do, avoid saying anything negative about their program). Most schools will have you take an "exit survey" after you officially decline them and that's the right place to let them know things like "stipend was too low" etc. Also, don't be overly apologetic because then it sounds like you are saying that they will be not as well off now that you're not there. I wrote a few sentences like this: Dear X, Thank you again for all of your help with the application process and inviting me to visit your program. I really enjoyed meeting you and learning about your research. Unfortunately, I am writing to let you know that I decided to accept an offer elsewhere. I look forward to meeting you again at [insert conference here or whatever, as appropriate; you can also just omit this] Thank you again, TakeruK