Anxious Nervous Scared About Starting Grad School

[MarriageFamilyTherapy]

Hello everyone. I have been away from school for the past 14 months. 

 

In one week, I will begin a Master's program in Marriage and Family Therapy. 

 

I have one prior grad school experience: I did 2 years in graduate school (theology), but I never finished. 

 

I am very anxious/nervous/scared about going back to grad school. 

 

I suffer from anxiety disorder/panic attacks and depression...

 

Is anyone else anxious/nervous/scared about grad school studies? 

 

Does anyone else struggle with mental health issues? (anxiety or depression)

[Jay's Brain]

Hey! Fellow incoming student here! I graduated from my undergraduate program in June 2014, and have not been in school since then (although I HAVE been working in an academic setting the entire time) so I completely see why you would be worried! 

This month has been a bit jittery for me too. On one hand I'm excited about what's to come; on the other, the anticipation of starting something brand new and heading down a more specific path is pretty daunting. 

 

I know that I'm not in the same particular situation as you are, balancing a new school term with personal issues, but just remember that everyone around you is, and will be, a great supportive system! Regardless of how things looks, you've made it into a program that you hand selected and it will be a great experience! The ups and downs will come, but in the end things will work out. Life has a way of going topsy-turvy before it settles for each of us. We just have to experience the roller coaster ride quite a few times first!

 

Any current grad students or other incoming students with more sound wisdom and advice that want to chime in?

[RDV_neuro]

I won't go into too much detail, but I have a history with mood disorders too. I used to be a school teacher, and went to grad school to change careers because I was having daily panic attacks in my classroom. So I'm sensitive to that sort of thing too. I worked for 2 years between my finishing bachelors degree and starting my MS program. I'm in my second year in an MS psychology program and plan to get a PhD in neuroscience.

When I entered my program I was freaking terrified. I had a bad case of impostor syndrome ("I don't belong here! As soon as they figure out that I'm an idiot they'll be kicking me out!") for almost the whole first year. That problem has just started to back off, and now I'm anxious about applying to PhD programs, getting my thesis on track, and attending SfN for the first time (big, scary, expensive conference). So I'm not going to lie to you: grad school is hard, it's a lot of work, a lot of deadlines, a lot of pressure.

But here's the thing...

EVERYONE is anxious.

Anxiety, at least for me, ends up being a feedback loop: I'm anxious because there is a lot on my plate, and then I have the false perception that everyone around me is handling the workload better than I am. The perception that no one else is anxious about their workload except for me causes me more anxiety... and it spirals. I end up feeling stupid, unproductive, unprepared, and just generally like crap.

Talking to other people in my program about their workload, how they handle it, and where they are in the process of preparing applications and writing their theses makes me feel so much better, because they are all just as worried as I am. That stops the feedback loop in it's tracks: I'll still be anxious about my work, but it can't spiral down into negative self-talk because I know my anxiety level is average, and so it can't make me any less effective or less intelligent or less productive than the rest of my cohort.

So my advice is to make some friends in your program and schedule time to drink beer and bitch about it. It is more than likely you'll find out that everyone you know (except that one overachieving person who brags about how on top of shit they are- and screw that person, okay?) is having a lot of the same feelings you are, and that might make you feel a lot better about it.

If you think your anxiety level might end up in the unhealthy range, why not start building a relationship with a therapist now so that they are familiar and trusted when you need them later?

 

 

[MissBoopity]

Hi everyone,

I also am anxious, nervous, scared, but I am also so excited to be starting law school in a few weeks. It has been a dream of mine since I was very young. I have had a very tumultuous journey getting here, but what I can say that I hope will help is to always try to turn your ANXIETY into INTENSITY. I came across this phrase while studying for my LSAT, and in the many hours leading up to testing as well as during my exam, I calmed myself, told myself that I was well-prepared, that I earned this and am just fulfilling what I have always been meant to do. Just relax, if it fits, then, all you have to do is give it what you've got. I hope this helps. Focus on the mantra and feel all of your feelings thoroughly, but then just like when you run as fast as you can (running with empowering music definitely helps me too), imagine yourself turning that anxiety into intensity. When I start feeling nervous and stressed, I just imagine the montage of Elle Woods with all of her books, studying while she power-walks lol. 

 

Best of luck to everyone,

Miss Boopity

[Adelaide9216]

I'm also very anxious but I have a feeling that most people in graduate school will feel this way. It's just that not everyone will show it.

[Sherrinford]

1 hour ago, Adelaide9216 said:

I'm also very anxious but I have a feeling that most people in graduate school will feel this way. It's just that not everyone will show it.

The 6th year doctoral students in my program feel the same anxiety. "Impostor syndrome" is unfortunately something common in research and academia in psych, largely due to the competitive and scholarly requirements of grad programs.

