pears
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Posts posted by pears
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...you're going to be spending 4 days at a professional conference surrounded by professors from your second-becoming-top choice school (as well as a few professors from a PhD program you're interested in for the not-so-distant future), probably right after you find out whether you got in...
- Starbuck2015 and Z4Zebra
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2
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personally, i'd hang tight until tomorrow or friday, but i tend to bank on the cautious side of things. i don't see the harm in calling!
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hey there,
i'm not a grad student (yet!), so i can't speak to the academic problems out of experience. that said, i've been dealing with crippling depression for years, and all of its equally horrible but constantly changing manifestations (i'm going to keep this trigger-free, but i suspect you probably know what i'm talking about; these things change between age 11 and age 22). i'm always in and out of therapy, on and off medications. most days are great, but there are definitely some days when getting out of bed is a major feat, so i can empathize.
the only insight i can really give you, then, is that a chemical imbalance does not necessitate a state of mind. you are not your depression. you are a good, hardworking, dedicated student who pretty much got the short, poop-smeared end of the brain chemistry lottery. for example, i consider myself to be a happy, social person by nature, but letting that shine instead of, say, a "protective" layer of cynicism and self-doubt borne out of insecurities, is a constant uphill battle. hearing people say "just cheer up!" is immensely frustrating, and usually isn't helpful, so i'll try to give you practical advice that i've picked up along the way that has helped me.
first, like i said, remember that you are not your depression; a chemical imbalance doesn't have the right to determine what kind of person you are.
second, focus on one task at a time, but keep a running schedule -- including as much time as you can feasibly get for things like exercise, social outings, etc. -- so you don't let yourself slip into the inertia of being unable to get the gears turning. it takes some getting used to, but i've found that blocking off my time and sticking to what i've planned is a very successful way to not only get myself up and running, but to keep moving, and keep my mind too busy to occupy itself with negative thoughts. only you can keep yourself busy, and only you know your limits, so don't push yourself too much.. but also, don't push too little.
third, reach out to people, especially if you're making a change (be it a change of advisers or a change of scenery). even if you're geographically further from your usual support network, it is absolutely essential to stay in touch. don't hold back about sharing feelings, as long as you're comfortable; it's okay to be scared, nervous, lonely, etc. you're only human. reach out to all possible LoR writers as soon as you can; get in touch with your initial writers, if need be.
fourth, be progressive, even when it's hard to be positive. you may feel that you're ensnared in a negative situation, but there's no way to get yourself out if you don't keep moving towards a new goal. don't bite off more than you can chew. set simple, but attainable, goals for each day. one day, talk to you adviser about your plans; another day, meet with potential new advisors or LoR writers; another, submit [X number] of applications to different programs, and so on. reward yourself with simple things when you can, especially if your goal was a particularly emotionally taxing one, e.g., go for a mellow bike ride to clear your head or treat yourself to a nice meal after meeting with your (jerky) adviser.
i hope those help. i realize it's hard to put someone else's words into action, but those are the things that have helped me the most. also, don't be too down on yourself: you clearly love what your field of research is, and you wouldn't be in grad school for it if you weren't cut out for it in the first place. don't lose sight of your passion, and keep pressing forward; your dedication, despite this crappy situation, means that you will find a way to do what you love, even while you're fighting against the multi-headed dragon of depression at all times. if anything, the fact that you're fighting depression on top of said crappy situation means that you're definitely not a failure. kudos to you for not giving up! best of luck!
ps: feel free to PM me at any time.
- zapster, rising_star, ProfLorax and 1 other
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i'm not a climber, but an outdoor enthusiast in general, so i totally feel you as far as factoring outdoor resources into my decisions go! my top two choices are surrounded by outdoor playgrounds. my current fixations are fishing, whitewater kayaking, and snowboarding, and i'm learning how to ride a dirt bike this weekend. i'm not particularly good at any of them, but i really enjoy all of them, so that's good enough for me!
a friend of mine convinced me to try bouldering with him once tahoe's snow season is over, so here's to hoping i don't totally wreck myself! i tried ice climbing a few times when i was an undergrad, too, since we had a great lodge and mountain club with lots of active, super skilled, generally wonderful members. the east coast isn't always prime for skiing and snowboarding, but dang, our ice was nice. i was pretty terrible but i liked it anyway! i'm actually terrified of open heights, which is exactly why i want to learn how to climb (and skydive, but that's for when i'm not totally broke..). i might invest in that this month, actually- there's a gym with a deal on a month-long beginner course just 10 minutes from me by bike.
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phigirl: yesterday marked 6 weeks passing from the deadline, which seems to be when most programs say it's okay to contact them. it's actually been more than 6 weeks for another one of my programs, but they apparently keep accepting applications until friday, so that's why i'm holding off on that one. also, i'm admittedly terrified that asking about my status at the second one (my second choice that's turning into my top choice as my current top choice's funding prospects are.. not so great) will somehow affect me negatively, so i might just have to be patient. what a delicate balance! woof.
