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For everyone worried they won't get in...


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Posted

...please, please know that it is not the end of the world even if that does happen.

I am the who everyone thought would get in the first time and didn't after being wait listed at two programs. I got a job in my field and reapplied 2 years later, and same deal - wait list but no acceptance. It was crushing. I was mortified that I'd had to ask my mentors for letters twice and still hadn't gotten in. My family was supportive but obviously shared my disappointment. It sucked, I wanted to crawl in a hole and die for a few weeks after, but I picked myself up eventually and moved on.

I worked on publishing data. I was able to expand my skill set at my job, and pick up another mentor in the process. I applied again, this time to three times as many programs, of course spending three times as much money. I had to get special permission from one program to apply for a third time which made me feel like a big loser. I braced myself for not getting in anywhere and possibly changing careers.

Yesterday one of my programs emailed me. As I read the subject line my stomach dropped: my first rejection, here we go again.

And I was wrong. It was an acceptance with full funding from a school I'd visited and loved.

I got to do the jumping around screaming happy dance and got to hear how excited my parents were when I called to let them know. And I've gotten to re live the excitement every time I tell another co worker, friend, or family member *especially* the ones who know my history and how hard I've worked.

And the amount of satisfaction and relief I've felt in the past 36 hours outweighs the three YEARS where I was either applying or in between application periods, wondering if I was ever going to make it in my field. Wondering why I had such crap luck, applying last year as the economy fell apart, constantly wait listed but never chosen.

So whatever happens for you this year...if it's your first, second, third, fourth round or greater, just remember that it does not make you a loser, it is not a reason to give up, and if you keep at it it WILL happen for you.

Posted

Thank-you for this post. It seems you really deserve this acceptance and it just goes to show perseverance does pay off. rolleyes.gif

Posted

I donĀ“t post much (at all!) but I felt the need to THANK YOU for this one! I was rejected from the one program that I applied to last year and am worried about another rejection this year. Only time will tell.... Anyways, thanks! I needed this post!

Posted

it really made me feel much better.

I wasn't worried of the fact that I wont get in anywhere.

I was worried that I wont get the spirit/energy to work on it another time. everyone dreams - but not everyone's dream come true.

one who can take the failure :) survives.

Kudos comrade !!!

Posted

Wow! That's so inspiring! Good job and way to show these programs what a mistake they had made earlier! I'm sure because of this "trial by fire" you're going to end up being more hard-working and successful than they are, :D !

Posted

What happens to you get rejected from everywhere and then can't get a job? Thats what I'm worried is going to happen to me. I feel like I'm really not worth anything to employers with just a B.A. and I can't afford to work a minimum wage job and continue living off my parents for another year or possibly more if I can't get in. That is my real fear.

Posted

thanks LadL :)

Congrats on your acceptance! and for having the guts to go at it a third time. That takes strength, which will come in very handy when you're slugging through your phd :)

I'm lucky that I have a stable job (albeit completely unrelated to any of my intellectual pursuits) that I can coast at for another year if I need to re-apply again. My only worry is that I'm 27 and will be 28 next year. I worry that older applicants are frowned upon, and that longer I am out of school the more I will forget what it's like to be in that space.

I know many people who are 2 and 3 years ahead of my in their grad pursuits, some are already writing their dissertations. I feel left behind and lame for having tooled around for so many years before realizing that academia was where I needed to be. Silly me, I had faith in the real world. But the real world has been handing me my ass in a hand basket with a label marked express delivery to hell.

Anyway, thank you again for your perspective. It is *very* much appreciate in this crazy moment.

Posted

What happens to you get rejected from everywhere and then can't get a job? Thats what I'm worried is going to happen to me. I feel like I'm really not worth anything to employers with just a B.A. and I can't afford to work a minimum wage job and continue living off my parents for another year or possibly more if I can't get in. That is my real fear.

Ditto... this is my biggest fear. I can handle toiling through the admissions process again. I won't be too ashamed to ask for LOR again, and I could stand to improve my GRE scores and change the angle on my SOP. I'd probably be able to further narrow my research interests. But finding a job in this market? And with fairly limited experience? Earlier this year I applied for 27 different jobs in my field, and didn't get a single one. Every one was the same story- hundreds of applicants for a single position. I was lucky to find the short-term job I did. :unsure:

But, not to stray too far off-topic. This is indeed an inspirational story, and it's nice to hear that hard work does pay off. Congratulations!

Posted

What happens to you get rejected from everywhere and then can't get a job? Thats what I'm worried is going to happen to me. I feel like I'm really not worth anything to employers with just a B.A. and I can't afford to work a minimum wage job and continue living off my parents for another year or possibly more if I can't get in. That is my real fear.

