2015 Rejections

[lazaria]

Guess this is an appropriate place to post: I got my first rejection from a journal publication I sent out late last year. I kinda knew it was coming but it came at a bad time I think. I feel completely demotivated for everything and even unsure if I can hack it in a Ph.D. program.

 

On the plus side, it's made me less eager to refresh and check the results board/email :/

 

I'm so sorry to hear this.

 

Know that you are in good company and that a journal rejection + not getting into some PhD programs does not mean anything about you personally (as others have eloquently stated on this thread before me).

If it's any consolation, I was bemoaning my less-than-awesome season to a friend of mine who is a TT professor in a different field. He told me to appreciate it for the strength it will build in me because, in academe, there's a lot of rejection, and it happens fairly often to everybody. He said the everyone is frequently being denied grants, fellowships, publications, jobs, etc. etc. He said you just learn to keep marketing yourself and enjoy the ride. And, the quicker you get that thick skin, the easier it will be on you.  

 

TBH, I have had some existential questions of my own during this season. I decided to shelve an old research project and found a new one that gave me some inspiration and momentum. It's helped me feel like I've got a path, even if that path, right now, does not include a Ph.D. program. 

 

Also, this article is excellent: http://chronicle.com/article/Traits-of-the-Get-It-Done/133291/

[1Q84]

Ugh, that sucks. This is the Milton one?

 

In re being "unsure if you can hack it in a PhD program": rejections aren't dispositive; people get rejected for all sorts of reasons that have nothing to due with their abilities or whether or not they're suited to graduate studies. Acceptances and wait lists (since you don't wait list someone you don't want to attend), though, are.

 

You may be unsure, and I don't mean to downplay the very real self-doubt that can plague us all, but both UCR and USC not only think you can hack it--they want you to hack it with them.

 

 

I'm so sorry to hear this.

 

Know that you are in good company and that a journal rejection + not getting into some PhD programs does not mean anything about you personally (as others have eloquently stated on this thread before me).

If it's any consolation, I was bemoaning my less-than-awesome season to a friend of mine who is a TT professor in a different field. He told me to appreciate it for the strength it will build in me because, in academe, there's a lot of rejection, and it happens fairly often to everybody. He said the everyone is frequently being denied grants, fellowships, publications, jobs, etc. etc. He said you just learn to keep marketing yourself and enjoy the ride. And, the quicker you get that thick skin, the easier it will be on you.  

 

TBH, I have had some existential questions of my own during this season. I decided to shelve an old research project and found a new one that gave me some inspiration and momentum. It's helped me feel like I've got a path, even if that path, right now, does not include a Ph.D. program. 

 

Also, this article is excellent: http://chronicle.com/article/Traits-of-the-Get-It-Done/133291/

 

Thanks for the kind words, y'all. It's the top journal in Milton studies, yes, and typically only publishes doctorate holders so I'm not quite sure what I was thinking submitting there and hoping for an acceptance! The rock star editor had very kind words, though, and said that both readers endorsed and were excited by the general idea behind my paper, which was slightly comforting. On the other hand, it was distinctly not a "revise and resubmit," which hurts.

 

You guys are right about rejections not defining me as a candidate but it definitely shook my world view up a bit (and still currently is a bit). Definitely a good chance to grow a thicker skin. That said, I'm still going to stick the (extensive) reader's notes in a drawer somewhere and give myself time to cry into a tub of ice cream.

[kurayamino]

That said, I'm still going to stick the (extensive) reader's notes in a drawer somewhere and give myself time to cry into a tub of ice cream.

 

Sorry about the rejection, but I'm going to concentrate on this part and say that, extensive reader notes to me signal someone is invested in making your research better and stronger because they believe you have the potential to do the work it needs. That said, take some time to breathe and cry a little bit, and when you return to your work I'm sure you'll see it doesn't sting as bad as it does now.

[InHacSpeVivo]

Same here, mollifiedmolloy! I have essays to grade, and I'm on GC instead. 

 

I may or may not be equally guilty of this.

 

Guess this is an appropriate place to post: I got my first rejection from a journal publication I sent out late last year. I kinda knew it was coming but it came at a bad time I think. I feel completely demotivated for everything and even unsure if I can hack it in a Ph.D. program.

 

On the plus side, it's made me less eager to refresh and check the results board/email :/

 

I must echo everything lazaria and kurayamino say. As a former academic editor (and as I always tell my students), a lot of feedback is much better than none; the better something is, the more there is to say about it! Plus, this is feedback from rockstar scholars, which can only improve your final product.

