mk-8

But the grad program won’t break up with you 
As a single-for-ever individual I get that I’m a little cold-hearted, but in the end choosing one program over your top choice because it’s closer is not a good idea. If you applied to get into your dream program and it’s opening its arms to you, well... You wanted it, you got it, go for it!!

Yes. This so much. Not to derail this to a Myers Briggs discussion, but I'm an ENTP and this is definitely one of flaws. My mind is on to the next idea and the next question a little too soon.

It's not embarrassing. Hopefully once you get over the shock, you will realize that you have nothing to be ashamed of when it comes to applying to hella selective programs. I was saying this in another post: people (including us) don't realize how hard it is to get into these Ph.D's, even if they're in "universities," which makes them sound open and routine. You're in a competition with not only your capacities on trial, but also your compatibility with weird, diverse, secret circumstances that don't depend on your profile, but on the programs. --All this to say that you can't feel shame for not getting into something that's so hard to acquire in the first place.
Edit: I was going to use this image but wasn't quite sure of its relevance. Let's try.
So imagine you train for an ultramarathon, but you've never done one before and you've accumulated a few 10k and maybe a couple of marathons here and there. You're just a normal runner with good, solid experience, and you're throwing yourself into the ultramarathon across the Gobi desert. Well you think you can make it physically, and on the paper you're good. You even love the landscape and would be running with a few partners, some of whom you've met and others you haven't, but you know you'll get along well and will be amazing pieces in this horrible puzzle that is the race.
Well unfortunately, during the race, they didn't tell you that they were expecting a horde of hungry coyotes with rabies; there is storm and tents are ripped off and your helicopter can't make it anymore for your supplies at the next expected meeting point; suddenly the sand sinks into holes that try to suck you up; and your partners decide that they had a better opportunity somewhere else with a better scenery and more organized race, so they leave you without a warning although they knew while you were training that they won't be there.
Would you be ashamed of yourself as a runner for not making it to the end with such unexpected circumstances? I think not! That's how applications are. A sh* storm of surprises, and then you pick yourself up and plan your next races because you're awesome.

Okay... looking back over my SOP, and where I meant to type "British" I typed "Brititish." I just wish my typo didn't sound so dirty. 

Thank you! You make an excellent point about shoes. Flats it is!

I told myself that I was going to sleep in today to avoid the anxiety of waiting for Miami's portal to update (at 10:40am), but I woke up at 8:00am. Finally updated and I'm accepted!

This comes from another topic in which @CulturalCriminal said:
This is so true! It's so hard to practice self care in graduate school. After spending a long time on campus, it's hard to want to cook, work out, or do anything but drink a glass (or 2) of wine and eat McDonalds. So, questions for you all:
If you're already in grad school, how do you practice self care? If you aren't, how do you plan to practice self care? How will you keep yourself motivated? 

There's a pinned thread about visits and stuff, and I was freaking out about what to wear, too. Someone told me that it shouldn't stress me out that much because this is the the school's part to impress you. You've already been accepted.
I wore a skirt and a plain white shirt my first visit as an MA. Most people were in jeans and t-shirts (and even tank tops because the visit was in FL). You don't need to wear anything super fancy, I'd say. The most important thing is comfort. Recruitment events are likely to mean long days with a lot of walking (you'll probably go on a tour of the campus at some point). Wear comfortable shoes and something you'd be okay with wearing all day. I'm planning on wearing jeans and a blouse to most of my events along with my keds (lol). A suit may be overkill anyway, so don't worry about it. 

I feel you on this. My mom died my senior year when I was applying to MA programs. I would always talk to her about things and she would relay messages to my dad. After she died I had to basically start learning to communicate with him, because I realized we never really sat down and talked to each other much when I was growing up. My mom was really the glue to our family and when she died I think my dad let go of his identity as a dad and really fixated on his loss of my mom  and his identity as a widow (which I understand and realize he couldn't really control). But, much like your dad, I think he saw me leaving as just another aspect of us not being a family unit anymore.
It doesn't help that my family has not dealt with the death properly. My younger sister became severely depressed and dropped out of school. My dad became engaged and remarried within a few months. There was a lot of fighting and drama between my family and I was not there. Being far away and very occupied with school made me feel so helpless. Especially since I was being used as a proxy mediator in my mom's place. 
It's calmed down a lot in the past year, but I've mostly had to learn to navigate a different family than the one I grew up in. Whereas I wouldn't go 2 days without calling my mom, I go weeks with talking to my dad.  We don't talk about school much. Mostly small talk like the weather or my dog, sometimes I send him a picture of a meal I cooked or something funny I saw. Mostly though, I keep stuff to myself until it's necessary to share. Like my dad knows I'm applying to programs, but he hasn't asked which ones. I don't update him really on the process although I'll probably tell him when I travel for a visiting weekend. 
Whoops, realized I just spilled my life in there. But eh, it's already typed. Hope it let's everyone know, your not the only one who is dealing with grad school and family problems 

Thank you so much @fuzzylogician - that makes total sense now that I think about it. There's a lot that goes into the decisions that I'm sure I don't know/understand, so I can imagine why asking about future plans may not get me that far.
And thank you @TakeruK - your question about tenure rates and the department's plans is fantastic and I will ask it at every visit day. Also, I'll keep an eye out for profs who aren't meeting with students - while that's not foolproof, it's definitely a sign I hadn't though to look for. 

I just got my first acceptance! Virginia Tech's Rhetoric & Writing PhD!
 

Part of me wants to tell you to be quiet, but part of me recognizes that those visit days are really important if you are struggling to make a decision. 

Right? I feel like my advisor is friends with like 90% of these people anyway so I'm like.... pls be my friend too

I 100% have been doing the same with FB accounts lately. Some of them have some pretty lax privacy settings, she says in a way that is definitely NOT creepy. 

Congrats, y’all! I got the acceptance email for Iowa State’s RPC PhD program, too!

Congrats @maengret! I was accepted to Iowa State's RPC PhD!

Over the moon! Accepted at Iowa State's RCPC masters! Unofficial -- email says formal acceptance with TA offer is coming soon. 

If someone isn't friends with my advisor are they even worth knowing??

Right? I feel like my advisor is friends with like 90% of these people anyway so I'm like.... pls be my friend too

Congrats @maengret! I was accepted to Iowa State's RPC PhD!

Rhet/comp is such a small field- honestly ppl's facebook's pop up on my feed all the time anyways just from mutual friends at my current my program. First step, facebook stalking. Maybe one day I'll actually have the confidence to approach them in person. 

I 100% have been doing the same with FB accounts lately. Some of them have some pretty lax privacy settings, she says in a way that is definitely NOT creepy. 

I 100% have been doing the same with FB accounts lately. Some of them have some pretty lax privacy settings, she says in a way that is definitely NOT creepy. 

I 100% have been doing the same with FB accounts lately. Some of them have some pretty lax privacy settings, she says in a way that is definitely NOT creepy. 

Jokes on them! The two rejections cancel out, because they're negatives and math. Pretty sure Northwestern has to accept you now.