Favorite conversation starters?

[stella_ella]

What do you say to someone you've never met before? Talking about weather will only last about 3 seconds, and then you're back to where you started.

[justinmcummings]

I usually start with "Hello.", followed by a good bit of awkward silence. If the person hasn't left by then I talk about whatever meeting or function we are at. If it's not a professional, buisness, or academic situation, I usually have nothing.

[Guest Gnome Chomsky]

Fuck, marry, kill... 

Edited April 2, 2014 by Gnome Chomsky

[maelia8]

I'm trying to think of a situation where you are obligated to talk to strangers OTHER than a professional, business, or academic situation and I can't think of any … if you're at a party, I assume you have at least a couple of friends there, and if you're trying to pick someone up in a bar or fitness club, then you don't need conversation starters as much as bold pick-up lines.

[Quantum Buckyball]

I'm trying to think of a situation where you are obligated to talk to strangers OTHER than a professional, business, or academic situation and I can't think of any … if you're at a party, I assume you have at least a couple of friends there, and if you're trying to pick someone up in a bar or fitness club, then you don't need conversation starters as much as bold pick-up lines.

 

Oh I know what you meant, it's so hard to have a normal conversation without mentioning my research or school related stuff...

 

well, I supposed you could talk about sports or video games....

[St Andrews Lynx]

I'll ask who they are and what do they do. Then I'll ask follow-up questions. Hopefully at some point it will morph from just me asking questions to the 2 of us having a dialogue. 

[starofdawn]

I have 2 starter questions:

- Have you seen any good movies lately?

- Any travel (or recently passed) travel plans?

[DigDeep(inactive)]

Start with a friendly compliment. Everyone likes compliments! The type of compliment depends on the situation, of course (i.e., conference = research compliment; date or new friend = clothing, music, or jewelry compliment). Regardless, flattery always seems to work. Small talk kind of sucks. Conversation is an art, and talking about weather, travel, or movies (sorry above guy/gal) is like my 3 year old nephew's finger paintings - they suck. You might as well just say: "Hey! I'm boring and I have nothing interesting to say! Nice to meet you!".

 

Honestly, I always use a compliment and then judge their reaction (i.e., body language or facial expressions). You can tell if someones not in the mood to talk. Usually it follows up with, so what do you do? (If it's a friend you want, you'll probably ask; if it's at a conference, the prof is bound to ask). True, this usually always lead you to talk about your research, but hey this is the best practice to get your "elevator talk" down. Besides, if you meet someone who is truly interested in your research you have definitely made a new friend/colleague! I mean...people that actually care about your research? It's a miracle! (at least, that's how it feels sometimes..heh). 

 

But, as St. Andrews Lynx says, it should morph to dialogue after that. In my experience, confidence and a smile seems to take you far regardless of the situation. 

Edited April 3, 2014 by DigDeep

[gingin6789]

Talking about the weather to a meteorologist, however, will get you a few solid hours of conversation in at least!

I usually bring wherever myself and the other person are into the conversation. At a party: "so where did you meet Judy?" at a conference: "so, how was the journey here?" on the first day of class: "I'm really excited for this Philosophy of Bacon course!"

Philosophy of bacon is a made-up class because I'm hungry.

[DigDeep(inactive)]

Talking about the weather to a meteorologist, however, will get you a few solid hours of conversation in at least

 

Touché. In that case, I would bring up the wind map! http://hint.fm/wind/

[ExponentialDecay]

join okcupid. teaches you this stuff right quick.

[gingin6789]

Touché. In that case, I would bring up the wind map! http://hint.fm/wind/

oh my goodness, the wind map!!! <3 My boyfriend showed me that before (he's a meteorologist), and I'm so endlessly fascinated by it ... 

[FestivusMiracle]

'Nice set of hooters you got there.'

Only appropriate when at a dinner involving endangered owls. But if she gets the joke, you know you've got a winner since she obviously has good taste in movies.

[starofdawn]

'Nice set of hooters you got there.'

Only appropriate when at a dinner involving endangered owls. But if she gets the joke, you know you've got a winner since she obviously has good taste in movies.

 

[dstock]

I like the idea of compliments but I try to use this sparingly, only if something is actually worth complimenting (not fake or superficial). 

 

I like talking about something that is going on around us... like if at an academic thing, "what did you think of the talk?" or talking about the food or something.

 

Hopefully after the above 2 possibilities a conversation has started.... then you can talk about yourself and ask them what they do, etc.  (warning, "what do you do" can be awkward if they are unemployed) 

 

If I'm going to an event I try to have a couple of topics up my sleeve.  Like, I can think about mentioning a new restaurant I've tried or place I went around town.  I won't force the topic on anyone - but in the case it comes up naturally...idk helps me to pre-plan so I don't stand there silently trying to figure out what to say next haha.

[spellbanisher]

I don't talk to people. Maybe I should try it.

Edited April 7, 2014 by spellbanisher

[bakalamba]

I found out recently that my icebreakers completely rely on living near a University with many international graduate students. "Are you from around here? You're not? You're from X? What's it like there? Do you like living here? What's different? I hear Y about country X, is that true?" Conversation started.

 

It fails with the local crowd. "Are you from around here? Yes? Ok."