Pains of Relocating

[clinicalpsychhopeful]

I’m curious to know what the biggest stressors are for y’all once you’re actually moved into your new place. Making new friends? Finding new establishments (e.g. healthcare, entertainment, personal care/wellness spots, food/grocery, etc.)? Being away from family? Something else? Obviously the moving process itself is stressful, but post-move days aren’t a walk in the park either. 

[pigeonbelow]

Agreed! I always struggle with finding my footing in a new city/town. I've moved enough now to know that I'm guaranteed to experience a month-long emotional low that comes from sudden instability and the feeling of being uprooted. Trying to navigate a new physical and social landscape doesn't help either. What helps me most is just time, really. Once I feel settled in a new routine, the melancholy and much of the stress goes away.

[bibliophile222]

Personally, I get excited exploring a new area, and I've moved enough in my life to not really feel homesick. The hardest part of moving for me this last time (I know this is silly) was finding new restaurants. I'd lived in my previous area for over a decade and had many an amazing meal at Johnny's Tavern, Thai Garden, Ginger Garden, The Black Sheep, and Primo Pizzeria (major bonus points if anyone can guess where I was living!) After two years in my new location, I still feel like I don't have a favorite pizza or Chinese place, and I'm lacking that strong connection to the businesses that I had before. 

I guess the moral of the story is that I shouldn't eat out so damn much!

[Peter K.]

I'm lazy by nature, so for me the hardest part about moving is making the effort to make new friends.

[lkjhgfdsa]

On 5/25/2020 at 8:07 AM, bibliophile222 said:

I'd lived in my previous area for over a decade and had many an amazing meal at Johnny's Tavern, Thai Garden, Ginger Garden, The Black Sheep, and Primo Pizzeria (major bonus points if anyone can guess where I was living!)

It's Amherst, right? Wow, I miss those spots!

[bibliophile222]

10 hours ago, lkjhgfdsa said:

It's Amherst, right? Wow, I miss those spots!

Yep! It's amazing how many good restaurants are packed into the Amherst/Northampton area. 

[NotNomNom]

I think setting up a life is difficult, tbh. I've lived in a few places, and the hassle of closing banks, driver's license, changing mail address, getting the right documents at the right locations sometimes come to bite. Also, losing friends is a big deal. It's hard to have many and even harder to keep them. You may say that true friends never leave, and indeed they don't, but being out of touch with what's going on can really suck. 

[clinicalpsychhopeful]

On 5/25/2020 at 8:07 AM, bibliophile222 said:

Personally, I get excited exploring a new area, and I've moved enough in my life to not really feel homesick. The hardest part of moving for me this last time (I know this is silly) was finding new restaurants. I'd lived in my previous area for over a decade and had many an amazing meal at Johnny's Tavern, Thai Garden, Ginger Garden, The Black Sheep, and Primo Pizzeria (major bonus points if anyone can guess where I was living!) After two years in my new location, I still feel like I don't have a favorite pizza or Chinese place, and I'm lacking that strong connection to the businesses that I had before. 

I guess the moral of the story is that I shouldn't eat out so damn much!

That's not silly at all! That struggle of trying to find new places for food, entertainment, wellness, medical, etc. is REAL. I feel like I get such search fatigue between the app process and finding new businesses for my needs and leisure,

[Crucial BBQ]

On 5/24/2020 at 3:05 AM, clinicalpsychhopeful said:

I’m curious to know what the biggest stressors are for y’all once you’re actually moved into your new place. Making new friends? Finding new establishments (e.g. healthcare, entertainment, personal care/wellness spots, food/grocery, etc.)? Being away from family? Something else? Obviously the moving process itself is stressful, but post-move days aren’t a walk in the park either. 

I am originally from the West Coast and first moved to the MidWest. Then back to my hometown. Then back to the MidWest, but a different State.  Then to New England.  Then to another New England State.  Then to Maryland.  I found the hardest part about moving is not coming to terms with how much stuff you actually own.   The packing, even if you think you don't own much, especially when you don't own much, takes way longer than you think it would.  

Okay, so maybe that is not the hardest part.  Leaving friends and family is certainly hard, but you don't really lose them.... until you do.  I find that you will be attracted to the same types of people no matter where you go. I also find that once the newness and excitement fades there is this realization that where you are at now is not that much different from where you came.  Of course it is but those differences are only unique to you and your memories.  Don't feel guilty about finding a new group of best friends, your old group of best friends are still your bestest friends of all.  

Who you are doesn't change and you'll gravitate towards that which you always gravitated towards.  I think the hardest part about moving is not allowing yourself to accept that your new location is not your old location and that you made the choice to move there in the first place.  What really helped me was the understanding that I could always move back if I really wanted to.  

On 6/21/2020 at 8:27 AM, bibliophile222 said:

Yep! It's amazing how many good restaurants are packed into the Amherst/Northampton area. 

I always had a good time in Northampton and could see myself living there for sure. 

Edited January 6, 2021 by Crucial BBQ