Ilikekitties

Yes, I understand. I thought that your initial comment was very good at putting rejection into perspective and comparing academia to things outside of academia. I'm in no way saying that people who were once in my shoes can't be empathetic, but I am saying that grad students and grads/professors have the gift of certainty in terms of being in a program and hindsight in terms of being able to reflect. I have the gift of certainty with college; 5 years ago I was a wreck waiting for undergrad schools to get back and I didn't know what was gonna happen. I thought that the world was gonna end because I didn't have a concrete plan. Now I think "well, now I'm in a different place and I'm facing new struggles." People in the workplace will probably always feel this way, especially when it comes to job security. I could go to an undergrad forum and give some good advice to some kids in agony, and I'll have a certain understanding of that, but I also have the sort of "bias" or whatever because I've been where they're trying to go. Again, this doesn't mean that advice from me wouldn't be helpful or that I wouldn't be empathetic. That being said, I think that everyone's struggles are relative and they all should be acknowledged as valid, so someone struggling to get into grad school and someone struggling to get a job or to get grants have something in common. We're all at different places.
I got one acceptance last year, but it was to a MA program with minimal funding in a very expensive city, so I decided not to attend. The decision not to attend ended up being for the better because now I'm really glad that I didn't go to grad school right away. Hindsight is a gift because only now do I understand that the choice not to attend was a good one. 1 year ago if you had told me this, I would have called you crazy because I was hellbent on going to grad school.
 

@AP had great advice. I'm not dismissing them. I'm talking about posters in general on here. Although most posters mean well, I do think that thinking about perspective is important, however, because not everyone has been to grad school and has past experiences to reflect on. Someday, maybe we will. Grad school is a place where many of us want to be and have tried to be, and have failed basically. Many of us don't have the experience or the privilege to say "ok, this is how I felt at this time in my life. Now I feel this way still, even though I'm where I wanted to be years ago." Not that exactly, but I think this goes for everyone who can look back. Some of us can only look forward. It's not a criticism of posters. It's just a product of where we are in our careers. I'll say the same thing about my professors who made it through grad school and who now have jobs in academia: good job, you made it. I see that there will always be troubles. But...you got there. You still made it. Some of us haven't even gotten there and we don't know if we will.
I'll also say that if I ever make it into grad school, I will never again understand what it's like for an applicant who hasn't gotten in. I may be like "well, it took me a couple tries, but eventually...." okay. An applicant who gets rejection after rejection doesn't even know if they'll get in "eventually." It's the uncertainty that sucks more than anything. People told me, "oh, you're an excellent applicant. You'll get in!" and then I didn't. It's a total crapshoot.

Idk. I applied last year as well and I got most of my rejections in March. People kept saying "no news might be good news!" but that wasn't the case with me.

That's fantastic!

I'll just say something: some people, in general, speak from the position of being in a program and dealing with disappointment, where others are speaking about getting rejected from programs or not getting any acceptances. These are two very different places and hindsight is 20/20. Some of us just wanna get in and worry about the trials of grad school and academia later. We know that grad school isn't always a happy place, but it'd be nice to at least get there first.

@AP had great advice. I'm not dismissing them. I'm talking about posters in general on here. Although most posters mean well, I do think that thinking about perspective is important, however, because not everyone has been to grad school and has past experiences to reflect on. Someday, maybe we will. Grad school is a place where many of us want to be and have tried to be, and have failed basically. Many of us don't have the experience or the privilege to say "ok, this is how I felt at this time in my life. Now I feel this way still, even though I'm where I wanted to be years ago." Not that exactly, but I think this goes for everyone who can look back. Some of us can only look forward. It's not a criticism of posters. It's just a product of where we are in our careers. I'll say the same thing about my professors who made it through grad school and who now have jobs in academia: good job, you made it. I see that there will always be troubles. But...you got there. You still made it. Some of us haven't even gotten there and we don't know if we will.
I'll also say that if I ever make it into grad school, I will never again understand what it's like for an applicant who hasn't gotten in. I may be like "well, it took me a couple tries, but eventually...." okay. An applicant who gets rejection after rejection doesn't even know if they'll get in "eventually." It's the uncertainty that sucks more than anything. People told me, "oh, you're an excellent applicant. You'll get in!" and then I didn't. It's a total crapshoot.

@AP had great advice. I'm not dismissing them. I'm talking about posters in general on here. Although most posters mean well, I do think that thinking about perspective is important, however, because not everyone has been to grad school and has past experiences to reflect on. Someday, maybe we will. Grad school is a place where many of us want to be and have tried to be, and have failed basically. Many of us don't have the experience or the privilege to say "ok, this is how I felt at this time in my life. Now I feel this way still, even though I'm where I wanted to be years ago." Not that exactly, but I think this goes for everyone who can look back. Some of us can only look forward. It's not a criticism of posters. It's just a product of where we are in our careers. I'll say the same thing about my professors who made it through grad school and who now have jobs in academia: good job, you made it. I see that there will always be troubles. But...you got there. You still made it. Some of us haven't even gotten there and we don't know if we will.
I'll also say that if I ever make it into grad school, I will never again understand what it's like for an applicant who hasn't gotten in. I may be like "well, it took me a couple tries, but eventually...." okay. An applicant who gets rejection after rejection doesn't even know if they'll get in "eventually." It's the uncertainty that sucks more than anything. People told me, "oh, you're an excellent applicant. You'll get in!" and then I didn't. It's a total crapshoot.

