Tall Chai Latte

Your second rotation sounds just like one of my rotations. I also rotated with a PI who had really high expectations, who had really high expectations (e. g. experiments need to work no more than two tries, need to be super energetic) for rotation students. I wasn't meeting her standards of being 'interested' in her lab, and she gave me the lowest grade (and ratings in all five categories on the evaluations) for the rotations. The rotation was short and I worked seven days a week, and still got a horrible review and 'it's up to you whether you want to complete this rotation. I don't think my perspective will change". This had huge impact on my later rotation searches; I guess people didn't wanna deal with a potential problem child! Rotation periods are tough because you are politically not protected by anyone. If your second rotation eval doesn't affect your prospect on finding a permanent lab home, I'd say just let it go and move on. You might run into them some day, you might have to collaborate with them on your projects or borrow equipments/reagents etc. Just be courteous on this, smile and move on. Sometimes people just don't work well together, may it be personality or work ethics. Just like me and my ex-rotation advisor, she's a big extrovert and I'm an introvert. I guess she had a hard time reading me and interpreted things the wrong way.

Yep, SNPCracklePop summed it up nicely. I had quite a bit of trouble finding an advisor with funds for me. As a result, I had to compromise with an advisor (my current advisor) who wants to do something she has no expertise over, and yet where my skills could apply. It turned out that the projects were very challenging -- thus making my PhD harder than it needs to be. Although we have made progress, but my overall CV is less impressive than if easier projects were given to me or more support from within or outside of lab. It could be a difficult consequence to swallow.

The decisions you made early on have big impact on your career later. How lonely grad school can get, both emotionally and scientifically. Constantly being judged, and often taking blames for things you have no control over. Most professors have no interest in teaching and training students. No one will go to the bat for you unless there's benefit in doing so.

It wasn't easy for me. As someone who went to college in-state, being far away from home was the biggest challenge. I also lived in dorms (until my school kicked all upper classmen out) and went home once a week. It took me about a year to feel fully settled in to the new city, developing new hobbies... This is key! Also, learn how to cook I went with rooming with somebody during my first year. That way, you could learn things about the city quick. The only real furniture I bought was my desk from ikea, and bought the rest from the local ikea.

It's a personal choice. For me, the benefit of living alone outweighs rooming with someone. I also have two cats, with family visiting from time to time, thus having a place of my own is a much better option. It is more expensive, but my stipend is not that big anyway to make a difference in the amount of money I could save each month.

Before I got too busy/lazy, I used to go run in the gym when the going got tough and looking forward to my next road race. Sometimes I play video games on my iPad, read self-help books/leisure books, or just sit and do nothing like juilletmecredi. Other times I just keep on keeping on when there's no way to remove the external stress stimuli (like the stress won't go away unless I get the experiment working).

My own PhD experience so far says research + classes is easier than research only. What's difficult with year 3 and beyond is that your time becomes less structured and starts to blur together, but if you are still taking classes, there are some deadlines to keep track of. I was pretty lost for a while after passing candidacy- it was like "congratulations! you are now a PhD candidate! go for the degree!" without really a physical road map or guide. It is so easy to put on more workload than you could take and burn out.

I did contact a few people when I applied, but not to my current institution. I think it's good to ask if your POI has a space for grad student, but other than that, I doubt they have much to do with the admission process.

Love your doge taco! This is my fifth year in Ann Arbor. If anyone has any questions feel free to ask.

I've reviewed unpublished manuscripts for my PI before because she had too much on her plate. It's common around here, and nice training to see how to read critically of other people's work. As long as you follow ethics (keeping confidential information confidential, etc), it's actually fine.

I'm at the same stage as you in my program, also battling fading interest. I heard/read about various alternative careers over the years, and those opportunities sound much more attractive than the gloomy academia career. I thought about quitting many times throughout the years; I even attempted to leave my program but our program director convinced me to stick around. But true reason I'm still here is that there are plenty of resources at my institution for people who want to step away from the ivory tower: workshops, seminars, and career development groups. I would have no access to them once I cease being a student at this school. Maybe your institution is the same way? You could look into on-campus student groups or other opportunities to network or gain some volunteering experience related to the alternative career you interest in.

My mentor is the professor I worked for during undergrad. He was patient and never stingy about sharing his knowledge. This is the reason why I decided to pursue a PhD and potentially research as a lifelong career; the experience has been positive, and I took away a lot of valuable skills with me. Although I do largely different things now as a PhD student, I still use some of the old knowledge! I still stop by his office and say hi if I'm home for the holiday.

Your concern is legitimate. I agree with much of the consensus here that personality between you and your advisor should fit to a certain extend. While that is an important factor to consider, you also should look at how well the advisor's expertise fit your projects. I would try to find a good middle ground between personality and expertise. Some advisors are very ambitious and adventurous; they want to try all kinds of new ideas or break into a new field, but could not find the right person to work on those new projects. Pay attention to what kind of projects they are proposing to you, and whether that's something the PI's good at, or there's a more experienced person for help and advice. If you can get no help at all from your own lab, run away and look for another option. This is how my current lab is like. My advisor wants to do everything in her lab-- from structural biology to animal models- while her own training is in traditional molecular biology. I joined because the lab has been well funded (I was looking for a lab to stay in the midst of funding crisis a couple years back) and the proposed projects really appealed to me. It wasn't long before I realized that I could not get any help from my advisor and the lab, nor the help she promised to hook me up with. But I already over-committed to the lab, leaving would cause significant delay to my graduation. I switched projects 3-4 times and caused much unnecessary stress and frustration. I once read an article on the Chronicle of Higher Education on mentoring. The article concludes with the advice that "never choose an advisor who needs you more than you need him". The existing power imbalance could lead to exploitation, or something that feels like it.

Feeling lonely in grad school is a common thing across all disciplines. I moved from the east coast to midwest for grad school, and my first year at this very cold and snowy town was pretty miserable. I only made maybe one friend during my first year here! It definitely felt like I didn't belong, I guess people could tell I'm not a midwesterner. But after year two, things started to improve. I joined a lab and started interacting with a group of people on a daily basis. I also got to know their friends, and their friends of friends... Social circles expand over time. It was some time during my second year that I felt 'ok, I think I have a place here'. I understand how you feel, been there felt that... But it will pass.

Can anyone in the department help? I went through similar situation like you, with two labs didn't think I was a good fit, and the other two I didn't think I was a good fit for. So that was four mismatches in a roll. My problem stepped in to help me find a place to rotate, both me and my new lab home had to compromise in terms of research interest to make things work out in the end.