Ditto... this is my biggest fear. I can handle toiling through the admissions process again. I won't be too ashamed to ask for LOR again, and I could stand to improve my GRE scores and change the angle on my SOP. I'd probably be able to further narrow my research interests. But finding a job in this market? And with fairly limited experience? Earlier this year I applied for 27 different jobs in my field, and didn't get a single one. Every one was the same story- hundreds of applicants for a single position. I was lucky to find the short-term job I did. :unsure:

But, not to stray too far off-topic. This is indeed an inspirational story, and it's nice to hear that hard work does pay off. Congratulations!

Trust me, you guys, I know how you feel.

BUT - there are ways around it. Have you thought about teaching? A lot of private schools are willing to take people straight out of their BA to teach in their field. It can also help on your apps for next year. I know the economy is tough... but we're smart people (after all, we're applying to grad school!!) and should be able to work out a plan B. Teach English overseas, sign up and do work with Non-Profits. And even if you ARE relegated to working minimum wage, find other stuff that you can volunteer for in the area. Hey - why not try and sell an Ecology Education seminar at the schools in your local area? It's a hot topic, they may appreciate it! Also - take some classes that can help you fill in the gaps you need for grad school, even if part-time and in a non-grad track. It'll keep your mind sharp, and it may open up some unexplored opportunities.

The important thing is to try and be as positive as possible. The economy isn't much better in Israel, and I've been unemployed for a year and a half barring some freelance work... only now do I have any proper leads for a Tech writing job, and meanwhile I AM working at a minimum wage crap job, and still I know that somehow I'll find what to do until next year. I decided it's even a good thing, since meanwhile I can take Latin classes and beef up my languages.

Posted

Congrats, you really deserve it!

Brings this quote to mind -- "The brick walls are not there to keep us out. The brick walls are there to give us a chance to show how badly we want something. Because the brick walls are there to stop the people who donā€™t want it badly enough." - Randy Pausch

Posted

I'm glad you posted your inspiring story, LadyL. I'm probably going to get a -1 for this, because I get a -1 every time I post, but the negativity on this board is really staggering. So it is good to see someone saying try, try again and that it isn't the end of the world if you don't make it the first time. I admit I have been negative here at times. But now that rejections are pouring in and people are getting really upset if nothing good is happening to them, I just can't say anything negative to others. Maybe about my own situation, to poke fun at myself, but not about others. I'm really glad you're showing people that even through rejection, you can make yourself an even stronger candidate than if you had been accepted in the first round. We all need to remember that our worth as individuals is not dependent upon what some faceless admission committee decides. Let's not all focus on being rejected and try to remember why we're doing this in the first place.

(So go ahead, hit the -1 please, I'm waiting.)

Posted

That is a really inspiring story and something that was great to hear! Thank you for sharing, LadyL, and congrats on getting in! I worry about my chances all the time, but not getting in isn't the end of the world and I can always try again. It's nice to hear that it's worked out for someone. Thanks!

Posted

I got one rejection (i don't wanna say my first) a week ago. This post makes me feel everything is gonna be fine anyway. Thanks for writing, for sharing. Good luck with your new life.

Posted

What happens to you get rejected from everywhere and then can't get a job? Thats what I'm worried is going to happen to me. I feel like I'm really not worth anything to employers with just a B.A. and I can't afford to work a minimum wage job and continue living off my parents for another year or possibly more if I can't get in. That is my real fear.

I graduated with an MA from the #1 school in my field and was unemployed for a year so I temped. I got rejected from every internship, fellowship, teaching program, Peace Corps and all 15 PhD programs I applied to (for the 2nd year in a row). I had to move back with my parents. A year to the day after I graduated I finally got a temp to perm position doing something completly unrealted to my major. For the past two years I've been looking for jobs (applied to thousands) and applying to PhD programs (I applied to 15 this yea--my third year in a row-- and so far have 6 rejections). The job I have now is not enough for me to be on my own or even save--I break even each month. Basically life is hard. Everyone's situation is different though. I'm just warning you that it could be rough. Things will get better though. I think this economy is screwing things up for everyone. It will end and soon, things will get better you'll find your way and be stronger than ever after going through this.

Thanks to the original OP for the inspiring post. Good luck to all of you.

Posted

Congrats on your acceptance..it took real courage to apply a third time. Not sure if I'd have the strength to do so. I'm the one who everyone tells, don't worry you'll be fine but I've only had one interview offer. I know people who were accepted to programs without being interviewed and others with multiple interviews. I'm just going to try to do my best to nail this one in case its my only offer. If it doesn't work out then I guess it wasn't meant to be and find strength in your experience.

Posted

Congrats on your acceptance..it took real courage to apply a third time. Not sure if I'd have the strength to do so. I'm the one who everyone tells, don't worry you'll be fine but I've only had one interview offer. I know people who were accepted to programs without being interviewed and others with multiple interviews. I'm just going to try to do my best to nail this one in case its my only offer. If it doesn't work out then I guess it wasn't meant to be and find strength in your experience.

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