nohika

I've had people (Mom + friends) suggest looking at apartments near the schools because I'm a planner, but I refuse to. I don't want to jinx my chances... They, of course, think I'm insane...

If I don't know if they want fall transcripts, should I ask if they do before sending them? Two of my schools, the ad-coms are meeting mid-Jan so it'd be close if I sent the grades now...and my school doesn't open until Jan 2nd (I don't know if the grades are officially posted though).

I hope so. I don't plan to quit, that's for certain. Another thing my Mom says that gets my goat is: "Oh, if you don't get in, that means God has another place for you." Well gee golly wiz, if it was that simple, then why doesn't he just tell me and I can go do it now? Not like I've spent hours agonizing over this decision in the first place...or worrying over it...

Mine's kind of similar...assumes the schools will be fighting over me and that I'll get into grad school and ("because I'm so smart") I'll just breeze through it, and do "grad school stuff". My Mom doesn't exactly know what grad school consists of...just that I'll be doing research. Sigh. The faith would be so inspiring if it wasn't so terrifying. I'm going to struggle, almost guaranteed, and fight imposter syndrome too.

My school was closed all this past week, but it sounds like I'll get to go in next week and start working for my mentor early...soooo excited to go back and have some type of distraction!! I've missed school so bad.

Same...everyone asks me that question. I'd generally be happy at all of the schools I applied to (four). Some have slight advantages (funding, fit, etc), but the one that lets me in and offers me the most money wins, hands down. Even if it's across the US (if anything, that's a boon). My Mom is the one that continues asking. My mentor/the other professors don't, thankfully. It's lovely having people that understand this whole process! Edit: And yes, I am sitting here refreshing this page every couple minutes. I have no life.

I know, right? I was just like...uh...um... And she's a really good student, too - straight-As, etc. The lack of knowledge about PhDs at my school in my department is ridiculous - I'm the only PhD-seeking student. Another student told me she didn't want to get a PhD because she didn't want to "spend the rest of her life behind a desk at some corporate job". ...uh...

Mom: "I'm sure you'll get in everywhere. They're gonna fight over you." Me: "Well...not really. I have decent research, but not the greatest GPA..." Mom: "Why don't you apply to [neighboring-state-school]?" Me: "Well, they don't really have anyone with the same research focus that I do." Mom: "That's why you should apply! They don't have anyone like you! You're different! Unique! Trust me, you'll be a shoe-in." Me: "..." We've had this conversation a million times. I did end up finding a professor that matched my interests and would be okay there, but the other schools have better research fits for me (explaining the whole research-fit thing was a NIGHTMARE). My mentor is at least realistic (more concerned about funding than acceptance)...but oh! Some other gems, when it comes to PhDs: Student: "So what do you want to do when you graduate?" Me: "Well...I'd like to go to grad school and become a professor." Student: "Oh my gosh, do you know they have to do RESEARCH? And like sit at a desk the whole time? Having a desk job sounds horrid." Me: "Well...I generally work on qualitative research, and do interviews and stuff, so.." Student: "Well, graduate school doesn't really sound that hard. I could get in if I tried. The professors that tell us that it's hard are liars. They hate me - that's why my grades are bad." Me: "...well you do that." Another student: Me: "-explaining about research fit, etc-" Student: "...why do you worry about that, anyways? Couldn't you just lie on your application and say you want to study something?" Me: "...well...yes, you could say you want to study A when you don't want to..." Student: "I'll just do that, then." -facepalm- The professors at my university are heavily research-involved (and those who get involved with the profs are too, but there's not many of us). Some students, though...ack. How do they /live/.

Been working for my mentor for three years now. Kind of like a surrogate parent to me now. My Mom's threatening to kick me out (again). I'd be more worried if she hasn't been threatening on and off for like a year.I just hope she never carries out the threat - not now. Not the final semester I need to before I graduate - and I have to graduate if I want to (hopefully) enter graduate school this coming fall. I work, but not enough to be able to live on my own if I have to... Nothing like an extra helping of stress, right?

I'm kind of jealous of this. I picked my schools based on fit, not having any idea on what really would be reaches/top schools/etc. Turns out a couple of the schools I applied to are the top programs. And my overall stats aren't very competitive (low overall GPA - like 3.1/3.2 low, depending - some have it as low as a 2.7), but decent GREs (89th in Verbal, 92nd in writing, but 65th in Quant), almost three years of research experience, awesome LORs. Mentor is cautiously optimistic and more on the edge of her seat than I am!!! So far, I am planning a training plan for the new shoes I got (high heels) so I can wear them without killing myself, putting my research hat on and finishing up some stuff for a paper I have to write that we plan to submit to a journal and basically trying to forget I ever applied to graduate school so I stop making myself sick. My stomach rolls and makes me nauseated every time I think about how close to the first decision I am (just a couple weeks).

My mentor's the same as you - "I'm sure it went well". I have no idea. If this process has taught me one thing, it's how absolutely little I know about this whole thing. My mentor is like "Oh, I'll let you know if she contacts me for a recommendation. I mean, I did the general ones, but." I'm like "...what?" I think even she forgets how little I know sometimes. I will be so glad when this whole process is over and I'm (hopefully) accepted. This stress cannot be healthy!