 

Honestly, journal acceptances are as much a crapshoot as PhD apps. The paper I used for my last app cycle got me in to 0/11 programs was accepted at a high quality journal on the first try. Meanwhile, a paper I just had rejected (not even a revise/resubmit!) is the same I used for MSU, to which I was accepted. Despite their sting, this is precisely why I never equate rejection with scholarly potential.

Edited February 17, 2015 by InHacSpeVivo

[Dr. Old Bill]

You guys are right about rejections not defining me as a candidate but it definitely shook my world view up a bit (and still currently is a bit). Definitely a good chance to grow a thicker skin. That said, I'm still going to stick the (extensive) reader's notes in a drawer somewhere and give myself time to cry into a tub of ice cream.

 

*hug*

 

 

 

For what it's worth (probably not much), when I first got into the cycle of sending my poetry out close to a decade ago, I received a lot of rejections. I had a large body of work built up, so when I decided to finally do it, I went at it pretty hard. Most poetry publications wanted you to send 3-5 poems in a submission...so I had a master list of which poems were going where, and every weekend I would pick a few out, write a cover letter, and send those poems off to a publisher...maybe six or seven different submissions per week (this was before online / email submissions became the norm). After a couple of months, I started getting responses. I had the fortune / misfortune of having a mail slot in my apartment door at the time, so I would get home from work, open the door, see my own handwriting on an envelope (SASEs!), and have the moment of hope while I tore it open...only to see a form rejection slip tucked inside...usually with the poems I sent included (sans comments), as if they didn't even want their garbage cans to be tainted with my verses.

 

This became a daily and weekly ritual. I'd open the door, get a rejection, then effectively "recycle" those poems into another submission on the weekend. I started filling up a shoebox with my rejections. That shoebox became a dresser drawer. Then finally, I got an acceptance! The same poem that had been sent to a few other places, but finally someone wanted to publish it! Then eventually I received more. And more. And more and more and more. I was firmly in a cycle by this point, and it was truly anyone's guess as to which publications would take my poems and which would reject them. Sometimes I sent out what I considered "mediocre" work that happened to fit a theme, and sometimes I sent out what I considered to be "excellent" work to publications I figured would be shoo-ins to print it. There was just no predicting what would strike an editor's fancy and what wouldn't.

 

The moral of the story is this: I have a box full of at least 200 SASEs containing rejected poems and rejection slips. Beside it, I have another box full of acceptances, contributor copies, and even a few receipts for checks, paying me for my work, if you can believe that. It just becomes a cycle, and at some point you start to take rejection in stride...because you realize it's just business, and that you really have no clue what's going to pique an editor's interest.

 

Some of what I consider to be my "best" poems remain unpublished, while a fairly large number of what I consider to be "inferior" work exists in journals with print runs exceeding 1000 (and in at least one case, exceeding 20,000). I recognize that it is different for academic publications, just as it is different for grad school applications...but fundamentally it is the same: an impersonal process that doesn't address the core of who you are.

 

You're going to have some great work published in the coming years. Before that, you're going to have some great work rejected. Keep those rejections and cherish them -- not in any malicious way, but as a reminder that good work can be turned down by good people, and it doesn't reflect on you OR them.

Edited February 17, 2015 by Wyatt's Torch

[1Q84]

Sorry about the rejection, but I'm going to concentrate on this part and say that, extensive reader notes to me signal someone is invested in making your research better and stronger because they believe you have the potential to do the work it needs. That said, take some time to breathe and cry a little bit, and when you return to your work I'm sure you'll see it doesn't sting as bad as it does now.

 

I must echo everything lazaria and kurayamino say. As a former academic editor (and as I always tell my students), a lot of feedback is much better than none; the better something is, the more there is to say about it! Plus, this is feedback from rockstar scholars, which can only improve your final product.

 

Honestly, journal acceptances are as much a crapshoot as PhD apps. The paper I used for my last app cycle got me in to 0/11 programs was accepted at a high quality journal on the first try. Meanwhile, a paper I just had rejected (not even a revise/resubmit!) is the same I used for MSU, to which I was accepted. Despite their sting, this is precisely why I never equate rejection with scholarly potential.

 

Thanks, you two! That's a good way of looking at it. I'm certainly glad it wasn't just an email in 60pt font saying NO.

 

*hug*

 

 

For what it's worth (probably not much), when I first got into the cycle of sending my poetry out close to a decade ago, I received a lot of rejections. I had a large body of work built up, so when I decided to finally do it, I went at it pretty hard. Most poetry publications wanted you to send 3-5 poems in a submission...so I had a master list of which poems were going where, and every weekend I would pick a few out, write a cover letter, and send those poems off to a publisher...maybe six or seven different submissions per week (this was before online / email submissions became the norm). After a couple of months, I started getting responses. I had the fortune / misfortune of having a mail slot in my apartment door at the time, so I would get home from work, open the door, see my own handwriting on an envelope (SASEs!), and have the moment of hope while I tore it open...only to see a form rejection slip tucked inside...usually with the poems I sent included (sans comments), as if they didn't even want their garbage cans to be tainted with my verses.

