ProTrans Posted March 30, 2014 Posted March 30, 2014 Had and loved roommates in undergrad... but it's been a lovely couple of years without them. BUT we'd have to to take out far less loans if we got a place with roommates. Has anyone found fellow grad students for roommates? How did you go about finding them?
pearspears Posted March 30, 2014 Posted March 30, 2014 I am wrestling with this as well and so I thought back on the last ten years of college and after, and thought through the most stressful times....and while I have a few people I am still friends with, without a doubt the most stressful times all involved living with people. Their drama spilling into what should have been school. My aversion to living with people is in fact so extreme that I would rather live at home, buy a car, and commute an hour and a half one way to avoid it. So, I guess it depends on what you are willing to put up with. Since I will have a fellowship I decided roomates aren't worth it.
stella_ella Posted March 30, 2014 Posted March 30, 2014 - university portal - university sublet page (group pages on facebook) - kijiji - asked friends of friends ProTrans 1
ProTrans Posted March 30, 2014 Author Posted March 30, 2014 - university portal - university sublet page (group pages on facebook) - kijiji - asked friends of friends I've asked at my goal school about these things and they don't seem to have them. (It is a REALLY small school though)
aphdapplicant Posted March 30, 2014 Posted March 30, 2014 If you live in a big college city, you might be able to find normal people on craigslist. It's what I did freshman year - moved to a totally different place and didn't know anyone.
St Andrews Lynx Posted March 30, 2014 Posted March 30, 2014 Just be aware that most graduate roommates will be different from your undergraduate ones. They will often be more concerned with their work and jobs than hanging out and doing stuff together, and require more privacy/personal time when they are at home. If you advertise on Craiglist as being a [suitable adjective] graduate student, my guess is that you will attract plenty of graduate students. If there are other larger universities near to your school, perhaps you can explore their official websites and message boards for prospective roomies.
likemythesis Posted March 30, 2014 Posted March 30, 2014 Is there anyone from your school going to the same grad school? I lucked out and my close friend's boyfriend is actually headed the same way as me, so we're looking into places together.
microarray Posted March 30, 2014 Posted March 30, 2014 i've had terrible experiences with roommates. i don't think i could have them ever again even if they were grad students too..
Varangian Posted March 30, 2014 Posted March 30, 2014 I think it comes down to how much do you want to put up with another person's bullshit. I am at a time/age where I just don't want to deal with roommates anymore. I want to feel like the space that I am inhabiting is really mine - that I'm not just moving into a room. I don't want to deal with the potential of someone who is messy/disorganized/doesn't clean or has a significant other over all the time. I don't want to worry about disturbing someone if they are trying to sleep or being disturbed by them. But that comes with the trade off of paying more for rent and utilities. Which one you are willing to consider more is going to depend on where you're going. If it's somewhere like New York, unless you want to live 1 hour or more away from your campus, you will likely need a roommate just to cover basic expenses because the stipend won't be enough. If it's somewhere like the Midwest, you are more likely to be able to afford your own space.
maelia8 Posted March 31, 2014 Posted March 31, 2014 I am a few years out of undergrad and I actually still prefer living with roommates. I've lived in everything from a double dorm room shared with another person, a single room in a dorm with a community kitchen and bathrooms, student apartments with 1-3 other roommates, and private housing with 1-3 other roommates, and I've had overwhelmingly positive experiences. I have had just one bad roommate situation, which occurred because the roommate was my landlord (BAD IDEA, try to avoid this!). I also lived alone once in a one-room apartment, and I actually did not enjoy it - I felt lonely a lot of the time, and I found it harder to make an effort to go out and make friends in a new place or keep the apartment clean/decorated because I felt like it didn't matter since no one was going to see it. Even though I don't believe your roommate has to be your best friend, it's nice sometimes to know that someone else is breathing in the next room and that you could turn to them in the case of an emergency Maybe it's because I'm a deep sleeper and don't care much about others' sleeping/sexual time schedules, as well as being a very tidy, clean person who doesn't care as much if my roommates are as well. I'll be moving to an extremely expensive area in the Fall, and I will definitely be looking for a roommate or co-op situation to live in when I move there.