Was contacted by a professor at one of the schools and had a phone conversation with her this morning. It was relatively short (20min) and I dunno how well it went. I thought it went okay, but I have nothing to match it against. Commence freak-out. Pretending it never happened...

Ahhh, prestige... My whole family seems much more interested and happy with my sister who's a business major who wants to get her CPA than me who is applying to PhD programs. I think that comes from them not really knowing much /about/ PhD programs, but it still hurts. I agree it's the fear of failure - for me, it's of disappointing others, as if not getting in will make me look worse in their eyes. I've had a bad past and not done so well (I was 19 and not very good at juggling priorities). I own up to it. It was my mistake. I wasn't mature enough to handle the situation well. It still sucks that one quarter can haunt me so badly. I own up not studying enough for the math section of the GRE, hehe. Although a 65% isn't that bad, it could be much better. I was just lazy.

Okay, I fibbed. I thought it'd be the worst part. Like you guys said, I was wrong. Welcome to the worst holiday break I've ever had...

Omg, this. Every time my mentor mentions the apps I want to poke her with a stick or something because it sends my already-bad anxiety sky-rocketing. Three of my apps are officially complete. Just waiting on the fourth (waiting on transcripts and letters) and is due Jan 1. Then I can relax for a week or two before the first decision comes out, then relax for another month or so before the others start coming out. Aghhhhhhh. Just don't think about it. I think we'll all be grey before our times at this rate...

Agreed...my letter writers are amazing people and my mentor is amazingly supportive. She let me pick out my schools with absolutely no knowledge of the strength of the programs, and with a low GPA, may not have been the most brilliant idea. I really had no idea what I was doing (and to be honest, I still don't). I picked based on fit. I have a decent amount of research and will have a publication in the spring.... But I'm so scared of getting rejected from all the programs and having to "break" it to my recommenders. That'll suck.

Three out of four are completely submitted (everything's in, etc). Fourth is submitted, I'm just tracking materials. Extremely nervous about it because I only decided to apply there like a week ago. Something screwed up one of my four original schools (false info on a webpage, anyone?) and I had like a week to come up with a new app and write a long (4-6pg) SoP from scratch. Blech. Now the waiting begins. Thankfully I have interview transcribing, interviews, working on getting materials for my journal manuscript I'm going to start writing next semester, and prepping to join a data analysis team next semester...so things to keep me busy. I just try to avoid thinking about graduate school. If anything, I'm getting more sad about leaving my mentor of almost three years. She was getting emotional over it being "our last Christmas". Love the lady to death. Like a second Mom she is to me.

My Mom has done some college and has gotten a 2-year degree, but knows absolutely nothing about applying to grad school and is (pretty much) useless. I'm also getting more and more worried about the rift that is developing there, since I'm so far "ahead" of my family...it's kind of depressing. The only thing that's totally saving my butt right now is my mentor who is 500% behind me and helping me out every step of the way, as well as the other professors who are writing my letters and helping me out. It still makes me feel stupid on a somewhat daily basis, though. I'm pretty sure I've committed some disastrous blunders as well...such as not emailing profs yet (tomorrow? Friday?) and it being Thanksgiving next week, and aaaggghhhhh. Head. Explode.

Just starting my SOPs this weekend, but they'll go to my mentor for editing and possibly another one of my LOR writers, then go to them along with a CV for the letters to get written - and my first deadline is Dec 1!!!!!! I haven't been able to contact any professors yet (been super frickin' busy) and will also tackle that this weekend, but I'm a first-gen college student and totally lost in this whole process, so that doesn't help either. Oh, and I haven't started my writing sample yet either, but it's based off of some research I've done, so it's not /too/ bad. What a nightmare. Much more difficult than I anticipated.

I would really sit down and go through the topics and think about them. Because with a PhD, it's likely you'll end up doing a dissertation at some point that will be super specific - IE, in English, an example would be The Use of a Semicolon in Moby Dick. While I'm guessing you can learn a lot in your courses, the main goal of a PhD program is often to turn out good researchers, or researchers-to-be, anyways. From what I've heard (I'm still an undergrad - applying this fall) the job market isn't that great, to be honest. Not for most humanities, not for anyone. We just hired a new faculty at my department but it's the first one in three years. Have you done any research? Worked with a mentor on a project or anything? Research can be quite...hard at times. To work for months on a project only to get told "nope, we don't like it, do it again" just plain sucks sometimes. I've been assisting with stuff (entering surveys and the like) for about two years, and started my own projects/some big ones last year and have one poster with three presentations and an award, and hope to repeat it bigger and better this year. But it is grueling. If you are seriously considering a PhD, I'd recommend looking more at what research interests you instead of necessarily what subject. And especially with women's studies, it seems somewhat easy to combine it with media and the like.

I'm applying this fall and am somewhat terrified of it. However, I can't really imagine doing anything else other than this. I mean, I dream occasionally about doing something else when I'm stressed, but I like research and am liking where it leads me. I think stress sometimes causes doubt, and worry as well. There's also nothing really that I'd want to do after undergrad - a lot of the stuff I like is research/stats based, and there's really not much I can do after a bachelor's and I really want to be the one directing it. So. I also believe in if you can do something else besides grad school, do it.