 

This became a daily and weekly ritual. I'd open the door, get a rejection, then effectively "recycle" those poems into another submission on the weekend. I started filling up a shoebox with my rejections. That shoebox became a dresser drawer. Then finally, I got an acceptance! The same poem that had been sent to a few other places, but finally someone wanted to publish it! Then eventually I received more. And more. And more and more and more. I was firmly in a cycle by this point, and it was truly anyone's guess as to which publications would take my poems and which would reject them. Sometimes I sent out what I considered "mediocre" work that happened to fit a theme, and sometimes I sent out what I considered to be "excellent" work to publications I figured would be shoo-ins to print it. There was just no predicting what would strike an editor's fancy and what wouldn't.

 

The moral of the story is this: I have a box full of at least 200 SASEs containing rejected poems and rejection slips. Beside it, I have another box full of acceptances, contributor copies, and even a few receipts for checks, paying me for my work, if you can believe that. It just becomes a cycle, and at some point you start to take rejection in stride...because you realize it's just business, and that you really have no clue what's going to pique an editor's interest.

 

Some of what I consider to be my "best" poems remain unpublished, while a fairly large number of what I consider to be "inferior" work exists in journals with print runs exceeding 1000 (and in at least one case, exceeding 20,000). I recognize that it is different for academic publications, just as it is different for grad school applications...but fundamentally it is the same: an impersonal process that doesn't address the core of who you are.

 

You're going to have some great work published in the coming years. Before that, you're going to have some great work rejected. Keep those rejections and cherish them -- not in any malicious way, but as a reminder that good work can be turned down by good people, and it doesn't reflect on you OR them.

 

Wow, thank you, Wyatt for the personal story (and reminder of a time when SASEs were a thing)! Your perseverance certainly puts my one measly rejection into perspective. I think I'll take up your idea and start a box. It might be nice to look back on it in the future with a rueful smile!

[Katla]

You're going to have some great work published in the coming years. Before that, you're going to have some great work rejected. Keep those rejections and cherish them -- not in any malicious way, but as a reminder that good work can be turned down by good people, and it doesn't reflect on you OR them.

 

Very wise words WT!

 

 

I'm sorry about the publication rejection 1Q84! Tight hugs! There's nothing like rejections to make you doubt yourself and your work, but as everybody else have said, rejections don't say anything about your scholastic or personal abilities. I hope you allow yourself time to mourn with your tub of ice cream but don't leave the reader's notes in the drawer forever!

[__________________________]

Thanks; that does help. My issue is that I had some health and personal issues going on last semester and a courseload where I overextended myself, so I didn't do as well as I wanted -- that was my "coasting" semester. I'd really like to end this term on high a note as possible. 

 

Yeah, if you can afford to, it's worth it to take a lighter course load in your senior year.  For me, it made it easier to give more attention to each class and to focus on writing my honors thesis -- and even then, I was so busy that a full course load AND applying to grad schools would have driven me nuts.  I definitely advise to give yourself a little break if you can.  I'm a workaholic who tends to overextend myself -- if you're anything like me, giving yourself even the slightest break can go a long way.  Especially when you have health and/or personal issues.  Feel free to PM me if you ever need help or to vent to a relatively anonymous stranger.  Colleges/universities can sometimes be shitty at understanding that most of their students are adults with real issues and lives outside of their studies rather than overgrown children trying to put off "real life."

 

 

Same here, mollifiedmolloy! I have essays to grade, and I'm on GC instead. 

 

I know right??  I'm terrible about this.  I justify it to myself all the time though -- "I'm a temporary teacher who is underpaid and doing most of my work off the clock.  Damned kids can wait."  I'm a monster.  Worst teacher.  

 

And 1Q84 -- don't sweat the small stuff!  You have an acceptance and a pretty promising looking waitlist!  One rejection from a premier journal, when you already were "lower on the totem pole" than the average contributor isn't the end of the world.  I've never submitted to an academic journal, but I have to poetry journals -- getting told that people though it was interesting in its ideas is far better than getting told that your work doesn't have a place in the journal's "vision" or whatever.  At least it shows your on the right track and that people were interested enough to read the whole thing.

[Dr. Old Bill]

Officially received the Brown rejection. Always more of a relief to turn an "implied" into an "official" rejection.