But chances are you've already faced (or are facing) your demons in order to pursue your passion. Remind yourself of the progress you've already made, rather than getting disoriented by how far you have left to go. It's the little victories and milestones that give you the strength to keep going. A regular system of self-care such as therapy, exercise, friends/family, and Twilight Zone reruns will go a long way in buffering you against the stressors of the program.

Finally, don't be afraid to ask for help. You of all people (a student of psychology/social work) should understand the importance of taking care of yourself!

[Adelaide9216]

11 minutes ago, Sherrinford said:

The 6th year doctoral students in my program feel the same anxiety. "Impostor syndrome" is unfortunately something common in research and academia in psych, largely due to the competitive and scholarly requirements of grad programs.

But chances are you've already faced (or are facing) your demons in order to pursue your passion. Remind yourself of the progress you've already made, rather than getting disoriented by how far you have left to go. It's the little victories and milestones that give you the strength to keep going. A regular system of self-care such as therapy, exercise, friends/family, and Twilight Zone reruns will go a long way in buffering you against the stressors of the program.

Finally, don't be afraid to ask for help. You of all people (a student of psychology/social work) should understand the importance of taking care of yourself!

Yes, absolutely. I am planning on joining a walking club in my hometown. I am very fortunate, there are a lot of beautiful green spaces near where I live. I am also planning on taking a 10 classes hot yoga membership so I can do a class whenever I feel more anxious or stressed. These are strategies that I've tried before, and that were good to me, and I am trying to put them back into place in my life.

[Le Chat]

Since you are studying therapy, might I suggest a technique to reduce anxiety that I use and really helps? I use visualization when beginning something new, which helps me connect future situations with current. If you are anxious/having panic attacks about a specific situation, it might help! 

[bf1964]

I'm so glad I found this topic. I start grad school on Thursday, and I have a knot the size of a boulder in my stomach.  I'm not sure what I'm afraid of - flunking, looking stupid, having a professor tell me I'm a blithering idiot with no business in college - the usual "oh my God what if" scenarios. The thing is most what-if scenarios never happen, and I know that, but I still feel anxious.  Also,I'm not a traditional student -  I'll be 53 on Friday the 1st, and the refrain "you're too damned old for this" keeps ringing in my head.   I guess a little worry is a good thing - it'll keep me alert and focused.  

[cowgirlsdontcry]

Everyone who is an incoming grad student is anxious/nervous. I found the orientation terrific, but intimidating because EVERYTHING from the syllabus to lesson plans was completely different from my MA school. Once I got that in order, I was better. I have taught my 2 classes 3x now and getting in the groove with my students. I have also attended my classes once and think they will be great. So it does get better.

Edited August 29, 2017 by cowgirlsdontcry

[8BitJourney]

It's hella stressful! I start next week and I feel like a complete fraud. But i I know imposter syndrome is particularly strong when you first start and when you're about to end grad school so  don't worry

[ellieotter]

Guys I'm in my first full week of doc classes and seriously in the middle of theories the "holy shit I'm actually getting my PhD, this is actually happening" hit me like a ton of bricks. The impostor syndrome is strong yall

[Adelaide9216]

I have to miss class in October, and I hesitate to email my professors now about it. I am starting class next week. I don't know if they'll think I'm weird for contacting them now. I'm just anxious because I don't know if there are exams or assignments during the week I'll be away from campus.

 

EDITED : I sent them. I will come across as weird but anyway. 

 

 

Also this fall is going to be so busy. I have a lot of extracurricular activities this term and I hope I will be able to make it through. I've always been able to manage workload pressures because I have always been involved in my community despite going to school, but this semester is going to be quite intense. 

Edited August 30, 2017 by Adelaide9216

[Adelaide9216]

11 hours ago, bf1964 said:

I'm so glad I found this topic. I start grad school on Thursday, and I have a knot the size of a boulder in my stomach.  I'm not sure what I'm afraid of - flunking, looking stupid, having a professor tell me I'm a blithering idiot with no business in college - the usual "oh my God what if" scenarios. The thing is most what-if scenarios never happen, and I know that, but I still feel anxious.  Also,I'm not a traditional student -  I'll be 53 on Friday the 1st, and the refrain "you're too damned old for this" keeps ringing in my head.   I guess a little worry is a good thing - it'll keep me alert and focused.  

You're not too old for this. You're actually respecting yourself, your values, your interests and your life goals by going back to school to study something that you love despite your age. I respect you for that choice. In my opinion, it takes a lot of courage to follow one's heart to pursue our true goals in life.

[Islamahmed]

I'm also very glad I found this thread! I start next Wednesday and, surprisingly, I'm not feeling very nervous, but I am feeling a little intimidated because I don't entirely know what to expect. But, I'm also very excited for orientation next week!

[Adelaide9216]

I met with my class colleagues yesterday and everyone is very friendly.