hj2012 Posted March 31, 2014 Posted March 31, 2014 I am a few years out of undergrad and I actually still prefer living with roommates. I've lived in everything from a double dorm room shared with another person, a single room in a dorm with a community kitchen and bathrooms, student apartments with 1-3 other roommates, and private housing with 1-3 other roommates, and I've had overwhelmingly positive experiences. I have had just one bad roommate situation, which occurred because the roommate was my landlord (BAD IDEA, try to avoid this!). I also lived alone once in a one-room apartment, and I actually did not enjoy it - I felt lonely a lot of the time, and I found it harder to make an effort to go out and make friends in a new place or keep the apartment clean/decorated because I felt like it didn't matter since no one was going to see it. Even though I don't believe your roommate has to be your best friend, it's nice sometimes to know that someone else is breathing in the next room and that you could turn to them in the case of an emergency Maybe it's because I'm a deep sleeper and don't care much about others' sleeping/sexual time schedules, as well as being a very tidy, clean person who doesn't care as much if my roommates are as well. I'll be moving to an extremely expensive area in the Fall, and I will definitely be looking for a roommate or co-op situation to live in when I move there. Wow, your philosophy toward roommates sounds nearly exactly like mine! Are you searching for a roommate for the fall?
maelia8 Posted March 31, 2014 Posted March 31, 2014 Sure am, have you decided definitively on Berkeley? If you have, send me a private message and maybe we could look together
overworkedta Posted March 31, 2014 Posted March 31, 2014 My personal opinion: it's not worth it if you can find a smaller place for cheap. Find a decently clean place, nothing special and take solace in the silence. I have a roommate now. It started off fine, but it's become more stress and hassle than I've wanted all because I got an SO and am rarely home (which the roommate detests). It's been a lot of nonsense. I have had to do things I wouldn't normally do because my roommate is also one of my best friends and I would like it to stay that way. This coming year, I am living with my SO and I think we will be closer friends for it. I lived on my own when I moved out here and it was GLORIOUS. That said, I know it can be out of some people's budgets. My recs: room with acquaintances but not friends. Friends are great when things are great. When there are issues, those issues are amplified to the nth degree! ss2player 1
stella_ella Posted March 31, 2014 Posted March 31, 2014 I've asked at my goal school about these things and they don't seem to have them. (It is a REALLY small school though) I have a friend who emailed their academic coordinator, who then sent out an email to all students enrolled in the program about roommate searching. Perhaps you could try this?
stella_ella Posted March 31, 2014 Posted March 31, 2014 My personal opinion: it's not worth it if you can find a smaller place for cheap. Find a decently clean place, nothing special and take solace in the silence. I have a roommate now. It started off fine, but it's become more stress and hassle than I've wanted all because I got an SO and am rarely home (which the roommate detests). It's been a lot of nonsense. I have had to do things I wouldn't normally do because my roommate is also one of my best friends and I would like it to stay that way. This coming year, I am living with my SO and I think we will be closer friends for it. I lived on my own when I moved out here and it was GLORIOUS. That said, I know it can be out of some people's budgets. My recs: room with acquaintances but not friends. Friends are great when things are great. When there are issues, those issues are amplified to the nth degree! I agree with this. But from my experience, it's good to room with friends of friends, as the friend can hold both you and your roommate accountable to your actions.
rising_star Posted April 1, 2014 Posted April 1, 2014 I lived with roommates for years while a grad student. Most of the time, I didn't mind it but I also wasn't friends with most of those roommates. The best experience I had was the first year of my MA when I lived with an undergrad senior. They were very, very responsible and enrolled in an elementary ed program. That year was probably more grueling for my roommate (classes, full-time teaching in a school, plus part-time job) than it was for me. Also, they were a fantastic roommate, so much so that I went to their wedding years later. I've also had inconsiderate, rude roommates and ones in between. It really all depends on you and the other people. For example, the one time I lived in a place with 3 roommates (all grad students, one from my department), it was a complete disaster. On the other hand, two of my good friends from the PhD program decided to live together without having ever met and ended up being roommates for three years. They're still friends. For me, I just realized that I kinda like living alone and being able to do my own thing, without having to worry about or accommodate anyone else (other than my dog).
ProTrans Posted April 5, 2014 Author Posted April 5, 2014 Is there anyone from your school going to the same grad school? I lucked out and my close friend's boyfriend is actually headed the same way as me, so we're looking into places together. No... my undergrad was a small school and the grad school (fingers crossed!) is WAY smaller But it is in a college town with multiple universities, I may have luck that way.
ProTrans Posted April 5, 2014 Author Posted April 5, 2014 I have a friend who emailed their academic coordinator, who then sent out an email to all students enrolled in the program about roommate searching. Perhaps you could try this? I like that idea! Thanks!!!
Crucial BBQ Posted April 7, 2014 Posted April 7, 2014 Had and loved roommates in undergrad... but it's been a lovely couple of years without them. BUT we'd have to to take out far less loans if we got a place with roommates. Has anyone found fellow grad students for roommates? How did you go about finding them? Around these parts it is common for grad students to rent out rooms in owner-occupied homes. There are tons of listings on Craigslist.
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