I'll just say something: some people, in general, speak from the position of being in a program and dealing with disappointment, where others are speaking about getting rejected from programs or not getting any acceptances. These are two very different places and hindsight is 20/20. Some of us just wanna get in and worry about the trials of grad school and academia later. We know that grad school isn't always a happy place, but it'd be nice to at least get there first.

I've had a good share of rejections so here are my two cents: 
Rejections, like coursework, are part of grad school and your academic career. You are going to be rejected so many times in the future that I can't even find a nice sugarcoat for it. You will submit articles that will get bluntly sent back. You will apply for grants that take months to prepare and one day you'll get the horrible letter. Every one of those rejections is going to hurt so, if you want to succeed, you will need to eventually develop some type of coping mechanism. I give myself chocolate.  Rejections hurt right now because they are too personal. Academia is too personal. You will see that you will be trained to behave like a professional but at the end of the day, you are leaving things aside to pursue this. Everybody knows this. I don't have kids, but friends of mine do and I can see how much at stake they have in their hands. So, of course it hurts! It's natural, it bothers us, but wondering about it, unfortunately, does not make us any good.  Take rejections as an opportunity. I was rejected from a program that I thought was the program. Great fit, great funding, and extended conversations over Skype with POI. I mean, I just knew it was my place in the world. I was rejected with that cold letter that gives no explanation. That pushed me to the program I am now and I couldn't be happier. I seriously doubt I would have come to this program if I hadn't been rejected in the other one. Also, a rejection is a chance to re-evaluate how you deal with life itself. In my case, I used to cry for a day or two. Then I figured that was a total waste of time so instead I would give myself a nice meal -any of my choosing- and tell my advisors once I had dealt with it. I am surprised of myself! Rejections are not shameful. I don't know about you right now, but I am always ashamed of telling my advisor that I didn't get a grant, again. I feel like the ugly duckling who never gets anything. She never made me feel that way and is always encouraging me to move on, but still, I am the only one of her students who didn't get even a tiny grant. This is the hardest part for me, but as I said, I learned to deal with it.  Being hurt is an emotional response. We cannot control what makes us angry or happy or sad. But we can control how to react and what to do with it. Yes, take your time to be blue, but don't make it your sole response.   
 

One of my recommenders wrote to me after I notified her about my most recent rejection: "I'm sorry to hear that, XXXXXXX, but keep hope alive! Excellent candidates are supposed to receive rejections in this system. Remember your value."

Their cultural anthro program does staggered admission, so I'd have to wait until Fall 2018 to apply again.

I don't know when the admitted students weekend is. I saw one online for the undergrads, but I didn't see anything for their anthropology dept. The email said that I should expect to receive a decision by early April.

I got on the alternate list for my top choice PhD program. Does anyone know what this means? Like, do I have an actual chance for acceptance, or does it depend on the program? I have no idea how many people are also on the alternate list. Is it good, bad, or neutral? I just don't wanna get my hopes up.
 

I do not speak Chinese and I will be leaving for China at the end of the month. I have lived abroad before (not in China) so I have gone through the various ups and downs of culture shock and the like. Not that my other experiences abroad will prepare for living in a place in which I don't know the language, but I'm familiar with the feeling of living abroad in a foreign setting.
The university that I will be teaching at does renew contracts, but I'm pretty sure that they have to invite you back.
I'm not sure about the number of programs that I will apply to. This year, I'm thinking quality over quantity. Perhaps fewer than 11 or 12 programs so that I will be able to spend more time on each app. This is something that I will talk over with a recommender or two of mine.
I also don't have the luxury of waiting to apply next year. In college I was part of a program that aimed to get students from underrepresented backgrounds into PhD programs right after graduation, so they depend on numbers for funding (getting students into PhD programs and hopefully seeing the students complete them). I could be wrong about this, but they may need a certain percentage of each cohort in a PhD program within X amount of years. Basically, they want us in grad school. This, however, does not detract from the fact that I want to apply this fall if I can.

At this point, I'm asking myself "what the heck am I doing with my life?!"

Hi all. I've been rejected to three programs so far, and I got these rejections a few weeks ago. For these schools, would I have been a weaker candidate? What does it mean if I have not heard from the other schools yet?

If they're gonna deny me already, they should just do it!

The New School for Social Research - the letter didn't say anything about who I'd be working with, but I hope to work with Hugh Raffles on human-animal stuff.

Gaaaahhhh the wait is killing me!

Just because we don't get in anywhere doesn't mean that we are not competitive. I've been told by numerous faculty that I am competitive.

I got into a Master's in anthropology program with partial funding!

The New School for Social Research - the letter didn't say anything about who I'd be working with, but I hope to work with Hugh Raffles on human-animal stuff.

I got into a Master's in anthropology program with partial funding!

Just because we don't get in anywhere doesn't mean that we are not competitive. I've been told by numerous faculty that I am competitive.

Just because we don't get in anywhere doesn't mean that we are not competitive. I've been told by numerous faculty that I am competitive.