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vicki- i'll probably end up in the same boat as you, but i do agree with what phoenix and linelei have said: money is a major issue, but not the only issue; you don't want to sacrifice fit, in the short and long term, both in and out of school. spend as much time as you can talking to your POIs at both schools, get in touch with some students, and talk to your POI and financial aid folks at school A. basically, double check to make sure that your sense of "fit" is 100% correct, see if school B could work for you, and see if school A can adjust your funding or offer more ideas.
besides those questions and job placement, i would also do some quick research (aka snooping around on google) about what kind of salary you can expect. personally, that's going to be a big factor in how i decide; for my top choice program, i'd be getting little to no help, and the maximum amount of loans i'd be taking out for the 2 years is equal to or greater than what i could expect to make in a year if i were hired right away, which kind of spells imminent financial doom. i'm not going directly into a PhD program, though, so i'm in a different situation. just something to consider!
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tested the waters this morning and sent my first "sooo.. what's the adcomm's status as far as decisions go right now?" email.
brb, spending the rest of the day curled up under my desk like a ball of nerves until i get a response.
- waiting123, sansao and anaZep
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prime factor
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Silver dollar
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+1 to lentils! all things lentil = amazing. i'm a pescatarian with some funky eating habits, so the protein and cost of lentils make them some of my favorite things ever! i cook mine down in a 1:4 mix of white wine to veggie stock, and throw in some saffron or curry powder. mujaddara is the best- i spice my rice with coriander and cumin, caramelize my onions, spin honey into my yogurt, and roast some crushed almonds with brown sugar and sea salt to crumble on top of it all. nommm. i think i know what i'm making for lunch then dinner then lunch again tonight, hah!
also, depending on where you live, salmon can be really cheap, too. i broil mine for 12 minutes with light mayo and dill- the mayo sounds gross (i'm not a fan of mayo on anything else), but it keeps the fish soft and moist, and the flavor of the dill makes you forget what your fish is topped with. cheap and easy, especially if you grow your own herbs.
- Dal PhDer, Zencarrot and merrysoprano
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space heater
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sour apple
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leap frog
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it depends on the situation, really- it seems like other users here have found delicate ways to mention it, if their decision making process is coming down to funding. however, if you're just curious about when you'll be hearing back, i wouldn't mention it.
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I'm thinking a weekend away in a nice hotel somewhere just far enough from home that I don't accidentally bump into someone I know.
oh man, i know that feeling.. i'm taking my vacation right after 4/15. my better half and i are going backpacking through the "green" trinity alps for a week (fresh fish and rice for dinner every night? not a soul in sight? subalpine lakes so blue they make you wince when it's sunny out? yes please!), then wrapping it up with some bluegrass and friends at the mountain i've been riding all season. april can't come fast enough for so, so many reasons!
also congrats bedmas!! let the tears of joy flow!
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has it been more than 6 weeks since your applications to the other schools were considered "complete"/"processed"?
if yes: send a polite email to the department contact person (chair or secretary)
if no: wait until 6 weeks have passed, then refer to "if yes"
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family recipe
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sweetpearl: thanks! and congrats on your acceptance, by the way!
anxiousanthro: good to know! thank you especially for the time frame- it's a big relief to know i probably won't have to wait too long to hear something one way or the other. i was so confused by it all that i actually forwarded it to my (very honest/blunt) S.O., and even he didn't have a clue about how to interpret it. it seems one other person heard from the same school for the same department last friday. i submitted my materials on time, but thanks to its horrible bureaucracy and slow mail, my official transcript from my time in australia didn't arrive until a few days after the deadline, with approval from the dept., so perhaps i'll have a later decision, since my materials were pokey.
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covalent bonds
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("progressive") bluegrass is good for the soul!
"truly, underneath the stars, there are a million ways to be the way you are.."
("'neath the stars" by railroad earth)"in my own defense, i don't believe that i.. was born.. this complicated"
("complicated" by yonder mountain string band)
all around devestatingly great lyrics. chris thile is a beast!
("you are" by punch brothers) -
any other texas state applicants out there? i got an extremely cryptic email today, as well as some equally cryptic minor updates to my application status page. they seem to be hinting at an acceptance:
"Thank you for submitting your application to Texas State University. According to the State of Texas rules and regulations for determining residence status, and based upon information provided on the ApplyTexas application, you have been classified as a non-resident for tuition purposes. […]Please be sure that your tuition charges are properly coded when you register. If you have questions about your residency you may refer to the Coordinating Board’s website[…]
This letter pertains to your residency classification for tuition purposes only. It does not constitute official acceptance to Texas State."i don't want to get ahead of myself, but i would say this is a good sign, no? -
interviewing tips, from dogs:
don't be too formal.
don't be too casual, either, and definitely get lots of rest the night before.
talk yourself up, but don't try to be someone you're not.
don't forget: strong, engaging, open body language is important!
a little personal touch to the old "skirt and blouse"/"blazer and tie" look never hurts, but don't get too crazy.
no matter what you decide to wear, a smile is the most important accessory!
- eaboo316, courtc8891, queenleblanc and 8 others
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The Waiting Game - Fall 2013 - Share your progress!
in Anthropology Forum
Posted
WOOHOO RADIOMARS! congratulations!