 

*exhale*

[Ramus]

Officially received the Brown rejection. Always more of a relief to turn an "implied" into an "official" rejection.

 

*exhale*

 

Me too. I imagine this is the week that a lot of our 'implied's are converted. 

[InHacSpeVivo]

Me too. I imagine this is the week that a lot of our 'implied's are converted. 

 

I certainly hope so!

[youngcharlie101]

Rejected from Columbia and Brown. Not looking so good this year.

[InHacSpeVivo]

I cannot even imagine: http://time.com/3712677/carnegie-mellon-admission-mistake/

[Dr. Old Bill]

I cannot even imagine: http://time.com/3712677/carnegie-mellon-admission-mistake/

 

Yeah, I just read that too!

 

Now if only someone would revoke one of my rejections...

[kurayamino]

I cannot even imagine: http://time.com/3712677/carnegie-mellon-admission-mistake/

I had seen some of that popping up on the results page and I was cringing the entire time. I can't even imagine how horrible that would make me feel.

[lazaria]

 

Now if only someone would revoke one of my rejections...

 

^^THIS.

[mmmscience]

I cannot even imagine: http://time.com/3712677/carnegie-mellon-admission-mistake/

 

I for one am flabbergasted that 1200 people applied to an MS program! Is that like the top program in field? Ug, what a nightmare for them!

[lazaria]

I had a similar reaction. It made me feel slightly less daunted by our programs' avg. numbers. 

[bgt28]

I'm in so much pain. I don't think I can do this anymore.

[hreaðemus]

I'm in so much pain. I don't think I can do this anymore.

 

Oh gosh - hey now! Hang in there. *hugs* I know it's torturous. And maybe it would help to step away from all this, if you're overwhelmed - take a walk, watch a movie, cuddle a friend. Breathe. (I made rune cookies tonight! I'd share if I could.) But either way, you ARE doing it - and you're doing great! My mom says that the worst thing we can do to ourselves is to stop showing up, and so I always tell myself: one foot in front of the other. That's all we can do.

 

I hope things feel better for you in the morning... take care of yourself! You deserve it now more than ever, just for getting this far.

[jhefflol]

I've been keeping up with the extreme cold weather on the east coast in an attempt to convince myself that I actually don't want to live in an area where ice sheets fall off skyscrapers to convince myself that I'm not that sad that I probably won't be getting in to a program in the Boston area or in New York. It's working.

Excuse my syntax. I've had some wine

Edited February 18, 2015 by jhefflol

[1Q84]

I'm in so much pain. I don't think I can do this anymore.

 

<big hug> Hang in there. I know it may not seem bleak now but you have 5 more schools to hear from! 

[jhefflol]

I'm in so much pain. I don't think I can do this anymore.

No no no! You've got this! Even if you don't get in, you're still a wonderful person and are deserving of happiness.

[bgt28]

Thanks for your kind words guys. I'll be ok, I just need to feel as though I'm worthy of a grad school education regardless of admissions decisions. I'm just so tired and honestly exhausted by keeping positive. Perhaps a few days away from the Internet might help.

[Dr. Old Bill]

Thanks for your kind words guys. I'll be ok, I just need to feel as though I'm worthy of a grad school education regardless of admissions decisions. I'm just so tired and honestly exhausted by keeping positive. Perhaps a few days away from the Internet might help.

 

You most likely are! That's perhaps the single worst thing about this process: a large number of worthy people are invariably turned away.

 

It's so hard to not take it personally, especially when what is being rejected comes down to how you did on standardized tests and in college, how you put forth your interests and abilities in your SOP, and the topic you chose to write about (and how well you wrote it) in your WS.

 

But the reality is that' it's not personal. Not in the least. It's always worth remembering that there are large numbers of people who are not better than you in any categorical way (other than in a basic quantitative sense, perhaps), and are in the exact same boat. Even if you cut away 1/2 to 2/3 of the candidates for various reasons, the percentages of acceptances generally remain low. There are generally a few "surefire" candidates with impeccable scores, GPA, publications, conferences, LORs, a can't-miss WS or SOP etc., leaving maybe five or six slots open for potentially hundreds of otherwise qualified applicants. At that point, it becomes like a lottery. Statistics aside, if each program is picking six balls out of 100, and you've applied to a dozen or so programs, you're still one in 100 at each one.

 

Perhaps there are elements of your application that can be improved, and if you do get shut out, you'll be wise to consult as many people as possible about your various application elements (hint: start with GC, but go way beyond). But in general, there's probably at least some solace in knowing that most of it is not about you, and it's no more personal than it is for ball 37, 39, 26 etc.

 

 

Keep your chin up!